Take A Favourite Game And Make It Sound Awful.

[Truthblade]

A game where you place down blocks. That's it.


Minecraft

 

[TPBx]

After you put in 100s of hours beaten every song difficulty, practice , play every day and got hardcore carpal tunnel. Then some korean  guy with a stupid name like Cookiezi or Jhleeo beats your best score putting in only half the effort.


Osu!

 

[Katie Jensen]

5 counter terrorist operatives defend bombs or take a hostage for some unknown reason and stop the other 5 counter terrorist operatives from defusing/securing the objectives. Dunno why 5 CT operatives are defending bombs and shit and the game never explains


Rainbow 6 Siege 

 

[Sponge]

You try to shoot some guys but then they shoot you and you go on some crazy journey and finally shoot him but he escapes and an Irish drunk man names Irish helps you go into Mexico where you help them win a revolution and finally shoot the guy you were meant to shoot in the first place.


Oh yeah and then you get murdered by corrupt officials.


- Red Dead Redemption

 

[Orikanyo]

Emo Jesus and friends fights the incarnation of depression.


Persona 3


Man-whore goes to small town. Puts a end to local late night T.V drama.


Persona 4

 

[Loki777]

You play as a guy named steve, no storyline or plot. Mine the earth, for hours, looking for ore. Build a structure which will most likely be destroyed by some random asshole online.


Minecraft vanilla edition.

 

[TPBx]

Payday 2: Youre the teenage mutant ninja turtles but instead of fighting crime with your ninja skills, you rob banks with your ninja skills. Instead of fighting wave after wave of The Foot's ninjas, you fight wave after wave of cops. And the game's final boss is basically Shredder, because the Tank is a cop thats nearly unkillable, does a crapload of damage, and has a lot of armor.

 

[Katie Jensen]

Rob bank once. Steal all money and valuables. Return 5 minutes later to presumably steal telephones and staplers.


Payday 2


@TPBx xD

 

[TPBx]

Rob bank once. Steal all money and valuables. Return 5 minutes later to presumably steal telephones and staplers.


Payday 2


@TPBx xD

Rob the same bank 10 times in one day. Still somehow has money in it.

 

[Throne Trinity]

Rob the same bank 10 times in one day. Still somehow has money in it.

Rob bank once. Steal all money and valuables. Return 5 minutes later to presumably steal telephones and staplers.


Payday 2


@TPBx xD

You guys are supposed to make the game sound bad, not fucking radical XD.

 

[MrNeko]

A settlement need your help 


You have to find your son 


You get no choice on what to say only 4 options yes no sarcastic evil 


Game: Here's some power armor at the beginning of the game


Me: But it isn't rewarding 


Game: Just put it on you will need it.


Fallout 4

 

[That Lass Over There]

Forgive me for inserting a lot of community jokes in this... All great games, some sadly a bit niche. Maybe you'll realize some of said jokes through research! (Or, you know, actually buying the games and playing them...)


Yu-Gi-Oh: The game that keeps adding unnecessary things to itself


Magicmaker: Spider thread and whatever else you feel like adding. Spam. Wand that isn't supposed to do anything brainlessly gets damage in the millions.


Life: Refer to NGNL Sora and Shiro's opinions on said game.


Terraria: 

Diablo 1: STAY AWHILE AND LISTEN OR YO | ) /-||\/||\| 455 'BOUT TO GET BUTCHERED. HARD. HOPE YO 455 IMMORTAL. DOES ANYONE ACTUALLY READ THIS?


Starcraft: (props to anyone who realizes things, mostly for effort) N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-Nuclear jerk detected


Dungeons of Dredmor: By ThE pOwErS oF lUtEfIsK i CoMpElL yOu: CoLlEcT aLl Of ThE sTeAm TrAdInG CaRdS aNd BaSh ThEm WiTh ThIs GiAnT gLoWiNg HaMmEr!


... Or, just, you know, give the hammer to Inconsequentia. Nobody really cares if you do some quests.

 

[Abendrot]

cyka blyat rush b

 

[Broncos]

Me: LOOK AT THE PRETTY FISHIES!!


*Werid robots kill them


Me: Fuck


ABZÛ

 

[Vudukudu]

Get captured by bandits until you accidentally become a prominent warlord known for razing villages to fund his fresh-beef-eating habit.


Mount and Blade: Warband.

 

[Devious Dilbert]

"Must save dead girlfriend. I am hero. I kill them. I win."


"No, you are wrong. You suck."


-Shadow of the Colossus

 

[Vaan]

Minecraft AU with personified instruments drawn by tim burton 


- don't starve/don't starve together

 

[Wandering Grim Hollow]

Payday 2: Youre the teenage mutant ninja turtles but instead of fighting crime with your ninja skills, you rob banks with your ninja skills. Instead of fighting wave after wave of The Foot's ninjas, you fight wave after wave of cops. And the game's final boss is basically Shredder, because the Tank is a cop thats nearly unkillable, does a crapload of damage, and has a lot of armor.

This sounds badass and fun. It should be more like this:


Bloodborne: You are a guy with some fantasy cancer who decided to shoot up some wonky blood into you before you fall into a HP Lovecraft inspired dream that may or may not be happening.


FFXV: Brotrip the game


COD WAW: Visit exotic places with locals that either play peekaboo or locals that you can burn to death with molotovs.

 

[arctic]

@Kur0Yuuk1

 

[Me_But_Not_Me]

@HighlyDysfunctional

 

[Aster]

dragon age inquisition: mc has to fix a hole in the sky

 

[Azuria]

Get killed repeatedly while having foreigners yell slurs and profanity in your ear for hours on end.


-dota 2

 

[arctic]

League of Legends: League of Legends

 

[Wandering Grim Hollow]

League of Legends: League of Legends

How apt. Speaking of apt.


Cheeki breeki Russian survival simulator


- Stalker

 

[Azuria]

stab your closest childhood friend and potential love interest because the gods are coming.


-lufia