I hate it when celebrities get on TV and tell us to donate to some fund. Bitch, you make 12 million a movie & I make $7/hr. You send money!
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Ever notice when your eating cereal, the back of the box suddenly becomes super interesting?
"I should change my car horn to sound like gun shots. People would get out of my way a lot faster ."
Has anyone noticed how therapist is spelt. The Rapist. Anyone scared now?
Things not to say while being arrested: I normally do this in the bed room. But the top of your car works too
checking all the status, I can only say; I am amused at what i might have started
If we survive 2012, It's because Chuck Norris saved us
Survey says... I need a vacation
The best way to get to know a woman is thru her hands. For example, if they're locked around your throat, she might be slightly upset.
@Twif, lol im a 24 sorta clock!
people say u r what u eat, but i can honestly say I've never eaten sexy beast in my life.
Procrastinator? No. I just wait until the last minute to do my homework because I will be older, therefore, wiser.
I swear, some girls put on so much make-up, Crayola would be proud.
I woke up today and decided to play Godzilla.
Its time for bed! Pretending to be a fully functioning adult is exhausting..
@Laroe; In my fridge at work, there are sandwichs that could eat me. Many have chatted up me up as i was whipping open the fridge door
@Lareo Nope didn't even consider it lmao, its eat or be eaten at my work
Strange new trend at the office! People are putting names on food in the fridge. Today I ate a ham sandwich named Terry
@Jaytee, there aint no thongs touching my hind end
if you fart while wearing a thong... does it whistle?
Sometimes I squat down to the floor, put my arms around my legs and lean forward. Because, that's how I roll.
Have you found a game that interests you yet? Or are you still lurkin'?
Being crazy is a bit like show & tell. Tell someone you're crazy and they won't believe you. Show them you're crazy & they'll run like hell.
I like to put bubble wrap in between the sheets during sex. Sounds like fireworks, helps my ego.
I wonder if the girls from 16 & pregnant will be on 32 & grandma -
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