Fantasy GoH - OOC

[Noble Scion]

Peckinou I believe the RP is still open xp

 

[Noble Scion]

Peckinou Birdsie has informed me that the CS has been declined due to:

Spoiler: Personal

1. the sparsity of detail (Most notably, backstory)
2. the inconsistency with the race given that there already is another cat-person race
3. the organisation, given how gods work in this RP
4. the inexplicable age

Spoiler: Physical

[*]vague description of the enhancements the "Dagger of shadows gives" (comparisons are much appreciated)
[*]lack of information on "shadow minions"
[*]inconsistency with lore with the idea of a "mansion in the dark forest" due to how the dark forest is supposed to work
[*]lack of limits for what the "Shadow beast" form can actually do, roughly how large it is etc.
[*]lack of information on how "shadow blades" work
[*]lack of defined limits on "Shadow wisp" e.g. duration
[*]lack of information on what the "shadow bolt" actually does
[*]"Shadow consumption" seems rather strong, but could be fixed with proper defining of it's range, how strong the shadows are, how easy it is to escape etc.
[*]"shadow devastation" should have a charge time of some sort and a large amount of fatigue on the user, apart from that, it's fine
[*]More description on "shadow orb" would be appreciated
[*]"gullible" should go in personality, rather than weaknesses, and seems inconsistent with the age

That's about it.

 

[Archdemon]

Peckinou
Okay so since Birdsie is going to sleep now since it's 1Am in Poland, I was told to tell you about your CS.

First off, many problems arise up, firstly being your characters age and Race. First off for Age, there is a limit to how old a person can be and while this differs from race to race, not many can live to over a hundred years. Second there is already a neko race that my buddy One Mean Ghost is using that you can use.

Now onto other problems, one glaring problem is the group The 7 Reapers and how they are so powerful that they just destroy armies. First off that's extremely OP if it's just 7 people, second why would they even terrorize those two countries in the first place? Seems weird if you ask me.

The major issues now start to come out, first off his personality "Personality: Is pretty stoic, calculated, has a love for strawberry's and stories, he follows those who accept him, gives him benefits and he thinks are worthy of his services and is also pretty shy when he isn't trying to kill people." This here has many problems. First off it isn't much of a personality than just some quirks he has. There are much better examples of personalities in the characters in this Rp that you could look over for a better idea of how to make a personality. Though I would suggest to look at the first page of the CS Area and take a look at all the characters there for an idea to help you.


Your Backstory is not acceptable at all. "Backstory: Was 5 when his parents were killed by a group of bandits along with his village" this is 1 line of bio, yet it's clear he has more history. With the way I see the character sheet and I look at the backstory, I know that if you made more I'd be in for a lot of Edge. Now in this Rp if your character is either too op or edgy, you won't be accepted, I know that for a fact since Birdsie has denied people already for having too op characters. To avoid this I again suggest taking a look at the back stories of already accepted characters and take inspiration, just be sure not to copy and past the backstories please, because everyone would frown upon that.

Don't take this criticism too badly, I'm not trying to be mean, just being honest and informative.

But for more help you should ask my Friend One Mean Ghost to help you on your CS since he has a pretty good one.

Edit: I had no idea that noble was also making a rejected statement as well, so don't take this as an attack.

 

[Noble Scion]

Edit: I had no idea that noble was also making a rejected statement as well, so don't take this as an attack.

all Birdsie 's fault

 

[Peckinou]

Peckinou
Okay so since Birdsie is going to sleep now since it's 1Am in Poland, I was told to tell you about your CS.

First off, many problems arise up, firstly being your characters age and Race. First off for Age, there is a limit to how old a person can be and while this differs from race to race, not many can live to over a hundred years. Second there is already a neko race that my buddy One Mean Ghost is using that you can use.

Now onto other problems, one glaring problem is the group The 7 Reapers and how they are so powerful that they just destroy armies. First off that's extremely OP if it's just 7 people, second why would they even terrorize those two countries in the first place? Seems weird if you ask me.

The major issues now start to come out, first off his personality "Personality: Is pretty stoic, calculated, has a love for strawberry's and stories, he follows those who accept him, gives him benefits and he thinks are worthy of his services and is also pretty shy when he isn't trying to kill people." This here has many problems. First off it isn't much of a personality than just some quirks he has. There are much better examples of personalities in the characters in this Rp that you could look over for a better idea of how to make a personality. Though I would suggest to look at the first page of the CS Area and take a look at all the characters there for an idea to help you.


Your Backstory is not acceptable at all. "Backstory: Was 5 when his parents were killed by a group of bandits along with his village" this is 1 line of bio, yet it's clear he has more history. With the way I see the character sheet and I look at the backstory, I know that if you made more I'd be in for a lot of Edge. Now in this Rp if your character is either too op or edgy, you won't be accepted, I know that for a fact since Birdsie has denied people already for having too op characters. To avoid this I again suggest taking a look at the back stories of already accepted characters and take inspiration, just be sure not to copy and past the backstories please, because everyone would frown upon that.

Don't take this criticism too badly, I'm not trying to be mean, just being honest and informative.

But for more help you should ask my Friend One Mean Ghost to help you on your CS since he has a pretty good one.

Edit: I had no idea that noble was also making a rejected statement as well, so don't take this as an attack.

Yeah i forgot to add more to the backstory when you were looking at it sorry about that. As for The 7 Reapers yeah they were not alone they had others but the 7 main people were the leading causes of destruction as for why attack 2 kingdoms? Why do people fight wars? Why does terrorism exist? ok real answer for the reason of the 7 reapers is cause they are a cult and their leader had a case of god syndrome thinking he should be able to decide who lives and who dies and that death required sacrifices in order to fuel his power.

 

[Silver Wolf]

Well now....finally made it through reading the 4 recent Main pages...now to browse the CS and get to work on my own tomorrow...night....zzz

 

[Silver Wolf]

Hm....are there any GMs aside from Birdsie?

 

[Silver Wolf]

Oi Birdsie who's Turenval?

Also...how do gods work in this world?

 

[Birdsie]

Oi Birdsie who's Turenval?

Also...how do gods work in this world?

All you need to know about Turenval is:
- Super-Lich
- Powerful enough to scare Gods away
- Has a group of elite undead called Death Knights
- Slowly conquering the world from the Dark Forest
- Evil
- Was once beaten by William Black, the founder of the Guild
- Not very nice guy

Gods work here the same way they do in D&D.

 

[Silver Wolf]

All you need to know about Turenval is:
- Super-Lich
- Powerful enough to scare Gods away
- Has a group of elite undead called Death Knights
- Slowly conquering the world from the Dark Forest
- Evil
- Was once beaten by William Black, the founder of the Guild
- Not very nice guy

Gods work here the same way they do in D&D.

You're looking at someone who knows jack shit about D&D


WAIT
let me change my title

 

[Birdsie]

You're looking at someone who knows jack shit about D&D


WAIT
let me change my title

People worship stuff = creates energy with specific concepts tied to it.
Energy gets vented to Astral Plane.
There, energy melds together and forms sentient beings.
Energy beings create their own planes that drift away from the Astral Plane and become its own distinct places in cosmology.
Energy beings communicate with the people that created them, give these people spooky paladin powers and do miracles and shit, get called gods.

That's the gist of it.

 

[Silver Wolf]

People worship stuff = creates energy with specific concepts tied to it.
Energy gets vented to Astral Plane.
There, energy melds together and forms sentient beings.
Energy beings create their own planes that drift away from the Astral Plane and become its own distinct places in cosmology.
Energy beings communicate with the people that created them, give these people spooky paladin powers and do miracles and shit, get called gods.

That's the gist of it.

Hm...shit could get weirder. Couldn't become weirder than Fire Emblem's gods' essentially they work like this: Dragons...not gods...but gods to men. they go mad eventually and have to be put down. Some dragons kinda left that behind and became a race of dragon-shifting people with less powers. Every continent has its own story how dragons handle bodily urges...well most.

Although D&D sounds like a lot is up for interpretation. Or should I assume that the eldritch powers are more to blame for existence? COnsidering I always thought that if mortals attempted to understand existence itself we would just...go mad ya know.


Then again, I rarely base my lore off of anything. And it tends to be more everywhere from inspiration. Though I do have major inspirations.

Fire Emblem, Anime (can't tell which), myself, and Shintoism...which is quite funny considering gods. Shintoism's results of gods: They everywhere....technically your desk becomes a god after a long enough time.


I kinda asked because I do have some ideas for villains. I could give them in an accordion list here.

 

[Birdsie]

Although D&D sounds like a lot is up for interpretation. Or should I assume that the eldritch powers are more to blame for existence? COnsidering I always thought that if mortals attempted to understand existence itself we would just...go mad ya know.

In D&D, the mythology is so contrived and ancient that not even the oldest deities remember how existence came to be. The truth is actually that in the beginning there were three dragons: Syberis, the Dragon Above; Eberron, the Dragon Between; and Khyber, the Dragon Below. Kyber slew Syberis, and in response, Eberron twisted her body around Khyber to envelop her forever. According to that, everything inside Eberron's body is existence as we know it, but this legend is probably limited by in-universe understanding and interpretation.

I'm certain there weren't just three dragons floating around in nowhere. It's just a fancy way of saying three energies interacted with each other in certain ways, I bet.

 

[Silver Wolf]

Dwagons....hehe...I'm on one of my mania episodes now...great...

Dragon ORgies aside, what qualifies a villain as OP?

 

[Silver Wolf]

Noble Scion or Birdsie

is it fine for characters to be already in the guild when we make them?

 

[Noble Scion]

Noble Scion or Birdsie

is it fine for characters to be already in the guild when we make them?

I'm not a moderator xp
but from what I've seen, yes, you're allowed to make already-existing members.

 

[Silver Wolf]

I'm not a moderator xp
but from what I've seen, yes, you're allowed to make already-existing members.

Well then, I guess that means someone must've liked my first CS.

 

[Noble Scion]

Well then, I guess that means someone must've liked my first CS.

I wasn't accepting it xp
I just thought it was pretty neat

 

[Silver Wolf]

I wasn't accepting it xp
I just thought it was pretty neat

How so? I kind of dislike how edgy I may have made the character.

 

[Noble Scion]

How so? I kind of dislike how edgy I may have made the character.

It had detail, which I found quite pleasing xp

 

[Silver Wolf]

It had detail, which I found quite pleasing xp

Personality felt vague and the whole backstory was a shitpost I thought of after playing some Assassin's Creed origins...I also feel I made him a little too generic compared to character #2 Backstory isn't everything.

 

[Noble Scion]

Personality felt vague and the whole backstory was a shitpost I thought of after playing some Assassin's Creed origins...I also feel I made him a little too generic compared to character #2 Backstory isn't everything.

If you want to be so hard on yourself, sure xD
I found it delightful.

 

[Silver Wolf]

If you want to be so hard on yourself, sure xD
I found it delightful.

I don't mean to run myself into the ground, but I have had a hard time playing characters I wrote kind of...generic. Dude loses whole family to asshole sibling, kills sibling, pisses off in teenage angst. When I did make edgelords, I found it VERY hard to play them. Eventually, in an RP I tried to give them a legitimate reason to struggle...but that RP flopped and I kinda regret some of what I did in it, even though it was a different character. Birdsie might remember the BS I had flung in from my issues.

So I kinda have issues now with playing quiet edgelords or very happy outgoing characters cause it brings back bad memories of me being an ungrateful, blaming, and moody piece of shit. That was like...a year ago I think.

 

[Noble Scion]

I don't mean to run myself into the ground, but I have had a hard time playing characters I wrote kind of...generic. Dude loses whole family to asshole sibling, kills sibling, pisses off in teenage angst. When I did make edgelords, I found it VERY hard to play them. Eventually, in an RP I tried to give them a legitimate reason to struggle...but that RP flopped and I kinda regret some of what I did in it, even though it was a different character. Birdsie might remember the BS I had flung in from my issues.

So I kinda have issues now with playing quiet edgelords or very happy outgoing characters cause it brings back bad memories of me being an ungrateful, blaming, and moody piece of shit. That was like...a year ago I think.

There's nothing wrong with generic characters. Gandalf is just your stereotypical wise mage, and he's an amazing character! You'll do fine xD everyone gets better.

 

[Silver Wolf]

There's nothing wrong with generic characters. Gandalf is just your stereotypical wise mage, and he's an amazing character! You'll do fine xD everyone gets better.

Nice sentiment, but as I said, it is kind of a personal issue. Now I just need to find out where to put the f***er. He isn't related to the guild in any way...so I'm debating whether to have him appear at random while someone is off doing shite.

Maybe a meeting between a dessert dweller whose society turned away magic meeting a fallen angel might be humorous.