This is my first Rp character ever. (Be gentle)

Bob Brawler

Riddle Me this
"Wanna play a game?"


Full Name:



Dante Nissha (before)


Nickname:


Flippy (after)


Age:
206 (with a mentality of a child)


Astrological Sign:


Gemini


Appearance:

le me


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(the sword is a lie)


ze pet (named Gillio)



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Appears to be a short demonic like creature gray skinned with tattoos all over his body,


red eyed bald headed and with a grinning smile and a tail that seems to be as long as he,


with three large fingers he can hold most objects but prefers to use his tail instead and curved legs with two large thumbs to hold his grounds,


he wears quite a few jewelry as three rings on his tail a bracelet on his bicep and two ankle bracelets


and big half golden half silver belt buckle with round objects strapped on his belt which are his weapon of use, they are small bombs with all kinds of alchimic powders and such they variant in poisons, explosive, stunning, sleeping, smoke and incendiary etc...


he wears a saggy shorts with a loincloth and and leather gloves with five diamonds X shaped embedded in them , shirtless yet with a spiked stripe on his spine,


a bird like demonic creature usually sits on his tail the bird seems to have a small tail orange eyes pointy tongue,ears and beak and many small razor like teeth.


Short History:


Dante was born in a village long gone consumed by war, Dante was the son of the village chief and learned from a lot from his father stuff like demonology and spells of such,


when Dante was nine years old war came to his region and all grown men were sent to battle even his father,


weeks has passed and no sign of any of them coming back and so young Dante worried for the well being of his father went to his tent he had kept everything his father taught him in writing he read the book six times yet he saw nothing that could help him,


moments before giving up he remembered seeing in one of his fathers privet collections a ritual about a summoning of a creature that would grant you any wish even though his father told him to forget he ever saw that he thought that he must try for it might be his last chance of seeing his father,


after prepping the ritual Dante said the forbidden incantation "Alukabira Miran Wishton Luminus Lightus"


in a puff of smoke a shadow appeared and said "here i welcome stranger thee answer me these questions three if a wish is what you seek" shaken from what he has just witnessed Dante stood up and accepted the challenge and with a green the shadow spoke "the first question asks your name yet the second wants your gain but the third asks the name of the creature you see today".


Dante quickly answers the first two questions but has no clue of the third he grabs a quick glance at the book laying on the floor and sees a name that reads "Mammon" he quickly shouts the name and demon replies "very well young one you have managed to answer all of three question but one... you see thy name is not Mammon but Marron, Mammon was the name of thy father which was slain by the one named Slade you see im sure you are familiar with said name which is the same as the one you seek to save"


with a small grasp of the situation Dante tried to escape fearing for his life but before he could make a move the Marron locked the tent and whispers "thus you failed the challenge thee now you'll pay the price of three, first ill take your memory then ill take your appearance and finely i shall take your home to do with it as i please and you can go to mine and suffer with the disease" .


being lost in the nether realm confused and with no purpose he started wandering in a hope of finding anything that might still give him hope, after wondering for months he finds a cabin on a small island surrounded by a lake of molten fire and he notices food inside from the cabins window, started walking around the lake yet saw no entrance whatsoever being tired from the journey he saw an figure approaching the lake when all of a sudden the figure disappears and reappears by the cabin,


breaking his head trying to figure out how did he do that with no answer in mind he picked up a pebble and threw it at the cabin after a few tries he hits and breaks a window and said figure looks out the broken window right at the one who used to be Dante and again the figure disappears but now he does not see him when all of a sudden a voice from behind him shouts "who in the heck are you and why have you broken my window" and again shocked from what he had witnessed he could not speak a word but he saw and old man with a long white bushy beard and rugs as cloths,


the old man took a look at him and said "hmm... you look like an imp yet you are not, say little one tell me who you are and if you take my interest i will take you under my wing but if you lie to me i will throw you in to the lake" having heard what the old man just said he thought for a moment and said with a cheerful childish voice "i am terribly sorry old man you see i was cursed by a daemon to take his form after i failed his QUESTIONS THREE hehe and now im lost and my name is... oh i am terribly sorry but i don't seem to recall my name or my origin but please old man do not throw me in to the lake i promise ill repay you for the window i promise" and the old man replied "is that so, you really have picked my interest and ill take you as my apprentice now first thing first lets get to the cabin and change you from those rugs now ill give you some of my power as you saw i can... you can call it teleportation, oh and do not call me an old man i have a name you know call me Cimeies" Cimeies puts his finger on half-imps forehead and his eyes glowing wondering what going on after Cimeies is done he tells him "alright now how about you give it a try" the half-imp looks at the cabin door and focuses he blinks and the moment he opens his eyes he appears flipped up side down and Cimeies standing beside him laughing "HAHAHA not bad for your first time but remember i gave you only a small amount of my power so you can jump only to where your eyes can see and since you dont have a name how about ill call you Flippy".


Flippy now began to live with Cimeies learning from him about alchemy and weaponry and he managed to create those small bombs after 150 years of studying under Cimeies, Cimeies told him "well i have nothing more to teach you Flippy and i am afraid my time is here now i must ask you to leave me be and set out on a journey of your own but before you leave i have two gifts for you the first one is this little one i found him on my trip to the city of the dead it is a demonic bird i named him Gillio cause his teeth are sharp like a guillotine very adorable they really connect to the first one they touch and he will be your partner for your journey and the second gift is a way" having no clue of what he means he takes the cage and Cimeies speaks the finale words he ever herd from him "goodbye young one my time with you was the best finale years anyone could have asked for i bid you fare well and remember me and dont be sad and have fun" with tears in his eyes forgetting about the second gift he hugged Cimeies for a brief moment before he saw something bright he looked up and he saw what looked like a sun he saw green trees and skys of blue and a lot of colorful flowers understood he was in the world above and remembered Cimeies's finale words "dont be sad and have fun" having wiped his tears he embarked on his journey.


47 years after returning to his world, and now little Flippy and his feathery buddy Gillio sleeping on a branch having had adventured far and wide and full treasures that they found.


Personality:


playful


cheerful


open minded


caring for those he likes


no sense of right or wrong


Flaws:


disliked by most for his attitude


bit gullible


too caring for those he likes


Likes:


shiny objects


sweets


animals


fooling around


jokes


Dislikes:


mean people


vegetables


liars


showers


riddles


Powers/Abilities:


knowledge of alchemy


teleportation (only where the eye could see)


Species: ex human now imp


Extra Information: Flippy has no real need to feed or drink but still loves to eat sweets .


 
It's a good start, from what I've read - but it's a little hard to read/follow fully, without punctuation/capitalization. I'd love to review it more thoroughly, if you're up for revising those issues?
 
sure sounds great, English is not my first language but i try my best and i would love to (and i have gotten better since then)
 
I'm always impressed by anyone writing something extensive like this when English isn't their first language. Respect, man.


Like Elle said, punctuation and capitalization would really help, even without more in-depth grammatical revision than that.


As far as the character goes, I'm wondering how his interactions with others play out. Is the world he exists in made up of a variety of creatures, or is it largely populated by humans who aren't used to seeing anyone with Flippy's...unique appearance? Is it a very high-fantasy setting with many different species?


Do you have his 47 year journey planned out or is it left largely to the imagination? How have Flippy's experiences over his 206 years of life affected him in regards to his personality?


Overall I think it would be interesting to RP with a character like this. His long past would certainly give him the opportunity to tell some interesting stories, I'm sure. :)
 
Actually most of what you asked was to be answered in the Rp... Until it sort of died, but yes very high fantasy even had a city that was mostly creatures. (if you want to see what I'm talking about, its called "The Reclaiming")


1. About the 47 years first thought nothing of it, but then I figured to tie it in with the main antagonist, that I have some history with the bad guy. (dropped some clues here and there until the time was right)


2. About his personality, well more like mental health, right by the end he had sort of rage attack after the main protagonist got hurt, since he still was in the mentality of a young kid he was mostly A KID... But after seeing her get hurt its like all of his misfortune broke out and he was really... Angry I guess im not sure how to describe it, but I did give him more in depth story on those 47 years, like people betraying him and such.


(side note all the rhymes are original... Mostly)
 
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1--Nice, it was a clever idea to establish Flippy's relationship with the antagonist during that time.


2--Just looking at the last page of your RP definitely gives a glimpse of his behavior when he's upset, yeah. Poor kid/206-year-old.


And ooh--rhyming in a foreign language sounds tricky.
 
wait although if you mean this line "Alukabira Miran Wishton Luminus Lightus"


then this is just something i whipped out it has no real meaning... xD
 
I was thinking more about the meter of the shadow creature's speech. It seemed like there was some rhythm to it. Eheh, either way. :P
 

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