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    • The Law of Mastery Jealousy:
      • For any thread pertaining to a video which demonstrates an impressive mastery of a skill and/or game, as the thread grows longer, the probability of a post insulting the performer and instigating that he/she must have no life approaches one. Approximately 97% of the time, the post will also be evidence that the poster should enroll in remedial English classes.
      • Corollary: Ironically, such a post will only prove that the poster has no life, because (a) nobody wants to hang out with an obnoxious jerk, and (b) why else would they have nothing better to do than to post such pointless comments?
    • The Law of Fakery:
      • Anything fake which attracts enough attention will have some people vehemently proclaiming it's real. Anything real which attracts enough attention will have some people vehemently proclaiming it's fake.
      • Corollary: If the creator confesses that it was fake, some people will stillclaim it's real and call the confession a fake.
    • Poe's Law:
      • Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humour, it is impossible to create a parody of anything that someone won't mistake for the real thing.
      • Corollary: Sufficiently advanced trolling is indistinguishable from genuine stupidity.
    • Scopie's Law:
      • In any discussion involving science or medicine, citing Whale.to as a credible source loses you the argument immediately.
      • Corollary: Doing so gets you laughed out of the room.
    • Okuu's Law:
      • As the length of a discussion on nuclear power approaches infinity, the probability of Chernobyl and/or a hyperbolic apocalyptic scenario being invoked approaches 1.
      • First Corollary: The probability of Chernobyl being invoked as an apocalyptic scenario also approaches 1 (albeit at a slower rate), despite the fact that life still exists in Ukraine after the Chernobyl disaster.
      • Second Corollary: The probability of a comparison to Hiroshima and/or Nagasaki as an apocalyptic scenario also approaches 1, in spite of the fact that nuclear reactors cannot possibly produce an atomic-bomb-like explosion.
      • Third Corollary: Unless the forum is based on a related topic (e.g. physics, nuclear physics, science in general), the less a user knows about physics, the more likely they are to start such a thread.
    • Godwin's Law:
      • As the length of a thread approaches infinity, the probability of a comparison involving Adolf Hitler or the Nazis approaches 1.
      • Corollary: Outside of a small number of specific topics (for example, discussion of the British National Party), making such a comparison automatically loses the debate.
      • Noob Corollary: The alternative to Hitler and Nazis is to call opponents "noobs". While this doesn't usually cause the user to instantly lose the argument, there's a decent chance they're not going to win anyway (moreso if they invoke this when calling someone a noob makes no sense).
    • "Less is the new Black" Principle: If a user who is notable and active on one forum registers for another related forum with the same username, their profile on the second forum will usually lack numerous entries such as a signature, avatar, or location. The chance of this is inversely proportional to their activity on the related forum.
    When you're in an argument and growing hopelessly bored:
    official clown business
    official clown business
    I'm curious to see if the Ashen Wolves will be anywhere near as memeworthy as the students above them. I suppose we'll find out soon, won't we?
    BackSet
    BackSet
    Shh. I'm pretending I don't know who those are so I can avoid spoilers. It's working out pretty well, actually. I have managed to completely blank my mind of spoilery stuff.
    • Public Icon Effect: If a notable member of the community changes their screen name, signature, or (especially) their avatar after a very long period of not doing so, an uproar of confusion will be caused among the community and several others will suggest that the user return things to the way they were.
    • Like
    Reactions: Daisie
    Daisie
    Daisie
    Can confirm. This exact thing happened when I briefly mentioned that I was considering a name change.
    Fun fact: one out of every three people is secretly a spider.
    Idea
    Idea
    Welp, we’ve been found, time for another purge.
    • Name Change Cascade:
      • If a notable member of the community changes their screen name once, they will usually do it again in the future.
      • There is a significant likelihood that the second name change will be the user changing their name back to their original name or something similar to it, due to the Public Icon Effect.
      • If it is in a forum where name changes are given relatively freely and easily, and if a new season or series comes out, and if at least one member of the staff changes their name to something related to this new series, there is a high chance at least half the members of the board will change their user names to something related to the series as well.
    • Custom Title Desecration Axiom: On a board which hands out free custom titles, there will always be at least one user who sets their title to something that cannot, by any stretch of the definition, be called a "rank" or a "title". 60% Of these off-topic ranks will be internet memes.
    (I can't help but feel personally attacked by this one)
    • Location Axiom: There is always another clever location field entry that you haven't seen yet.
    • The Internship Principle: The longer a community-driven site exists, the less welcoming (and interesting) it becomes for new members to get involved with. As a community accumulates its own backlog of history, rules (both written and unwritten), members and their respective reputations, and inside jokes, the more new members are expected to conform to the already-existing community environment rather than bringing their own ideas to the table, and the less likely new members will be willing to accept the tradeoff between obligation and fun.
    • Unused Equipment Request Procedure: If announcing on a MMORPGforum that they are leaving the game, especially in anger, there will be at least one response of 'can I have your stuff?'. Also, they will never actually quit.
    • The Reverse Boomerang Law: If a user comes back after an extended hiatus from a forum with a lengthy "I'm back" post, the user will almost certainly leave immediately again. The length of the post is directly proportional to their likelihood of disappearing forever — this is because, the more promises the user makes in this post, the more they will feel ashamed of them and wish to run away from them forever. See also the Nail in the Coffin Law.
    • CAD's Boomerang Law: If an active user creates a post announcing they are voluntarily leaving the community, they will almost certainly return. The length of the post is directly proportional to their likelihood of returning and inversely proportional to the time it will take for them to return. However, if an active user suddenly disappears without announcing themselves, and it was not because they were banned, the chances of them returning are much less, let alone the chances of them being remembered outside of the occasional "hey, what ever happened to MacGuffin?"
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