Other Rant of somesort that'll probably get deleted

[NotinthisUniverse]

I dunno where this'll go its just ne writing out my thoughts rn cause I dunno how else to release how I'm feeling I guess? I've always struggled when it came to dealing with ny emotions, always keeping it bottled up until I have an outburst which includes me either: crying, having a full panic attack, or just having a nervous breakdown. Its not healthy I know, but I hate opening up, I feel guilty about it, I feel exposed, its just bad and I try my best to stay away from harming myself in anyway since I've struggled with that before. Its like a coping thing I guess, um just writing this out is making me anxious- I've struggled with just communicating how I'm feeling most of the time usually saying the following: "I'm fine." "It's nothing." "I'm tired." Which is totally bs, but I say it anyway so I can get through the day without having to dove into my emotions. I belittle or ignore or sometimes even keep myself occupied so I don't think. When I think, usually overthinking and worrying and the big what if's of whatever scenario thats irrational af in my noggin. When that happens it ends with me hyperventilating and crying and just its a big ass mess tbh. I just don't know wtf I'm doing or feeling, just this blank empty feeling that i just cant pinpoint. Whatever, if you got this far congrants and heres a virtal cookie.

 

[Minako]

I... uh... damn, this is too relatable...

 

[NotinthisUniverse]

I'm so embarrassed I'm surprised you read all that lol its total bs. It's a mess too, I thought I could delete this but nope its gonna be up there sooo anyway I guess I'm glad my rant or vent or whatever that was actually something someone was feeling or could relate too. So thats cool.

 

[Cinder_Rabbit]

I'm so embarrassed I'm surprised you read all that lol its total bs. It's a mess too, I thought I could delete this but nope its gonna be up there sooo anyway I guess I'm glad my rant or vent or whatever that was actually something someone was feeling or could relate too. So thats cool.

I'm not sure if you would find it comforting knowing that you arnt the only one that feels this way dude, but for me and Minako it seems this hits quite close to home Keep your head held high dude. Hope you feel better soon.

 

[NotinthisUniverse]

Your so sweet, thanks its really nice knowing that your not the only one who feels this way.

 

[Cinder_Rabbit]

Your so sweet, thanks its really nice knowing that your not the only one who feels this way.

If ever you would like to talk or just unload things, I'm always happy to listen Ill even join in!

 

[NotinthisUniverse]

If ever you would like to talk or just unload things, I'm always happy to listen Ill even join in!

Aww, thanks

 

[Soulless]

You aren't alone. Sometimes the most complicated things we experience can be our own emotions. But know that there are people to reach out to you, that your existence is wanted, that your future is waiting for you, accompanied by some amazing people that you haven't met yet. I know it might sound unrealistic, I know, because I believed it was impossible as well. I had panic attacks at school, panic attacks at home, episodes of anxiety and heavy breathing. It was like a whirlwind. But looking back on it, I actually feel glad it happened. I'm happier person because it allowed me to meet such amazing people at the mental institution I was hospitalized at and being able to understand people more. I'm not sure if that helps, but just want to let you know that I'm avaliable if you ever just want to vent or talk about things and that you're not alone

 

[NotinthisUniverse]

Oh my gosh, y'all are so sweet. I'm chessing so hard its making my cheeks hurt, seriously I can't thank you enough for your responds. I'll try my best to talk to my family about it and see where that gets me.

 

[Yoounua]

You have my full support budddy this is very relatable because I'm not very good with my emotions either. I know it's hard but I think rather than trying to ignore your feelings you should try to explore them a little bit? If anything to learn to avoid things that can stress you out or make you upset. I hope you're doing well and continue to do so

 

[buttermyeggroll]

Hello stranger! I'm sorry about what you're going through rn but you see my dude i got mental problems so i feel ya all the way like i still cant control all of my emotions even with medication or therapy but things did get better for me and they can for you to. I wish the best for you, have a good day.

 

[NotinthisUniverse]

Once again thank you for your sweet comments seriously my cheeks hurt from smiling haha