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nyxxie

nyxxie

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benny&minnie
















If my body is somewhere else right now
She still fills me with warmth and I breathe
The sun in her eyes


Rae by more fatter







/* ------ credit -- do not remove ------ */

ยฉ weldherwings.
 



minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    genie i have 1 wish and it's for everyone to disappear

















"You know I don't mind tradition but I feel like this one could be broken"
Her eyes seemed to gaze outside the BMW's window, looking at the blurring cityscape in front of her, yet her mind was somewhere far away, in a place where she could accurately calculate the chances of survival if she jumped out of the car in that exact instant. There were very few things Minerva Akira absolutely dreaded and one of them was sacrificing her precious weekend to go to those family gatherings with the Millers.

James, her father, sighed as he stirred the wheel, "Minnie they are old friends and-" he went on a tangent about keeping the connection, but the female's hands were already typing on her phone. She was adding the final description for her latest post in that instance. It had been a couple of days since she had finished the lyrics and she was really eager to post it on her anonymous account where she went by the name of Muse.

In the post, the female would have her lyrics posted, followed by a white screen with an audio file of her voice singing the lyrics so an idea of how the melody went was shown. It was the perfect plan, she had never really sung for others rather than her older brother in real life, and no one would be able to relate the account back to her, so it was safe to say she could carry her identity in secret. The white circle of upload slowly filled up before finally revealing the post to her 20k followers, almost immediately starting to get some reactions, which made a genuine smile appear on her features.

The drive to the Miller's house was rather quick, Kira never really realized if it was because they lived close or because time flew whenever she thought of her lyrics and scrolled through the positive feedback in the comments. Deep down she wished she could focus on the lyrics instead of having to sing as well, she felt her soft tone couldn't reflect the emotion of some of the songs, and she didn't have the musical knowledge to play other instruments apart from basic guitar and piano. The female gently shook her head before it she started to get all too excited about her secret hobby of hers, after all, there were more immediate things to take care of, like the whole dinner she was attending to.

When she finally got out of the car, she took a moment to slightly stretch her white top and sage pants, fiddling gently with the fine golden-toned rings on her fingers as a way of entertainment. The calculated footsteps of her mother made their way to her daughter, tucking some strands of her hair behind her ear whilst placing a gentle peck on her forehead,
"You look great Minerva" A tiny smile grew on her mother's face as she spoke with her slightly Hispanic accent. She was clearly in a good mood after Kira's scores on the business exam, and the young female wanted to keep it that way even if it meant not letting her know how much she had been wanting to focus on her hobbies.

Her hazel green eyes dashed to the door she had seen more often than she would've liked to ever admit, and let out a gentle exhale as the Hudsons made their way to ring the bell. Kira wondered if she could find a zen spot in her mind and not snap at Benjamin Miller since he had always seemed to have a talent for irritating her with his teasing. Due to her competitive nature as a cause of the pretty strict mentality her mother had made her grow in, Kira slowly, throughout the years, developed a sense of rivalry towards Benjamin. He was someone who, to her eyes, was just slacking and relaxing in all classes yet he still managed to pull off really high scores, something she usually had to work hard for. It didn't help to change her close-minded opinion on Benny the fact that at the dinners, just like the one she was attending right now, the parents always ended up comparing their children in between polite laughs.
Her thoughts were soon stopped by the sound of the door opening and with yet another deep breath, Kira's lips curled into a polite smile, one that secretly hoped that tonight's dinner ended faster than the ride to their home.



































don't freak



the aces










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benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    a little mischievous
















Benjamin was all for pissing off his father, but dinners with friends weren't the time to do so. Of course, he was going to anyway. Duh. He was aware of how much it annoyed his father. That was the fun of it, though: Ben could tell he was mad, but his father couldn't do anything about it with guests around. Despite his devilish plans, Ben still decided to dress in something nice just to give his father false hope. Which was funny, considering how often Benjamin pulled this trick when guests came over. Hadn't his father learned by now? Benny was the king of tomfoolery.

He had gotten out of the shower about twenty minutes before the Hudsons were to arrive, much to both his father and his step-mother Leah's dismay. They were both quite serious when it came to dinners with friends and family: the whole house had to be cleaned, everyone had to be on best behavior, the appetizers had to be perfectly set, and the main course had to be almost finished -- so they didn't seem too eager, yet still ready to plate as soon as the guests were ready to eat. It was all quite exhausting and particular. Ben couldn't stand it.

Most of all, he couldn't stand Minerva. Minnie. The Hudsons' daughter. She was totally prissy. So serious, never any fun. Benny tried not to judge anyone, but he'd known Minnie forever. That's just what she was like. Once upon a time she actually was pretty fun to be around -- when they were kids -- but something changed, and all of a sudden she was a completely different person. It was even more unfortunate that their parents always compared them, something he didn't like very much, and he knew Minnie definitely didn't either. Well, he did enjoy the look of annoyance that crossed her face whenever her parents complimented him and gave her a look that said 'why can't you be more like him?' It was satisfying to see Miss Perfect get compared to him. He knew she hated it.

Ben was running his hands through his wet hair, lazily styling it, when his sister Bea leaned on his doorway, arms crossed, with a smirk on her face. "Excited?" she asked, and he only snorted in response.

"Very funny." He adjusted his blazer and then looked back at her, "How's dad? Hyperventilating yet?"

Beatrice scoffed, "Oh, he has been for the last, hm, let's see... hour. Mostly because of you. Why do you have to get ready literally five minutes before they're here? Come on. Get your ass downstairs, slow-poke."

He put his hands up in defense, "Okay! Okay! I'm coming. Jesus." Beatrice only rolled her eyes in response and made her way downstairs as he made the final touches to his hair.

By the time he got downstairs, his father couldn't reprimand him because the Hudsons were already at the door, ringing the doorbell. All he did was give Ben a nasty glare, before putting on his best smile and answering the door, pretending he hadn't been standing around waiting for the last twenty minutes. Benny's father was quite an anxious man, though he'd never admit it. He was a perfectionist, always wanting everything to go his way.

"Welcome, welcome!" His father's voice boomed as he greeted the Hudsons. Benjamin sighed and gave Beatrice a side-glance that said 'God-help-us' before putting on an identical smile to his father's. He had nothing against the Hudsons, so he'd be nice. Even though him and Minnie had their weird little feud, Ben was the type of guy that went with the flow; he was laidback. He was only annoying around Minnie because he knew it irritated her, not because he really had anything against her. Well, except of course that she was so uptight. Their personalities completely clashed.

Ben said hello to everyone, shaking hands, and was overall quite pleasant. But only for now. The dinner table was where he was going to pull his usual shenanigans -- things that the Hudsons may not notice, but his dad would. He could picture it now: his father's head about to explode, Beatrice trying not to laugh, and Leah keeping things polite with an apologetic smile. Benny couldn't wait.

































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
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minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    i'm gonna regret this one aren't i

















If she was honest with herself, there had always been a part of her that missed her friendship with Benjamin. Her mind still remembered some fun core memories that tricked her into seeing Benny with better eyes than she really should. After her brother Leo left to pursue his dream life, her mother was especially harsh on making a competitive machine out of Minnie, which included learning to place faรงades when necessary and slightly distort her opinion on certain people.
As the door opened, her eyes almost immediately dashed to Benjamin, in case he was about to pull a prank first thing when opening the door. To her surprise, he was actually well dressed for the occasion, inevitably giving a quick scan before her attention quickly went back to the parents. They were all greeted in between large smiles, polite hugs and handshakes although Minnie's father was genuinely happy to see the Millers, the female believed he remembered the most the friendship of their children when they were younger.

Leah was someone Minerva actually looked up to, she had always seemed to be so kind and welcoming, so she couldn't help but greet her with a warmer smile. A part of her wondered if she or Bea realized the "old Minerva" wasn't gone, but it was just hidden under layers and layers that she had built for, well, pleasing her mother really as clichรฉ as it sounds.

"Is it just me or the house keeps getting prettier?" Her mother said with a gentle, controlled chuckle that lead to some small talk between the adults.
It really is just you. Minerva thought as she tried to not make her eye roll really obvious. Her attention drifted around the room as they made their way to the dinner table. For a moment she felt at ease with the dinner, but that was before her eyes landed in a reflection, Benny's reflection, and she remembered how polite and correct he had been so far. However her instincts knew better, they might be in a rather weird rivalry now, but she knew him, and he clearly had something, or various things planned. It was in those moments where she thought about the rivalry, since deep down she knew that his troublemaking was at least something that would give the dinner a twist.
No, she told herself, he'll just be as irritating as ever. There were little things that annoyed Minerva as much as Benjamin's ways of always making her as irritated as possible.

It took longer than it should've but finally they all sat down at their assigned chairs, well, they weren't really assigned, but after so many dinners everyone just got used to their spot, it just so happened she was next to Mister Troublemaker-but-still-get-away-with-it. She disliked it mainly because it just leads to even more comparison, and it couldn't get more bothersome than having his nagging presence right next to her, she just had to constantly be on alert to whatever he had in mind. As usual, her hands began to play around with her rings trying her best to focus on the conversation of whatever superficial topic they were on about, and praying to all the gods she knew that they wouldn't switch it up to them, although they always did. Always.

"So? What do you think of Benjamin's band Minerva? You get to see them live at the college right?" She slightly tensed up in her seat, having disassociated for a moment meant the question had caught her completely off guard.
"Well um..."
She looked at her father, wondering where the hell he was trying to go with that question. In that instant, her mind was divided, could she leave her pride aside in order to complement the headache next to her? In her mind, she could already picture his smug face, but her parent's expectant look stared right back, so she went with honesty, giving a quick glance to the young male before focusing on the adults,
"They do a good job and their song selections are always nice.. I mean! So I've been told-"
Her hands tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, she tried hard to bite her tongue on the compliments, keeping it as short as possible. Of course, she liked how they played, they were really good, and the music style was right up her alley, she knew most of the covers they had done, and their original music was also really good, but she wouldn't give him the pleasure of knowing how she felt about it.

"Everyone enjoys it when they play, crowds form constantly you see, so I guess that leaves a pretty clear idea of how they are doing"
A gentle uncomfortable chuckle left her lips, all the parents seemed pleased with the answer, and she did not even dare to turn and look at the male during her response, although a small glance did escape, wondering what face he would have on, and how much she would have to regret opening her mouth.



































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
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benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    surprised
















After all the useless niceties, kisses on the cheek, and shaking of hands, they finally made their way over to the dinner table. Benny couldn't stand the small talk at the door, it seemed so pointless to him. They'd known each other forever, and these dinners weren't exactly a once-a-year thing, though it was slowly but surely coming to that (thank God!). It came to a surprise to Ben when he was sat next to Minnie at the dinner table, something he hadn't been expecting. Perhaps his father was just completely oblivious, because there was no doubt a weird sort of tension between him and Minnie. It wasn't the smartest setting them near each other. Not that she would make a fuss, but he would definitely annoy the hell out of her. However, it seemed that none of the parents realized this, instead too busy catching up with each other.

Beatrice was sitting on the other side of Minnie, which Ben supposed was purposeful after all these years. The "kids" all sitting next to each other. He watched his sister politely converse with Minnie as the parents had their own conversations. Beatrice was much more mature and polite compared to Ben. Although she also wasn't the biggest fan of these dinners, she didn't show it. Plus, she had always liked Minnie, anyway. They were similar in some ways, Ben noticed throughout the years.

After a moment, the conversation turned back to them, and Benny couldn't help but grin at how flabbergasted Minnie looked when her father asked the question about his band. He was expecting her to say something half-hearted like, "oh they're alright" or even give a snarky reply, but instead she was actually quite... complimentary? Now he was the flabbergasted one, hiding his surprise with a confused chuckle. Ben was surprised she even knew about his music, let alone how in-depth she was able to go about it. Although she was shy with her words, he could tell she meant what she said.

See, the thing was, he didn't have anything against Minnie. Not really. Yeah, maybe she was prissy and uptight, but that wasn't any reason to dislike her. Way back when, they had even been friends. She used to be artistic, like him. Minnie was fun to be around, and they would talk for hours about music. Where did that version of her go? He wasn't sure, and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up now. Their little 'friendship' ended quite awhile ago, and the only interactions they had with each other now were bickering and sly insults. Benny didn't fully understand the change, but he wasn't going to linger on it. He didn't really want anything to do with her now considering how stuck-up she was, and he assumed she felt the same about him.

He shook himself out of his surprised state, and grinned. "Yeah, we're actually getting pretty popular around campus. I play the guitar and sing mostly, though I've been trying out the keyboard. It's nice to hear that Minnie has been enjoying it, too. Sounds like we have a superfan here." Ben had a feeling that his end comment would definitely irritate her. He even saw the warning look his father was giving him because of it. He could just hear it now, "Benjamin, just take the compliment and leave it at that. I don't know why you always have to make a comment or brag about everything. It's ridiculous."

Minnie's father gave him a tight lipped smile, and her mother let out a polite chuckle. They both seemed impressed with his ability to learn new instruments so quickly. Soon after, however, they moved on to the next topic. Considering their parents were so immersed in whatever they were talking about, Benny leaned over to Minnie and said teasingly, "I didn't know you knew so much about my shows. Kind of stalkerish, don't cha think?" All previous plans to annoy his father were gone, now he had his eye set on annoying Minnie. He couldn't help it, after what she had said about his music -- what better way could he show his appreciation? Based on her facial expression, Ben could tell she was regretting her words already.

While Ben liked to tease and make fun, a part of him couldn't help but feel a sense of pride. His father never wanted him to do anything with music, always criticizing him for his choices and never complimenting him on his accomplishments. So, in a way, it was nice that someone was noticing. The praise was welcomed, as it wasn't something he got from his father a lot. Leah, sometimes, but not as much when his father was around. Beatrice supported him but was never around to come to his shows. Plus, nobody in his family was very musically-inclined. That's why he'd initially had such an inclination towards Minnie and her brother Leo, both of which were very artistic. They understood where he was coming from. Well, maybe not Minnie anymore...

































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 



minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    about to take a vow of silence

















Oh god.
He was such a baboon.
He was literally a baboon stuck in a human body.

Minnie had never wished so much as right now to go back to the conversation she was having with Bea. Even though it wasn't a really in-depth conversation, she would've much rather chat with the other female, who had made the dinner much more bearable by offering her a warm smile and a nice conversation, than having to deal with her brother. Matter of fact, Minerva was pretty convinced Benjamin could learn a thing or two of his younger sister, but she guessed he was the clear walking and breathing representation that the phrase 'boys will be boys' did hold some truth.

In an instant, she wondered why had she ever thought there would been a chance that he would keep his big mouth shut, after all Benny had never missed a chance to torture her whenever possible since, well, since their distancing. The moment he called her a superfan, she thought she was about to lose it. Whenever he managed to push her buttons, all the accumulated anger she had been controlling during each dinner was always on the verge of coming out in any instant. Her jaw was slightly clenched as she tried her best to control her instinct of wanting to drench his clothes with a full bottle of wine that was on the table temptingly close to her.

In moments like that she questioned how she had ever felt an attraction to the boy, it probably seemed obvious as childhood friends that feelings would spark, and for Minerva, they did, quite the wholesome sweet experience of having a first proper crush and all. It seemed like such a pity and waste of energy now to see who had tricked her with his charms as a kid.

"It's nice to hear that Minnie has been enjoying it, too. Sounds like we have a superfan here."
The sentence slightly echoed in her head and for a tiny second the female wondered how sharp were the knives at the table, but she decided it would be such a pity to use them on him (because of the pretty cutlery of course),
"Oh? I didn't know my three compliments were so influential as to give me the superfan title without hesitation, you caught me by surprise there Benny "
. She already knew the face her mother was probably making in that instant, something in between warning and surprise as she didn't usually snap in front of the parents. Thankfully they moved on to talk about another topic, and just as she predicted, she soon had a stupidly good-looking (objectively speaking and only objectively) face close to her,
"I didn't know you knew so much about my shows. Kind of stalkerish, don't cha think?"
.

For a second she bit her bottom lip, suppressing the rain of insults that were just about to leave her mouth automatically as a reflex whilst her cheeks slightly flushed in an embarrassed light pink tone, and focused on looking at her glass reaching out for it,
"Trust me, it's like if everyone in the city is genuinely forced to listen, you guys have the amps always at the maximum volume."
Grabbing her glass, she proceeded to take a gentle sip, deciding it would definitely not have been worth it to waste such a nice wine on the troublemaker,
"Not even noise-cancelling headphones work..."
Her face then turned to glare at the male, tilting close and holding eye contact with a daring glimmer,
"trust me i've tried many times"


Of course that was partially a lie, she had tried just for study sessions when the band practised, since her favourite study spot was rather close to the music room. Yet again, she wouldn't let him know her enjoyment, honestly, she wished he did a worse job so it was easier to keep up with the act. The way he found so much passion in music and had the chance to publicly show it was something the female to some extent envied. Her emotions on the creative field had always been mixed due to her brother. After all, he had the chance to escape and do what he truly loves, but that also meant leaving her to deal with all the family demands, but it wasn't as if she could blame him for it, could she? He was just the bravest out of the two. In more than one way that also applied to Benjamin, he was still doing well in class whilst having the guts to be focused on his music and let the world know.

Would she ever be able to do the same? Could 'Muse' be discovered as 'Minerva' at some point?
The gentle chuckle of her mother made her wake up back to her reality... Whenever she found hope, she knew the reminder of what was expected of her would pretty much hunt her. Her eyes stayed on Benny's for longer than they should've, a hint of nostalgia resurfaced on her face before she slightly turned away, trying to find something, anything to get distracted with.


































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 



benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    surprised
















It was quite honestly surprising when Minnie snippily replied back to him, the snark evident in her voice. Her words bounced right off of him, though, because Ben had never been the type to let much get to him. Unless of course it was his father. That man could probably obliterate someone (metaphorically) with just a single sentence. Throughout the years, Ben learned how to cope with it, but he would never fully be able to recover from some of the things his father said. He was a tough guy. Intimidating. Benny always wondered how he and Leah ever got along, with how soft-spoken she often was.

He glanced at the adults before replying to Minnie, just to gauge if they were still preoccupied -- they were. "Aw. My music bothers little Minnie so much that she has to put on headphones. Honestly, I'll take that as a compliment. Thank you." He grinned, and glanced over at Beatrice who was rolling her eyes at him. "You're such an immature asshole," she mouthed. He shrugged in response. Bea sat up in her seat, fixing her posture, ignoring him as she said something to Minnie. "Don't entertain him. He's just doing it to get on your nerves."

Ben gasped dramatically at her words, "Oh, I would never!" Beatrice only sighed and rolled her eyes again, something she did often when she was around him. After a moment, the parents stopped speaking as the appetizer was served: butternut squash soup. Everyone tentatively ate it, and after a moment Leah looked up at Minnie with a gentle smile.

"So, Minerva. How's school for you? Ben here doesn't tell us too much, so I thought I'd ask how you're doing." She said, laughing lightheartedly.

Leah was the only one in his family who would ask you questions and genuinely care about your answer. She also wasn't the type to compare you with others, something Ben was sure Minnie knew after all these years. She was asking because she was genuinely curious -- and also probably because Ben really didn't tell her much about what went on at school. Honestly, the poor woman probably would be appalled if she heard, so Ben saved her from that.

Benjamin did well in school, so neither his father nor Leah put up much of a fuss about his extracurricular activities. While of course his father always had something negative to say, he kept it at a minimum considering Ben was doing what he wanted, being enrolled in business school and all that. Benny wasn't passionate about business whatsoever; he only did it to satiate his father. Thankfully, it came easy to him. He hadn't gotten anything less than an A- in any of his classes so far, and he hardly had to try. This was something he was incredibly grateful for, considering it gave him the ability to focus more on music and what he was actually passionate about.

While he no longer talked much to Minnie, at least not amicably, he knew she was in business school because of her parents as well. Before they drifted apart, Ben could remember the days they'd sit and complain about their parents' expectations for them -- the pressure to follow in their footsteps, to become business men and women -- and how exhausting it was. He wasn't sure if she held the same views anymore, as she was always at the library, concentrating on school, seemingly never having any fun. Perhaps she had grown to like it. Benjamin wasn't sure.

While he did not keep tabs on Minnie at school, there was still a part of him that cared about her, deep down. They had some mutual friends -- Ben was friends with all sorts of people -- so sometimes he would overhear what she was up to. Nobody really knew of their history, and he was sure she liked to keep it that way. There was no way she wanted to be associated with him.

































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 



minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    really wanting for earth to swallow her whole

















The way she could practically see her words rebound off Benny made her irritation just increase. It was maddening how he really couldn't care less, but at the same time, it had been one characteristic of his that had made them closer when they were younger. For now, she had to control her impulse to stretch his cheeks until he begged for mercy and just childishly give him a murderous glare.

"Don't entertain him. He's just doing it to get on your nerves."
Bea's voice felt like music to her ears, with a gentle sigh, Minerva's attention went back to the other female, to whom she gave a small smile. She knew she was mostly feeling polite, but it felt good to be supported by someone in the Millers. Very deep down, there was a part of her that was really scared of losing complete contact with Benjamin his opinion of her had clearly changed throughout the years, and if it wasn't for Bea and Leah's effort, it would've been extra difficult to continue to find some sort of comfort in those infamously uncomfortable dinners.

"Trust me I know. Clearly, he's been thinking a lot about me if he's perfected the skill so much"
She smirked lightly as Bea gave a light chuckle.

Benny's dramatic response was received with a small grumble on behalf of the female who took another long sip of her drink before she said something she'd probably regret (because of the other members in the room at that moment of course). As Leah mentioned her name, the female sat up lightly straightening her back, it was as if she had always tried to make a good impression on her even though she knew her well enough by now. Her lighthearted laugh was definitely contagious, and Minnie allowed herself to lightly chuckle,
"Hm I wonder why's that"
she commented as she glanced over at Benny, referring to her point about him not telling much about the classes.

Of course she knew the answer to that. She matched with him in some classes, and whenever her glance at some point had curiously looked at him, ( mostly to compare herself to him... he was a top student after all. Was he taking notes? Revising?...) she'd be greeted with a boy who seemed to have his head in the clouds or in a notebook she was pretty sure he used for his songs.

Minerva tried her best to think her answer through before replying, but of course, her mother had readily stepped in, she always did so in moments like these, so as to set the tone for her answer before her daughter even had a chance to reply, "Oh she seems to be enjoying it more now right Minerva? The Finance professor sent us a letter and everything on her "continuous excellent attitude and hard work" as he wrote, it was a pleasant surprise for sure" Both of her parents let a fabricated proud chuckle as they looked at their clearly uncomfortable daughter, who had wanted to keep the letter a secret, she just didn't like boasting about the compliments she received, and now Benjamin Miller knew about it, just great... more ammunition for him to use.

It was difficult to keep a neutral face, and the genuine smile on her face when Leah had asked her about her opinion lightly became more lifeless as her mother took over,
"Ah, yes"
she said in a rather serious tone before clearing her thoughts and preparing herself for a correct, not honest, but correct answer.

How could have she imagined saying the truth for a moment there? Sure there were parts of the business that were interesting, but she wasn't passionate about it at all. The concepts didn't sit right in her brain, and she struggled to see the logic in having to know so many intricacies that seemed to only add onto more theory for an exam rather than real word application. That's why she had to spend so much studying... Since after all, in order to be good enough for her mother, she had to be the best. Minerva's mindset on what she was studying hadn't changed much; she really didn't like the way most things were being taught.

Whenever she looked outside, and saw Benjamin with his bandmates making their way to the music room, she couldn't help but feel a bit jealous that he was able to have so much freedom. In another circumstance, it would've been a healthy kind of jealousy, and she would've probably asked him for help with whatever she got stuck with, so she would have time to jam with them in their practices. But life was not that easy, or it could be, but the control the fear of disappointing her parents had over her was enough to shut off any chances, and so they ended up in their current silly little rivalry. Some place in her mind told her it was better that way, although Benjamin was quite popular since he got along with everyone and was really approachable, she highly doubted he'd want to stick around her, especially since at first glance most would box her in a competitive yet reserved personality, the complete opposite to the boy.

"Well, I guess like in any other place, some classes are more fun than others, but honestly, I find them all pretty interesting... I guess that mentality is what's helped me keep my grades"
Everything was rehearsed, from the way she smiled at Leah to the way her voice spoke... Pathetic she thought to herself, but it was what had allowed her to keep up her faรงade. Her curriculum was filled with straight A's and A+ with some A- in a couple of areas, yet, she wasn't allowed to be proud about it, since it was what it was expect of her, no matter how much effort it had taken her to achieve those scores.

"As of right now we are focusing on real-life case studies, specifically unicorn companies and their strategy. It seems more easy to understand the theory now that we get to see it mirrored in real life, you know?"
Her eyes glanced to her mother who nodded her head in approval, and in that moment Minerva realized she hadn't stopped to catch a breath.

Her eyes momentarily looked down at her palms, as if she was ashamed of her own answer, however, she quickly remembered she wasn't alone in that room and the smile went quickly back again, hoping the second hadn't been really noticed and she could smoothly go on, turning to Benny because honestly, it had taken her more energy than anticipated to blatantly lie and keep her cool,
"I'm sure Benny also his own favourite lessons, right?"


She knew she hadn't really answered Leah's question, but there was no way she would focus on the "How you're doing", three, well, technically four words that had pretty much never come out of her mother's mouth, since she always assumed for her own convenience that Minerva was doing okay. The fact that they had let her keep the piano and guitar for recreational purposes should be enough for her to be content... Minerva was sure that that was her mindset. For now, she could take the pressure off of having the parents' eyes on her, since they now waited for Benjamin's answer.



































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
Last edited:



benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    alexa, play 'curl up & die' by matt maltese
















Benjamin couldn't hide his grimace as Minerva's mother threw in a subtle brag about Minnie. There hadn't been too many comparisons so far -- they were doing so well until now! But, once one parent started bragging about their child's accomplishments, the other parent would do so in return. A sort of passive aggressive back and forth. Ben also wasn't very surprised that her mother was talking over her daughter, not letting her answer Leah's question herself. Ben knew how frustrating it could be. His father tried to do it sometimes -- answering a question meant for him -- but fortunately Ben was outspoken enough to stop it from happening. It didn't seem like Minnie was the same, and he couldn't help but feel a bit bad for her. Both of their parents had always been like this. Except for Leah, of course, who kept out of it, smiling sweetly as she always did. Her question hadn't even been technically answered, but she seemed satisfied.

After her mother spoke, Ben could see the gears shifting in Minnie's mind, thinking of something to add. She responded after a moment, completely honest it seemed from her tone of voice, and Benjamin had to resist the urge to roll his eyes when she threw a question at him. God, he hated all of his classes. None of them were very interesting, and the other students in his classes were either complete douche-bags -- perfect future businessmen and women -- or people who took things entirely too seriously. While Benjamin didn't care for the business world, he did well in class, and that was all that mattered. So, he couldn't help but grin when he realized this was a perfect opportunity to piss off his dad. He probably was going a bit far, but he didn't care. Pissing off his dad was worth it. Benny had been just waiting for this. He was going to answer the question with 100% honesty.

"Well, Minnie. Thank you for asking," he put on a serious-tone of voice, as if he was going to actually answer the question maturely. His father almost looked impressed at his politeness, "There's a reason I don't talk about my classes..." Ben trailed off, leaning back in his seat casually, "Truthfully, I can't say I like them very much. Matter of fact, I strongly dislike them. Hate them, even. I can't believe I'm going to be spending the rest of my life doing something I don't even like." He shrugged, saying it all very nonchalantly, so much so that if you weren't listening intently you probably wouldn't have even caught it. It wasn't his most clever comment, definitely immature (which he was, no denying that), but the satisfaction he got seeing his father's face fall made it worth it. "Just being honest. But it's cute you're enjoying your classes. I can't relate. Never will." Ben directed his final comment at Minnie.

Complete and utter silence fell over the dinner table. Nobody said anything for several moments. Beatrice sighed heavily and looked away, crossing her arms. Leah frowned. His father looked furious, clenching his fists. Benjamin flared his nostrils, a bit nervous now. Usually, the reaction was a couple awkward laughs before moving on. His dad usually confronted and reprimanded him after the dinner, but it didn't seem like that was going to happen this time, Ben thought, when he noticed his father get up from his seat.

"Benjamin, come into the kitchen with me please," he said, burning holes into him. He then turned to the dinner table, "Sorry. Excuse us. Leah, honey, tell them about that trip you went on with friends a few weeks ago!" Leah obliged and turned to the Hudson's to begin talking about her trip, pretending as if nothing had happened.

This was the first time Benjamin could say he was shocked by his father's reaction. While he wouldn't say he was nervous to go into the kitchen, he definitely was not looking forward to it. This was completely unexpected, so he knew to follow him. Ben could tell just from the tone of voice his father used and the way he looked at him that he meant serious business.

Awkwardly -- for one of the first times in his life -- he got up and followed his father.

Once they got to the kitchen, Ben couldn't even start to defend himself, because his father put up his index finger, indicating for him to be quiet. And for one of the first times in his life, he followed his father's directions.

"Ben. You know I typically deal with your bullshit after, but I am getting sick of this. I don't even think I want you at the dinner table anymore," he closed his eyes as if he was pained before quietly continuing. "You're continuously disappointing me. Us. I wish you would just behave for once. You act just as your mother would have -- immaturely. You're twenty-one years old, you're getting too old for this. It's not funny, not charming. Just embarrassing for everyone involved. I wish you'd be grateful."

Another pause. Ben typically would have interrupted him by now, but he was too shocked to do so now. "This has been going on for too long. At first it was infuriating, but now you're just disappointing. Please, for the rest of the night, stay in your room. Do us all a favor, alright, Ben?" His father put his hands on his shoulders as he said this, looking him in the eye before walking out of the kitchen, not waiting or caring for a reply.

Benjamin stood in shock for what felt like forever. His father's anger was typical, it was what he was used to. He always knew there was underlying disappointment, but it had never been expressed so bluntly like that. Maybe Ben had gone a bit far, yes, but he was simply joking. He was just trying to get on his father's nerves. It wasn't even the worst thing he'd ever said! But, thinking about it more deeply, he realized his father had probably been keeping this in for ages. And finally, finally decided Ben deserved to hear it. Quite honestly, his father expressing his disappointment was worse than his anger. Ben was embarrassed to find a lump forming in his throat as he dissociated in the kitchen. While he didn't care about the dinner -- and honestly would have preferred to stay in his room -- it hurt that this was the way it happened.

For the first time in a long time, he felt utterly humiliated.

































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
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minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    one way ticket home please and thank you

















Benjamin David Miller, she thought, what the fuck are you doing?

It was one of the very few instances where Minerva felt genuine panic about what the male was getting himself into. If it had been any other sort of comment, she probably wouldn't have cared as much, or at least, she would've done a better job at hiding her slight fear of what could happen. For everyone at the table, the children's future was always a delicate subject, yet it always seemed as if they were being tested at the table as if they were asked on purpose so the parents could savour the right answers they knew they didn't get in their own privacy.

"But it's cute you're enjoying your classes. I can't relate. Never will"
His words cut deeper than she imagined, and a tight knot formed in her throat, with a wave of emotions crashing against her. It wasn't clear what was more predominant... Was it the shame she felt for not being able to stand her own ground just as Benjamin had always been bold enough to do? Was it the sudden reality check of how chained down she had forced herself to be in order to keep her parents content? Or was it how much his defiance reminded her of Leo, her older brother, and the consequences of his actions?

To his words, her eyes remained fixated on him, with the same slightly shocked and speechless expression as before, mixed in between a glare and a worried look. Sudden flashbacks of moments before Leo left their house appeared in her mind... She still vividly remembered those tormenting months of fights and screams even though it had been years since he cut ties. Minerva didn't wish that experience on anyone else.

Not even her worse enemy.

As Michael Miller was followed by his son in the middle of the dinner to another room, Minerva followed them with her eyes. She had a hunch that Ben had probably stepped too far over the line, as he had never been taken from the table before this, and as her eyes turned to search for Bea's expression, she could tell her hunch was right on point. Suddenly, the filter she had left, and decided to act on pure impulse, something she would've never allowed herself to. To not seem suspicious, she waited a few moments before standing up, excusing herself to go to the bathroom. She of course knew where she had to head to, but her footsteps seemed to slow down as she got closer to the older male voice echoing slightly through the corridor.

She didn't understand what was she doing there, standing still in the middle of the corridor eavesdropping in a conversation that was none of her business. Her body had remained in a similar stance when Leo got into those fights with their mother as if waiting to know if she would have to step in or run away before either of them saw her. Michael's words were deeply hurtful, it would've been Minerva's biggest fear to hear those words come out of her mother's mouth, someone to whom she had dedicated all her life to making her proud.

Yet, for some reason, it was Ben's silence that seemed the most surprising out of all of what she heard. The female knew he had most definitely taken it too far, yet, he didn't deserve the words he was hearing from someone as close as his father. However, she knew this was not her battle to fight, maybe, if things had been different, she would have had the guts to step in, yet a much larger force kept asking herself why was she caring so much. Before anyone could see anything, she made sure to quickly shut the bathroom door for a moment, and use the chance to look at herself in the mirror, fixing the few strands of hair that had slightly moved, and distracting herself by slightly pinching her tanned-tone skin, pinching her cheeks lightly to keep herself awake in the moment, avoiding dissociating back to the past.
"Not your problem"
She whispered to her reflection before getting out.

By the time she got back to the table, everything had clearly calmed down, and it was clear that all of the parents were experts at ignoring the elephant in the room at all times. She managed to get through it all thanks to Bea, who kept sweet short conversations with Minerva, something she was deeply thankful for, although there was this microscopic and annoying little voice in her head wondering about Benjamin, even though she was sure he would much rather be in his room right now... She personally wishes she could be at hers.

Thankfully, after a couple of hours, her wish came true. The ride home felt like an eternity as all she could think about was getting her pyjamas on and finally taking a rest before starting tomorrow's classes.
"It was so nice to see the Millers again wasn't it?" His father chipped in as a way to keep a conversation going, "I saw you chatting quite a bit with Benjamin, it's good to see those old bonds come back!"

"I wouldn't personally call that chatting, either way, it was cut short wasn't it?"
Her eyes looked at her father for a second, wondering if he would comment on Ben's father's attitude at the table. A gentle overly-optimistic chuckle escaped his lips, something that somehow managed to tick off Minnie even though she was half-listening half-in-another-universe. Her eyes discretely rolled, it didn't even feel human how they could easily ignore all the problems, but yet again, this was an attitude she had seen her parents use over and over again.

"Oh and those trips Leah talked about?" Her mother went on with a gentle smile quickly skipping onto the next topic, "They clearly know how to have a good time, we'll have to try and organize something together at some point" Both of her parents chuckled and fantasized about the idea of a perfect friendly trip, but every word coming out of their mouths made Minerva feel car sick (she was never car sick) and with a strong will to end it all. Even though she considered herself someone agnostic or atheist, she prayed in her head to all the gods she knew that they would never EVER consider that idea again.

Finally, there was home sweet home. After waving goodnight, Minerva tried her best to not sprint into her room. Fitting on her comfy pyjama and unbuttoning the top buttons as she usually did, the female quickly switched on her computer, making sure to lock her bedroom door. It was on the top floor, which also allowed her to have time to switch the tab if her parents came in as she could distinguish their steps, something she had grown as a survival mechanism. Her fingers gently played with her hair and made a loose braid as she switched in her one and only safe place. Muse.

Her post had already gained some attention, and a gentle smile formed on her lips as she read through the supportive comments, praising her relatable lyrics, or commenting on how sweet her voice sounded in the memo. It was like if a bubble formed around her, one that shielded her from the outside world. Yet, Benjamin's words echoed in her head, how he had looked at her when talking about her fake love for the subjects, and how he passionately stood his ground. Minerva couldn't be as bold, that was for sure, but in that moment, she let her impulsive thoughts take control, and quickly designed a story of her guitar and a closed notebook where she wrote her lyrics.

'hey c: looking to collab with some musicians who are up to let me help with their lyrics.
lately, i've been thinking it's time to take some initiative you know? and i know there won't be a greater feeling than hearing my lyrics sung live by someone i synergize well with.

if you are interested (or know someone who is), drop a dm. as long as you are comfortable with my anonymity we are off
to a good start.

can't wait to start new projects'

And just with a simple press on the screen of her iphone, the story was uploaded to her account. A gentle sigh escaped her lips, all she had to do now was wait... Even though patience was not her forte, at all. Matter of fact she couldn't stay still, after pacing up and down for a couple of moments, she grabbed her guitar and started strumming chords, wondering how to continue the last chorus she had written down, and gently jamming to a couple of her full songs, in a soft mellow voice so as to not wake anyone up as it was already 1am.
The sudden vision of a red dot next to her messages caught her eye, and Minerva couldn't help but dramatically stop everything she was doing to click the inbox, which had already a couple of messages, and open the first dm without even reading the user. A disappointing sigh escaped her lips and she moved on to the next one, for yet the same reaction. Many people expected her to be the one singing, or publicly representing, whilst they were more of the instrumental work, as if they hadn't understood yet she wanted to just be a lyricist, after all, she had a vision of how her ideal voice would sound in her head... Much to her demise it was awfully similar to Ben's.

From an objective point of view, the rascal knew how to put the right amount of emotion in each of his songs, and had a tone that was unique and memorable yet at the same time standard enough to be liked by the vast majority.

As Muse, she could allow herself to think this way, after all, music was a huge part of her, and she would be blatantly honest about what she wanted or didn't, especially after publishing something that would include working for quite a long period of time with someone else. To make it compatible with her schedule, she had to work with someone she could immediately kick start, and who she wouldn't have to need to spend time on forcing herself to like the person's style.

Her thumb scrolled through until she saw something that made her freeze. Matter of fact, she had to blink a couple of times to make sure she was seeing it right. The dm was open but she wasn't reading the message, she was rereading the username over and over again in hopes it would change.

There was only one thing she was able to mutter.

"What the hell..."



































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
Last edited:



benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    maybe just a little upset
















Well, that had been a complete shit show.

Benjamin was ordered to go to his room for the rest of the night, and knowing what was good for him, he obeyed for once. He was upset, but wasnโ€™t going to cry or acknowledge his feelings because he was Benjamin Miller โ€” that wasnโ€™t his thing. He hadnโ€™t cried since he was a child. And he hardly ever got sad, everything rolled off of him like water off a duckโ€™s back. Nothing really fazed him, and he thought this applied to his fatherโ€™s angry, hurtful words as well. Ben thought heโ€™d gotten over it years ago; grew thick skin. But tonight was different. His father wasnโ€™t simply mad at him, he was disappointed. And what he said had really gotten under Benโ€™s skin. Despite it all, he held his feelings in and continued on with his night, alone in his room.

The laughs and conversations from downstairs didnโ€™t bother him. He knew they werenโ€™t talking about him; what had happened was now just the elephant in the room. They were obviously choosing to ignore it. Ben could imagine Minnie was smirking to herself, finally satisfied that he had gotten in trouble. But maybe she wasnโ€™t that cruel. Who knew. They werenโ€™t friends; perhaps she didnโ€™t care at all. Ben chose not to linger on it, on her.

His night went surprisingly smooth after that. Or as smooth as it could go when he couldnโ€™t stop thinking about his fatherโ€™s words. Nobody bothered him, so he was free to do whatever he wanted in his room, but instead all he could do was lay in bed and stare at the ceiling. Ben hadnโ€™t even changed out of his clothes from dinner. The only good thing about the whole exchange was the fact that he was feeling other emotions than his usual happy-go-lucky self did. He wouldnโ€™t admit it to himself, but he was upset โ€” angry, even. Ben wanted to explain himself and his side of the story, and his father hadnโ€™t even given him the opportunity. So, because of these emotions that had โ€œrisen from the deadโ€, his creative juices began to flow.

The band had been having some trouble lately coming up with new lyrics. While they all were creative in one way or another, lyrics just werenโ€™t something that came easy to them. Almost everything they did come up with was either surface-level or comedic. This worked for a bit, but Ben wanted to take his music more seriously. He had feelings โ€” things he wanted to sing about โ€” but he just wasnโ€™t sure how to put it on paper and create a song from them. Ben could have easily asked for help, he had tons of friends who were good at writing and creating lyrics, but his pride and ego wouldnโ€™t let him. But it was fine! He could do it himself. Him and his bandmates didnโ€™t need help, that was silly. They were already relatively popular on campus, so if they continued what they were doing, that would be enough. Right?

Maybe. The thing was, Ben didnโ€™t really care about popularity. It was nice, but for the most part he simply just wanted to create. Still, he had the urge to write more deep, emotional songs. They had a few, but not enough to satisfy him. However, it was seemingly impossible for someone like him to put his emotions out there so blatantly. He was someone who didnโ€™t acknowledge his emotions and feelings; someone who actually ignored them as much as he could.

That was until tonight. When, for once, he actually felt. Though, of course, he was too stubborn to admit he was upset. Nevertheless, he stopped in his tracks as he scrolled upon social media, reading a post about someone wanting to potentially collaborate on songs. This someone was known as Muse. Heโ€™d been following them for a few months now, finding their lyricism and writing to be quite beautiful. They posted the type of poetry and lyrics he only wished he could write. Despite never interacting with the posts, he read every single one of them, always looking forward to a post by Muse. So, considering they were looking to collaborate with a musician, Ben jumped on it immediately. What was the harm? His pride had already been thoroughly destroyed tonight, so asking for help from an anonymous lyricist felt like no big deal. Plus, he was now feeling quite creative, so this could give him the opportunity to collaborate with Muse and create something amazing.

โ€˜bennyboy69: hey muse, i saw your post about a potential collaboration. kind of sucks to admit but my band has been having some trouble with lyrics lately, so i think itโ€™d be cool if we could collab together, even for just a song or two. i think itโ€™d help my creative juices start flowing. lmk ur thoughts and if ur interested. and btw i respect ur anonymity, makes it easier for both of us :pโ€™

Ben pressed send and then shut off his phone to continue staring at the ceiling. Perhaps they would answer, perhaps not. Maybe it would go nowhere. Ben didnโ€™t mind. He put himself out there and something good might come from it.

































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 



minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    not evil just resourceful

















At a painfully slow rate, Minerva blinked her eyes, raising her hand slowly to cover her mouth as she read the message before stopping herself. Was she reading the right username? Her eyes dashed upwards to the username. Yeah, there was no doubt, it was Benjamin the one typing. What had happened so that he had found the need to message her? That must've been a reaaally low blow for him.

Quickly, her hands pressed against her table as she stood up for a moment, pacing up and down, and occasionally peeking over in case she had fallen asleep and this was just some sort of fever dream mixed with a nightmare... Or a chance. If there was something Minerva agreed with her mother, it was the fact that knowledge was power, and before she stood the perfect opportunity to get to know Benjamin, to completely dismantle his faรงade of "cool kid" . It's not like she planned on telling anyone, but the fact that there was this chance where she held the upper hand was enough to feed her ego and competitiveness into wanting to have a bigger advantage.

If she was completely honest with herself, it wasn't the worse idea ever. Sure, helping Benjamin was probably the last thing she would do; definitely not sober and would probably black out before even agreeing. Yet, he didn't know who she was, which made it easier for her to handle the situation. The band did have the right amount of fame, enough for her account to get some new followers around but not big enough so as to restrain them to a certain fanbase in the market, which allowed more freedom in terms of writing lyrics, which could potentially benefit both of them in the long run. All she had to do was be Muse, and let her little-miss-act-like-you-are-perfect Minerva faรงade away.

The chair slightly tilted back as she sat back down and rested her back on the chair... it had probably been a little while since she had left him on read, and wondered if he was online, looking at the chat, or if he had (and probably this was the case ) tossed the phone to the side. Of course, she had too much pride in everything she was considering doing, but it felt like a sort of cursed jackpot she wanted to risk. Being Muse was something that had granted her something she had lost since Leo left the house; a comfort zone. A space free of judgment from her parent's analytical gaze and comments with secret hidden intentions to mold her into their ideal doll. The female could be herself, which honestly, felt weird to say, like she was doing something wrong.

Sadly for her parents, there was a flaw in the way they had raised Minerva, since in between those strict lessons and extra classes, she had learned to earn her own drive and think independently. Sure, they had done enough to scare her from even thinking of telling them off out loud, and being afraid of picking a discussion with them, but she had her own ways to rebel about it. Glancing over to the message, she sighed knowing what her decision would be, Benjamin had given her, a chance without knowing, of being heard publicly. No more voice memos, no more simple chords in the guitar, but actual public playing. Just the thought of hearing her own lyrics made goosebumps rise on her skin, even if it meant hearing them from Benjamin Miller's mouth.

Writing lyrics and creating melodies had always been a method of escape for Minerva from her surrounding world. Sure, talking about her feelings in the first person had always been a struggle, matter of fact, she never truly revealed her raw feelings onto paper. Rather, she molded a character and invented a story in her head, one that would correlate to her emotions in a way that she could speak about them, thinking of helping someone express themselves more than her scribbling her thoughts. It was so effortless... to imagine someone else's life, to hear about their struggles and heartbreaks and write about them. Yet when she turned to her own feelings, it was like a full black circle filled with impossible, unbreakable knots. That's why probably it was rather hard to find first-person lyrics all the way through her songs, sure she could write in first person for a while, maybe for the chorus. But it had been each time more complicated to write full songs that just talked about "I feel this way...", "This is how you made ME feel...".

Letting the world know about emotions she didn't even know herself was rather scary (even though funnily enough her most viral post talked just about that), thus she had decided it was better if she stuck to what she knew and liked best, her comfort zone, giving others the chance to channel their thoughts through her.

Her thumbs caressed her screen before she began to type, quickly deleting her words, and rewriting... She knew there was certain mannerism she tended to type with when she was being formal, or when she had sent short messages to Bejamin for very specific and thankfully super occasional moments... And she knew she had to get rid of all of those if she really wanted to play it safe. This went on for a couple of solid minutes before she finally found the perfect message, where she thought that the best way to hide her personality was by showing the real her, the side Benjamin probably had forgotten.

'musesmp3: hey benny, glad to hear you are interested. i scrolled through your band's profile, and i think we could definitely work well together! dw, it's common to have lyric-block or music-block from time to time, i hope i can help with that. ty for respecting my anonymity, it's been a deal breaker for a bunch of offers sadly.

anyways! what did you have in mind? was there any wip laying around or are we starting from scratch? also, we might have some deep talks here and there, so i hope you get comfy. i think the best way for you to deliver the lines is if you feel connected to it, so i hope you're cool with that too. '

With a tiny deep breath, she clicked send and watch the message appear on the screen. So far, she didn't even question how ethical or not she was being. Minnie had an advantage, she knew something Benny didn't, her identity. She knew after all there was no way in hell he would collaborate with her if she had asked him in real life (not that she would though, she would've much rather buried herself alive), so after all, her digital persona Muse had come in way more handy than planned. As she waited a couple of minutes for a reply, she ran her fingers through her head trying to relax. The female knew she shouldn't care, she really should just relax about it, but there was a tiny voice of worry and doubt in her head she quickly muted as soon as her screen lit up again.


































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
Last edited:



benjamin miller.





































  • mood



    pleasantly surprised
















While waiting for a reply, Ben continued to stare up at the ceiling, contemplating the interaction he had with his father. Total bullshit. He was initially upset, but now he was just angry. Why couldnโ€™t his dad ever understand his side of things? Well, actually, that wasnโ€™t even possible considering he never let Ben explain himself. The man was tough, he took no shit. While Benjamin knew he had definitely taken things too far, and had embarrassed both his family and himself, didnโ€™t his dad realize it was a cry for attention? He simply wished his father was more understanding of his interests, instead of forcing him to be and do something he despised.

It had been awhile since the Hudsonโ€™s had left. The house was quiet, except for the sound of someone washing dishes, and the TV being on. However, the silence was broken by a knock at his door. He knew it wasnโ€™t his father โ€” for obvious reasons โ€” and maybe not Leah, considering she tended to stick by her husband in matters like these. The only person left was Bea, and while Benny knew she would be annoyed with him, she also cared about him and wanted to make sure he was alright.

โ€œCome in,โ€ he said, too lazy to walk and open the door. When the door opened, it revealed Bea (no surprise). She closed it after getting in the room, and then crossed her arms. โ€œBenjamin Miller, you are a goddamn menace,โ€ she began, and Ben couldnโ€™t help but grin and shrug nonchalantly, โ€œWhat can I say? He should have seen in coming.โ€

Beatrice sighed exasperatedly, โ€œDadโ€™s giving us all the silent treatment now, and I was going to ask him for some cash to buy new headphones. But now I canโ€™t because heโ€™s irritable. Thanks a lot, doofus,โ€ she walked over and sat at the edge of his bed, giving him a playful shove. Bea was the type who had a hard time comforting people โ€” just like he did โ€” and so he knew this was her way of trying to tell him she hoped he was OK without actually saying it.

Benjamin simply shrugged again, โ€œHeโ€™ll be fine by tomorrow. Iโ€™m sure of it. Especially since I go back to school โ€” Iโ€™m sure heโ€™s happy to have me outta here.โ€ Bea laughed and shook her head but didnโ€™t disagree. It was true. He was the โ€œtroubleโ€ child and always had issues with his father, so to have Ben out of his hair was a blessing. They sat in silence for a moment longer, before Bea got up from the bed and gave him an apologetic smile, โ€œSeriously though, Iโ€™m sorry about tonight. Nobody expected him to go that fucking bonkers on you,โ€ she paused, โ€œUh, but anyway. Iโ€™m heading to bed. I guess maybe Iโ€™ll see you before you leave tomorrow?โ€

Ben sat up, โ€œThanks, Bea. And I donโ€™t know. Maybe? Iโ€™m hoping to get the hell out of here before dad wakes up.โ€ Beatrice nodded, โ€œOkay then. Have fun at school. Donโ€™t get into too much trouble,โ€ she joked, โ€œNight.โ€ Ever since they were young, Beatrice had always been the one to try and comfort him after fights with his dad, of which happened quite often, especially in his teenage years. He was incredibly grateful for her. She was probably the closest heโ€™d get to someone who understood. Everyone else didnโ€™t see their fatherโ€™s bad side, so of course they would never understand why Ben had such a strained relationship with him.

Cozying back up on his bed, Benny looked at his phone notifications to find that Muse had responded. He was surprised at how quick they were, and the fact they were even interested. He thought they wouldโ€™ve been drowning in so many requests that his DM wouldnโ€™t have been seen. But apparently not. With a grin, Ben read the message and began to reply. Despite himself, he was getting excited. Music was his life and he wanted to do everything he could to create something beautiful โ€” so hopefully Muse would be able to help with that. He hadnโ€™t told his bandmates yet, but it was too early in the game. This could still end up being nothing. Heโ€™d mention it when he got back to school.

โ€˜bennyboy69: thank you for responding!! lmao iโ€™m kind of surprised, i thought you wouldnโ€™t have even gotten to my message. anyway, iโ€™m glad youโ€™re interested. i donโ€™t have too much in mind at the moment, but iโ€™ll keep you updated once i tell my bandmates about this. but ig the one idea i had in mind was something with more emotion than my usual songs. we usually go with a comedic route when writing lyrics, but i want to take things more seriously. iโ€™d be super grateful if you could help with that.โ€™

Ben sent the message without any second thoughts, and began to think about any WIPs his band had been working on. They had some, but nothing he wanted to continue with. They scrapped lyrics constantly. Although Ben wasnโ€™t going to rely on Muse for everything, he hoped theyโ€™d be able to not only give some pointers, but also some cool fucking lyrics like the ones they posted.


































scar tissue



RHCP










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 



minerva akira hudson.





































  • mood



    smooth criminal


















Whilst she saw the three dots appear on the screen as Benjamin typed, Minerva took a moment to step away and check other replies she had gotten. No matter how much she skimmed through, the little voice inside her head knew she couldn't miss the chance of getting to talk to Benjamin and discover a side of him she didn't know how many would know about. Automatically a small smirk formed on her face at the thought of dropping tiny comments that could for sure trigger him in some way... Benjamin Mr Always-gets-away would be getting some of his own teasing medicine.

Yet of course, if he were to ever discover who she was, she had way more to risk than him. No one except for her older brother knew about Muse, which had allowed her to explore her creative freedom in ways she would've never been able to otherwise. If anyone in real life, especially Benjamin out of all people in the face of planet Earth, were to discover that feature of her, she couldn't help but panic at the idea of it.

Would he see her differently for the better or would he use it as information to expose her to her parents? Minerva was of course conscious of the drastic change in personality she had gone through when her parents focused solely on her, which had ruined the close friendship Benny and her once had as kids, although Benjamin's teasing most definitely had made the change easier to handle, since he clearly knew the ways to irritate her the most. How would he think of her if he knew she was the owner?

Thankfully, the sudden sound of her phone ringing disrupted the silence not only in her room but also in the house. Every time she thought missing Leo would get better, she just kept feeling that sensation of homesickness when the female had a flashback to the days when it was the two of them in the house. However, those night calls he sometimes did make it a whole lot better.

In an instant, she quickly picked up the phone call,
"Do I really have to hear your ugly voice this late in the night?"
A gentle giggle escaped her lips, Leo was one of the very few people who got to see her bubbly and playful personality, her true self per se, something that would probably get off guard those who knew her only to a superficial level

"First of all, ouch? Secondly, I just wanted to check on the battle of the night, Hudsons versus Millers"
His tone sounded as energetic as always, he had always been a night owl, and so was his little sister.

Minerva went through some of the details, especially focusing on Benjamin and how he had busted at the table
"Ah, he has the spirit, tell him on my behalf he should keep that Spartan soldier attitude up"

"No way. Why don't you yourself? "

"Maybe because I asked for his phone number but someone won't even try to get it for me?"

"Yeah I like to keep the contact to a minimum, who knows how he'd use whatever I say against me"

A slight sigh escaped his brother's lips,
"Ay Minnie, when are you gonna let go of that shitty barrier you've put up and get your real self out there"

"Are we really gonna talk about this now?"
She gently massaged her temple, usually, she was really good at debating, but when it came to these sorts of topics, she couldn't even excuse herself, because she knew her brother was right.
"Fine fine, it's too late for the headache, but you'll get out of that Little-Miss-Perfect attitude someday, it looks real ugly on you"
By his tone she could tell he was smiling through the phone.

After saying their goodbyes, Minnie's mindset changed slightly, as it always did when she talked with Leo. Maybe, this was also a chance for her to redeem herself, from who she was trying to be and how she had been forced to cut ties in ways that were most definitely not right.

Her gaze traveled back to the Instagram app, where she read Benjamin's new message. An eyebrow gently raised at his enthusiasm for her interest in his projects, had he maybe been looking at her lyrics for a while now? The thought amused her, and most definitely raised her ego to a new level, which made her overthink disappear as she typed her next response.

'musesmp3: yes of course haha ^^ sure i've gotten other replies but keeping the anonymity really filtered the options, plus i think your voice and music style really fits to transmit the emotions i want through the lyrics. i'll wait for the heads-up on your bandmates then! and i see.. yeah i've heard a couple of your songs and it does carry a more careless attitude, but i think looking for a more serious song would definitely stand out. i am thankful that you trust my skills for it! there are many ways to go about emotional lyrics, starting with the basics; is there a specific message you want to send out to the fans? or a story worth singing? if you prefer, i'll let you think about it until your bandmates agree on using my help c:'

As soon as she clicked send, she realized she had admitted to having heard some of their music. Well, that was a slip-up for sure. Lightly she gulped as she tried to calm down... After all, he wouldn't step to conclusions, right? It could be anyone on campus! It could be a friend from someone on the campus! There was no relation to her at all. Her steps quickly traveled to her bed as she tried to relax and go to bed, yet her eyes lightly peeked from time to time, wondering if another message would appear.


































bags



clairo










โ™กcoded by uxieโ™ก
 
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