Take A Favourite Game And Make It Sound Awful.

A road trip with product advertisement and placement, with a 2000 year old man leading you into you sacrificing yourself to achieve his goal.

-Final Fantasy XV
 
Toilets, Pooping, Real world disgusting references, loud bunny rabbits screaming a lot along with Italian people, a dinosaur lizard thing, a Princess who has a bad attitude at times, along with guns, grenade rubber duckies, moving bombs, hammers, clubs, and with special abilities like staring an enemy down and killing them when they decide to move an inch. Oh, and let's not forget the big warm hole that is destroying an entire kingdom.

- Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle for Nintendo Switch
 
Play an unforgiving God as you watch apathetic bearded men carve out a mountain for rocks only to get killed by demons, Elves, or their own apathy.
- Dwarf Fortress

Play an unforgiving God as you watch your subjects and their precious miniatures be devoured by a gelatinous cube.
- Dungeons and Dragons

Build your own nation, have your one unit killed by barbarians, pump out all the science, get angry at the Welsh, destroy everything only to get nuked by Gandhi. Then watch as Polynesia scores a Cultural Victory.
-Sid Meier's Civilization 5

You suck at this game. No really. You do.
-Super Smash Bros Melee

Race a massive field of cars as your snarky Chief and apathetic Spotter try to ensure your car doesn't blow up.
- NASCAR Thunder 2004

Learn that the game is easy when you use magic, until you get invaded by some guy with a Scraping Spear, and get 2scraped.
-Demon's Souls

Learn that the game is easy when you use magic, only to get invaded by a save editor who kills you in one hit.
- Dark Souls

Everything is viable, but you still lose to people who found a Monastery Scimitar.
- Dark Souls 2

If you weren't a blood fetishist before, you are now.
- Bloodborne

Have fun invading, getting ganked by 4 people at once who taunt you afterwards.
- Dark Souls 3

Where did all the cool moves go?
- Every WWE game from SvR 2009 onwards.

Dark Souls, but 2D and Turn Based.
- Darkest Dungeon
 
Finding as many ways to kill a likable version of a 'Despicable Me' minion as possible, using only what you could find at the scrapyard down the road from Kennedy Space Center. Then installing enough mods to make a PC Skyrim player do a double take so the game actually has some depth.

-KSP.
 
You think you're going to be playing a british twat for the entire game, in the mind of an American (but end up playing as the son). His friend is totally gay for him, but the friend doesn't know that said british twat fornicated with the natives, so friend burns village. Son becomes a buff body builder (Yet, can still climb trees?). Entire game, son screws with dad and dad's friend while an American whos like 1 percent every race watches because he's looking for an ancient artifact. Son and father go on trips, entire trips consist of sassy son being a sarcastic little bugger, and dad wondering why he didn't just kill him as he struggles to pronounce his name.


Assassin's Creed: III
 
Enter a crumbling and desperate world then proceed to harass the citizens, run around like a maniac, steal from warrior villages, and beat the shit out of severely ill denizens who wander around as they get down with the sickness. There's also a part where you go fight a shit beetle in a room full of shit.

-Hollow Knight.
 
Make a beautiful solar powered rocket to go to mars just for it to be shown up by a trashcan with booster rockets glued to it.

KSP
 
Train animals to fight terrorists.
-Pokemon series

What if you could race Nascar and street cars against Formula 1 on a Rallycross course?
-Project Cars

Dakka: The Game
-Touhou

Backstab Simulator, now in 4K!
-Dark Souls Remastered

If court cases were anime
-Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

Big Smoke creates memes.
-Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Hack apart helpless civilians as they try to fix your electricity problem.
-Dead by Daylight

A cowboy and a bird are the best characters.
-Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Heritage for the Future

De way is paved with the spit of the nonbelievers.
-VRChat

Weeaboo Souls
-Nioh

Girls choose combat as a profession despite obvious chronic back pain caused by their large breasts
-Dead or Alive series
 
You have the power to put almost everything into existance, but have to help people with their petty problems
-Super Scribblenauts

Tomodachi Life but you have to kill faces
- Miitopia
 
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I've done this ominous backstory-telling too many times.
So, the Earth goes to shit and all the land-lubbers are dead.
So sea-dwellers evolve to take their place. You know, squids and octopi. No, not tentacle porn, believe it or not.
So, the past repeats itself and now the squids and octopi are ironically fighting for land instead of living in the water. We don't know why though. In-game we see plenty of buildings above water, why was there a war?
Anyway, the lazy shits (squid people) are about to lose the war when someone pulls the plug on the octopi's weapons. Those lazy little shits pull a victory and, as history dictates, condemned the octopus-people for the rest of time.
Now the octopus-people are pissed. So what do they do? They steal the great Zapfish!

Yeah, it's Splatoon.

Alright, so the Octarians are pissed again so they stole the Zapfish again. It's the same game as the previous one, except you're not very cultured, but Marie guesses you'll have to do.
Splatoon 1.5! (Splatoon 2)
 
Wake up, use bathroom, make breakfast, burn breakfast, eat burnt breakfast, go to work, come home, cry alone in your living room because no one loves you, eat a snack, watch TV, go to bed, repeat, come home, go for a midnight dip in the new pool, wait, where's the ladder?

- The Sims
 
Stardew Valley: Inherit property, realize it is awful, spend the rest of your life tending to it.

Legend Of Zelda: Wind Waker: "So what should the next game be" "90% of the time should be spent in a boat"

Legend of Zelda: Breath Of The Wild: Let the world and everyone struggle by sleeping 100 years. Then let it struggle as you walk around and cook food.
 
Yell really loudly and people think you're some sort of hero/legend, but still treat you like crap, until you decide to mod the game and kill everyone.

Get married only to use your spouse for either money and food, an achievement, or certain questionable mods.

"Sleeveless Vikings in the snow with horny hats everywhere!"

-Skyrim
 
You find a set of power armor and jump from the highest point in the map then just walk it off like it was nothing. You experience 3000g's of force and yet you still don't F**KING DIE!!?? ON TOP OF THAT THE GAME CLAIMS TO HAVE FUCKING REALISTIC PHYSICS!!!!!


-Fallout 4
 
Entire Jak and Daxter game plot and ending in two sentences. You have been warned.
Main Character #2 turns into a rodent then goes on a quest with Main Character #1 to get changed back. Doesn't get changed back.
 
BunnyDemon BunnyDemon I love it when in the end, the main characters just kind of forget why they're here and never get what they originally wanted. You can play the beginning after finishing and go, "Wow! I forgot this was a tense partnership between two rivals so they could plot device plot device when in the end no such thing was even considered!"
 
Try to do things normally but then inevitably drive on the sidewalks and try to kill all innocent people, commit crimes just to shoot and blow up the first responders, and kill hookers to take back your money after having a good time in your car at the beach.

-- GTA V
 
I think OrenjiGatsu OrenjiGatsu Will like this one

Slowly build a solid kingdom for about 50 years, only to have a brain dead heir take over. Then you begin inbreeding your family because no one will marry you, and finally you begin to get gangbanged by everyone around you and by multiple barbarian tribes until some viking shits take you over and cause boarder gore!

-CK2

Oh and we have $220 worth of DLC, ranging from Sunset invasion to unit packs!
 
You find a set of power armor and jump from the highest point in the map then just walk it off like it was nothing. You experience 3000g's of force and yet you still don't F**KING DIE!!?? ON TOP OF THAT THE GAME CLAIMS TO HAVE FUCKING REALISTIC PHYSICS!!!!!


-Fallout 4
Umm... not to burst your bubble, but I seriously can NOT think of ANY Bethesda Game that made THAT claim. xD
 

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