Experiences Increasingly demanding search threads

[CastoffCaptain]

Gurl LOL the only reason I'm not RPing with you RIGHT NOW is because I literally have my plate full every time I post with Malhy--and we have two threads right now @_@

Geezus christ Gaia refugees can you help me to normalize "post sample" requests? I feel liek such a douchebag since it says "it's not that I don't trust you--actually that's exactly what it means but a post can tell me with 90% accuracy if you have what I'm looking for or my compatibility trust me bro and don't craft a post just for me just gimme one of your olds". Dx All these other things, character sheets, image pics, faceclaims, formatting--NONE OF IT MATTERS when I'm trying to figure you out, LEMME SEE YO WRITE FIRST AND THEN WE CAN PROCEED

There's a difference in asking for samples and asking for someone to put a code word into a response. Immensely different, actually--It's the same as if I were to ask someone to play baseball with me and they were in the major leagues and I was still playing whiffle ball in my back yard. There's a skill element involved. There's also the element of, say, if I were to ask someone to watch some TV with me and I just sat down with them without knowing their preferences; I might immediately go for Fox's Exorcist, and my TV buddy might be more on a MLP level. Yes, some of that can be inferred from a person's search thread, but actual writing style? Nope. Samples are important. I ask for them. Am I going to flip out if someone doesn't give them to me and force them to do it? Nope. I might try to still RP with them, but the likelihood that we'll fail soon into the RP goes up exponentially.

The way I ask for it is: please provide samples if you can, so that we can determine if our writing/RPing styles will be compatible. I will give you my own in return.
(Because if I just asked for someone's and didn't return with my own, that'd be arrogant as crap.)

PS. You didn't automatically assume I have a penis. Yay.

 

[unais]

.

Nah. The last thing is from a history of RPing that people from old threads (esp. in Gaia) will be familiar with. Around six years ago on Gaia it started being a pretty typical occurance in group threads for the thread creator to have started putting "By the way I am the God of this RP so treat me as such" as a regular rule that came up through RPs. It was a slight linking of familiar scenarios rather than a delineating of one comment into another one.

That's pretty much your problem with me here. I'm talking about a much larger scale of how things function than the one thing of "these long conditions"

Man I'm an old RPer and have seen some shit. I'm not going to make you draw the lines between how random multi-conditions is an extremely unfocused way of finding a partner and how it causes a history of debilitating spirals (as seen on Gaia) to long and exacerbated partner finding in a completely unproductive way. I literally just said why. Because these things don't fucking do anything useful except to serve one specific purpose that doesn't help the main point of a search thread.

Thing is, I'm able to see beyond the words people are putting down and look at the big picture of their intent. I've also seen the long tail schemes of how these things go down. But because you don't see the history of why these things don't work, you think I'm coming out of nowhere and yelling into the aether.

Basically your comment is: "I don't like your tone, check it for me please". But I'm not pulling any punches. If you think long conditions can be helpful or have their own foundational weight just because they occur frequently, I mean good on you? It's not going to annoy you as much? But I've already seen and experienced the outcomes of how these go over and over again.

.

Right? It's so sadly almost meaningless as much as our interests might align... we all might just be at different writing stages of life xD; I just. Need to see some writing. Not going to flip if you don't have a sample just. Be warned .- .

LOL because you have a dude picture? xD

 

[rae2nerdy]

unais in fairness when i called myself God of the roleplay it was a direct call out to the fact that i did largely x-men / superhero / fantasy things where i would get people who were all - my character controls reality and has the cheat codes to life and the foundations of this [fake? rp? actual? ]universe. and i was all lol bitch i literally created the entire universe in which this roleplay exists. I AM GOD. and thou shalt not take control of my universe away from me.

but it was usually done in a humorous way in like the rules and such. me trying to be funny. cuz when i was for real pissed i stopped being cute and was all. I said no. Now either fix the character or leave. I was hard core not down to win the popularity contests on Gaia. Which probably contributed a lot to my refugee status. I burnt alot of bridges when i stopped taking any crap from anyone. Got a wee bit nasty myself for awhile.

 

[unais]

unais in fairness when i called myself God of the roleplay it was a direct call out to the fact that i did largely x-men / superhero / fantasy things where i would get people who were all - my character controls reality and has the cheat codes to life and the foundations of this [fake? rp? actual? ]universe. and i was all lol bitch i literally created the entire universe in which this roleplay exists. I AM GOD. and thou shalt not take control of my universe away from me.

but it was usually done in a humorous way in like the rules and such. me trying to be funny. cuz when i was for real pissed i stopped being cute and was all. I said no. Now either fix the character or leave. I was hard core not down to win the popularity contests on Gaia. Which probably contributed a lot to my refugee status. I burnt alot of bridges when i stopped taking any crap from anyone. Got a wee bit nasty myself for awhile.

LOL no probs I getcha. I'm defs talking about those crazy motherfuckers who just said it without a lot of creative skewed context. And then without a lot of irony.

Having creative control is SO important in a situation where you busted your ass creating something and need to try and draw a line for people who just want to bring a special snowflake into your world that doesn't fit the parameters you set out.

Geezus Christ you're actually giving me war flashbacks now LOL

 

[CastoffCaptain]

Nah. The last thing is from a history of RPing that people from old threads (esp. in Gaia) will be familiar with. Around six years ago on Gaia it started being a pretty typical occurance in group threads for the thread creator to have started putting "By the way I am the God of this RP so treat me as such" as a regular rule that came up through RPs. It was a slight linking of familiar scenarios rather than a delineating of one comment into another one.

That's pretty much your problem with me here. I'm talking about a much larger scale of how things function than the one thing of "these long conditions"

Man I'm an old RPer and have seen some shit. I'm not going to make you draw the lines between how random multi-conditions is an extremely unfocused way of finding a partner and how it causes a history of debilitating spirals (as seen on Gaia) to long and exacerbated partner finding in a completely unproductive way. I literally just said why. Because these things don't fucking do anything useful except to serve one specific purpose that doesn't help the main point of a search thread.

Thing is, I'm able to see beyond the words people are putting down and look at the big picture of their intent. I've also seen the long tail schemes of how these things go down. But because you don't see the history of why these things don't work, you think I'm coming out of nowhere and yelling into the aether.

Basically your comment is: "I don't like your tone, check it for me please". But I'm not pulling any punches. If you think long conditions can be helpful or have their own foundational weight just because they occur frequently, I mean good on you? It's not going to annoy you as much? But I've already seen and experienced the outcomes of how these go over and over again.



Right? It's so sadly almost meaningless as much as our interests might align... we all might just be at different writing stages of life xD; I just. Need to see some writing. Not going to flip if you don't have a sample just. Be warned .- .

LOL because you have a dude picture? xD

Systemic. It's a systemic thing. Like cancer spreading, it causes debilitation throughout the whole. Preach. People don't believe me when I tell them I've been doing this for long enough that I can see patterns in, well, things like what we're talking about. Or that I can tell with a quick look if someone's going to be compatible with me by their post samples. I've been doing this since I was in college... 1997. If length of time actually meant jack shit about a person's RP quality, I'd be your rock star Methuselah here, y'all. But it doesn't.

And uh, yeah, probably. I don't mind it. It often pleases me when people assume I'm a guy. It probably also has to do with my general typing tone and the fact that I don't have a girly username. You mmmmight remember me on Gaia as NibbleKat. Which might or might not drive a stake of fear/loathing/disgust/constipation into things, but there you are. Once I changed my username there to CastoffCaptain, the confusion began. Here, with my lovely Athelstan as my face? Yep. Very regularly I'm confused for a dude. Which is all fine with me, because I'm absolutely not a girly-girl. And it's about the words, not the gender.

 

[Sunbather]

Nah. The last thing is from a history of RPing that people from old threads (esp. in Gaia) will be familiar with. Around six years ago on Gaia it started being a pretty typical occurance in group threads for the thread creator to have started putting "By the way I am the God of this RP so treat me as such" as a regular rule that came up through RPs. It was a slight linking of familiar scenarios rather than a delineating of one comment into another one.

That's pretty much your problem with me here. I'm talking about a much larger scale of how things function than the one thing of "these long conditions"

Man I'm an old RPer and have seen some shit. I'm not going to make you draw the lines between how random multi-conditions is an extremely unfocused way of finding a partner and how it causes a history of debilitating spirals (as seen on Gaia) to long and exacerbated partner finding in a completely unproductive way. I literally just said why. Because these things don't fucking do anything useful except to serve one specific purpose that doesn't help the main point of a search thread.

Thing is, I'm able to see beyond the words people are putting down and look at the big picture of their intent. I've also seen the long tail schemes of how these things go down. But because you don't see the history of why these things don't work, you think I'm coming out of nowhere and yelling into the aether.

Basically your comment is: "I don't like your tone, check it for me please". But I'm not pulling any punches. If you think long conditions can be helpful or have their own foundational weight just because they occur frequently, I mean good on you? It's not going to annoy you as much? But I've already seen and experienced the outcomes of how these go over and over again.

I'm pretty familiar with Gaia. I've been on the site myself. I didn't enjoy it all that much, but I also have plenty of friends (funnily enough, all of them I met on here first, and then later found out they're from Gaia) that are involved, and know the trends. Some of them disliking Gaia's community, some of them being part of the demographic this topic concerns.

But fine, if you want to put on the internet-adult-pants, let me be more direct, even at the risk of you not "liking my tone": I think what you said is incredibly stupid. You're generalizing a part of a process just because some people overdo it. Not only that, but you also quite literally ignore what I just said and apply your "nah it's like this, I'm right" approach. Like, who are you to say what other people want from their interest checks? I mean, you and I are a perfect example, basically. If someone is so brittle and begins to whine just because I put "If you read this, please sign your sheet as if your character signed a contract" (or whatever, just pulling this for the sake of giving an example), then you're not someone I would want to roleplay with to begin with. Thus, it served the purpose I'm putting it in there for, no? As a nice bonus, if you are so hellbent on not wanting to roleplay with people would would put that there in the first place, then you ALSO get to weed out topics. Is that not fucking amazingly helpful?

Oh, and another thing: "If you think long conditions can be helpful or have their own foundational weight just because they occur frequently" I can't even tell if this is a strawman or we're just talking past each other, but you don't need to argue against *my* specific post, with a specific thing I wanted to adress, with some generalized "great scheme". If I'm saying "Hey, look, this thing is really helpful, why would you act like it's not?" then you replying with some formerly experienced or other, hypothetical scenario, then... that's totally irrelevant?

Btw I'm not deliberately trying to be hostile here (although I hate this "I'm just tellin' it like it is, yeaaah!" attitude, but eh, it probably made me a little sharper than I would've spoken otherwise), and I'm not even disagreeing across the border. Of course that stuff can go overboard, or be used in a tone that is just incredibly snobby and dickish. But generalizing stuff (ESPECIALLY across different communities, but really, even just between different people) is so incredibly unhealthy and narrow-minded.

Oh, and probably don't tell other people what they mean, tends to make you look like a dick.

 

[unais]

Systemic. It's a systemic thing. Like cancer spreading, it causes debilitation throughout the whole. Preach. People don't believe me when I tell them I've been doing this for long enough that I can see patterns in, well, things like what we're talking about. Or that I can tell with a quick look if someone's going to be compatible with me by their post samples. I've been doing this since I was in college... 1997. If length of time actually meant jack shit about a person's RP quality, I'd be your rock star Methuselah here, y'all. But it doesn't.

And uh, yeah, probably. I don't mind it. It often pleases me when people assume I'm a guy. It probably also has to do with my general typing tone and the fact that I don't have a girly username. You mmmmight remember me on Gaia as NibbleKat. Which might or might not drive a stake of fear/loathing/disgust/constipation into things, but there you are. Once I changed my username there to CastoffCaptain, the confusion began. Here, with my lovely Athelstan as my face? Yep. Very regularly I'm confused for a dude. Which is all fine with me, because I'm absolutely not a girly-girl. And it's about the words, not the gender.

HAHAHA FUCK ITS SO accurate LOL A SYSTEMIC DISEASE. You're killing me. Need to stop laughing to myself at work.

GoDDDDD YOU'RE killing it with the accuracy. it's just. Patterns man. It's so true it's like: I know you don't know me, but trust me, I can tell in like ten seconds if I read your post. Just give me a post.

There's this thing when you look at people which is something like "you don't wait and accumulate evidence and build a court case; you look at the patterns for a more accurate read of them".

I've been doing this for like a decade OTL it doesn't mean I'm a great writer yet but I can see patterns cause I was in the TRENCHES LOL

Hmmmno not actually familiar with your past Gaia self I got really... hermitty by the end there when I hit the point of "not putting up with bullshit" faster than some of my friends so I ended up being the thread security bitch half the time... and boy. That lack of tolerance for bad shit xD Really limits your time in a thread LOL

Is it bad that I can usually tell the person by how they talk?

It ended up being all in all: good people ended up being good partners, and bad people ended up being bad partners. xD None of the RP really exists in a vacuum heh

.

Gurl you do you lol

 

[MISTER UN. 0W3N]

//came here from Gaia because of the BBCoding...
I'll say this: I am the type that tortures myself in making aesthetically pleasing threads just because I've gotten to the point that I can make it and be proud (as dumb as that sounds). To me, that just adds to the experience of roleplaying and thread building. The only BBCoding thang I do ask is the ol' Gaia "picture and name of character" dealio. It does help figure out who's who quickly when I'm fucking tired. No need for fancy and can throw it up easily. But, yeah, I despise the whole secret code bullshit to confirm that you read everything. That bothers the shit out of me just because I do miss some things from time to time. It just happens.

 

[Tove]

All the put key words here and there if you read this would turn me off too. That and if there were demands about what picture I could use. I also understand about roleplayers wanting to make sure potential partners have read what is outlined in their request thread.
Either way it can be frustrating.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

All the put key words here and there if you read this would turn me off too. That and if there were demands about what picture I could use. I also understand about roleplayers wanting to make sure potential partners have read what is outlined in their request thread.
Either way it can be frustrating.

It's also not difficult to not read much of a search thread but then find the key words and just put them into your response/PM. So, I don't see how it works in any way.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Exactly if you actually want to make sure people have read your search ask them follow up questions ( or if you're super organized have them fill out an application form )

I used to do that awhile back and it was actually way more helpful than any hidden passcode business.

I basically had a set of questions I would ask anyone who wanted to roleplay with me ( both in the search and when they responded with interest I would ask them )

It wasn't anything like super detailed just like

What Time Zone Are You On?
When Are You Available to Roleplay?
Which of My Ideas Did you Like?
Is there Anything That you won't roleplay?

And that to me is more useful as it actually gets a conversation started. You don't have to have like a stock set of questions either some of that you can just find out organically. But to me it's more important to ask relevant questions in the hopes of narrowing down who fits and who doesn't than worrying about how much attention someone paid to your interest check.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

Exactly if you actually want to make sure people have read your search ask them follow up questions ( or if you're super organized have them fill out an application form )

I used to do that awhile back and it was actually way more helpful than any hidden passcode business.

I basically had a set of questions I would ask anyone who wanted to roleplay with me ( both in the search and when they responded with interest I would ask them )

It wasn't anything like super detailed just like

What Time Zone Are You On?
When Are You Available to Roleplay?
Which of My Ideas Did you Like?
Is there Anything That you won't roleplay?

And that to me is more useful as it actually gets a conversation started. You don't have to have like a stock set of questions either some of that you can just find out organically. But to me it's more important to ask relevant questions in the hopes of narrowing down who fits and who doesn't than worrying about how much attention someone paid to your interest check.

I just talk to people, and if they miss stuff, we talk it out. Application forms for an RP are an auomatic back the hell out for me, though. I find them as objectionable as the rest of what I mentioned in my first post.

Applications seem too formal for something that's supposed to be fun, plus, it has the feel of trying out for something like a sorority-- an elitist feel. I shouldn't have to formally qualify to start an RP.

But that second bit you said? Yes. Talk to your potential partner. That makes perfect sense and is wholly reasonable. I'm a person, not an input.

 

[rae2nerdy]

I just talk to people, and if they miss stuff, we talk it out. Application forms for an RP are an auomatic back the hell out for me, though. I find them as objectionable as the rest of what I mentioned in my first post.

Applications seem too formal for something that's supposed to be fun, plus, it has the feel of trying out for something like a sorority-- an elitist feel. I shouldn't have to formally qualify to start an RP.

But that second bit you said? Yes. Talk to your potential partner. That makes perfect sense and is wholly reasonable. I'm a person, not an input.

I think we might mean different things when we say application. As I'm really only talking about like those three questions I asked above so basically a form that asks

TimeZone
Availability To Roleplay
Ideas You Liked ( usually optional )
Taboos ( things you won't do )

And I'd put that form in the search thread and ask people when they first contacted me to answer those questions ( because surprisingly few people would fill the form out in the thread but if i pm'd it to them they'd usually answer quickly.

So it's less an application as in - here fill out these questions so i know you're good enough. And more a series of questions I'd ask you anyway right when you contacted me I just put them in the thread to jump start a conversation.

 

[thoughtless]

Honestly, I don't find much issue in what they're doing. There are people who would roleplay with that and there are people who wouldn't. Unless they're breaking a site rule or are harassing others for obnoxious reasons then there really isn't a problem with people being demanding. Some just have higher standards than others.

Applications seem too formal for something that's supposed to be fun, plus, it has the feel of trying out for something like a sorority-- an elitist feel. I shouldn't have to formally qualify to start an RP.

Personally speaking, I use applications because more often than not I have a finite number of spots open for the roleplay and I want to choose the characters that are going to make an interesting group dynamic and also so I could screen role players to see who I'm going to be compatible with as a game master. Plus it's a quick way of fixing an issue that a character might have if it's something that goes against the lore/mechanics of the world the roleplay is set in. Again, it's a highly subjective thing and certain people have fun doing different things.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

I think we might mean different things when we say application. As I'm really only talking about like those three questions I asked above so basically a form that asks

TimeZone
Availability To Roleplay
Ideas You Liked ( usually optional )
Taboos ( things you won't do )

And I'd put that form in the search thread and ask people when they first contacted me to answer those questions ( because surprisingly few people would fill the form out in the thread but if i pm'd it to them they'd usually answer quickly.

So it's less an application as in - here fill out these questions so i know you're good enough. And more a series of questions I'd ask you anyway right when you contacted me I just put them in the thread to jump start a conversation.

Ah, I see. I have seen search threads on Gaia that had true application forms-- as in, name, age, character, time zone, which plot you wanted to play, etc.. on and on and on. Those are the types I have an issue with.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

Honestly, I don't find much issue in what they're doing. There are people who would roleplay with that and there are people who wouldn't. Unless they're breaking a site rule or are harnessing others for obnoxious reasons then there really isn't a problem with people being demanding. Some just have higher standards than others.

Personally speaking, I use applications because more often than not I have a finite number of spots open for the roleplay and I want to choose the characters that are going to make an interesting group dynamic and also so I could screen role players to see who I'm going to be compatible with as a game master. Plus it's a quick way of fixing an issue that a character might have if it's something that goes against the lore/mechanics of the world the roleplay is set in. Again, it's a highly subjective thing and certain people have fun doing different things.

Apps in group RPs are probably an absolute necessity for the GM. I'm talking about apps for 1x1s, which to me is highly... Well. What I said on my previous post.

And I don't see the above as people having higher standards-- which would by default imply I have low standards, and believe me, I don't-- I see it as manipulative and unnecessary.

 

[thoughtless]

And I don't see the above as people having higher standards-- which would by default imply I have low standards, and believe me, I don't-- I see it as manipulative and unnecessary.

Calling it manipulative is a large reach tbh. People with those kind of requirements aren't forcing others to do anything, they're most likely looking for like-minded people that are interested in role playing with them. If this was about other role players harassing others into doing what they want then I could understand, but since this is seemingly just about demands for 1x1 rps I don't really see the issue here.

 

[welian]

Can we just form a club for Gaia refugees? Haaa....

I'm worried that I've been contributing to increasingly demanding/elitist RPs here on RPN by doing things Gaian style - elaborate thread layouts, RP applications, and just a general longer-than-average post length (that's not actually that long at all, imo).

 

[CastoffCaptain]

Can we just form a club for Gaia refugees? Haaa....

I'm worried that I've been contributing to increasingly demanding/elitist RPs here on RPN by doing things Gaian style - elaborate thread layouts, RP applications, and just a general longer-than-average post length (that's not actually that long at all, imo).

Doing those (well, not the apps) is fine. Demanding people do the same isn't, in my opinion. You can do the longest posts in history, but it's not fair to make someone else do it. Not that you said you were.

 

[welian]

Doing those (well, not the apps) is fine. Demanding people do the same isn't, in my opinion. You can do the longest posts in history, but it's not fair to make someone else do it. Not that you said you were.

I usually tell people that that they should at least meet the typical quality of my post, since I'm the GM. I typically write 200 to 300 words in a post, which is a far cry from Gaian culture's 600 word baseline for most RPs I'm interested in. >.>

So far, the players who join my RPs tend to write longer posts than I do - so I rely on peer pressure to keep everyone near the quality of writing I like to see in my RPs. It can backfire a lot though, I have players who will refuse to post anything less than perfect, and I just wanna clock them in the face. Or, it backfires on me when someone posts a 2.5k word intro, and I'm just like "motherfucker over here is upstaging the GM!"

I don't think all GMs should have the same standards, either. Variety is the spice of life, isn't it? XD I got my start in those no-profile walk-in tavern RPs, I remember my glorious days of one-liners... so much fun! I want to do a no-app, no-profile RP again sometime here on RPN, maybe get a solid walk-in tavern trend going.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Can we just form a club for Gaia refugees? Haaa....

I'm worried that I've been contributing to increasingly demanding/elitist RPs here on RPN by doing things Gaian style - elaborate thread layouts, RP applications, and just a general longer-than-average post length (that's not actually that long at all, imo).

Ah but yours look really fun tbh. Make me wish I still had some free time to take part. Your royal witches seem super interesting and I've seen your superhero one mentioned several times and I think you did a great job with it.

I think the difference between a detailed roleplay ( what you have ) and an elitist one ( a lot of gaia ) is the attitude. You don't act like people who are maybe not down for all that world building are less worthwhile or bad. It's just hey I made a thing, it's kind of thinky but I think it will be fun. Wanna take a look?

That's letting people choose for themselves where they stand on being able to join. Versus people who are like - if you can't write xxx number of words, make a graphic portfolio for your character, and answer all my secret questions than you're just a totally illiterate n00b and should like never darken the threshold of this site again.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

Ah but yours look really fun tbh. Make me wish I still had some free time to take part. Your royal witches seem super interesting and I've seen your superhero one mentioned several times and I think you did a great job with it.

I think the difference between a detailed roleplay ( what you have ) and an elitist one ( a lot of gaia ) is the attitude. You don't act like people who are maybe not down for all that world building are less worthwhile or bad. It's just hey I made a thing, it's kind of thinky but I think it will be fun. Wanna take a look?

That's letting people choose for themselves where they stand on being able to join. Versus people who are like - if you can't write xxx number of words, make a graphic portfolio for your character, and answer all my secret questions than you're just a totally illiterate n00b and should like never darken the threshold of this site again.

Exactly.

 

[unais]

Calling it manipulative is a large reach tbh. People with those kind of requirements aren't forcing others to do anything, they're most likely looking for like-minded people that are interested in role playing with them. If this was about other role players harassing others into doing what they want then I could understand, but since this is seemingly just about demands for 1x1 rps I don't really see the issue here.

Yeah, if you picture manipulation as only via strong-arming someone I can see how you aren't able to see where she's coming from about how different kinds of manipulation types are employed

For example the tone you used passively trying to persuade CastOff that she's being hyperbolic about the situation is a soft manipulation kind of like how parents and non-physically violent abusive boyfriends use "disappointment" as a soft punishment or negative reinforcement.

js.

Tl; dr she's not wrong and it's not a stretch

Ah but yours look really fun tbh. Make me wish I still had some free time to take part. Your royal witches seem super interesting and I've seen your superhero one mentioned several times and I think you did a great job with it.

I think the difference between a detailed roleplay ( what you have ) and an elitist one ( a lot of gaia ) is the attitude. You don't act like people who are maybe not down for all that world building are less worthwhile or bad. It's just hey I made a thing, it's kind of thinky but I think it will be fun. Wanna take a look?

That's letting people choose for themselves where they stand on being able to join. Versus people who are like - if you can't write xxx number of words, make a graphic portfolio for your character, and answer all my secret questions than you're just a totally illiterate n00b and should like never darken the threshold of this site again.

omg this LOL

 

[thoughtless]

Yeah, if you picture manipulation as only via strong-arming someone I can see how you aren't able to see where she's coming from about how different kinds of manipulation types are employed

For example the tone you used passively trying to persuade CastOff that she's being hyperbolic about the situation is a soft manipulation kind of like how parents and non-physically violent abusive boyfriends use "disappointment" as a soft punishment or negative reinforcement.

Even using that as a base of definition doesn't make her examples in the OP manipulative. Although they show a unwillingness to change and a very fixed mindset when it comes to 1x1's with someone else, to call those examples manipulative would be an exaggeration.

The parent/boyfriend example doesn't work because the situations themselves aren't equal. Frankly, why the hell would you listen or care about what some stranger on the internet wants you to do when it comes to roleplaying when you could just close the tab and continue on with your day. A parent or a boyfriend has a larger emotional influence on you than a stranger does in most circumstances.

However if you took geeking out's example here: "if you can't write xxx number of words, make a graphic portfolio for your character, and answer all my secret questions than you're just a totally illiterate n00b and should like never darken the threshold of this site again." then yes I could agree that it'd be manipulative. Even then I'd argue that it's a select group of people that're like that rather than a rapidly growing number on the site.

 

[CastoffCaptain]

manipulative

[muh-nip-yuh-ley-tiv, -yuh-luh-tiv]

adjective
1.
influencing or attempting to influence the behavior or emotions of others for one’s own purposes: