Other LGBTQ People?

Assailant said:
So, like, if someone identified as something other than the male/female binary, it would fall outside the limits of bisexuality but be within the parameters of pansexuality? Or does it mean that someone who is transexual would not be attractive to someone who is bisexual, but still could be for someone who is pansexual?

Sorry if I seem ignorant, this is all just a bit confusing.
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To add a little bit, from what I've heard (I may be wrong), bisexual just means being attracted to two genders, not necessarily just male and female. If you are attracted to, for example, specifically males as well as agender people, but no other genders, then you are still bisexual because 'bi' means two. Although, most people who prefer bisexual over pansexual do not fit that example because they do not believe in genders outside of the gender binary and therefore do not find pansexuality necessary. Pansexuality encompasses all genders, including nonbinary genders.

I personally identify as pansexual because I do believe in nonbinary genders and also because I've never really been aware of a person's gender in general, not just in terms of attraction. It's just not something that comes to mind when I encounter another person, and so I thought pansexual fit me better than bisexual.
 
Bisexual gal here!

I’ve noticed lately that I tend to think of most of my characters as bisexual as well, especially in rps or any collaborative writing where I’m not necessarily sure if a character might have any romance, or with who- And I’m not sure if this is just a writing strategy for flexibility, or if it’s my default because of my own experience, or both? Anyone else notice how their identity as an LGBTQI+ person influences their writing?
 
Assailant said:
Maybe a bit out of place here to ask another question, but does anyone mind telling me the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality? I'm kinda new to the LGBT community, and even before I identified as one I've been trying to figure out the differences and been struggling.
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I’m also gonna try to shed some light on the ‘bisexual or pansexual’ thing because it can for sure be a confusing distinction to a lot of people, and the use of one or another is often connected to your local community culture and broader LGBTQI+ history and politics- Though keep in mind, I’m no authority on the matter! Most of this is my own understanding based on queer theory I’ve read and conversations I’ve had with other people (mostly bi and pan friends and colleagues, but also people who consider themselves attracted to only one gender). Sorry this got so long!


Your sexuality is just as much about you as it is about the people you might be interested in- If someone says ‘I’m homosexual’ or ‘I’m heterosexual’ and you don’t know anything else about that person- such as their own gender identity- then you can’t really know the gender of the people they are attracted to, if that makes sense?


I consider myself bisexual because I am attracted to ‘two’ types of people- Those who are of a similar gender identity to myself, and those who are of a different gender identity than myself. This includes ladies and fellas of all variety, people who are neither or both or change on occasion or haven’t decided!


A friend of mine is comfortable with he/him pronouns and being perceived as masculine, but he doesn’t really identify as a guy and generally doesn’t find gender to be something he is interested in applying to himself- He changed from identifying as bisexual to pansexual after he became more comfortable with this view of his own (non)gender, as a reflection of the fact that he doesn’t really consider anyone else’s gender inherently ‘similar’ or ‘different’ to his own.


Another friend of mine also uses pansexual- She’s fought very hard to be recognized as a woman and considers her own identity to be within the commonly-understood binary, so in this case she doesn’t use ‘pan’ as a reflection of her own gender. When I’ve talked to her about it, we came to the conclusion that where I use bi to mean attracted to ‘people of any gender’, she uses pan to mean ‘regardless of gender’. It may seem like a small distinction (to me, at least!) but it’s important to her so that’s how she identifies.


Basically- bisexuality and pansexuality are very similar, and why you might chose to use one or the other is usually just because of a personal choice. Neither is inherently more queer than the other, and it’s important to remember that the way you perceive the difference between the two may not be the way someone else distinguishes them- And that’s usually fine!


What gets less fine is when we enforce our own view of the distinction on others and try to monitor how they identify and when and how they are allowed to ‘change’ labels- People are not fixed points, and neither is sexuality! How you do and do not define your sexuality is up to you, and deciding to identify in a new way doesn’t necessarily mean you were ‘wrong’ previously, anymore than a growth spurt means you were measuring incorrectly before or finding a new favorite movie invalidates your enjoyment of your old one.


Hope that is somewhat helpful! And congratulations on embracing the new things you are learning about yourself <3
 
Thought I was lesbian, but wife says I'm trans, so maybe I'm straight, who frickin' knows lol. I don't really care? I love her, she loves me, we're a happy family. ?
 
panromantic asexual, but i went lesbian as hell this year, so i guess i prefer females, or at least lean more towards them.
 
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