CastoffCaptain

Its been a while, just wanted to wish you a happy birthday!

Hello there, happy birthday!

Yo. I wrote a book. And uh, it’s getting published in April. There you are.

You're not Blackbeard...

Guess. Who. Just. Got. A PUBLICATION CONTRACT? SMP's gonna publish my novel!

This is my life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mai2dFBKw4g

Just. Dammit.

RPN member question time! If I'm a character in a sleepy coastal setting who is secretly some sort of creature another character would come looking for, what would I be? (and don't say "merman"... done to death!)

Ahgad. I'm done with my story. Now, I'm floating helplessly without a plot, a plan, or a character. What do I do?

Oh. My god. Why is it so hard for me to come up with a title for my manuscript? It's a time travel love story set in a place called Three Star Island. Stars feature heavily in the book. But. My brain... HELP.

Won't some sweet mama come and take a chance with me?

I honestly want to punch my coworker on a daily basis.

OK. Finally I'm getting sold beta readers.

Hrnk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKbHGVF7jlM

Is rage a body type? Because that's me.

Nooooo, Avon takes up to six months to respond.

Yessss, Avon accepts time-travel stories.

I'm the lowest of the low. I'm the sickest of the sick. They let me out the funny farm just to put me in the nick.

zooka zooka zooka zooka zooka

And I'd do anything to make you stay. No light, no light...

Told a guy today to sign in the box on the pinpad at the register. He looked at me and said, "What, do I look Chinese?" Uh. No, now you look like a racist who doesn't make sense.

OH MY GOD I FORGOT WHAT TOMORROW IS. *insert panic-mode Cap*

Well. I pegged it right. My trainee did not return.

Once upon a time I was falling in love. Now I'm only falling apart...nothing I can do! Total eclipse of the hearrrrtttt.

Oh, god. I hope my first impression of my trainee is way off the mark. Argh. Why does Raleigh hire these people???