C o r r u p t i o n ~

[h2h0e]

So someone shares a wish.

Then the next person grants the wish, but corrupts it.

For example:

"I wish I had a car."

"Wish granted, but is has no engine."​

I will start.
I wish I had money.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

You will have money, but you will have to work 12 hours a day at minimum wage to survive for the next decade.

I really wish my sunflowers would bloom faster.

 

[Axel The Englishman]

You sunflowers will bloom twice as fast, but their lifespan is cut by half.

I wish I could go to the Red Planet.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

While you do get to the Red Planet, its inhabitants are hostile and breathe fire, so they drive you out after ten minutes.

I wish minimum wage was higher.

 

[Derpy Dev]

Granted, but then robots become cheaper and easier to maintain. You get fired and replaced with Rachaelbot.

I wish I had a cloned duplicate of myself.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

You will get that clone, but he hates your guts and is always trying to off you or ruin your life.
I wish the person next to me would stop yelling.

 

[Axel The Englishman]

The person stops yelling at you. The instead express their emotions by violently slapping you across the face.

I wish for an original, dank meme.

 

[Roxasarass]

You may have an original dank meme, but it immediately becomes stolen by someone and they posted it then got credit for it.



I wish for boredom to leave me.

 

[Hall Kervean]

You may have an original dank meme, but it immediately becomes stolen by someone and they posted it then got credit for it.



I wish for boredom to leave me.

Your boredom will leave you, but it's because your life is at risk.

I wish for an honest living.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

You get an honest living, but you're serving burgers to large, grumpy orcs who will literally bite your head off if you don't do things exactly as they demand.

I wish my sister would stop trying to walk in my heels. It's annoying when she comes back home with a limp.

 

[Tarmagon]

Granted. Your sister is in an accident that requires both legs to be amputated at the knee.

I wish I lived closer to work.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

Shit; she kind of did get her kneecaps run over by a 4 wheeler once. Somehow still walked away and recovered.

Granted. Your house is crushed to splinters and you are moved closer to work, but your new place has mildew and is haunted by the ghost of a squealing, spoiled three year old.

I wish... I could reverse my most recent wish. My sister needs her legs.

 

[Tarmagon]

Granted. Through a miracle of transplant technology, your sister has her legs restored. However, one is attached backwards.

I wish I could get that squealing ghost exorcised.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

Ugh. It takes so darn long to reverse the direction of a leg.

Granted. The squealing ghost is exorcised. She cries, "But I thought you loved me!" as she is forced to leave. The ghost of a kitten takes her place and scratches you awake every morning.

I wish my brother was a little more careful on his 4-wheeler.

 

[Tarmagon]

Eh. Saves me having to set my alarm clock.

Granted. Your brother becomes a premier stunt rider. As such, he is always extra careful, especially on the regular occasions where he risks his life performing death-defying stunts.

I wish I understood people a little better.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

You understand people better - you have to hear everybody's thoughts all the time. And everybody can hear yours, so you can no longer keep secrets.

I wish my younger brother would brush his hair and learn not to run in the street with his older sister's oversized dresses.

(No offence to guys whose dresses fit them well).

 

[Hall Kervean]

You understand people better - you have to hear everybody's thoughts all the time. And everybody can hear yours, so you can no longer keep secrets.

I wish my younger brother would brush his hair and learn not to run in the street with his older sister's oversized dresses.

(No offence to guys whose dresses fit them well).

Your wish... is granted. His hair will be brushed, however, upon brushing it, it will shrink an inch. And he will no loner wear his older sister's oversized dresses; he will run around with his sister's oversized swimming attire on.

I wish for an invincible helicopter

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

Granted, but you don't know any of the controls and crash on the first flight.

I wish I could stay awake longer.

 

[raindrop]

granted, but you're only going to get an hour of sleep at best.

i wish i didn't procrastinate so much.

 

[Birdsie]

From now on, you will have to work.... That's about it. I don't need to add anymore evil to it, really.

I wish the person below didn't corrupt my wish.

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

Wish granted, but the person think's you're chicken.

I wish I could hide my feelings better.

 

[The Gunrunner]

Wish granted - You don't have feelings.

I wish I knew everything

 

[Rachael of the Shire]

You live long enough to learn everything. But now you are aged, can no longer die, and your life has become meaningless.

I wish I could have my feelings back from that last post.

 

[Hall Kervean]

Granted, but you don't know any of the controls and crash on the first flight.

I wish I could stay awake longer.

Seeing as it's invincible...

You will become an emotional sap, unable to be consoled when a minor side character dies in a movie.

I want to have a soul.

 

[Birdsie]

You now have a soul, however, it was given to you by the Ruinous Powers of Chaos. Now you will become a Chaos Space Marine and will have to serve them for all eternity, slowly destroying the Imperium of Man that you once pledged your loyalty to; proving that you are a dog with no honor. And before you realize it, the Forces of Chaos will betray you for their own endeavours and you will be but a corpse in power armor, rotting on a long-forgotten planet.

I wish I could wish that the person below couldn't have a wish.