PopcornPie
Dazed, confused, but chugging on.
Consider this a part two of my thread asking how to avoid problematic characters. It provides all the context.
In a nutshell, dad found out about my primary RP muse, the Gravity Falls character Giffany. He has banned me from using her on the grounds that she is inappropriate. I can carry her through the end of RPs she is already in, but I can't write anything new with her. So the only option is to kill her off at the end of said RPs.
But here's the thing...she is flat, she can be annoyingly cheerful, and I do tend to drag her away to do her own thing...but, and this is going to sound strange, but I have an attachment to her now. She's the first canon character I have played to my memory, and, even if she needs development, I still enjoy writing her. I just enjoy writing this klutzy, energetic girl who just wants companionship. Hell, roleplaying with her, using her to improve my writing...it gave me a love for writing that I never felt before. I have her to thank for even being here.
Really, I should have asked for criticism earlier. I do want her to be liked. I do want her to be the best she can be. If I just asked people what they really thought of her, then I wouldn't be asking this at all. I wouldn't be faced with killing her. To be forced to kill her off now that I have a pocketful of tips for strengthening her, and never get to practice them with her, just doesn't feel fair. But I can't fight it.
I just...I don't have the heart. I think about emotional death scenes all the time, but now, when I'm actually faced with killing off a character, I can't bring myself. She has potential. If I go through with the plans I cobbled together, and kill her off, I'll never be able to give her that growth. I could say she was just a spirit in a shell, and reincarnate her, but it wouldn't be the same. Even if I found a character with her exact personality, it wouldn't be the same.
Despite my big blocks of text and flowery vocabulary, I really am still an fledgling RPer at the core. This is going to be my first time killing anybody off. Just thinking about it is hurting me. So...what do I do? Is there anything I can do to at least numb the pain? What is the method to killing off a character gracefully? Or is there a deathless solution I could use instead?
In a nutshell, dad found out about my primary RP muse, the Gravity Falls character Giffany. He has banned me from using her on the grounds that she is inappropriate. I can carry her through the end of RPs she is already in, but I can't write anything new with her. So the only option is to kill her off at the end of said RPs.
But here's the thing...she is flat, she can be annoyingly cheerful, and I do tend to drag her away to do her own thing...but, and this is going to sound strange, but I have an attachment to her now. She's the first canon character I have played to my memory, and, even if she needs development, I still enjoy writing her. I just enjoy writing this klutzy, energetic girl who just wants companionship. Hell, roleplaying with her, using her to improve my writing...it gave me a love for writing that I never felt before. I have her to thank for even being here.
Really, I should have asked for criticism earlier. I do want her to be liked. I do want her to be the best she can be. If I just asked people what they really thought of her, then I wouldn't be asking this at all. I wouldn't be faced with killing her. To be forced to kill her off now that I have a pocketful of tips for strengthening her, and never get to practice them with her, just doesn't feel fair. But I can't fight it.
I just...I don't have the heart. I think about emotional death scenes all the time, but now, when I'm actually faced with killing off a character, I can't bring myself. She has potential. If I go through with the plans I cobbled together, and kill her off, I'll never be able to give her that growth. I could say she was just a spirit in a shell, and reincarnate her, but it wouldn't be the same. Even if I found a character with her exact personality, it wouldn't be the same.
Despite my big blocks of text and flowery vocabulary, I really am still an fledgling RPer at the core. This is going to be my first time killing anybody off. Just thinking about it is hurting me. So...what do I do? Is there anything I can do to at least numb the pain? What is the method to killing off a character gracefully? Or is there a deathless solution I could use instead?