Advice/Help Need Advice; I am a lover of RP's who keeps ghosting partners..

[ChameleonicWanderer]

Hey Everyone!
So I am opening myself up to criticism here but I could go for some advice, even if it's the painful truth as I am, after all seeking advice.
I love to RP and have been doing it for years. Through RP'ing I met someone that I consider a sister and have stories with her that span generations of characters.
Problem is this; when I try to RP now with other people or in forums I can't keep up or I lose the ability to write. I am a very imagniative and creative person but life seems to always get in the way and I lost interest. Worst of all I ghost my partners.
I would love to hear from anyone whose dealt with this and could shed some light.
I want to keep RP'ing but need to figure out how to do it in a manner that works.


I appreciate any and all honest help on this.
-Duck​

 

[Melpomene]

Alright, let me see it I can offer a dollop of knowledge.

To me it sounds like a similar problem I have, you need to make the same connection with others that you have with this one partner. I know that is why I love interest, because I had the experience of having such a connection and now I only want that type of connection when I write or make a story with someone.

I recommend talking to people extensively in OOC chat and getting to know them well before you start the RP. I think that can help you start a friendship which then helps you stay attached to the RP.

 

[rae2nerdy]

So communication is key and in the case of keeping up with other roleplays also have a realistic idea of how much time you can dedicate to a roleplay.

I have an insane real life. I work, I am currently having financial problems, my mom has a lot of health issues, etc. It's pretty much non-stop something popping up and derailing my roleplay. But I embrace the chaos and keep my partners up to date. I'll tell them "hey i'm feeling sick right now and I can't post." or "hey i'm sorry something has come up IRL that I need to take care I'll check in when I have it handled." or sometimes even "hey i am kind of not feeling this idea anymore do you mind if we try to spice it up?"

The key to a roleplay success long term is being willing to be flexible and just commit to communicating honestly with your partners. Just because plan A doesn't work doesn't mean you have to disappear into the ether never to speak again. Some of my longest roleplay partners where people who never had a successful roleplay with me but whom where always willing to come up with a new fun idea whenever we both had a free moment. None of those roleplays lasted for more than a page but we had a blast making up worlds together and just hanging out.

As for being left behind that's just a scheduling thing. If you do not have a consistent time period that your available I highly recommend joining slow posting roleplays. You might think you'll get bored but honestly it gives you more of a chance to get to know the other people rather than stressing out about posting. As people who post only once a week are regularly available for quick OOC chats daily they just don't have the free time to dedicate to a long post.

 

[Ephi]

I've encountered the same issues, and it's why I literally just finally joined here after browsing posts to get a feel for things. I have my long term partner of like 5+ years where things are starting to dwindle down (she's having kids, just no more time, sadly, even if we do chat as friends still). I have one other person I'm friendly with and we are starting to write together and things are going swimmingly - whereas in the past things were failing, and I realize WHY that was happening, now.

The biggest thing, like a few others mentioned already, is connecting with people OOC. Become friends with them - you won't shy away from being honest if the rp is boring, or if you have things going on and need a break. Most people would always rather hear "hey I need time to focus on real life" then to be ghosted completely.

Find someone that suits your personality and interests, then focus on the writing and developing a plot. Writing IS important, and you should both have baseline similarities in style, but the person behind the computer is who will keep you coming back for more.

 

[Crayons]

Ghosting people isn't exactly something beyond your control, like not feeling a roleplay/not finding the right partners. It's pretty easy to just not do it. Just tell your partner you're leaving.

I absolutely feel your pain with trying to find that magical connection, and long lasting RPs you can get lost in.

But really these are two very separate issues and one has a very easy solution.

 

[Ephi]

Ghosting people isn't exactly something beyond your control, like not feeling a roleplay/not finding the right partners. It's pretty easy to just not do it. Just tell your partner you're leaving.

I absolutely feel your pain with trying to find that magical connection, and long lasting RPs you can get lost in.

But really these are two very separate issues and one has a very easy solution.

^ this, too.

 

[ChameleonicWanderer]

Not sure how to tag everyone but I appreciate all your kind words and advice.
I need to be better at communication but am always nervous I will lost that partner.
You guys rock.
-Duck​

 

[Myot]

Getting into anything is hard.