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Funnier President Funnier President TheAceInTheDeck TheAceInTheDeck Ace Cream Ace Cream I shall now formally inform you all that Neo Alice Neo Alice has left the RP, and Huntertabbysandshark3 Huntertabbysandshark3 will be taking her place with thier own character (which has yet to be put up). The sisters are now considered to be spies for Ace Cream Ace Cream to use as they please (though they have currently been escorted off the scene). Amaya Itami Amaya Itami Also declared that I will be acting as a Co-GM in terms of management to keep things fair and balanced for all so feel free to direct any questions (not story related) or complaints my way.
 
Funnier President Funnier President TheAceInTheDeck TheAceInTheDeck Ace Cream Ace Cream I shall now formally inform you all that Neo Alice Neo Alice has left the RP, and Huntertabbysandshark3 Huntertabbysandshark3 will be taking her place with thier own character (which has yet to be put up). The sisters are now considered to be spies for Ace Cream Ace Cream to use as they please (though they have currently been escorted off the scene). Amaya Itami Amaya Itami Also declared that I will be acting as a Co-GM in terms of management to keep things fair and balanced for all so feel free to direct any questions (not story related) or complaints my way.
GM approved :33:
 
Huntertabbysandshark3 Huntertabbysandshark3 Since you're clover perhaps the golems you have are sentient plants you can grow into golems? Just trying to think of how this works as making golems from anything might infringe on other characters.
 
Huntertabbysandshark3 Huntertabbysandshark3 Since you're clover perhaps the golems you have are sentient plants you can grow into golems? Just trying to think of how this works as making golems from anything might infringe on other characters.
Sure I left it vauge for working on thing plants may work the that would just be treants was thinking more just stone rock and soil maybe some plant mixed in like bone/tendons around the rock body or something like that
 
Sure I left it vauge for working on thing plants may work the that would just be treants was thinking more just stone rock and soil maybe some plant mixed in like bone/tendons around the rock body or something like that
Well it can just be plants that grew around things for armor so yeah that works
 
...

i've been absent for a quite a while it seems

ok now...


w h a t t h e h e c k i s g o i n g o n
 
Funnier President Funnier President TheAceInTheDeck TheAceInTheDeck Ace Cream Ace Cream I shall now formally inform you all that Neo Alice Neo Alice has left the RP, and Huntertabbysandshark3 Huntertabbysandshark3 will be taking her place with thier own character (which has yet to be put up). The sisters are now considered to be spies for Ace Cream Ace Cream to use as they please (though they have currently been escorted off the scene). Amaya Itami Amaya Itami Also declared that I will be acting as a Co-GM in terms of management to keep things fair and balanced for all so feel free to direct any questions (not story related) or complaints my way.
:(
 
Soap tips.
Things you can do with soap, or ways to use soap.
Buy soap.
Get it from the store, or just rent it.
Take it home, wash your house!
Invite some friends over, talk about soap. They're not interested in soap. That's too bad!
Move to Canada. You can wash Canada! Nope, it's already clean.


I wonder if soap comes from the natural process of evolution, or if it was a gift from God?


NARRATOR: Knock knock, it's the soap gods!
SOAP GODS: Quick survey about the soap:
How are you liking the soap so far?

NARRATOR: It's okay.
SOAP GODS: That's good. We're gonna make more of it, except you will like it more because it will taste better and be more addictive.

Let's go to Africa and find love in the jungle!

Found it! I also found some soap.

Part 2. Advanced Techniques.
Teleport some soap. Teleport yourself and leave the soap where it is.
Try this one: You can walk 100 miles and the soap will be there when you get there because you sent it through the postal system.

I wonder what would happen if you took soap and combined it with soap and merged their properties and characteristics? It's something to think about.
 
i have a duolingo song stuck in my head

its bad yet intriguing.
 
i'm investigating something

let me just copy and paste something big............
 
ignore the links

i can't be bothered to remove them

NARRATOR: Hi, you're on a rock floating in space. Pretty cool, huh? Some of it's water. Fuck it, actually, most of it's water. I can't even get from here to there without buying a boat.

A plane is shown flying from South America to Africa. The plane fades off the screen, and a lone, sad stick figure is shown standing on Africa.

NARRATOR: It's sad. I'm sad. I miss you.

The camera pans left across the globe to show more sad stick figures also standing on South America, North America, and Europe.

CHORUS: How did this happen?

NARRATOR: A long time ago- Actually, never, and also now, nothing is nowhere. When? Never. Makes sense, right? Like I said, it didn't happen. Nothing was never anywhere. That's why it's been everywhere. It's been so everywhere, you don't need a where. You don't even need a when. That's how "every" it gets.

A long pause happens.

NARRATOR: Forget this. I wanna be something. Go somewhere. Do something. I want things to change. I want to invent time and space, and I know it's possible because everything is here, and it probably already happened. I just don't know when to start, and that's exactly where it started.

The sound of VCR fast forwarding plays.

NARRATOR: Ooh, I paused it. I think there's a universe now. What's it made of?

CHORUS: Quarks and stuff!

NARRATOR: Ah, that's a thing, in a place. Don't like it? Try a new place, at a different time. Try to stick together because the world is gonna get bigger and emptier, but it's not empty yet. It's still very full and about a kjghpillion degrees.

About no seconds pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The quarks are now happily married and in groups of three, called a proton or a neutron, and there's something else floating around too that wants to join in but can't because it's still too-
An explosion goes off while the screen says, "HOT."

10 minutes pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The protons and neutrons are now happily married to each other. Some of them even doubled up.

About 380,000 years pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The electrons have now joined in. Congratulations! The world is now a bunch of gas in space, but it's getting closer together...
10 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...and it's getting closer together...
500 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...and it's getting closer toget-
An explosion occurs.
CHORUS: It's a star!


NARRATOR: New shit just got made. Some stars burn out and die. Bigger stars burn out and die with passion, and make some brand new, way crazier shit...
CHORUS: Space dust!
NARRATOR: ...which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into-
CHORUS: Even crazier space dust!


NARRATOR: ...so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things, like this ball of flaming rocks for example.

NARRATOR: Holy shit! We just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks, and it kind of made a mess, which is-
CHORUS: Now the Moon!


The year is now -4,000,000,000.

NARRATOR: Weather update, it's raining rocks from outer space.

NARRATOR: Weather update, those rocks might have had water inside them, and now, there's hot steam in the sky.

NARRATOR: Weather update, cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava.

NARRATOR: Weather update, it's raining.
NARRATOR: Severe flooding alert! The entire world is now an ocean.


NARRATOR: Volcano alert!
CHORUS: That's land!


OCEAN: (Mumbles) There's life in the ocean.

NARRATOR: What?

CHORUS: Something's alive in the ocean.
IMMATERIAL OBSERVER (IO): Oh, cool. Like, a plant or an animal?
The camera zooms in on a single-cell organism.
NARRATOR: No, a microscopic speck
. It lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup which is being served hot and fresh, made from gnarly space ingredients leftover from when it was raining rocks or whatever.

The cell divides.
NARRATOR: Oh, yeah, and it can do that.
Those cells divide many more times.
NARRATOR: It has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself. So that's pretty nifty, I would say.


NARRATOR: Tired of living at the bottom of the ocean?
CHORUS: Now you can eat sunlight!
The year is now -3,000,000,000.
NARRATOR: Using a revolutionary technique, you can convert sunlight into food.
CHORUS: Taste the sun!


The year is now -2,300,000,000.

NARRATOR: Side effect, now there's oxygen everywhere and the sky is blue. Then the Earth might have been a snowball for a while. Maybe even a couple of times.

The year is now -500,000,000.

NARRATOR: It's a sponge. It's a plant. It's a worm, and some other types of weird, strange water bugs and strange fish.

CHORUS: It's the Cambrian explosion!
IO: Wow, that's animals and stuff.


SEA LIFE: But we're still in the ocean. Hey, can we go on land?
CHORUS, as LAND: No!
SEA LIFE: Why?
CHORUS, as LAND:
The sun is a deadly lazer!

SEA LIFE: Oh, okay.

CHORUS: Not anymore, there's a blanket.

NARRATOR: Now the animals can go on land. Come on animals, let's go on land.

FISH: Nope, can't walk yet. And there's no food yet, so I don't care.

100 million years pass.

LAND: Okay, will you learn to walk if there's plants up here?
SOME BUGS AND FISH: Maybe
NARRATOR: ...said some bugs
... and fish.

The year is now -380,000,000. FISH grunts because it is struggling to get on land, for it has no legs. 5 million years pass. The year is now -375,000,000. FISH now has legs, for it has evolved into an AMPHIBIAN.

AMPHIBIAN: Okay, so I can go on land, but I have to go back in the water to-
CHORUS: Have babies!


The word "idea" flashes on to the screen.

NARRATOR: Learn to use an egg.
AMPHIBIAN: I was already doing that.


NARRATOR: Use a stronger egg. Put water in it. Have a baby, on land, in an egg. Water is in the egg. Baby, in the egg, in the water, in the egg.

The year is -312,000,000.

AMPHIBIAN OFFSPRING: Works for me.

CHORUS: Bye bye, ocean!

50 million years pass.

NARRATOR: And now everything's huge. Including bugs. Wanna see a map of the land?

IO: Sure.

The year is now -252,000,000. A globe is presented. The camera starts to pan around it when a large explosion happens, destroying a land mass on the globe the size of a continent. Text pops onto the screen reading "PERMIAN EXTINCTION." The Permian Extinction has occurred.

NARRATOR: Oh fuck, now everything's dead. Just kidding, here are the survivors.

The thrinaxodon, lystrosaurus, and proterosuchus are shown.

NARRATOR: Keep your eye on this one...
The proterosuchus is circled. 75 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...'cause it's about to become the dinosaurs.
Here's another map of the land.

The globe is shown again. It does not yet look like the Earth we know today; many of the continents are in pieces or out of place.

NARRATOR: Yeah, it broke apart. Don't worry about that. It does that all the time.

The year is now -66,000,000.

NARRATOR: Here comes a meteor.
A meteor comes into frame and hits the globe near what is today called Central America.
CHORUS: And the dinosaurs are gone!


NARRATOR: It's mammal time! Here come the mammals; look at those breasts.

The year is now -15,000,000.

NARRATOR: Now, they're gonna dominate the world, and one of them just learned how to grab stuff, and walk.

The year is now -4,000,000. A transition from one of human's older ancestors to one of human's younger ancestors is shown.

NARRATOR: No, like, walk like that, and grab stuff at the same time.

The year is now -3,000,000.

NARRATOR: And bang rocks together to make pointed rocks.

IO: Ouch.

The year is now -1,500,000.

NARRATOR: And set things on fire.

IO: Yeouch.

The year is now -200,000.

NARRATOR: And make crazy sounds with their voice.
CAVEMAN: Gneurshk.
NARRATOR: Which can mean different things.
Via the CAVEMAN's thought bubble, "Gnerushk," is shown to mean, "Hi," "Bye," and, "Can you hand me that rock over there?"
CHORUS: That's a human person!


NARRATOR: And now they're everywhere, almost.

Text pops on to the screen, above the landmass that is today called North America. It reads "not here yet." Humans have not migrated there yet. The year is now -20,000. Text pops on to the screen, between what is today the American state of Alaska and the Russian autonomous okrug (district) of Chukotka. The text reads "ice age." The ice age is occurring, creating a land bridge between the two landmasses.

CHORUS: Ice age!

HUMANS: What? You can walk over here? Cool!

The year is now -10,000.

CHORUS: Not anymore.

HUMANS: Well, I guess we're stuck here now.

NARRATOR: Let's review. There's people on the planet, and they're chasing their food.

HUMAN: Fuck it, time to plant some grass. Look at this. I control the food now. Now, everyone will want to be my friend and live near me. Let's all build houses, except mine is bigger because I own the food. This is great. I wonder if anyone else is doing this.


wow

this just goes on and on


ignore the links
 
ignore the links

i can't be bothered to remove them

NARRATOR: Hi, you're on a rock floating in space. Pretty cool, huh? Some of it's water. Fuck it, actually, most of it's water. I can't even get from here to there without buying a boat.

A plane is shown flying from South America to Africa. The plane fades off the screen, and a lone, sad stick figure is shown standing on Africa.

NARRATOR: It's sad. I'm sad. I miss you.

The camera pans left across the globe to show more sad stick figures also standing on South America, North America, and Europe.

CHORUS: How did this happen?

NARRATOR: A long time ago- Actually, never, and also now, nothing is nowhere. When? Never. Makes sense, right? Like I said, it didn't happen. Nothing was never anywhere. That's why it's been everywhere. It's been so everywhere, you don't need a where. You don't even need a when. That's how "every" it gets.

A long pause happens.

NARRATOR: Forget this. I wanna be something. Go somewhere. Do something. I want things to change. I want to invent time and space, and I know it's possible because everything is here, and it probably already happened. I just don't know when to start, and that's exactly where it started.

The sound of VCR fast forwarding plays.

NARRATOR: Ooh, I paused it. I think there's a universe now. What's it made of?

CHORUS: Quarks and stuff!

NARRATOR: Ah, that's a thing, in a place. Don't like it? Try a new place, at a different time. Try to stick together because the world is gonna get bigger and emptier, but it's not empty yet. It's still very full and about a kjghpillion degrees.

About no seconds pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The quarks are now happily married and in groups of three, called a proton or a neutron, and there's something else floating around too that wants to join in but can't because it's still too-
An explosion goes off while the screen says, "HOT."

10 minutes pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The protons and neutrons are now happily married to each other. Some of them even doubled up.

About 380,000 years pass.

NARRATOR: Great news! The electrons have now joined in. Congratulations! The world is now a bunch of gas in space, but it's getting closer together...
10 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...and it's getting closer together...
500 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...and it's getting closer toget-
An explosion occurs.
CHORUS: It's a star!


NARRATOR: New shit just got made. Some stars burn out and die. Bigger stars burn out and die with passion, and make some brand new, way crazier shit...
CHORUS: Space dust!
NARRATOR: ...which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into-
CHORUS: Even crazier space dust!


NARRATOR: ...so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things, like this ball of flaming rocks for example.

NARRATOR: Holy shit! We just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks, and it kind of made a mess, which is-
CHORUS: Now the Moon!


The year is now -4,000,000,000.

NARRATOR: Weather update, it's raining rocks from outer space.

NARRATOR: Weather update, those rocks might have had water inside them, and now, there's hot steam in the sky.

NARRATOR: Weather update, cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava.

NARRATOR: Weather update, it's raining.
NARRATOR: Severe flooding alert! The entire world is now an ocean.


NARRATOR: Volcano alert!
CHORUS: That's land!


OCEAN: (Mumbles) There's life in the ocean.

NARRATOR: What?

CHORUS: Something's alive in the ocean.
IMMATERIAL OBSERVER (IO): Oh, cool. Like, a plant or an animal?
The camera zooms in on a single-cell organism.
NARRATOR: No, a microscopic speck
. It lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup which is being served hot and fresh, made from gnarly space ingredients leftover from when it was raining rocks or whatever.

The cell divides.
NARRATOR: Oh, yeah, and it can do that.
Those cells divide many more times.
NARRATOR: It has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself. So that's pretty nifty, I would say.


NARRATOR: Tired of living at the bottom of the ocean?
CHORUS: Now you can eat sunlight!
The year is now -3,000,000,000.
NARRATOR: Using a revolutionary technique, you can convert sunlight into food.
CHORUS: Taste the sun!


The year is now -2,300,000,000.

NARRATOR: Side effect, now there's oxygen everywhere and the sky is blue. Then the Earth might have been a snowball for a while. Maybe even a couple of times.

The year is now -500,000,000.

NARRATOR: It's a sponge. It's a plant. It's a worm, and some other types of weird, strange water bugs and strange fish.

CHORUS: It's the Cambrian explosion!
IO: Wow, that's animals and stuff.


SEA LIFE: But we're still in the ocean. Hey, can we go on land?
CHORUS, as LAND: No!
SEA LIFE: Why?
CHORUS, as LAND:
The sun is a deadly lazer!

SEA LIFE: Oh, okay.

CHORUS: Not anymore, there's a blanket.

NARRATOR: Now the animals can go on land. Come on animals, let's go on land.

FISH: Nope, can't walk yet. And there's no food yet, so I don't care.

100 million years pass.

LAND: Okay, will you learn to walk if there's plants up here?
SOME BUGS AND FISH: Maybe
NARRATOR: ...said some bugs
... and fish.

The year is now -380,000,000. FISH grunts because it is struggling to get on land, for it has no legs. 5 million years pass. The year is now -375,000,000. FISH now has legs, for it has evolved into an AMPHIBIAN.

AMPHIBIAN: Okay, so I can go on land, but I have to go back in the water to-
CHORUS: Have babies!


The word "idea" flashes on to the screen.

NARRATOR: Learn to use an egg.
AMPHIBIAN: I was already doing that.


NARRATOR: Use a stronger egg. Put water in it. Have a baby, on land, in an egg. Water is in the egg. Baby, in the egg, in the water, in the egg.

The year is -312,000,000.

AMPHIBIAN OFFSPRING: Works for me.

CHORUS: Bye bye, ocean!

50 million years pass.

NARRATOR: And now everything's huge. Including bugs. Wanna see a map of the land?

IO: Sure.

The year is now -252,000,000. A globe is presented. The camera starts to pan around it when a large explosion happens, destroying a land mass on the globe the size of a continent. Text pops onto the screen reading "PERMIAN EXTINCTION." The Permian Extinction has occurred.

NARRATOR: Oh fuck, now everything's dead. Just kidding, here are the survivors.

The thrinaxodon, lystrosaurus, and proterosuchus are shown.

NARRATOR: Keep your eye on this one...
The proterosuchus is circled. 75 million years pass.
NARRATOR: ...'cause it's about to become the dinosaurs.
Here's another map of the land.

The globe is shown again. It does not yet look like the Earth we know today; many of the continents are in pieces or out of place.

NARRATOR: Yeah, it broke apart. Don't worry about that. It does that all the time.

The year is now -66,000,000.

NARRATOR: Here comes a meteor.
A meteor comes into frame and hits the globe near what is today called Central America.
CHORUS: And the dinosaurs are gone!


NARRATOR: It's mammal time! Here come the mammals; look at those breasts.

The year is now -15,000,000.

NARRATOR: Now, they're gonna dominate the world, and one of them just learned how to grab stuff, and walk.

The year is now -4,000,000. A transition from one of human's older ancestors to one of human's younger ancestors is shown.

NARRATOR: No, like, walk like that, and grab stuff at the same time.

The year is now -3,000,000.

NARRATOR: And bang rocks together to make pointed rocks.

IO: Ouch.

The year is now -1,500,000.

NARRATOR: And set things on fire.

IO: Yeouch.

The year is now -200,000.

NARRATOR: And make crazy sounds with their voice.
CAVEMAN: Gneurshk.
NARRATOR: Which can mean different things.
Via the CAVEMAN's thought bubble, "Gnerushk," is shown to mean, "Hi," "Bye," and, "Can you hand me that rock over there?"
CHORUS: That's a human person!


NARRATOR: And now they're everywhere, almost.

Text pops on to the screen, above the landmass that is today called North America. It reads "not here yet." Humans have not migrated there yet. The year is now -20,000. Text pops on to the screen, between what is today the American state of Alaska and the Russian autonomous okrug (district) of Chukotka. The text reads "ice age." The ice age is occurring, creating a land bridge between the two landmasses.

CHORUS: Ice age!

HUMANS: What? You can walk over here? Cool!

The year is now -10,000.

CHORUS: Not anymore.

HUMANS: Well, I guess we're stuck here now.

NARRATOR: Let's review. There's people on the planet, and they're chasing their food.

HUMAN: Fuck it, time to plant some grass. Look at this. I control the food now. Now, everyone will want to be my friend and live near me. Let's all build houses, except mine is bigger because I own the food. This is great. I wonder if anyone else is doing this.


wow

this just goes on and on


ignore the links
w-what was this lmao
 

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