• Javik: *Says literally anything*
    Me (and Probably Commander Shepard): I need to stop taking you places.
    • The "Start Your Own" Law: As a member posts about a grievance they have with a community or offers valid, constructive feedback, the probability that at least one of the replies consists of nothing else but "just make your own forum" or "leave if you don't like it" approaches 1.
    Regardless of whether you have positive or negative thoughts on Christopher Columbus, it should be acknowledged that he never actually landed on the American continent.
    "Credits are no good around here. I need something real."

    You know, except for literally every other time anyone ever buys something on this stupid planet, where they use credits.
    Good morning. Happy Independence Day to my fellow Americans. And you know what, happy Independence Day to the brits too, just to annoy them.
    Mass Effect 2 is a game that teaches you that among the many tasks you preform to save the galaxy and make it a better place, none will ever be as important as feeding your fish.
    Recently I learned that Viridi has the same Japanese VA as Kirby. So if you understand Japanese and want to hear what Kirby would sound like if he was a plant obsessed tsundere, go buy and play a Japanese copy of Kid Icarus: Uprising.
    Oh boy. This whole light mode v dark mode thing can't end well. I wonder if I should sell out my services as a mercenary.
    New York City: Where aliens could invade and nobody would even notice.
    At this point I feel like humanity might be better off if aliens just took over everything right now
    For creatures supposedly beyond our understanding, the Reapers sure do spout a lot of entry level nihilism.
    Youtuber: *Makes video of poor quality*
    Video: *Doesn't get 100,000 views*
    Youtuber: This is clearly the algorithm's fault.
    • The Laugh Out Loud Law: 50% of users who end their sentences in "lol" are doing so condescendingly. The other 50% are completely genuine. It is, unfortunately, very difficult to distinguish between these two groups.
    • "Where did my post go?" Law: As the length of a draft post approaches infinity, the likelihood of the draft being deleted, either due to a forum glitch or the user clicking a wrong button, approaches one. As a result the final product will be shorter and less thought out than the original draft as the user is incapable of remembering everything they wrote.
    Jehovahs witnesses are like vampires, they can't come in unless you invite them.
    Britain is basically that guy who visits your house all friendly like and then proceeds to completely trash it.
    How about a show about a family of soap bars having to deal with all sorts of drama. It'll be a soap opera.
    • Meme Effort Equation: For a typical person, the likelihood of a meme in becoming popular can be modeled using the parabola y = [(4+(x-3)^2)0.1] / 4, where x is a number from 0 to 9 representing the effort put to the meme. Zero-effort memes have an approximately 32.5% of getting noticed, while a very high effort meme will almost certainly get noticed. Most memes will fall under a 2 or 3 in the effort scale.
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