Take A Favourite Game And Make It Sound Awful.

[Hercynia]

Pray to RNGesus. Story-wise: Space Ninjas' find out space-mom is really an AI they were designed to kill that has reformed, so now they MASSACRE TRILLIONS for her while normal people are oppressed by the space-bank and space-Military and an evil space-infection consumes everything.


-Warframe.

 

[Myxyzptlk]

Submerse yourself in the polluted city of Los Santos! Where hentai is considered a childrens cartoons and everything is a parody! Entice yourself by slaughtering down random citizens on the street for the sake of trying to get five stars! And if that's not enough to keep you playing longer you can perform the same heist over and over so you can profit off of other people's money while you leave them bankrupt for the rest of their forgetful lives!!!


~ Grand Theft Auto Five.

 

[Khadame]

It's easier being elected as President of the USA than completing this goddamn game.


- Takeshi's Challenge

 

[Mordecai]

You should probably just keep shooting.


-Borderlands

 

[UmbreonRogue]

Catch random monsters and go through repeated grindfests to stand a chance against Gym Leaders to be given a piece of metal and a disc, and access the use of field moves that you wouldn't be able to otherwise. And perhaps fight an Eldritch Abomination in an alternate world where you get lost in easily. You keep up the grindfests until you fight one of the hardest bosses in the main series, AKA the champion of Sinnoh.


~Pokemon Platinum

 

[SimpleGuy]

Jump


-Every Mario game ever

 

[Farseer of Ulthwe]

Kill an extremely powerful higher vampire while fighting his army of vampiric monsters, beat Evil Incarnate at His own game and defeat a cultists of wraiths. Then proceed to jump the stairs and die.


~ The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt


Take cover behind a thick wall only to have a single enemy bullet go through a number of his allies (without harming them), then phasing through the wall and kill you instantly.


~ Rainbow Six: Vegas 2

 

[Cyaness]

You play as a kid who journeys around the region in a world where enslaving strange monsters and pitting them against each other in fights is commonplace. Evil organizations attempt to do stuff and police only occasionally try to stop them, but in the end, you and your monster slaves/buddies are the only ones competent enough to stop the evil.


- Pretty much every main Pokémon game.


Bunny witch plays Tetris.


- Irisu Syndrome


(The next few are pretty much all for one game)


Mediocre voice acting encompasses a tale of revenge as you set out to avenge your sensei and the rest of your martial arts school, who were killed after an attack that was helped by a turncoat from said school. Along the way, you team up with martial artists who are all each the sole survivor of the same attack (and some other people, of course).


- Blade & Soul


Your pet cat is stronger than you.


- Playing as a Summoner in Blade & Soul


"BLOCKED!"


- Blade & Soul


"Deflected!"


- Blade & Soul

 

[Khadame]

Ice levels.


- Pokemon: Diamond/Pearl

 

[Captifate]

Pick cutscenes out of order over and over again between different characters until the story finally makes sense.


- Zero Time Dilemma

 

[Sirca]

Shield wars.


- Every Super Smash Bros

 

[Impocractes]

Die over and over again trying to prove you are the chosen one, only to end up setting yourself on fire and burning for all eternity.


-Dark souls

 

[Ammokkx]

Turtle for twenty goddamn minutes in the slowest Lego building party of your life all while you make your fingers bleed by mashing the keyboard, only to then still die out because you messed up your build order. Agonize over those long-ass Black Forest maps where your opponent build a seemingly impenetrable defense and you're slowly being choked out of gold as they got to the Castle Age faster and snatched all the relics. Fail to do anything in Arabia as your Town Center is razed within the first twelve minutes by some bullshit Hun militia rush.


-Age of Empires II

 

[Username]

"Man Oversleeps, Misses Battle. Decides to walk around city and kill illegal aliens"


-Halo 3: ODST

 

[Trust]

Pokemon - walk around and do animal abuse


Dark souls 1,2&3 - I wonder if there are invisble walls in this ga- YOU DIED

 

[atomic]

Turtle for twenty goddamn minutes in the slowest Lego building party of your life all while you make your fingers bleed by mashing the keyboard, only to then still die out because you messed up your build order. Agonize over those long-ass Black Forest maps where your opponent build a seemingly impenetrable defense and you're slowly being choked out of gold as they got to the Castle Age faster and snatched all the relics. Fail to do anything in Arabia as your Town Center is razed within the first twelve minutes by some bullshit Hun militia rush.
-Age of Empires II

first off, i freaking lived on this game when i was a child. basically taught me everything i ever needed to know about world history and empires




now, spend the first twenty minutes dodging a pompous ass of an emperor before it stops being fun. watch the idiot pompous emperor die. watch more people die. go to hell and back and do this about twenty thousand more times until every bloody city has you bent over as their personal bitch. go back into the BIGGEST hell and out again. save the world and get some lame ass armor while some other douchebag gets to run the country. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! Get watched while you sleep. Join questionable cults. Steal shit. go to a super a duper elite mages club and learn absolutely nothing because everybody and their mother asks you to solve their problems. feeling 'bipolar'? dont worry, there's an entire expansion pack that cares about your needs. contract a disease that gives you a craving for blood even though its honestly, the worst. steal horses. run away from paranoid citizens. chase after crazy lizard people that go "ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni". become a grand champion only to be awarded a crappy yellow haired fungus that may or may not only serve a purpose to be flung off the highest peak in... still don't know? the highest peak in Cyrodil.


Ladies and gentleman, Elder Scrolls: Oblivion - my heart and soul goes out to you

 

[DikkeVetteVlinder]

Dredge through layers upon layers of snow, fight off more obnoxious wolves than anything and be prepared to be talked down by practically anyone and their dog. You also get to choose between two armies that both have enough assholes in them that they both make you just want to flip 'm the bird.


- Skyrim

 

[Fishman Lord]

Spend hours upon hours looking through family trees for a bride, desperately checking for genetic traits and fertility bonuses while simultaneously trying to avoid accidental incest due to the countless times you've done this already so now everyone is related to you. All the while, spend more time waiting for your mentally challenged chancellor to fabricate a claim while your vassals despise you for being a weakling as your empire built over centuries slowly crumbles, and to top it all off, when things finally seem to be looking up, get Zerg rushed by fucking goddamn ahistorical fucking Aztecs. And also pay 20 dollars anytime you want a good feature, plus 2 dollars anytime you want the game to look slightly better because paradox is worse than the fucking sims when it comes to DLC.


-Crusader Kings 2

 

[Trust]

Dredge through layers upon layers of snow, fight off more obnoxious wolves than anything and be prepared to be talked down by practically anyone and their dog. You also get to choose between two armies that both have enough assholes in them that they both make you just want to flip 'm the bird.
- Skyrim

(Stormcloaks, Stormcloaks everytime...)

 

[UmbreonRogue]

I almost joined the Imperials, then my friend convinced me to join the Stormcloaks.


I still think that the Stormcloaks are the biggest buttholes in the game.


Run around at a snail's pace through a story which really gets boring after you decide to murder every single soul, and get called a piece of cancer for simply liking it. ~Undertale


Try to catch random monsters in the real world, which really doesn't work half the time because of overloaded servers. Oh yeah, and people in bigger cities get more diverse Pokemon than the rural folks. ~Pokemon GO!

 

[BlueLink9001]

(Man, Screw the Imperials, Stormcloaks every time.)


Hit giant Eyeballs on monsters and push blocks


-The Legend of Zelda Series

 

[Swindle]

Play as a mean-spirited rat man and his naive but intelligent trashcan backpack using a variety of weapons that hardly look like they could really function (but they look cool tho) on a quest to meet the mean-spirited rat-man's childhood hero even though the real plot point is about rampant capitalism literally destroying worlds. In the end, the rat man isn't so mean-spirited anymore after seeing firsthand the evils of capitalism.


Ratchet and Clank (the original, not the dirty remake)

 

[Alator]

Chase the frightened girl/woman you practically raised across a continent.


- The Witcher 3

 

[Dolches]

Force creatures to be your pet and experience Stockholm syndrome, travel a region and beat up everybody else's pets, beat up the pets of the members of a generic evil organization which sometimes has an impossible dream that they need a strong Pokemon to achieve, and then beat up your friends' and random strangers' pets.


- Pokemon (All of them.)


Spend an hour or two beating up normal enemies that can still kill you, and then get absolutely destroyed by the boss of that place.


- Etrian Odyssey (All of them and the spin-off series.)


Kill monsters over three times your size over and over again to get new armor and weapons, then repeat the process again with a bigger and stronger monster. Then after you kill every monster, wait a year or more to be able to repeat the process with more monsters.


- Monster Hunter (All of them including the spin-offs and Japan exclusive games.)

 

[Username]

Actually Just an intense Episode of undercover Boss


- Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic