Experiences Whats making you angry today? Rp pet peeves

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Which is why I'm careful to call it romantic doubling. It's kind of like how you have toxic water and plain water. I don't have a problem with people playing multiple characters which is just plain doubling. What I have a problem with is specifically when doubling is used as a way to make people play multiple romantic pairings.

Because it's inevitably it's just a more elaborate way of saying "I only play females (or males)." Because they make this big deal about how they'll play a male for YOU but only if you play a male for them first. And it's like, sometimes it isn't about who is playing the male. Sometimes it's just about how selfish it is that you act like your special and shouldn't have to play both genders when you immediately turn around and expect your partner to do just that.

Maybe I'm fine playing a male as long as I'm actually ASKED. And not made to feel like I'm just filling in the romantic pairings that you want to roleplay.
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I have a take on this.

I once read a short novel called "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime" by Mark Haddon. The protagonist is a fifteen year old heavily autistic mathematical savant.

The story kind of rotates around it because it's so interesting.

When you introduce some atypical (see: Atypical) personality trait into your story, you will almost always shift some (often a large) amount of focus onto that trait. And if you aren't going to focus or explore that trait or treat it with some kind of import, why would you even mention it? As a great dead playwright once said: "keep it simple, stupid".

When you introduce a character concept to another person, you're basically providing them a reference sheet regarding how you're going to play that character and what things you're going to be focused on. Whether that's your intention or not, that's generally how it's going to be perceived.

You might consider something like autism or being gender-fluid as just a matter of course and you might have a thousand pages in your head of characterization that dwarfs the character's gender-fluidity as a cornerstone personality trait, but there's no real way to know that for your partner.

A better way to approach RPs with atypical characters is maybe to keep all that shit to yourself and slowly reveal it through exposition, because that way it'll seem more natural and not as in-your-face to your partner.

Atypical personalities and mental disorders are difficult enough for people to deal with in real life - it's not a stretch to imagine that many people would rather just not in their leisure time.

I once dated a girl with bipolar disorder, and while she was adorable and demure most of the time, dealing with her depressive phases was extremely tiring. If I struggled to be understanding and compassionate to someone that I love, why would I tolerate and/or choose to expend such effort dealing with a fictional creation of some stranger's on the internet?

that's an interesting viewpoint, and i definitely understand where it's coming from, but it doesn't necessarily defend the viewpoint of "being uncomfortable" with neurodiversity. i'd understand if people don't want to be held back or annoyed in their rp by an autistic character, but that makes the assumption that a character who is mentioned to have autism spectrum disorder will automatically be the irritating or intolerable stereotype - which, for the most part, they aren't. nor are they automatically guaranteed to be an annoyance to the rp partner or the other characters, or the story as a whole, just because another facet of depth in their character is their experience with mental illness and how they deal with it internally, which can be a massive part of developing any character in general.

i do understand the viewpoint, of course on a more objective level, but at the same time it doesn't read well, either. especially since i can speak from experience of having asd and having experience of writing characters on both different and similar sides of the spectrum that i'm on, my primary issue is mainly someone seeing "asd" or "anxiety disorder" or "schizoaffective disorder" and assuming that it'll be a massive drag to have to deal with this other character without really focusing on how that disorder is presented in the character sheet or how it plays into their psychology and into their personality (because "autistic" isn't a personality trait)

in general, a character with autism being included in a story doesn't automatically mean that the story warps the fabric of the plot or lore to focus solely on their experiences with autism. actually, a lot of the time it can be precisely the opposite - it's as much of an internal struggle as any insecurity or internal struggle that any neurotypical character would have. at the same time, it can add a lot to a plot in terms of depth and intrigue, and can face the cast with some really intriguing situations if they happen to be the philosophical type. what i was talking about in the op wasn't only people who didn't want to deal with an oc with a more stigmatized mental illness, but people who assumed that "asd" only meant that "annoying, irritating, intolerable stereotype of making weird noises and making weird faces", or people who assumed that "schizoaffective" only meant "psychotic murderer", or who assumed that any neurodiversity at all was required to be so central in a character's personality that it would ruin the entire story around it by proxy.

of course i could take your advice about avoiding mentioning it in the cs and slowly revealing it throughout the story, but to me that seems to read similarly as if i tried to "ease into" revealing that my character was, say, gay or transgender or black. it reads the same as "i'm sorry, my oc happens to be neurodiverse, i hope that doesn't bother you, please don't ghost me <3" which, hmm, enabling that type of closed-minded mindset by having to convince someone to "tolerate" a neurodiverse oc doesn't seem to do much good in the long run

it can be read either as reasonable advice or as "you have to be the one to conform to someone else's prejudice by easing into adding diversity to your ocs" depending on who happens to read it, which is an interesting trait for a hot take to have
 
Idk, I can sort of see both sides of this argument. Yes, diversity is good, especially for under-represented groups. However, on the flip side there's some negative stereotypes associated with said groups that players may not want to deal with. However, assuming the worst about these characters and how they're presented could be a prejudiced biased on the player's part). Also, some players just don't know how to realistically write or react to these characters and don't want to put in the effort of researching it. Some players are just lazy like that.
 
that's an interesting viewpoint, and i definitely understand where it's coming from, but it doesn't necessarily defend the viewpoint of "being uncomfortable" with neurodiversity. i'd understand if people don't want to be held back or annoyed in their rp by an autistic character, but that makes the assumption that a character who is mentioned to have autism spectrum disorder will automatically be the irritating or intolerable stereotype - which, for the most part, they aren't. nor are they automatically guaranteed to be an annoyance to the rp partner or the other characters, or the story as a whole, just because another facet of depth in their character is their experience with mental illness and how they deal with it internally, which can be a massive part of developing any character in general.

i do understand the viewpoint, of course on a more objective level, but at the same time it doesn't read well, either. especially since i can speak from experience of having asd and having experience of writing characters on both different and similar sides of the spectrum that i'm on, my primary issue is mainly someone seeing "asd" or "anxiety disorder" or "schizoaffective disorder" and assuming that it'll be a massive drag to have to deal with this other character without really focusing on how that disorder is presented in the character sheet or how it plays into their psychology and into their personality (because "autistic" isn't a personality trait)

in general, a character with autism being included in a story doesn't automatically mean that the story warps the fabric of the plot or lore to focus solely on their experiences with autism. actually, a lot of the time it can be precisely the opposite - it's as much of an internal struggle as any insecurity or internal struggle that any neurotypical character would have. at the same time, it can add a lot to a plot in terms of depth and intrigue, and can face the cast with some really intriguing situations if they happen to be the philosophical type. what i was talking about in the op wasn't only people who didn't want to deal with an oc with a more stigmatized mental illness, but people who assumed that "asd" only meant that "annoying, irritating, intolerable stereotype of making weird noises and making weird faces", or people who assumed that "schizoaffective" only meant "psychotic murderer", or who assumed that any neurodiversity at all was required to be so central in a character's personality that it would ruin the entire story around it by proxy.

of course i could take your advice about avoiding mentioning it in the cs and slowly revealing it throughout the story, but to me that seems to read similarly as if i tried to "ease into" revealing that my character was, say, gay or transgender or black. it reads the same as "i'm sorry, my oc happens to be neurodiverse, i hope that doesn't bother you, please don't ghost me <3" which, hmm, enabling that type of closed-minded mindset by having to convince someone to "tolerate" a neurodiverse oc doesn't seem to do much good in the long run

it can be read either as reasonable advice or as "you have to be the one to conform to someone else's prejudice by easing into adding diversity to your ocs" depending on who happens to read it, which is an interesting trait for a hot take to have
I don't normally like to mention it, but I suffer from a serious mental illness that keeps me in the hospital for roughly a fifth of the year most years. I'm happy enough to provide proof if you feel like I'm not being sincere. This being said, I think a lot about this subject since it has such an impact on me personally.

You wouldn't know it to look at me, but I understand that people (especially strangers) who interact with me or even just stand near me can 'feel' something different or wrong. My girlfriend says that I have 'crazy eyes'. I don't want it to be, but my disorder certainly is a major factor in how I interact with and how the world interacts with me. I and other atypical people might be equal to other people, but we aren't equivalent, and I think that we have to be keenly aware of it in order to find a place to fit in. It's not society's duty to make room for us - it's our duty to find a place for ourselves.

I understand your desire for atypical characters to be treated the same as neurotypical characters, but it just isn't the case in reality. If you think of it with a fantastic analogue it's a little easier to wrap your head around:

Say you want to start an RP that revolves around a group of Elves striking out from their home and exploring the world. Would you be happy to allow a player to play a dragon that was adopted by elvish parents? Sometimes just the way a character is precludes them from being a good fit for what a person want to do or for what kind of story they want to tell. I feel strongly that being tolerant of it is very important.
 
I don't normally like to mention it, but I suffer from a serious mental illness that keeps me in the hospital for roughly a fifth of the year most years. I'm happy enough to provide proof if you feel like I'm not being sincere. This being said, I think a lot about this subject since it has such an impact on me personally.

You wouldn't know it to look at me, but I understand that people (especially strangers) who interact with me or even just stand near me can 'feel' something different or wrong. My girlfriend says that I have 'crazy eyes'. I don't want it to be, but my disorder certainly is a major factor in how I interact with and how the world interacts with me. I and other atypical people might be equal to other people, but we aren't equivalent, and I think that we have to be keenly aware of it in order to find a place to fit in. It's not society's duty to make room for us - it's our duty to find a place for ourselves.

I understand your desire for atypical characters to be treated the same as neurotypical characters, but it just isn't the case in reality. If you think of it with a fantastic analogue it's a little easier to wrap your head around:

Say you want to start an RP that revolves around a group of Elves striking out from their home and exploring the world. Would you be happy to allow a player to play a dragon that was adopted by elvish parents? Sometimes just the way a character is precludes them from being a good fit for what a person want to do or for what kind of story they want to tell. I feel strongly that being tolerant of it is very important.

that's definitely true, although you talk about real life, and the truth is that even realistic rps are vastly different from real life. a majority of ocs that i've seen from other people in realistic/modern rps aren't the types of people you'd meet in real life, so personality in a roleplay is already diverse enough to lessen that gap between neurodivergence and neurotypical. it isn't so much a desire for neurodivergent characters to be treated the same as neurotypical characters as it is for people to be less prejudiced against neurodivergence in a setting where nothing is being forced on them or their characters in the first place.

i don't follow the belief that someone is validated or invalidated based on their life experiences, especially when the subject is a fictional universe, so whatever opinion you hold has the same validity whether you chose to mention your struggles with mental illness or not.

the original issue wasn't based on the fictional universe, but on a real person's prejudiced beliefs and how they hinder roleplay when their rp partner happens to have a diverse cast. for a hypothetical example, someone who is ableist in real life who asks me to change my characters just because they happen to have asd. there are a lot of assumptions being made here, but the biggest one to address is that mental illness isn't a situation that is always comparable to your analogy of dragons and elves, which seems to strike uncomfortably close to comparing it to the argument on mary sue characters being "unique for the sake of being unique" while their uniqueness (and having to compensate or tolerate or deal with their uniqueness) destroys the entire plotline in the process. those are two very different situations, and aren't at all on equal grounds enough to be compared to each other. comparing them is a very thin and dangerous line to tread, as well, just from the prejudiced implications that it brings.

my original question was to ask for someone to explain the viewpoint behind someone who would let real-life prejudices dictate a fictional universe, or someone who would ask another person to change how they write or what characters they use in a roleplay because they're personally uncomfortable with (which oftentimes reads as "against") racial, lgbtq, or autistic representation. you brought up a lot of real and intriguing points, which only led me to the conclusion to find more open-minded peple to roleplay with. thanks for your perspective though, it helped a lot and brought a lot of interesting subjects to mind!

happy travels xoxo
 
biggest pet peeve is when people i'm planning an rp with back out only after they see my characters, or say "i'm uncomfortable with you having lgbtq/black/transgender/autistic ocs"
(translation: please make them white or korean, cis, straight, and neurotypical xx)
which unfortunately has happened to me more than once

i can,, sort of understand people who only want to rp hetero ships
i guess
but especially if my ocs arent going to be in a romantic relationship with theirs anyway its just ??? why is it an issue it literally has nothing to do with you
idk if someone knows why this ^ is please explain to me why someone would drop a platonic rp because the other person's oc happened to be lgbtq, poc, or has asd

I'm just going to bring about a list lol. It can be due to many, many factors from my personal experience, like:
1) Stereotypes (I talk more about it later) and playing devil's advocate how they may be played
2) Trauma/Triggers
3) Escape from reality (different from trauma and triggers as this could be literally anything from day-to-day life or from something really stressful that they don't have the emotional strength to deal with online)
4) Mental Illnesses are actually scary and shouldn't be romanticized or glorified, same with autism
5) People who are still uncomfortable with the ideas, but try to go through it to live vicariously through their characters to better understand (maybe in a slightly semi-realistic or unrealistic way) on how to deal with the problems. This can be either healthy or unhealthy or can give misinformation
6) Not understanding how things like this work and afraid of "being diverse" so they don't step on people's toes.
7) If benefit of the doubt is gone...


To me when I see this, I see this as "I'm not comfortable with how they may be portrayed because stereotypes and they can be triggering or they can cause something in the RP I'm trying to escape from." Of course, giving them the benefit of the doubt. I don't see why being a different race will do anything about it unless it's traumatic, and at that point if I don't get the answer of "it's a trigger for me", I'm going to let the benefit of the doubt sail away because that's pretty suspicious. lol

1)
But it probably has something to do with their perceptions of how those characters are. With autistic characters, the spectrum is so vast (and don't even get me started on the "outliers" that are asperger's as that's not considered a part of the autistic spectrum anymore for some reason, unless I'm getting that backwards) that it's hard to have a good perception of it unless you are going through it yourself or have a friend/relative you are actually helping through their life and helping them find ways to cope and learn in different ways. Media often portrays this in mixed ways and they usually portray the really debilitating, extreme side of the spectrum. Because of this, when someone hears or sees "autistic", they do actually think of someone nigh-inconsolable screeching, raging misfits who find anything and everything unnerving and troubling and it causes them to malfunction every two seconds. Obviously, that's not correct (I have seen someone do that in school and they legit had autism, but they were consolable at least. They were just screaming about having to change schedules, as autistic people and those of other mental illnesses sometimes find a routine as something very grounding). Savants are similar in this regard (I've seen people confuse prodigy kids with savants and it's uh.... Interesting to say the least). This can be applied to the other aspects of a character that may be "out of the norm" in an RP site such as this. Stereotypes are the first thing in our brains (it's either our implied bias at play or explicit bias) when we hear anything that we are not familiar with, it can intimidate us.

2)
LGBTQ+ is something interesting. I am related to someone by marriage who had a horrid encounter with them in prison and absolutely hates them due to trauma. Then I have friends who dislike the community, but like the individual members who may or may not be a part of that community because not all communities are filled with bad apples (they do certainly create interesting stereotypes though). Then I have friends who are in the community and are generally good people. Obviously, if a characteristic (race/religion/even identity and sexuality) is traumatic to someone, the good thing is be a good sport about it and don't press on it. This can also be applied to the other "out of the norm" aspects of a character.

3)
Granted, there's a person running around who wants to be transracial and become Korean and get all this surgery to look like that one man in a K-Pop band. It could just be that something clicks and you see yourself as that and you dump who you were before because that isn't you anymore, like this one person who is probably going through a mental crisis and is probably famous now due to the news they're in, and anything that reminds them of the fact that they aren't Korean bothers them (similarly to being gender dysphoric, but that's a different issue altogether. I can't pretend like I know it, but I can at least give broad explanations of many perspectives, like it could be dysphoria, trauma, or feeling like you should be that and anything that breaks that reality hurts and makes you uncomfortable). Maybe, in a more general sense, that's what people are going through. In a more light-hearted sense and in no way in making fun of people who actually do go through it, I have read RP posts about doing the dishes. Irl, I hate doing the dishes, but I'm a Stay-at-Home mom. It's my job and duty to get the house clean. So it bothers me when I see it in the RP because I know I should be doing it irl, but I don't. (Not to say I can't handle it. I totally can. It just reminds of something I'm ashamed about.)

4)
They just want to escape from their reality, escape from who they are and what they have to deal with, and just RP those things away. Plus, people who find mental illnesses disturbing or those who go through with it on the daily or those who have relatives/friends who go through with it don't want to see it because it's heartbreaking. Most mental illnesses can be debilitating and can cause a lot of undue stress for those affected and their families. Not saying people can't fight them and become remarkable people in our society and it's difficult to tell, but it takes a lot of perseverance and willpower to get there, and some people don't have the support structure to get there.

I was talking about this to somebody the other day and they would rather RP something fun and slice-of-life rather than talk about the effects of depression and anxiety and dementia within the RP that their parent had to go through every day. It gets triggering for them not only because it reminds them of someone, who they care deeply about, going through that phase, but you can either glorify it in your writing and insult them and their parent and everybody else who has it rough with that stuff, or you can make it so uncannily similar that it breaks the immersion and make them upset.

I doubt autism has anything like that, but I have seen people who see autism as a sort of impassable wall to become like someone in society and function to an extent. Honestly, they should watch Temple Grandin, an amazing movie about how debilitating autism can be, but how successful they can be if they find the right talent and work hard at it. Most people with autism think differently and until they find how their brain works (made more difficult by the fact that everyday, mundane things make it difficult for them to concentrate like the ticking of a clock or the lack of a support structure that actually understand what they are going through), they are usually stuck and end up gaining depression, anxiety, along with all kinds of crippling self-doubt. Not sure if Temple Grandin in that movie is also a savant for all things mechanical (like she can see equations just by looking at something insignificant and knows instantly how to make it better), an idea that is perpetuated often in media as not all autistic people are savants and not all savants are autistic (unless I'm getting that wrong), but it is fairly common enough that those who are debilitatingly autistic can also be really good at a certain thing.

5)
Then you have people like me who like to RP those horrible facets of reality in a shocking, yet understanding and semi-realistic way of showing it. I don't like dealing with very heavy topics like depression and everything that pertains to that, but I do like having my characters go through bouts of depression and seeing how they cope with it. I go through it on occasion and I like to see it in RP, so I can either make my partner's character feel better or have their character make mine feel better. It's therapeutic and I'm living vicariously through the characters in that sense.

6)
But most people don't want to live through their characters vicariously, or they do and they don't want anything triggering or what they are going through be something their partner's character goes through because they only know how to cope for themselves, and not know how to cope with anybody else having that issue. They may also have a misunderstanding or have an unhealthy way of dealing with or thinking about something and they don't want to subject that onto their RP partners. They don't want to fall into the stereotypes on accident (because I've done that sometimes and it's a little embarrassing as I didn't mean to and yet it happened anyway without me noticing it) and they are aware that they may fall into the implied bias and give their character a backstory that fits a little too well with the stereotype of a race or a character with a mental illness. Or have them react a certain way that causes stress on the aforementioned character because they believed it would help/work when in actuality it doesn't, and it actually bothers people.

7)
If none of these are applicable, sad to say that the person likely can't handle anything out of the norm because it scares them, unnerves them and they don't know how to act, or they are just a jerk and is probably that asshole who laughs at people for their disabilities and parks in the disabled parking spot.


All in all, that's what I see and I have tried to compile into something readable XD LOL hope that helps. I left the last one as the last one because not everybody is a jerk or phobic of something. They likely have very valid reasons brought about from their experiences or their friends or the media and it's nothing against you or your character.

I have had people RP as a wheelchair-bound Pokemon trainer and I thought that as the most amazing, awesome, coolest thing I've ever seen as everybody just has these athletic kids able to tame a Haxorus lol XD So seeing some people who have difficulties with other people or have something that prevents them or makes it harder for them to do something or perform in a situation is so fun to explore and play around with (respectfully, of course). I'm also a sadist, so I like hurting my characters and that of my partner's if they consent. xD

You also have to understand that a lot of people who RP online nowadays are, most of the time, going through something in their life. Like a mental illness, rough life, and many other different things. It's likely that if the RP is going to be stressful, they bolt because they don't want the stresses of their life to negatively impact the RP (and by extension, you and themselves) because it becomes stressful. Or, like, a good group of people on here are heavily anxious about delving into neurodivergent/other characteristic types, especially when it's not common. Many of their comfort characters are in line with what we have in the anime/fandom world, or they have niche topics. There can be many other different things when it comes to comfort but they usually are wish-fullfilment powerhouses. Other times, it's kids who have some spare time but are too young to actually know how to deal with something as complex as autism without angering you or anybody else and they see that and bolt. Other times, they don't want to subject their RP partners to their know-it-all, prideful attitudes when it comes to it because they are teenagers or young adults, they are self-aware, and they'd rather not make an enemy. XD

Like I said, many many different reasons. :3
 
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In my experience it’s usually pretty easy to spot the bigots on this site. If only because of they tend to be people who are not used to being questioned on their bigotry. So a lot of it is just implicit bias that they assume is “normal” and get very upset with whenever you question them.

So if you have someone and you aren’t sure whether or not they’re a bigot or just don’t happen to like specific stereotypes just ask.

“Hey can I have queer themes?” If the answer is no, “Okay what themes specifically don’t you like?”

Cuz ya know queer is a fairly broad term (it’s like asking people can my character be a doctor, what that word means often says a lot about the person without them realizing it)

*You can do the same with any minority identity I just used queer cuz that’s the one I have run into most often.


Distantly related has anyone else ever run into a partner who was clearly lying about their age? I know there is a lot of people who have over eighteen only rules but I am not one of them. So it always throws me off when I’m talking to someone and it’s very clear they aren’t as old as they claim to be.

It’s usually a similar scenario in that they say things that clearly indicate they aren’t an adult IRL just because they are describing things in a very childlike way.

For instance describing buying a house, getting a job, going to college as if it was something out of a rom com. Now I know not every adult goes to college or buys a house or even has a job. But the older you get the more of your peers are in that position so if nothing else you can get experience through them.

I don’t think it bothers me per se, just it’s kinda weird to be writing with someone who is supposedly my age but writes their life experience as if they were half that.
 
Distantly related has anyone else ever run into a partner who was clearly lying about their age? I know there is a lot of people who have over eighteen only rules but I am not one of them. So it always throws me off when I’m talking to someone and it’s very clear they aren’t as old as they claim to be.

It’s usually a similar scenario in that they say things that clearly indicate they aren’t an adult IRL just because they are describing things in a very childlike way.

For instance describing buying a house, getting a job, going to college as if it was something out of a rom com. Now I know not every adult goes to college or buys a house or even has a job. But the older you get the more of your peers are in that position so if nothing else you can get experience through them.

I don’t think it bothers me per se, just it’s kinda weird to be writing with someone who is supposedly my age but writes their life experience as if they were half that.
Not this site yet, but I've run across this on Deviantart. I agree not every adult has all the same life experience. I know many who still live with parents, never paid their own bills past a phone bill, and are thirty and can't figure out what to do when tax filing time comes. And as far as learning through friends, well, some don't hear things until they have no choice.

But even keeping that in mind I've gotten suspicious and even caught people lying about age.

Top ways-

1. They get mad and vent about parents or school and get caught on advise I would give someone who's adult but still living at home.

2- It become clear their school complaints are not about college.

3- They for some reason never thought I would look at thier profile page and browse their stuff. One actually had a recent post celebrating being back after being booted for being underage.

4-I saw them give a different age on the comments of a RP add to another kid.

Also, I had someone I got suspicious with when they got too caught up asking me why I don't RP with minors. Especially when they get flustered my reasons are not because I assume kids aren't good RPers. I know minors can be creative and write well. Talent isn't an age indicator. It's a matter of responsibility and not wanting to annoy some kids parents by talking about drinking and witchcraft.
 
Not this site yet, but I've run across this on Deviantart. I agree not every adult has all the same life experience. I know many who still live with parents, never paid their own bills past a phone bill, and are thirty and can't figure out what to do when tax filing time comes. And as far as learning through friends, well, some don't hear things until they have no choice.

But even keeping that in mind I've gotten suspicious and even caught people lying about age.

Top ways-

1. They get mad and vent about parents or school and get caught on advise I would give someone who's adult but still living at home.

2- It become clear their school complaints are not about college.

3- They for some reason never thought I would look at thier profile page and browse their stuff. One actually had a recent post celebrating being back after being booted for being underage.

4-I saw them give a different age on the comments of a RP add to another kid.

Also, I had someone I got suspicious with when they got too caught up asking me why I don't RP with minors. Especially when they get flustered my reasons are not because I assume kids aren't good RPers. I know minors can be creative and write well. Talent isn't an age indicator. It's a matter of responsibility and not wanting to annoy some kids parents by talking about drinking and witchcraft.
I had someone once, whose age on their profile set to 40, have a bit of a disappearing act only to return explaining their absence as being grounded by their parents. I mean, everyone has...issues...but it was even more suspicious when they mentioned also having a lot of homework.
 
That reminds me of the time I was roleplaying with someone in their forties and they said god told them they couldn't roleplay with me anymore. I have no doubt they were sincere and it's actually kinda sad. Cuz like their the kind of person who I think probably should have someone looking after them just to make sure "god" doesn't tell them things that make them disruptive to the public. We had a guy like that in my old job that ended up getting banned from the premise after he stalked one of the employees and had a obvious breakdown at the workplace.

So I definitely think there are probably people who are adults who might have parental figures in their life who monitor their internet usage OR who even might have homework they have to go over. I'm totally fine with that and I don't mean to be like "ugh these are all childish things."

It's just the way the issues are presented I guess? Like there is a difference between how a forty something year old would talk about homework and their parents versus a fourteen year old.
 
I had someone once, whose age on their profile set to 40, have a bit of a disappearing act only to return explaining their absence as being grounded by their parents. I mean, everyone has...issues...but it was even more suspicious when they mentioned also having a lot of homework.

To be fair, a 40 year old could have lots of homework if they happen to be in college. Some people do go to college at that age. The part about being grounded is definitely odd and suspicious, however.
 
To be fair, a 40 year old could have lots of homework if they happen to be in college. Some people do go to college at that age. The part about being grounded is definitely odd and suspicious, however.
That is true but after the whole grounding thing, the homework was the last straw.
 
Oh definitely. That just makes it sound like some kid. Why a kid would be claiming to be 40 is beyond me.

I had a kid on another site claim they were 69, and another claim they were 115. XD it's way too obvious that that were kids. XD they didn't last long in the site anyway
 
I had a kid on another site claim they were 69, and another claim they were 115. XD it's way too obvious that that were kids. XD they didn't last long in the site anyway
Honestly, might have just been claiming those ages as a joke and didn't expect anyone to take it seriously. The 69 especially.
 
Not this site yet, but I've run across this on Deviantart. I agree not every adult has all the same life experience. I know many who still live with parents, never paid their own bills past a phone bill, and are thirty and can't figure out what to do when tax filing time comes. And as far as learning through friends, well, some don't hear things until they have no choice.

But even keeping that in mind I've gotten suspicious and even caught people lying about age.

Top ways-

1. They get mad and vent about parents or school and get caught on advise I would give someone who's adult but still living at home.

2- It become clear their school complaints are not about college.

3- They for some reason never thought I would look at thier profile page and browse their stuff. One actually had a recent post celebrating being back after being booted for being underage.

4-I saw them give a different age on the comments of a RP add to another kid.

Also, I had someone I got suspicious with when they got too caught up asking me why I don't RP with minors. Especially when they get flustered my reasons are not because I assume kids aren't good RPers. I know minors can be creative and write well. Talent isn't an age indicator. It's a matter of responsibility and not wanting to annoy some kids parents by talking about drinking and witchcraft.
I'm a minor who's been doing rp for...oh jeez, four years now? And this is the sort of thing I wish I saw when I first started out. It's almost impressive how many kids want respect but don't respect the comfort zones of adults.

That said, it is frustrating sometimes. A lot of the kids on sites like these don't have a lot of writing experience, and it gets pretty disappointing when every writing partner you find writes poorly thought out OCs with one-liner, badly written replies. I was one of those kids once, so no hate to them, but as someone with more experience it's a little demoralizing when every thread I find interesting is 18+. Still, that doesn't make lying about age a good idea. The problem with being a minor who does rp is that it's hard to find people who you genuinely enjoy writing with AND who are in your age range.

Either way, lying is bad, tell the truth, respect boundaries, etcetera etc etc
 
I'm a minor who's been doing rp for...oh jeez, four years now? And this is the sort of thing I wish I saw when I first started out. It's almost impressive how many kids want respect but don't respect the comfort zones of adults.

That said, it is frustrating sometimes. A lot of the kids on sites like these don't have a lot of writing experience, and it gets pretty disappointing when every writing partner you find writes poorly thought out OCs with one-liner, badly written replies. I was one of those kids once, so no hate to them, but as someone with more experience it's a little demoralizing when every thread I find interesting is 18+. Still, that doesn't make lying about age a good idea. The problem with being a minor who does rp is that it's hard to find people who you genuinely enjoy writing with AND who are in your age range.

Either way, lying is bad, tell the truth, respect boundaries, etcetera etc etc
Might be a bit of a generational thing, but when I was underage many years ago I never had difficulty finding partners. If anything, I had an easier time finding RP partners. It's gotten harder as I've gotten older. I suspect it's due in part to my RP interests changing as I aged. Nowadays I'm into some pretty niche subjects, while in my youth most of my RP interest was in pretty generic fantasy type stuff. There's never a shortage of partners for that.
 
I think a couple of people mentioned it but it's still annoying regardless, when you're asking questions about a potential roleplay and the other person doesn't even respond. Not only that, they bring up stuff that has nothing to do with anything. I mean seriously.
 
I think I mentioned this before, but am amazed with how many different ways people try this. Trying to toss in some kind of mind control on a character and getting annoyed when I'm not open to them going on a list of how it works and how I'm suppose to now play the character.

This time is was some kind of potion that was suppose to make the character basically friend worship someone.
 
I never get people who are like "our characters must be besties" I'm like having characters who don't get along is what makes the plot arc interesting. I mean I'm not great at writing very dynamic characters personally but I get genuinely excited every time my partner writes a character who is like "ugh this person is lame and dumb" because that means there are gonna be some push back between characters.
 
Not an RP-exclusive thing, it's literature in general, really. I just hate long-winded descriptions of scenery (or even worse, individual objects that don't have any real significance to anything), it just feels like a cheap (and often rather self-indulgent) way of making the post longer whilst adding nothing of value to it.
 
Not an RP-exclusive thing, it's literature in general, really. I just hate long-winded descriptions of scenery (or even worse, individual objects that don't have any real significance to anything), it just feels like a cheap (and often rather self-indulgent) way of making the post longer whilst adding nothing of value to it.
Here goes Tolkien describing the consistency of butter again for seven paragraphs.
 
I never get people who are like "our characters must be besties" I'm like having characters who don't get along is what makes the plot arc interesting. I mean I'm not great at writing very dynamic characters personally but I get genuinely excited every time my partner writes a character who is like "ugh this person is lame and dumb" because that means there are gonna be some push back between characters.
I blame over the top friendship cartoons. It's brainwashing.

But yeah, I like to play characters against a range of personalities. It can be a different mind set dealing with friendly or unfriendly characters. Heck, how about some different shades of each. How someone deals with buisness associate friendly vs super great friend will he different.
 
Not an RP-exclusive thing, it's literature in general, really. I just hate long-winded descriptions of scenery (or even worse, individual objects that don't have any real significance to anything), it just feels like a cheap (and often rather self-indulgent) way of making the post longer whilst adding nothing of value to it.
Oh yes. Not a fan of purple prose myself. If I describe something it's bound to have relevance in the story somewhere.
 
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