You Rolled a One!

[Kagura]

Oh shit.
​

So I'm sure we all have our war stories about bad things that happen when you rolled a one and had to deal with the consequences.


I thought it would be fun to share what exactly your character was put through when you critically failed.


To start it off,


I was a swashbuckler stealing from an armory along with my party's thief in dnd 3.5 and despite the urgings of my dm that I didn't need to roll a hide check, I did anyways.


House Rules said skill checks applied to rolling a one... that's exactly what I did.


Unfortunately, there was no 'backsies' to my mistake-


The security system took notice of me (not the thief) and the weapons in the armory flew up and off the walls towards lock-down. Which was unfortunately down the hallway my character was standing in... the weapons in the armory hit her, and after a roll my dm looked up and asked me armor class.


Unfortunately, she was sneaking in there to get her armor...


She died.

 

[The Dark Wizard]

Just yesterday in my new Ravenloft campaign @Miz kept rolling 1s everytime he had to hit and his weapon kept flying out of his hand. He lost like 3-4 weapons in a row.


Good thing he had spare

 

[PirateLexi]

A long time ago in a college far far away, a group of adventurers were trying to sneak past a big 'ol army in Greyhawk. The group rolled and rolled and everyone hit at least a 20 if not a nat 20 on their dice...right up until the cleric rolled. You see, the cleric was of Pelor, and when she rolled a 1, he decided it was a great time to pay a visit and shine his glory down on her and her full plate armor. As in a beam of light. Right on top of her.


Guess how long that battle took?

 

[Action Replay]

Nothing comes to mind when I try to recall myself critically botching. I do have horror stories though of other players...


Was Miz playing a certain unlimited blade works or did he just really like swords?

 

[The Dark Wizard]

[QUOTE="Action Replay]Nothing comes to mind when I try to recall myself critically botching. I do have horror stories though of other players...
Was Miz playing a certain unlimited blade works or did he just really like swords?

[/QUOTE]
No hes a fighter with a favor for many weapons !

 

[Lord-Leafar]

In a short lived Vampire game I was at, I had a La Sombra that was currently in a high speed car chase, when some enemies started shooting explosives at us (can't remember if they were grenades, or grenade launchers, or something else). Being particularly vulnerable to fire I decided to jump out of the moving vehicle to avoid the worst of the explosions, I roll my dice and got no successes with several 1's.


My character ended jumping out of the car only to headbutt the coming explosive mid-air.

 

[Cirno]

In a very fun Homestuck game (ST Umbridled Originality, game system written by Direhuman), I started with a high roll (9 on a d10) against a starting level enemy, an Imp, but subsequent rolls kept going down until I rolled a 1. And the imp, who got a Superman powerup, went from botch botch to wham. She was saved by another character (Seeker of the End) anvilling it with a sofa.

 

[JayTee]

I recently had a double botch concerning a shadow monster that tried had possessed me and tried to exit me via my mouth. was rolling to see how badly I did at maintaining my composure and ended up vomiting everywhere and being in active for several rounds.

 

[Skari-dono]

A player in my first Vampire game (and one of my first games ever) decided it was a good idea for her character to do cartwheels down a set of risky looking stairs. The character broke the stairs, fell through the equally risky stairs below and hit the floor on her back. I never kill a character because of a botch (although the situation they find themselves in can prove to be lethal).

 

[Miz]

Personally there should be more than just throwing your weapon as an option. At the time however we forgot what it was, so we just made it that rule.

[QUOTE="Action Replay]Nothing comes to mind when I try to recall myself critically botching. I do have horror stories though of other players...
Was Miz playing a certain unlimited blade works or did he just really like swords?

[/QUOTE]
The weapons that were lost in Pathfinder as follow:

Horsecleaver Pole-arm


Longsword


Combat Scabbard (functions as a dagger)

The last weapon I was forced to use was a light shield that I shield bashed into enemies. After that I just had unarm.

 

[Unbridled Originality]

In a short-lived Shadowrun game, my decker, who was an entirely unstealthy 350-pound computer geek, had to sneak into a bus depot with our street samurai. He rolled abysmally. which was almost entirely guaranteed to get them caught.


And then the guards rolled a botch, completely missing the big nerd who tripped and fell right in front of him.

 

[Winged Cat]

So there we were, surrounded by hostiles. Orcs to the left, orcs to the right, orcs in front of us, all-slaying fire in the sky, unbreakable stone at our feet, our backs to a wall. Our fighters held off the hordes as best they could but it was a fighting retreat, our mages were spent - and then there was my PC, the cleric. If this wasn't a case for divine intervention he didn't know what was, so he prayed for it...and instantly translated to the presence of his god. It was unclear if the rest of the party's souls came along or had to go the normal, longer and more painful route.


Then there was my orc (on the good side), who tanked a shot for the party, receiving more than twice (it may have been more than three times) the damage needed to kill him:


DM: "You're dead."


Me: "I regenerate!"


DM: "...with what?"


Me: "Sheer orcish stubbornness."


DM: "Roll a 1 to fail to realize you're dead."


Me: *rolls a 1*


He continued to meat shield for the next few sessions until finally completing his duty. (He had been intended as a temporary character, sort of a death seeker.)

 

[Kaerri]

[QUOTE="Winged Cat]Then there was my orc (on the good side), who tanked a shot for the party, receiving more than twice (it may have been more than three times) the damage needed to kill him:
DM: "You're dead."


Me: "I regenerate!"


DM: "...with what?"


Me: "Sheer orcish stubbornness."


DM: "Roll a 1 to fail to realize you're dead."


Me: *rolls a 1*


He continued to meat shield for the next few sessions until finally completing his duty. (He had been intended as a temporary character, sort of a death seeker.)

[/QUOTE]Nice!

 

[Purr]

@Winged Cat That is terrific. =) I swear, sometimes dice have a life of their own.


Honor and fun,


Dann

 

[Winged Cat]

@Winged Cat That is terrific. =) I swear, sometimes dice have a life of their own.

Thanks. And yeah, sometimes you just have to roll with the rolls. There's a reason they are among the common ancient divination methods.

 

[DeusExAlice]

It wasn't exactly a botched roll for my character, but -I- botched my perception of what was going on.


I kinda sorta accidentally turned what was meant to be a subtle and quick investigation to see who was going to and from a particular house into a stakeout/takedown with a little over seventy-five people...against four. All because I thought we were storming the house instead of investigating, followed by a screwed up attempt to dissuade some servile constables from going away.


Dem shifty ghouls in that house messed with the law, and the law won.

 

[Strude]

Trilf is my beloved dwarf fighter, a bit of a dumbass, but most certainly my favorite character. To not she is covered in body hair head to two, most male dwarfs mistake her for a man. She once walked around a ship without pants on and no one could tell the difference. Her body hair is her pride and joy, she says it makes her look beautiful (which it does!)






Trilf:

Guys I'm going to lay down on the ground so you can shoot over me. (says the dwarf who is at least 3 feet shorter than everyone in the group).






Group:

No.






Trilf:

No but guys then you can kill this fire worm.






Group:

Trif, NO.






Trilf:

Guys I'm laying down.






Group:

Trif, we said no.






Trilf:

(to the DM) I lay down on the group so everyone can shoot over me.






DM:

Okay. *quietly snickers*






Group keeps fighting.






DM:

The worm crawls on top of Trilf and lights her on fire.






Group keeps fighting, Trilf is lit on fire repeatedly for several turns.






Trilf:

I'm about to die guys.






Said as she drops below 0 and is asked to do a saving throw. Rolls a one, all her clothing, BELOVED BODY HAIR AND BREAD, and backpack all burn up . . . and she nearing -9 health.




They did manage to kill the fire worm thing and get me to safety. I was hairless, naked, had no armor or bags or items left and was near death . . . but they stabilized me and we went on our way!

 

[Deadkool]

Oh, this isn't a 1 roll story, but a fun d&d story nonetheless


So during my first game, I was set on pi**ing off my DM (who was a close friend of mine) Everyone in the group wants to be seem artsy homebrew character (talking bear, Psychotic bard, etc.) So, I was basically guilted into being a mage so the group didn't fall apart on the first dungeon. I kind of botched up the character creation and after grabbing a card marked 'slimy transmutation' the DM said repeatedly "Put that back. You're not allowed to get that yet. Read the character creation book. That's for level 10+" I grudgingly went along and out of a 1-100 chance, I picked that card as one of my starter spells. Everyone laughed (excluding the DM) and we went along on the campaign. After investigating an abandoned town we 'found' a giant terrorizing it. I slammed slimy transmutation on the table and Poof! Unwinnable fight won in a single move. All of us are about to die of laughter when the DM informs us the giant is back and just crushed the theif's skull. Turns out if the ffog is attacked it resets back to its original form

 

[ARSENIC]

Picture the final battle in a long, ongoing epic. Our party had, after years upon grueling years of torturous sacrifice, accumulated an army large enough to defeat the Godslayer, the face of horror itself, the eldritch, vampiric power who had stolen the quintessense of dozens of divinities, drinking of their powers to amplify his own. His hordes were endless, but our wills were strong. His dragons roared, but our men roared louder. Our spearhead - Eradin the Drakebane, who had severed the head of an elder wyrm in twain with but a single blow of his axe, rides upon his Griffin steed, to the skies, and bellows upon his war horn to signal the charge. It is a deep, echoing, long drone, rumbling through the hearts of men, stirring them to battle. Our DM makes him roll to see how great the effect is upon the men's morale.


And he rolls a one.


The end of the drone is caught in a faintness of breath, and Eradin, First Among Dwarves, the Drakebane, the Stormreaver, Champion of the Thirteen Trials, finds himself ending his war cry with the resounding, embarrassing sound of a shrilly, trembling flatulence. Doubt fills the air. The men's resolve has been shattered, suddenly it dawns on them that they face the insurmountable, the unbeatable. All hope plummets as a terrible, unknowing silence fills the air. It is time for desperate measures.


It is another who rises to the challenge. The arcane and esoteric wizard, for whom even the darkest depths of vile knowledge was but a means to a noble end, watches from behind as his arms rise with the crackle of magic. Zelrynth the Secretkeeper, Unshaper of a Hundred Planes, Binder of a Thousand Demons, Knower of a Million Truths. In seeing the cowardice of his men, he reminds them that the fury of a Godslayer is no match for a Destroyer of Worlds. A wave of fire erupts behind the backline, as his elemental agents pour through - beings of fire and magma, golems of rock and molten iron, stampeding forward in a wave that may only crash by the shores of war. Once again, the DM grants a roll to determine the effect of such terrifying intimidation.


And I roll a one.


At this point the DM just snaps his book shut, and tells us we can either retcon before the two ones or we can just scrap the campaign as a whole because we get fucking decimated. You can imagine which choice we picked.

 

[Shinzah]

I guess my best story has to be while playing a warrior in a D20 3e game.


He'd always had luck on his side throughout the game, once OHK'ing a wyvern after throwing his two handed khopesh at it.


Well, we had a group of about 6 or 7, but only two fighters (a couple of mages, and the rest were rogues)


We journeyed into a volcano under the promise of many riches and came upon a cursed object in a room that had a drop to a lava pit after some tough battles. My character had a change of heart with a situation that was developing with some NPC's and the others and things got heated, eventually he attacked the fighter who was holding the cursed object.


Natural 20'd twice and took his head off after winning the initiative, he fell off the cliff into the lava.


Need to hit the ability check.


Roll a 3. Fall to death.


Both fighters in the party wiped out in one attack turn. Plus the object we all came for.


Wasn't quite a 1, but it was close enough given the whole totally screwing the party.


Only two ever left the volcano after that, and IIRC only one of them had arms :|

 

[Saturnity]

Ahhh the nostalgia of the infamous '1'.


Probably my finest memory is when I was playing with a group of friends after class two years back. Playing what was by far my favorite character of all time, a halfling cleric who wielded a morning star mace and rode into battle on a warhound named Gorf, my friends and were adventuring through a dungeon rife with challenging puzzles. Up until the point of my failure, I'd been doing remarkably well, I'd had some very good luck with my halfling up to and before we arrived.


Things quickly ran downhill, however, when we entered an icy portion of the dungeon with seperated rooms full of closed coffins. The floors in each room were completely frozen over and slick, and our genius barbarian thought it would be a great idea to use me as a bowling ball against the skeletons that popped up. Sadly, he succeeded, however I did not. He launched me into one of the rooms, where, after rolling the '1', I collided with a group of skeletons and was knocked out cold from hitting my head on one of the coffins. On top of that, my warhound decided to slide in right after me and pin me against the coffin.... it was very humiliating xD

 

[Clockwork Syringe]

I'm currently in a group myself so this one's fairly recent. So one of my party is playing as a fighter who's waiting for the order to charge and the fun part is, he drank a potion of berserk. So when the time comes to make the will save to resist the potion's effects, he rolls a one. We're all laughing at this point, when his character bursts through the gate door with his entire body and just runs at the enemy balls to the wall. He did survive though, but it was hilarious none the less.