Experiences So you're a terrible GM, huh?

[Murdergurl]

I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one out there with this issue:

I make lots of characters, for lots of settings, and across a slew of genres. The problem is, I can never find a good group RP to play them in.
I've never been much for 1x1 RPs, and prefer groups if I'm ever in a roleplaying mood.
Sure, I can make a new character for stuff that I see others advertise. That's IF I see something I actually take interest in.
But my problem is that I can't find settings for characters that I have made and really want to play.
When I make characters to fit into advertised RPs, I feel like I'm just settling for what's out there.
So I'm always in this half-hearted participation mode.

Now, I know what you're going to say:
"Why don't you just make your own group RP, Murdergurl?"

Well, golly gee wilikers, I never thought of that! *gasps facetiously*

I've tried to GM RPs before. More than a few times, actually.
Quite frankly, it's not something I am very good at. Nor do I find any pleasure in attempting to do so.
Organizing other writers into a cohesive plot is a gift, one that I myself do not possess.
It's a frustrating headache at best, and a total cluster fuck at worst.

So here I am, with more than a handful of great OCs I want to play, but with no one running group RPs that I can place them in.
Sucks to suck, amiright?

 

[Idea]

So... do correct me if I'm misunderstanding here, but the issue is as follows:

1. You make premade OCs you really like, and will half-ass it if you have to make a character for an existing roleplay because you feel you are "settling" with what is out there. Implying then that despite it being something you're interested in (as you mentioned you wouldn't participate in roleplays you weren't interested in) it just isn't good enough.
2. You can't find roleplays to fit them in, I presume, due to incompatibility of minor details or because it doesn't match the "feel" you'd want for the setting or the character.
3. You don't feel confident that you could make your own RP and manage it.

Am I in the ballpark here? I just wanna be sure I'm not misunderstanding before I give a more detailed response.

However, I'm gonna say in advance, probably the best and most realistic solution is to get a group of trusted friends/Rpers and try to organize a group amongst you. Nothing big, so that none of you has to take a heavy GM role, while at the same time making it manageable enough to more or less include people's desires.
Alternatively, 1x1 roleplays would also do the trick.

If you really insist that it must be a group roleplay and the small friends group solution isn't enough, I do think there is a fundamental problem here that has a bit more of a long-term solution, but I don't wanna say it without confirming I'm not off the mark on what you were saying.

 

[Chordling]

Gods. I used to act like I was allergic to group roleplays. Musician six years ago wouldn't go near em. She would just stick to her happy little one on one roleplays. But one day I had this idea with pirates and steampunk. I was still comfortable with one on one roleplays and the idea of being a GM was pretty terrifying. Not gonna lie about that. So I made a thread in this forum actually to display what I had come up with without any intentions of making or running the roleplay at first. I just wanted to see what people thought of the idea at first. A couple of people took interest in it and that is what encouraged me to set up the interest check and run the roleplay.

So, I came up with this setting originally for myself, and then I decided to share it with others. It's a lot more rewarding when you can talk with other roleplayers and GMs about ideas and techniques. I'm in the process of planning my second roleplay as a GM with a similar tactic. I am obviously not the best GM in the world but I still find it really fun and I irrationally want to be a full-time GM for the rest of my time on the site. XD

 

[Murdergurl]

So... do correct me if I'm misunderstanding here, but the issue is as follows:

1. You make premade OCs you really like, and will half-ass it if you have to make a character for an existing roleplay because you feel you are "settling" with what is out there. Implying then that despite it being something you're interested in (as you mentioned you wouldn't participate in roleplays you weren't interested in) it just isn't good enough.

What I mean is that I will wait for a period of time for something of interest to come up on the boards. Most of the time, i don't see much that I'm interested in. Or I will see something I THINK I will like, but after investigating the parameters or further details, I'm like... meh. So out of a (let's call it desperation), I eventually will cave and go ahead and express interest in something that kinda sorta interests me and do my best to make some kinda character for it. But because I've formed this character into the confines of something I settled for, I am not nearly as enthusiastic of RPing them as say, my own OCs that were created without any confines. I mean, this doesn't sound too far out for me. I imagine a lot of people can relate to that.

2. You can't find roleplays to fit them in, I presume, due to incompatibility of minor details or because it doesn't match the "feel" you'd want for the setting or the character.

Can be a variety of things: Species, setting, technology... but the most common problem I have is the role that the characters are supposed to play. For example: I have a dragon slayer character. Her central motivation is dragon slaying (duh!). But I don't readily find RPs that have a group going after dragons. Or a fandom character created for a specific timeline that I can't find anyone running. Or an interstellar criminal sci-fi cyborg set in our futuristic galaxy.

3. You don't feel confident that you could make your own RP and manage it.

Through experience, I KNOW I can't. Tried and failed quite a few times, so it's a fact.

Am I in the ballpark here? I just wanna be sure I'm not misunderstanding before I give a more detailed response.

However, I'm gonna say in advance, probably the best and most realistic solution is to get a group of trusted friends/Rpers and try to organize a group amongst you. Nothing big, so that none of you has to take a heavy GM role, while at the same time making it manageable enough to more or less include people's desires.
Alternatively, 1x1 roleplays would also do the trick.

I'm gonna be honest with ya, I've been Rping on and off for the better part of 2 decades. Joined and left a variety of sites for a variety of reasons. I've never been one to get all chummy with anyone specific. More so now than ever, as I got mommy duties and shit. So my free time is limited. I don't have bunches of time to chat up internet buddies. I just want to write stories with people in group participatory fashion.

If you really insist that it must be a group roleplay and the small friends group solution isn't enough, I do think there is a fundamental problem here that has a bit more of a long-term solution, but I don't wanna say it without confirming I'm not off the mark on what you were saying.

1x1s have always made me anxious. I don't like getting overly friendly or familiar with any single individual. Which his why I am typically only comfortable with group RP. There is less pressure to depend on any one person, and I don't have to chat with anyone in a personal conversation. I also don't like to cater my narrative to a specific individual and like to change up the options with the variety the group provides.

 

[Murdergurl]

Gods. I used to act like I was allergic to group roleplays. Musician six years ago wouldn't go near em. She would just stick to her happy little one on one roleplays. But one day I had this idea with pirates and steampunk. I was still comfortable with one on one roleplays and the idea of being a GM was pretty terrifying. Not gonna lie about that. So I made a thread in this forum actually to display what I had come up with without any intentions of making or running the roleplay at first. I just wanted to see what people thought of the idea at first. A couple of people took interest in it and that is what encouraged me to set up the interest check and run the roleplay.

So, I came up with this setting originally for myself, and then I decided to share it with others. It's a lot more rewarding when you can talk with other roleplayers and GMs about ideas and techniques. I'm in the process of planning my second roleplay as a GM with a similar tactic. I am obviously not the best GM in the world but I still find it really fun and I irrationally want to be a full-time GM for the rest of my time on the site. XD

well, kudos to you for the enthusiasm. I can't handle it myself. too much pressure, and too much catering. And juxtaposedly, I feel I am allergic to 1x1s. I feel extremely awkward with the dynamic. Like it demands too much attention to the other individual with no other options to branch off.

 

[Folly-Derrezzed]

Soounds like a tough dilemma.

 

[Idea]

What I mean is that I will wait for a period of time for something of interest to come up on the boards. Most of the time, i don't see much that I'm interested in. Or I will see something I THINK I will like, but after investigating the parameters or further details, I'm like... meh. So out of a (let's call it desperation), I eventually will cave and go ahead and express interest in something that kinda sorta interests me and do my best to make some kinda character for it. But because I've formed this character into the confines of something I settled for, I am not nearly as enthusiastic of RPing them as say, my own OCs that were created without any confines. I mean, this doesn't sound too far out for me. I imagine a lot of people can relate to that.



Can be a variety of things: Species, setting, technology... but the most common problem I have is the role that the characters are supposed to play. For example: I have a dragon slayer character. Her central motivation is dragon slaying (duh!). But I don't readily find RPs that have a group going after dragons. Or a fandom character created for a specific timeline that I can't find anyone running. Or an interstellar criminal sci-fi cyborg set in our futuristic galaxy.



Through experience, I KNOW I can't. Tried and failed quite a few times, so it's a fact.



I'm gonna be honest with ya, I've been Rping on and off for the better part of 2 decades. Joined and left a variety of sites for a variety of reasons. I've never been one to get all chummy with anyone specific. More so now than ever, as I got mommy duties and shit. So my free time is limited. I don't have bunches of time to chat up internet buddies. I just want to write stories with people in group participatory fashion.



1x1s have always made me anxious. I don't like getting overly friendly or familiar with any single individual. Which his why I am typically only comfortable with group RP. There is less pressure to depend on any one person, and I don't have to chat with anyone in a personal conversation. I also don't like to cater my narrative to a specific individual and like to change up the options with the variety the group provides.

Alright, it's as I thought. There is a bit of a fundamental issue here, and the solution is unfortunately not one that can be reached quickly. The problem, or I suppose, problems I am referring to are:

1. You are searching for something too specific. There's a one in a billion chance that a roleplay will drop that just fits all of one's preferences, on top of needing the right timing and that you see it to begin with.

2. The relationship you're seeking is too one-sided. They have to fit your specifications, but you don't wanna "cater" to them. From what you described it doesn't even seem like you want to talk to the other people in your group let alone befriend any.

Both of these combine to a situation where unless someone is specifically, miraculously looking for something which your exact mold you can't be satisfied. They have to be asking for exactly for what you were going to give anyway.

To exemplify what I mean, I'll take two of the examples you used in responding to my second part of the summary:

I have a dragon slayer character. Her central motivation is dragon slaying (duh!). But I don't readily find RPs that have a group going after dragons.

In here you seem to expect that the entire group has to be about dragon slaying, instead of your character just has the independent goal of dragon slaying. There are plenty of fantasy RPs out there, and in most of them a character that slays dragons wouldn't be out of place, but if you want a group specifically about dragon slaying you're going to have a much harder time.

Or an interstellar criminal sci-fi cyborg set in our futuristic galaxy

This one again, seems like it could fit any number of RPs out there, basically any that spatial exploration in it. So I can only come to the conclusion that something about it is making it more specific: Either "our" galaxy, meaning in some way it has to specifically fit a perceived notion of a futuristic Milky way, or more likely it would have to be a group about interstellar criminals or even interstellar criminal cyborgs specifically.

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The only way I see through this is a change in perspective. I get that we can't change how we feel, but working with other people fundamentally does not involve them catering to your needs in a way you won't do for them. Your bar is set too high for people to meet, so I must raise the question: Do you want to write an RP or a book? If working with other people is an important aspects, and thus you really want RP and not a book, then the only way out is to stop tying your ability to enjoy things to them matching exactly what you wanted.

Edit: I notice that this may appear as an attack or a call-out and I wanted to try to make it clear, I am not accusing or attempting to do any such thing. I believe this is an issue that is at core, and not easy to solve, but without addressing it your problem simply cannot be resolved. My apologies for any perceived rudeness coming from my words.

 

[Ace Cream]

Can be a variety of things: Species, setting, technology... but the most common problem I have is the role that the characters are supposed to play. For example: I have a dragon slayer character. Her central motivation is dragon slaying (duh!). But I don't readily find RPs that have a group going after dragons. Or a fandom character created for a specific timeline that I can't find anyone running. Or an interstellar criminal sci-fi cyborg set in our futuristic galaxy

As someone who is too lazy to create my own RP I learned to compensate my character so I can fit them in someone else's RP. My gun toting nerd elf isn't always played as gun toting nerd elf, sometimes she's a pirate with flintlocks, or a musketeer. My pyromaniac plague doctor is a cult leader in one RP and an alchemist in another RP. At this point I only keep the core concept of my OCs instead of their character sheet, this way I can be very flexible and put them almost in any RP I want.

 

[g r i m]

Have you thought about maybe looking for someone to Co-GM with you? You don't necessarily have to be friends with them or even have personal conversations. Also to be fair I've met plenty of people that I consider RP friends that I don't talk about personal stuff with. Just have someone that you can bounce ideas off of makes running RPs a lot easier.

I can get not wanting to be friends with people, but it does feel like you consider interacting with people to be almost burdensome. Which will create problems no matter if it's 1x1 or groups.

 

[Murdergurl]

Whoof, ok.. gonna multi-reply here:

Alright, it's as I thought. There is a bit of a fundamental issue here, and the solution is unfortunately not one that can be reached quickly. The problem, or I suppose, problems I am referring to are:

1. You are searching for something too specific. There's a one in a billion chance that a roleplay will drop that just fits all of one's preferences, on top of needing the right timing and that you see it to begin with.

2. The relationship you're seeking is too one-sided. They have to fit your specifications, but you don't wanna "cater" to them. From what you described it doesn't even seem like you want to talk to the other people in your group let alone befriend any.

Both of these combine to a situation where unless someone is specifically, miraculously looking for something which your exact mold you can't be satisfied. They have to be asking for exactly for what you were going to give anyway.

Yes, I'm looking for specific kinds of RPs for my OCs. Honestly, some are a lot harder to fit than others. But then some I think really aren't that hard and just are not in popular themes. Like, currently I have an ad out for a SW character. I don't require anything but a specific era. And in regards to Star Wars RPs in general, that's usually one of the first things defined. i.e. Clone Wars era, Cold War era, First Order era, etc.

And as I said before, I don't have as much time to dedicate to RPing as I used to in years past. So I've become a little more stringent as to what I want to get into. 10 years ago, 15 years ago... I got into all kinds of RPs. 3 or 4 at a time without any issue. Now, I'll probably just do one or two. Because that's really all I have time for. So those RPs I participate in have to be something I really want to spend my little bit of freetime on, ya know?

In here you seem to expect that the entire group has to be about dragon slaying, instead of your character just has the independent goal of dragon slaying. There are plenty of fantasy RPs out there, and in most of them a character that slays dragons wouldn't be out of place, but if you want a group specifically about dragon slaying you're going to have a much harder time.

Well, no. not exactly. But a dragon would have to be a very definite element. Either a major contender to be dealt with, or smaller threats that are a constant. otherwise what is the point of having the character around?

This one again, seems like it could fit any number of RPs out there, basically any that spatial exploration in it. So I can only come to the conclusion that something about it is making it more specific: Either "our" galaxy, meaning in some way it has to specifically fit a perceived notion of a futuristic Milky way, or more likely it would have to be a group about interstellar criminals or even interstellar criminal cyborgs specifically.

You would think it would be easy, right? Our futuristic galaxy, yes. The Universe even. Big, wide setting to play with, just rooted in our irl in the future. But the few times I've seen a setting of this kind, the roles don't match up. She's basically an underworld smuggler/thug. Most of the time I see these genres as colonists or some kind of paramilitary theme. I'm looking for underworld related.

The only way I see through this is a change in perspective. I get that we can't change how we feel, but working with other people fundamentally does not involve them catering to your needs in a way you won't do for them. Your bar is set too high for people to meet, so I must raise the question: Do you want to write an RP or a book? If working with other people is an important aspects, and thus you really want RP and not a book, then the only way out is to stop tying your ability to enjoy things to them matching exactly what you wanted.

Edit: I notice that this may appear as an attack or a call-out and I wanted to try to make it clear, I am not accusing or attempting to do any such thing. I believe this is an issue that is at core, and not easy to solve, but without addressing it your problem simply cannot be resolved. My apologies for any perceived rudeness coming from my words.

Look, I don't even need to be some central character or even be super-involved in the plot arcs. Tbh, that's why I LIKE group RP. Because if there are a whole bunch of us making up our little parts, mine doesn't need to be so focused on or pivotal. And while I've attempted to write my own stories, I lack the motivation to see them through. My hubby writes little fan fics, and I applaud him for seeing them to conclusion. But I can't. If I write by myself, I get bored and invariably drop my idea.

EDIT: And no, I don't think you are attacking me or being rude. no worries. :-)
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As someone who is too lazy to create my own RP I learned to compensate my character so I can fit them in someone else's RP. My gun toting nerd elf isn't always played as gun toting nerd elf, sometimes she's a pirate with flintlocks, or a musketeer. My pyromaniac plague doctor is a cult leader in one RP and an alchemist in another RP. At this point I only keep the core concept of my OCs instead of their character sheet, this way I can be very flexible and put them almost in any RP I want.

My problem is that I write my characters super detailed. So much so, that dragging them out of their original setting kind of dismantles them.
Here's an example of what I mean.

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Have you thought about maybe looking for someone to Co-GM with you? You don't necessarily have to be friends with them or even have personal conversations. Also to be fair I've met plenty of people that I consider RP friends that I don't talk about personal stuff with. Just have someone that you can bounce ideas off of makes running RPs a lot easier.

I have had this notion brought up to me. I honestly don't know how I feel about it. Mostly because I don't really understand how it works. And also because I don' feel like I could participate in a plot, while simultaneously calling out people in what they are writing. It feels like I would be acting unfairly to the other participants by moderating and also participating in the same narrative. Kinda reminds me of little kids making up rules to a game as they go along. So like, I guess I could set up the lore and setting and whatever. But I wouldn't want to be involved in the plot or guidance. Would someone else even want to do that? Seems like I get to do the fun part, and they get the dredge work.

I can get not wanting to be friends with people, but it does feel like you consider interacting with people to be almost burdensome. Which will create problems no matter if it's 1x1 or groups.

Not gonna lie, talking to one person for too long does start to get tiresome for me. both online and irl. It has nothing to do with the other individual. They can be perfectly polite and friendly. I just am not a very social person, and it wears me out. Like, i see a lot of people making jokes about being "anti-social" (what they really mean to say is: introverted ), but I really AM that. I see how it can be problematic on social sites, but as I had mentioned to Idea , I can't find it within myself to get anything done on my own. I DO enjoy writing with others. I just don't particularly enjoy talking to them OOC in any kind of elongated timespan. lol
Like, after a week I have the sentiment of: Why does this person keep PMing me?

 

[Crayons]

I mean, you may not like talking to people, but you have to see it as a necessary part of the roleplay experience. No one wants to think they are only there to service your need for roleplay partners and not be a human being in their own right. It's like if you have a small business doing something you love, for example, art. You still have to do all the stuff you hate like finances, marketing, and - which I believe is the direct equivalent here - networking, but it's tough titties because otherwise you won't get the work.

I would advise you make a new OC for each of the RPs that you do join, rather than trying to shoehorn an existing one in. It would help you feel more at home in the roleplay, and less like you are compromising yourself.

 

[Murdergurl]

I mean, you may not like talking to people, but you have to see it as a necessary part of the roleplay experience. No one wants to think they are only there to service your need for roleplay partners and not be a human being in their own right. It's like if you have a small business doing something you love, for example, art. You still have to do all the stuff you hate like finances, marketing, and - which I believe is the direct equivalent here - networking, but it's tough titties because otherwise you won't get the work.

I would advise you make a new OC for each of the RPs that you do join, rather than trying to shoehorn an existing one in. It would help you feel more at home in the roleplay, and less like you are compromising yourself.

funny you should mention the art. A lot of the time, you can delegate those tasks to someone more attune to them.
I mean, if we are talking hoighty toighty high society (pretentious) art, they usually have brokers and agents and whatnot.
And the artist themselves can be some weird shut in. lol
I wonder if I can get an RP broker? haha

And it's not that I completely dislike talking to people. I just don't like getting too personal, or talking to any specific individual for too long of a duration. I don't mind the public forums too much. But PM conversations give me a lot of anxiety. Especially when people start to get like overly friendly and start telling/asking about personal life stuff. I dont know how else to put it except that I'd rather just keep any PM convos "strictly business".

And more often than not, I do wind up having to make a new OC for the stuff I join in on. What my OP was about, was that I have this build up of characters that I want to play but they just sit there. I assume that most people have some OCs that they'd really like to play, but rarely get the chance, right? Well, I'm in the same situation. Only that after years of keeping my OCs on the back burner, and having to constantly make new ones instead, I've gotten rather tired of NOT RPing the things I really want to. Now with my hobby time becoming so limited, I really want to focus on the scenarios that I actually, really want to RP. Instead of participating in roleplays I settle for just so that I can be a part of SOMEthing and not be perpetually scrolling into page 8 on last months adverts.

 

[Crayons]

funny you should mention the art. A lot of the time, you can delegate those tasks to someone more attune to them.
I mean, if we are talking hoighty toighty high society (pretentious) art, they usually have brokers and agents and whatnot.
And the artist themselves can be some weird shut in. lol

Yeah, ha ha, no. That never happens. Unless you are one of maybe ten artists that make it to that level of notoriety. In order to get to that point you need to do all the things I mentioned and more, plus have luck, connections and money. If you talk to anyone doing arts (anything creative: music, illustration, comics, w/e) as a freelancer, you have to do literally everything yourself.

That is as unrealistic an idea as expecting to find the perfect roleplay for your existing OCs without having to talk to anyone: i.e. not at all realistic.

Like, honestly, it's hard enough finding the RPs that suit you anyway without giving yourself the additional burden of not speaking to people. Most players are understanding if you don't want to discuss personal matters but being open to communication is pretty much essential.

 

[Murdergurl]

That is as unrealistic an idea as expecting to find the perfect roleplay for your existing OCs without having to talk to anyone: i.e. not at all realistic.

Like, honestly, it's hard enough finding the RPs that suit you anyway without giving yourself the additional burden of not speaking to people. Most players are understanding if you don't want to discuss personal matters but being open to communication is pretty much essential.

Well, i dont do one-on-ones, so I think the communication is a bit different. Since the originator of the RP is catering to a group, I don't expect them to change anything around just for me. When I find something I might like, i ask a lot of questions about the parameters of character building and lore and such. Usually i get all the answers back. Sometimes I make a character, sometimes I don't. I do communicate. And I do occasionally participate. But like I said, I just can't find a home for my self-sustained (for lack of a better term) OCs without having to make the RP myself. I get how ridiculous it sounds. Trust me I do. And I dont expect anyone to bend to my wants. This is just my ever-present conundrum, is all. With my favorite, OCs that I have put a ton of effort to make and create detailed backgrounds for, there is just no realistic way to play them in other people's worlds unless I find that unicorn RP.

 

[Chordling]

Your conundrum is the same reason why I cannot reuse any of my characters because I create the characters specifically for the setting that is being used. I always have to make a new character for each roleplay I join and I haven't roleplayed in a setting that would be appropriate for the opportunity to even consider reusing someone from the past.

 

[Murdergurl]

Your conundrum is the same reason why I cannot reuse any of my characters because I create the characters specifically for the setting that is being used. I always have to make a new character for each roleplay I join and I haven't roleplayed in a setting that would be appropriate for the opportunity to even consider reusing someone from the past.

This is exactly how I feel sometimes. And imagine pouring a few days worth of free-time into an OC just to have the corresponding RP die within a week. lol
So I have taken some of my favored characters, worked on them more, and made them quite epic (imo). But the problem still stands that they need a somewhat specific or VERY specific setting to be able to participate.

 

[Chordling]

You might want to consider creating characters for roleplays you are interested in rather than trying to find settings that fit for your characters. I know it's probably something you have considered and might not be what you necessarily want but that is usually how people join roleplays. Lots of settings kind of propose that they look for specific characters to be made for their setting anyway. Again, not ideal, but that is kind of the nature of things.

 

[Murdergurl]

You might want to consider creating characters for roleplays you are interested in rather than trying to find settings that fit for your characters. I know it's probably something you have considered and might not be what you necessarily want but that is usually how people join roleplays. Lots of settings kind of propose that they look for specific characters to be made for their setting anyway. Again, not ideal, but that is kind of the nature of things.

Well, I mean. I kindof have done that. I even made a fandom character (currently advertising, actually), for a popular fandom. It shouldn't get much easier than that to get a character into a setting. But if you mean that I should make a character for an advertised RP that is already out there... well, I already do that. It's just that I don't feel very strongly about actually RPing these characters as I do my other OCs that I make all of my own volition. And I can't just force myself into motivation, ya know?

 

[Chordling]

I usually think about my character's belief system and morals. That aspect of a character is what makes me feel connected to them the most. I can roleplay a character well if I understand how they will react to different situations based on their personal morals. That's how I've gotten better at creating multiple characters that feel different from one another without running into the motivation issue. Finding how you connect to the character the best in other ways could be helpful for you, too.

 

[Murdergurl]

Most of my characters are anti-heroes at best, outright villains at worst. I write them in a variety of backgrounds and persona, but they are usually pretty broken and/or have some screws loose. Drug addicts, sadists, thieves, liars, criminals, and manipulators. Aesthetically, they tend to exhibit flaws too. I try to get away from model-esque characters that fall into a simple trope. Pretty sure I shared this already, but Nadia is one of my favorite characters that I never get to play. Her bio actually excludes all the extensive universe worldbuilding that goes along with the character because then I feel that she would definitely be overdefined in her setting. But I still have yet to be able to fit her in anywhere.

 

[Crayons]

Well, i dont do one-on-ones, so I think the communication is a bit different.

No, it isn't. I was basing my post on group RP since thats what you mention you find hard to find.

I, too, have specific kinds of RPs I want to do that I never find, even without pre-made characters. It is really hard, and I sympathise with that. But don't make it harder on yourself.

And sometimes, yes, I have a character I made from an RP that died that I really really want to play, but can't. If I can't adapt it into a similar setting in another RP then, yes, it has to just sit there and not be used. I've had some success with stripping characters to their basics and building them up to fit the RP, you can try that, but I don't think that will work if your character is incredibly detailed and comes with a lot of worldbuilding.

 

[Murdergurl]

No, it isn't. I was basing my post on group RP since thats what you mention you find hard to find.

I, too, have specific kinds of RPs I want to do that I never find, even without pre-made characters. It is really hard, and I sympathise with that. But don't make it harder on yourself.

And sometimes, yes, I have a character I made from an RP that died that I really really want to play, but can't. If I can't adapt it into a similar setting in another RP then, yes, it has to just sit there and not be used. I've had some success with stripping characters to their basics and building them up to fit the RP, you can try that, but I don't think that will work if your character is incredibly detailed and comes with a lot of worldbuilding.

Well, I try to omit the worldbuilding when looking for a place to use the character. I figure the GM should already have their own (similar) setting, so why would I infringe the worldbuilding on them? That'd be a little ridiculous on my end, I think.

I think I've just gotten to the point where after years and years of making characters... it has become a sort of drag. And I've peeled back to just the ones I want to keep and play out. The rest kind of becomes a chore. Which, as I had said before, is why I feel considerably less motivated with new characters made for specific RPs I see advertised.

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Hello there!

Flexibility and communication are two key concepts when it comes to roleplaying. And maybe the problem might be rooted in the perception you have over such concepts, and as previously mentioned, shifting in perspective might be the most advised in order to make things work out in a way that both satisfies you and your roleplay partners. Sometimes we just need to look at things from a different point of view.

These two concepts I mentioned before are the basis of roleplaying:

• Without communication, you cannot explain what you are searching for, nor "negotiate" the roleplay in an efficient way. This "negotiation" is important, as reaching a common ground between your wishes and interests and the other roleplayers' ones is what makes everyone have a good time whilst roleplaying. Plotting and character development discussion are also rooted in communication, and trying to shut it down or distancing oneself from it when roleplaying leads to the downfall of the roleplay, as ideas cannot be expressed in the right way and freely.
• Flexibility is essential because if one is not open to new ideas and contributions from the other roleplayers it is hard to find a group of people who will be willing to accept everything you are looking for without questioning it, or without wanting to change certain details. I am sorry for saying this, but there is no roleplay partner like that. Flexibility, being open-minded about your plot is important in order to form a balanced and harmonious environment for all the roleplayers. In fact, when we put up a plot idea out there and when someone shows interest in roleplaying it, I believe that the idea itself is not only mine anymore, it also belongs to the other person (or people, in the case of group roleplays). Therefore, my ideas and plot shall not be regarded as superior (or "core") to the other roleplayers' ones, and listening to them is always something important. Same goes for characters: my character is not more important than my roleplay partner's character. They should both have the same importance on the story. When it comes to books, this is often not true, as different characters have different levels of relevance for the story, however, in roleplaying this is also very important.

Well, I do talk. I tend to get all my questions done right off in the first post or two. if I have further question based on answers given, i then ask those. I get right to the point most of the time. I figure if the GM or players have something to ask me during the course of the RP they will do it... or visa-versa. When I used to advert for my own stuff, I always included my post style, availability, and often had a writing sample on request or linked. similarly, I will make that known to any groups that I join in on. I will ask if the character concept I want to bring is viable. and if for whatever reason, my style of play or character is not something that they have room for, I politely see myself off. no harm, no foul.

The flexibility... well, I will readily admit that as the years have worn on, I have gotten a lot more rigid with my requisites. As mentioned before, this has a lot to do with my availability to participate. I dont have the freetime that I used to many years ago. So I have gotten a lot pickier about what I want to involve myself in. to be perfectly honest, sometimes I feel like I volunteer TOO MUCH flexibility when trying to get into RPs because what inevitably happens is that I lose interest in the RP. Why? Because I was too open to get into something, and my fleeting interest waned. So at that point I can either drag the group down with delayed and unmotivated participation, or bow out. This is a shitty thing to do to a group, so it's much better to be more strict with what I want to get into, right?

When I first came to RPN I found it strange the fact that people were using different characters to each new roleplay. This because it was usual for roleplayers to reuse characters they created, and roleplayers often created characters firstly and then the roleplay. Nowadays, this creation process was inverted, and I understand why roleplays are created firstly, and then the OCs: depending on the world we are roleplaying in, different characters will have different backstories, different ambitions, different relationships, even different personalities. A lot of the environment the characters are inserted in has a lot of influence over who they are. Creating OCs before the roleplay is what it would be like if Humanity existed before planet Earth was created.
As mentioned before, understanding the character's morality is also important, and something that makes them unique from other characters. Maintaining these core concepts across characters will make them similar, and obviously, vice-versa. So, by understanding how your characters lead with certain things you can have different characters with a similar personality, but with different concepts. And therefore you can explore characters that look like one another when it comes to personality, but that can also be integrated into different universes. Obviously, as these characters are different from themselves, not so much in personality, but in other aspects, they will be two different characters.

Funny you should mention that. My hubby actually tells me that there are very definite similarities in a lot of my characters. So without really looking into them, I've actually created a semblance of the same type of character in a multitude of roles and genres. But despite this, I can't really get them into their respective tales.

With this, I am not saying that you should mould to what others want, but taking into consideration that they might also want is important. For example, taking the example of your dragon slayer OC: we had this character in one of our DnD sessions whose main drive was to kill dragons. Still, the campaign wasn't about killing dragons at all. However, the character agreed on going on the quest with the party, because he was hoping he could use their help in order to find the dragon he was searching for, that had killed his family. Did he find the dragon? Absolutely not. But he started connecting with the other party members, and by the end of the campaign, even though he wanted to kill the dragon still, he was happy to finally being able to make friends and help them around. In fact, his swordsman skills (that were used to kill dragons) were actually very useful in lots of times. So, depending a lot on the universe, you can insert in a different way your characters in them, even though, as explained before, this might not be the best option.

That seems viable in a very long and drawn out setting. However, I will count myself lucky to participate in a group RP that sees even a short mission into completion. Building long, LONG term character relationships seems like taking leaps before steps. This seems like I'd just be building head-canons of my character by involving them in a bunch of this surrounding but not including them in what they were meant for, with only a small chance of ever achieving their creative intent.

I feel you when you say you want to use your characters. I have been thinking about a roleplay that will probably be set in a different version of our world, and I already have characters for that. Does it mean that I won't be ready in order to make changes to how the world functions? Of course not, I am totally open to ideas (in fact, I have actually been asking for help with that, as well, writer's block and originality issues). I am perfectly fine with listening to opinions and take them into consideration. There is one limit: I won't change my character's core personality and concepts in order to fit what the other player wants. Maybe we can discuss what type of characters would work the best, and maybe if the character I wanted to use does not fit the overall story, maybe I'll create another one. But changing their core concepts in order to satisfy others is something that's out for me. This depends a lot though on the roleplay. In TTRPGs, this will be definitely different, but the dynamics are also different.

Wel, I've attempted to make some of my characters a bit more flexible. But oftentimes they get picked apart too much. This to the point where I no longer want to play them out. A couple of minor things are fine. But major things are not readily moved on unless it's just one major thing. Even then, it's iffy. But if it's a whole bunch of minor things or a combination of a bunch of small things and a big thing... that's a deal breaker. What these things are depend on the character, tbh.

If you are not willing to communicate and to be flexible about the concepts you want to explore, as it was suggested, maybe writing a book or short stories is what you are looking for. I understand the motivation issue: I have been with a dreadful writer's block, and I don't create stuff since like 6 months ago. These characters I talked about come from such personal writings. However, in the roleplay, I am totally fine with changing most part of what I created, and actually explore a new version of such concept. In fact, it gives me inspiration for such personal writings. Creating characters for roleplays I am partaking in has also been interesting. My characters are usually very detailed too, so creating a detailed character for a new roleplay, that I don't know if will last long is daunting. Still, don't see it as losing time: after all, you can always use such character in personal writings, or even take parts of themselves that might inspire you in order to write other characters. I can't say that the characters I create for new roleplays are the best ones I have ever created, because often I create them kind of "in a hurry", but I like to think that the base concept is strong, and that by knowing such, that I can use them in order to roleplay.

I started RPing when I was about 14... and I think I started trying to seriously write my own fiction when I was twenty or so. But seventeen years later, and I haven't finished a single. goddamn. story. Like, I've started plenty of my own work. Files and files of stories that have transported themselves across at least three laptops and one desktop computer. Most of them just serve as nostalgia, or references that I use bits and pieces for in new stories (that I will also not finish). So while I do love to write, I definitely have a problem with finishing anything I start on my own. But... that's a horse of a different color.

It's late, and I can't remember if I stated this already: But I actually think I'm at a point where I am burnt out on constantly having to create new characters. I have plenty in stock, and I've already rehashed a few of them into somethin else. It's gotten to the point where I've just picked out my favorites and I just hide the rest away in a cluster of respective files. My pinterest account is equally as messy and complicated, with so many categories and sub-categories for concept art that might one day be used. But it's all gotten to the point where it's too much. I have my handful of characters that I actually care about. and writing anything else is just a chore.

Still about communication: roleplaying is a social activity, unlike writing. As mentioned before, you'll need to talk to people in order to get around it, it is inevitable. I myself am a huge introvert. However, if I don't interact with my roleplay partner I won0t be able to come across anything. I don't need to be best friends with them, we don't even need to be friends. But we will have to discuss a lot our ideas and expectations. And that can only be achieved through dialogue.

This turned out rather long, so sorry about that! I hope you can find a way of making things working for you!

No worries about the length. I'm falling asleep as I finish this up... but I appreciate the time you took to give your advice and perspectives.

 

[Murdergurl]

In the end, I guess we all have different ways of seeing things and preferred ways of how to deal with roleplaying. But what matters is that we have fun! I hope everything goes fine for you!

Very much so. In the end, no one should pull themselves out of the way they want to do things if it makes them uncomfortable or if they feel they are compromising too much. I have no delusions that my issues are caused by anyone other than myself with my own limitations. But C'est la vie.

For the sake of brevity, I'd just like to say thank you for your responses. Yours, and everyone else that has responded to this thread Idea Chordling Folly-Derrezzed Ace Cream Crayons
I appreciate everyone's input and concerns and advice. I've already acted on some of it, and will consider other points. But (for me) this thread has run its course. So again, much Thanks. But I will be now be unwatching this topic and removing myself from further discussion. Feel free to keep going with one another if ya want. :-)

 

[M.J. Saulnier]

I can't stress enough how important PROPER it is to create characters for plots and settings, rather than trying to plug & play random characters into settings you want to play them in... It just doesn't work like that. Never has, never will. Not where real story telling and character development are concerned.

As someone who, by their own admission, has no issue with creating many diverse and unique characters across any genre, you should really get into the habit of making new characters for new projects with that exact plot and setting in mind. This is the only proper way to create stories and characters. Only then will your OCs begin to feel natural and organic in their given settings.