Other What would your useless superpower be?

[Fire At Will]

My true super power is to be awkward in social situations. Sadly, I know I'm not the only one.

 

[MikaboshiEinst]

The power of Total Recall.....of things you dont want to recall.

 

[differentjasper]

To somehow find all the worst songs on a randomized playlist.

But then you can delete them from the playlist and have an amazing playlist!

 

[Elise Ebele]

The ability to spell 'Vehicle', 'Diarrhea', 'Equivalent' and 'License' right on the first try.

I need this

 

[Vagabond Spectre]

The ability to drink gallons of soy sauce and not get sick puking

 

[adrian_]

Super Strength, but i can only lift the same as the nearest person to me.

 

[Wasted Ink]

The ability to wake up no matter what. Thing is, I'd still be tired.

 

[Saccharine Cyanide]

The power to talk to and understand animals, but it only works on gophers.

 

[Neon Valkyrie]

The ability to whisper at super loud volumes.

 

[MikaboshiEinst]

The power of Extreme Hindsight! "I am Captain Hindsight"

 

[Flowiest D]

 

[Flowiest D]

WRONG!

- Extremely useful for working at a bread factory in a future and spotting unauthorized items in bread or either mold growing inside bread.
- Become a performer who uses bread-related items to mysteriously know items that the audience is holding.
- Become a saboteur by hiding behind large piles of bread to spy at other people.
- Bread quality inspector.
- Be able to spot someone hiding behind bread.

- Clean all your clothes instantly and remove all your pocket lint!
- Charge your services to remove lint for the homeless!
- Use your amassed pocket lint as tinder to start a campfire.
- Become a artist who specialises in making sculptures out of pocket lint and sell your creations on the market.
- Sneak a mass of pocket lint into someone's meal and telekinetically manipulate it to press against one of their vital organs, mess up their lungs, choke their trachea, press on their amyglada, cause strokes etc.

- Useful for hiding against law-enforcement who use night-vision googles whilst you mask your heat signature.
- Makes you extremely useful as a saboteur.

- This is basically more of a curse than an actual superpower.

- Cause customer complaints at will and destroy a restaurant that you absolutely hate!
- Ruin a party by causing chips to become stale.
- Be hired and get paid money by scientists who want to study your abilities.

- Useful for navigating caves.
- Useful for navigating dark forests.
- Useful for navigating dark mazes.
- Useful for general luminescence.
- Act as a watchman for a high security facility assisted by the help of a light-detecting sensor that automatically alerts an individual if a person is looking at you.

- Helium balloons can't technically float in a vacumn so this would make you extremely useful for space-related missions that involve gratuitous use of helium-filled balloons.

- Depending on how thorough your ability is to read a goldfish's mind, you can act as a source of secondary data for scientists or university students that want to study goldfish behavior.
- If you own a gold-fish, be able to cater to your fish's needs and desires better than a normal pet-owner could.

- Upload a music video of you moon-walking on the moon and become instantly popular.

- Depending if it's a general radius, this is extremely useful for multi-tasking in general and not wasting your energy on physical movement.

Damn,
That was legato gelato.

 

[Hubub101]

The ability to see in the third person.

 

[demdo_demi]

The power to know what that reference you just quoted is from.

 

[differentjasper]

The power to know what that reference you just quoted is from.

Pass ALL the tests, trivia contests, and oral speeches/exams

 

[rae2nerdy]

looking back two minutes in time. by which i mean you exist in a state that is two minutes behind everyone else.

cat hair magnetism. summon all cat hair in a nearby radius to you.

 

[Fidget]

The ability to touch clothes and render them instantly laundered.

 

[rae2nerdy]

The ability to touch clothes and render them instantly laundered.

That is literally the best superpower. You would be RICH AF with that. All the women asking you to launder their clothes.

 

[Thingi]

warmth, but only to the point of never having to wear more then a hoodie outside in winter

 

[Fidget]

That is literally the best superpower. You would be RICH AF with that. All the women asking you to launder their clothes.

Ha. I thought of that power when I was college and weary of lugging my clothes to the dorm's communal laundry room. We were asked to say our wished for superpowers as an introductory trick in a new course. Most others picked flying/invisibility/shape-shifting.

 

[Freikugel]

I can stop time for the equivalent of human perceived 5 seconds
Sadly that doesn't stop my body to being ruled to time physics, hence I can't do jack shit in stopped time, neither I'm conscious about it

 

[Insanitation]

The ability to transform into a waffle iron at will, but only once and I can't turn back.

 

[hologram]

The ability to find a copy of any movie or TV episode, but only on a severely degraded nth generation copied VHS.



Then again that's probably not quite so useless when it comes to certain bits of lost media where even a nightmarish 15th generation copy is better than having the media be lost entirely.

 

[Shifty Powers]

The ability to hear trees fall when I'm not around.

 

[Madame-Llama]

The ability to shapeshift into anything but only in the form of water