Fandom (Glitch Techs Xpanded Universe) GTX: Gnu Fork

[Gadg8eer]

Spoiler: Rules

All rules of RPNation apply. Other than that, nothing specific need be mentioned.

---

Grand Forks, Canada
2028/06/21 @ 528 Beets

"Finally, our last entrant for the region..." the announcer - a local - spoke, but wasn't given enough time to retract their words before the entrant stepped on stage.

"Hi, I'm known as Gadg8eer on the Hiverse" the young man said, nervous but hoping that presenting what he considered his greatest achievement would be enough. Practically every kid, teenager and young adult had showed up to the event at city park being sponsored by the Hinobi Corporation, a startup called "SkleatShoes", and the local Hinobi Store 10,810 in Grand Forks, BC... Also known as the "Gnu Forks store" because it was not actually an official Hinobi store, but a local shop that registered with the "Hinobi Affiliate" repair shop partnership program, and because of a sign on the front labelled "GNU Fork Computers" on the front.

There was a cough in the crowd as the whole town just stared. Many of them didn't care for him or his family. His dad, who volunteered at the local homeless shelter, was hated by the anti-homeless City Council. His mother had a friend who was a common law widow of a man whose wealthy grandkids with his ex-wife were trying to steal the inheritance of said friend/common law wife. His younger brother had been the kind of person to use his wit to drive away bullies at Grand Forks Secondary School.

And himself? He was always the one who spoke out against anything unjust, the one who got kicked out of a writer's guild who would rather cater to a 40-something woman who hated men, than the young outcast from the outcast family who said "No, you're making an excuse to not save starving children in developing nations so that you can also claim that I'm selfish for wanting to be equal to my classmates! Life should be fair!"

He had been blocked from the internet and video games in 2001 until 2003 by some government official who had him taken away from his family and put in a foster home for being allowed to play video games after he fought back physically against verbal bullies in school one too many times and a "concerned parent" threw the whole town into a moral panic about the situation.

While the guy who owned the store was nice, the general population of the town both young and old (especially old, as the town was mostly one big retirement community) had very little appreciation for the technology store that was only allowed into town because it was a local business and not a franchise.

As for Gadg8eer, the town hated him for his past. He honestly wished he could be 10 years old again and forever, as a way of proving he was willing to give up his large frame to ensure he would never be the large angry threat they thought he was, and to try and get a second chance at childhood, but much like in Nobipunk 2077, that kind of immortality was reserved for those who could afford the ridiculous price tag. Of course, for once they didn't matter. Hinobi's panel of judges, who drove in from Vancouver just to make a decision, were the ones who would be deciding whether he could win a free permanent license for a plixel avatar.

"Um... I made this." he said, and loaded up a file he'd saved to the local storage of his nobiGlas, a smartwatch based on the ones featured in Star Captain and Crallout 4.0 and one of Hinobi's many, many products.

The huge screen that had been set up in city park for displaying the entries loaded up Nobi's Skylines, and the data - a perfect replica of his hometown in the game - was loaded. As he continued his presentation, he made a big deal of showing the exact same issues that the real town was suffering were replicated in the game purely by the accuracy of Hinobi's city simulation game.

Several of the judges wrote down some notes as he nervously stepped off the stage prematurely. "Thank you, Gadg8eer. The judges will now convene..."

---

Spoiler: Explanation of Map and Personal Safety for Everyone

Just so everyone can rest easy, the map is NOT of my current residence at all. I used to live in the area depicted, but that has not been the case in several years and I will NEVER reveal my current location on the internet. I chose the town because I'm intimately familiar with it and its vaguely similar to Bailley, and I do not recommend ever revealing your current location to me or any other player in this RP at any point.

Consider the map to be like the map of Bailley and Dabney that the Glitch Techs fandom have tried to make for continuity-checking (and because it's fun). Please PM me if you are a player and want edit access to the map!

---

Grand Forks, Canada
2028/06/28 @ 407 Beets

A week later, Oliver "Gadg8eer" Kind was feeling stressed and down, thinking that he'd been a fool for thinking he could ever win that competition. While he'd been happy that his luck had been unexpectedly good so far, it seemed to have finally run out.

He'd initially been glad to get the chance to draw his ideal Hiverse avatar for the regional contest that had earned him an 80% off discount on a "Smarthome Starter Pack" and a spot in the regional "Craftworks Faire", solely due to having the only avatar that went well with the SkleatShoes that were being advertized a lot that summer and were a requirement for the submission to be accepted.

His virtual copy of Grand Forks then won him the regional contest, for which his prize had been to have his two submissions combined into a single entry and placed alongside 12 others from all over Canada in the National Semifinals. The top 3 finalists would have a famous boutique avatar creator make their ideal VR avatar into a (virtual) reality. The winners' avatar image submissions would be turned into an actual avatar file, able to be used in any Hinobi VR game and in the Hiverse, Hinobi's wildly successful metaverse project. The first place finalist would receive a much more coveted and rare prize...

The semifinals were supposed to be resolved the day before, and sure enough he'd not received any notifications. He sighed and refreshed his email for the nth time, about to finally decide to give up.

That was when he spotted a little icon next to his spam email inbox. "Great, spammers probably sent me a bullcrap message about how a Beebay package was not paid for and so they didn't deliver it."

He tapped the part of the holographic screen containing the spam folder, and suddenly he blinked.

From: noreply@hinobi.ca
To: o.kind@bmail.com
Subject: Hinobi of Canada Texpo Contest Submission ("Grand Forks, BC")
Congratulations, Gadg8eer! You won 1st place in the Canadian division of the Hinobi Global Hi-Texpo for your submission of a Nobi Skylines replica of Grand Forks, British Columbia!

Your custom avatar - featuring the prize from our mutual sponsor, SkleatShoes™, a pair of Skleat convertible cleats/roller skates - has been converted into a plixel avatar (retail value $18,000,000 CAD) which can be permanently installed using the attached app in this email. Please send your response to me at hi-texpo@hinobi.ca if you have any issues or would like to request that a different avatar be used.

Additionally, you have been granted the option of taking a job in our elite Glitch Techs tech support team in your area! Please speak with Edward Davenport at GNU Fork Computers for more information.

Thanks for your participation!

- Inspector #9, Hinobi of Canada

Spoiler: View attachment

He immediately double-tapped the attached file, and was greeted with a message...

Are you sure you wish to apply this Plixel Avatar? This can be tested for 10 minutes, after which it cannot be undone, only be changed by applying a different avatar!

He applied the avatar and then, in the voice of a 10 year old, yelled a joyful "Woo!" at the top of his lungs.

After getting over the excitement, he took a few minutes to try out the avatar and was completely satisfied. He noticed his new plixel avatar came with a few additions compared to his Hiverse avatar, such as a pair of Hinobi SpyWear augmented reality display goggles and a Hinobi RumblePack - a backpack containing the components of a gaming PC, allowing him to essentially have the processing power of a gaming rig at all times - that stored real world objects digitally using the relatively new plixel technology.

There was one odd thing about it, however. His gloves were able to summon the yo-yos he used as weapons in the Nobiverse, and had two mysterious sets of buttons on the index fingers and an additional set on the thumbs. The first set turned out to be for controlling his Skleats, a product which could convert between roller skates and cleats by extending and retracting their mag-suspended wheels.

He tested the red buttons that controlled the Skleats and felt the familiar sensation of the wheels pushing downwards and rotating 90-degrees to be able to roll on the ground. The other two buttons on the index finger seemed to do nothing at all, oddly enough.

The final pair, however, caused a warning message to pop up...

Warning!
You are about to activate your jetpack for the first time! Do not try this indoors!

Do you wish to proceed?
[ ] Do not show this again
[No] [Yes]

"Oh boy, that was close..." Gadg8eer sighed in relief, tapping the "Do not show this again" checkbox and then the "No" button, grateful to whatever literal genius made sure he hadn't just slammed himself into the ceiling by accident.

As it was near the end of the school year, Perley Elementary wouldn't have any actual kids nearby, so he was about to skate a few blocks away to go on the swings when he received a call from GNU Fork Computers...

"Hi?" he asked.

"Is this Gadg8eer?" Edward Davenport's voice asked on the other end.

"Yeah, but... Eddy, right? I'm the guy who keeps paying for service house calls about my smarthome stuff, sorry about that." Gadg8eer responded.

"No problem. Can you come down to the shop right away? It's about that job you were offered."

"Oh. So, I'm not able to have it?"

"Actually, it's that this job is a bit more important of a job than you think." Eddy explained. "We're actually having a staff meeting right now that you'd need to be part of."

"Uh... sure, I guess. I was going to take up the offer anyway. Thanks for letting me know!"

---

After flying from his bedroom window to the GNU Forks store, he landed in front of the store where a couple other people were waiting...

---

Spoiler: You have (1) unread notifications!

I promised you I'd stick with you for this.

I haven't seen Glitch Techs, but plot and concept-wise, I'm interested!

This interests me.

 

[Lord Moldoma]

Seemingly waiting outside was a seemingly not nearly as advanced machine body, likely being remotely operated by someone. It was tapping away on a portable console of the Hinobi Brand. Although the console had clearly been physically modified with an attachment that fit into the SD slot and created a secondary screen. There were various scratches across the unclothed parts of her body and she didn't actually have any hair.

She was dressed in a white button-up shirt with a dark teal-gray front placket. She wore a light pink ribbon tied around her neck in a bow, with a pale beige pleated skirt. On top of this, she wore a one-button dark teal-gray hooded cardigan with gray horizontal lines running across the hem and sleeves. Her hood had pointed ears on the top and four pink eye-like markings on the front, resembling a cat. Around her legs were black thigh-high socks and light pink Mary-Jane style shoes with white soles.

She was completely absorbed in the game, and looked up only briefly to see Gadg8 before returning to her game. Her body had at least one illegal modification that Gadg8 might've recognized, the only one he'd be able to detect. A scan-jammer. The kind that was used in military grade operations or by people who participated in black-market remote-robot fighting rings.

Why someone would send their battle-body to a Job-meeting at a hinobi-corp-store... Well, actually, I shouldn't say that was beyond Gadg8... He probably could guess a few ideas.

Namely, that this person may have been recruited specifically for their prowess in black market rings. Hinobi wasn't above doing underhanded stuff to ensure their quality of product.

Then again, why the girly outfit? Why a TV screen? Why were they more interested in playing a video game rather than talking to the person who had a top of the line Plixel Avatar that had just arrived via a jetpack.

Gadg8 Barely had a moment to wonder, before...

"ASS! 3:42 AGAIN? THIS CONSOLE IS A COWA-FUCKIN'-PIECE-OF-BULLSHIT!" The console creaked in the robot's hands, no doubt improved for a combination of a master-martial-artists level of dexterity and a tacti-body's level of strength. This girl was so mad she made up her own words, and spouted them out through an echoey last-gen mechanical voice. I guess if you have a battle body, a top of the line voice modulator is both beyond your budget and completely unnecessary.

She restrained herself from breaking it. Even if she was a prize-fighter like Gadg8 might've guessed, she was probably too poor to afford a new modded console.

She sighed, which sounded weird with the mechanical echo and turned off the console, sliding it into her breast-pocket.

She turns to Gadg8 "Hey, you. Judging from that whack ass Plixel Avatar of yours, I assume you're some rich-kid who's parents made them get a job to build character. I've seen that before. If you feel like humoring me is worth it, tell me something. That body of yours is made of hard light, right? Why do you need a jetpack to fly? Light is light, it naturally moves faster than escape velocity. Shouldn't you just be able to fly on command?"

 

[Gadg8eer]

Seemingly waiting outside was a seemingly not nearly as advanced machine body, likely being remotely operated by someone. It was tapping away on a portable console of the Hinobi Brand. Although the console had clearly been physically modified with an attachment that fit into the SD slot and created a secondary screen. There were various scratches across the unclothed parts of her body and she didn't actually have any hair.

She was dressed in a white button-up shirt with a dark teal-gray front placket. She wore a light pink ribbon tied around her neck in a bow, with a pale beige pleated skirt. On top of this, she wore a one-button dark teal-gray hooded cardigan with gray horizontal lines running across the hem and sleeves. Her hood had pointed ears on the top and four pink eye-like markings on the front, resembling a cat. Around her legs were black thigh-high socks and light pink Mary-Jane style shoes with white soles.

She was completely absorbed in the game, and looked up only briefly to see Gadg8 before returning to her game. Her body had at least one illegal modification that Gadg8 might've recognized, the only one he'd be able to detect. A scan-jammer. The kind that was used in military grade operations or by people who participated in black-market remote-robot fighting rings.

Why someone would send their battle-body to a Job-meeting at a hinobi-corp-store... Well, actually, I shouldn't say that was beyond Gadg8... He probably could guess a few ideas.

Namely, that this person may have been recruited specifically for their prowess in black market rings. Hinobi wasn't above doing underhanded stuff to ensure their quality of product.

Then again, why the girly outfit? Why a TV screen? Why were they more interested in playing a video game rather than talking to the person who had a top of the line Plixel Avatar that had just arrived via a jetpack.

Gadg8 Barely had a moment to wonder, before...

"ASS! 3:42 AGAIN? THIS CONSOLE IS A COWA-FUCKIN'-PIECE-OF-BULLSHIT!" The console creaked in the robot's hands, no doubt improved for a combination of a master-martial-artists level of dexterity and a tacti-body's level of strength. This girl was so mad she made up her own words, and spouted them out through an echoey last-gen mechanical voice. I guess if you have a battle body, a top of the line voice modulator is both beyond your budget and completely unnecessary.

She restrained herself from breaking it. Even if she was a prize-fighter like Gadg8 might've guessed, she was probably too poor to afford a new modded console.

She sighed, which sounded weird with the mechanical echo and turned off the console, sliding it into her breast-pocket.

She turns to Gadg8 "Hey, you. Judging from that whack ass Plixel Avatar of yours, I assume you're some rich-kid who's parents made them get a job to build character. I've seen that before. If you feel like humoring me is worth it, tell me something. That body of yours is made of hard light, right? Why do you need a jetpack to fly? Light is light, it naturally moves faster than escape velocity. Shouldn't you just be able to fly on command?"

"I literally make less than $0 a year! I don't know why you're here, but I'm here to actually get a job so I can afford to buy stuff! If society expects me to be more mature, then why the hell do you get to judge me for the only thing I've ever done that I actually succeeded at?!" Gadg8eer shouted, suddenly furious. "If I was one of those rich spoiled brats, do you think I would have chosen to be , or this?! Yes, I like my avatar, but I can't stand when other people hate my avatar just because they have a vendetta against someone who doesn't want to be responsible for someone else's life! I never had any reason to do anything that might end up with me becoming an accidental father, and people still expect me to take care of my parents and work a 10 hour work day?!"

 

[Lord Moldoma]

"I literally make less than $0 a year! I don't know why [Iyou're[/I] here, but I'm here to actually get a job so I can afford to buy stuff! If society expects me to be more mature, then why the hell do you get to judge me for the only thing I've ever done that I actually succeeded at?!" Gadg8eer shouted, suddenly furious.

"Do I look like I can guess what you've achieved in your life? I make judgements ahead of time because I'm usually right. If a game sucks, that becomes apparent in the first couple of minutes to hours of playtime. And if someone has a Plixel avatar, 99/100 they're rich. Not that that sample size even exists yet." She says.

"I get to judge you because you're in my general vicinity. I get to voice my judgements, because I have a voice box."

"Would you assume someone who rides around everywhere they need to go in a private helicopter to be rich if you saw it? I have a feeling you would. Same principle. So calm your tits."

Her voice was somewhat venomous. She clearly had a lot of built up envy and toxins to spew out of her mind. Hopefully she was just redirecting her anger after playing a shitty game... hopefully...

 

[Gadg8eer]

"Do I look like I can guess what you've achieved in your life? I make judgements ahead of time because I'm usually right. If a game sucks, that becomes apparent in the first couple of minutes to hours of playtime. And if someone has a Plixel avatar, 99/100 they're rich. Not that that sample size even exists yet." She says.

"I get to judge you because you're in my general vicinity. I get to voice my judgements, because I have a voice box."

"Would you assume someone who rides around everywhere they need to go in a private helicopter to be rich if you saw it? I have a feeling you would. Same principle. So calm your tits."

Her voice was somewhat venomous. She clearly had a lot of built up envy and toxins to spew out of her mind. Hopefully she was just redirecting her anger after playing a shitty game... hopefully...

"No. No you don't. Because neither do I. Nobody ever cares what I-"

"Ahem." Davenport cleared his throat from the open glass doorway.

 

[Lord Moldoma]

“Consider this your saved by the bell moment Wiz.” The combat robot says. Deciding to nickname Gadg8 ‘Wiz’ since that feels like it’d fit his appearance.

She turns, casually looking Davenport up and down, assessing him. “So let me guess, from the demeanor, you’re my mister who right?” She asks. “Why’d ya ask me over the wires to bring my ‘A-Game’ again? Does hinobi really need to go looking in the dregs of society to find someone to guard their megacorp secrets? Can’t ya just, I don’t know, do what other corporations like Enom and Tactitech do and subcontract that stuff to drones?” She gets straight to the point.

“Sure I’m a gamer and I’ve played most of the big releases from Hinobi. But you’d have to dig pretty deep into my online footprint to get any idea that I’m one in the same with the robot you’re seeing now… well… not literally one in the same from a fusion perspective. But I think you understand my meaning.”

“So the question is… why me in particular? Why a girl who constantly brain dances in VR and streams foul mouthed playthroughs of video games…?”

 

[Gadg8eer]

"Ever played New Weird Order: Site Director Simulator?" the so-called 'mister who' asked. "You're both going to want to step inside for this... The name's Eddy Davenport, but you can just call me Dave."

 

[Lord Moldoma]

"New Weird Order..." She thinks for a moment. Probably going through her stream archive. "Oh yeah. I played that one once. April 7th, 2019. It was for a sunday charity-stream. Any donations that day went to their lawsuit defense fund against someone in Russia trying to make profits off of New Weird Order by claiming copyright, despite it being creative commons worldwide."

"Don't know why you bring it up. Unless you're about to tell me that the massive corporation you work for hunts down demons or something." She says. "Wouldn't be too out of the question. Considering the world we live in today."

 

[Gadg8eer]

"New Weird Order..." She thinks for a moment. Probably going through her stream archive. "Oh yeah. I played that one once. April 7th, 2019. It was for a sunday charity-stream. Any donations that day went to their lawsuit defense fund against someone in Russia trying to make profits off of New Weird Order by claiming copyright, despite it being creative commons worldwide."

"Don't know why you bring it up. Unless you're about to tell me that the massive corporation you work for hunts down demons or something." She says. "Wouldn't be too out of the question. Considering the world we live in today."

"Wait, is that the game based off of that creepypasta wiki?!" Gadg8eer responded, suddenly nervous.

"Stay calm, you won't be fighting a baphomet with a chainsaw or be put on keter duty. It's more of a... tech support job."

"I swear to god, if this is like The Primatrix Online and I wake up to a birth allegory so thick you could cut it with a knife, or the real world is like Cherubim: The Demonetization with its Machina Deus and magiclockwork drone angels..."

"...not really. Ever play Swarm Fortress 2?" Dave pointed out.

"A little?" Gadg8eer responded.

"XenoSquad?"

"...no? I know you lead a team to stop alien invaders in that one?"

"Captain Corporate and the Marketeers?"

"...no."

"Hogwash Academy?"

"No."

"Social Eyes?"

"No."

"Oneiros 5?"

"From that weird Shin Hinobi Tensei spinoff? No."

"...Hinobilis: A Beginner's Guide to Divinity?"

"That's a tabletop roleplaying game!" Gadg8eer pointed out.

"...Kids in Defiance: Operation Splatling Gum?"

"Oh yeah!" Gadg8eer pointed out.

"God damn it." Dave sighed, and gestured to follow him into the building.

Once they made it to the back of the store, Dave put on a bulky gauntlet, resembling a ShellTec Bit-Boy 3000 straight out of Crallout: Route 66, but more modern in aesthetic. He pointed at the wall of the staff room and tapped the touch screen of his gauntlet. Suddenly, a portal opened on the wall...

"Woah! Coooooool!" Gadg8eer responded. "...what is it?"

"...its a portal. Isn't that obvious?" Dave pointed out, and gestured to follow him through it.

On the other side was a surprisingly spacious high-tech environment, which judging by the aesthetic was created by Hinobi.

"Welcome to Glitch Techs HQ." Dave introduced them to their workplace. "Or at least this store's licensed copy of Glitch Techs HQ. The job may have perks, but knowing the true scale of Glitch Techs operations isn't really a thing. That said, I think you can safely assume every Hinobi store and partner store has one of these places."

 

[Lord Moldoma]

a baphomet with a chainsaw

“Aw darn. And here I was thinking I’d get to bunk in an apartment with a half demon girl named Strength.“

“It’s probably for the best. If you’re our boss. I don’t wanna know what kind of control baphom you’d be, Yikes.”

"...not really. Ever play Steam Fort 2?" Dave pointed out.

"A little?" Gadg8eer responded.

"XenoSquad?"

"...no? I know you lead a team to stop alien invaders in that one?"

"Captain Corporate and the Marketeers?"

"...no."

"Hogwash Academy?"

"No."

"Social Eyes?"

"No."

"Oneiros 5?"

"From that weird Shin Hionobi Tensei spinoff? No."

"...Hinobilis: A Beginner's Guide to Divinity?"

"That's a tabletop roleplaying game!" Gadg8eer pointed out.

"...Kids in Defiance: Operation Splatling Gum?"

“Played it. Played it. Played it. Played it. Played it. Played it. Played it. That’s telling, wiz.”

"...its a portal. Isn't that obvious?"

“Who do you think he is, Beck Safari? You can’t expect just anyone to identify those on demand.” She pulled up a clip on her screen. Oh. I didn’t know she could do that. And in full color too.

It was a clip from Beck Safari (aka the classic BeeTuber, BeckTron) who was goofing on an old sentai show from the 80s made before the realization of VR tech.

“What, so you can just identify those on demand?” In the video Beck had asked comically. Before speaking over a short collage of images of various gateways and portals “gateway, gateway, portal, gateway and/or portal.”

The Stark laugh of the Jester King from Darling Mythos IV echoed out of Zoe’s electric voice box. Probably an emote that Zoe had been storing away. To save her iconic screechy laugh for vtuber streams and give her damn chirp-pot a rest.

"Welcome to Glitch Techs HQ."

“GL-GLITCH TECHS? FUUUFUUUFUUUFUUUFUUU!!” She laughed. Oh now see there’s that iconic screechy laugh. “God, what a fuckin’ name, choom. What a fuckin’ name. You get that sent to you by a different contest winner?”

 

[Gadg8eer]

"No, that one was from Hinobi corporate. Not the most creative bunch, are they?" Dave chuckled.

"What do Glitch Techs even do?" Gadg8eer asked.

"You should probably try the tutorial we just recently improved. It's mandatory anyway if you're going to join." Dave explained.

"Huh? Why us? I'm not exactly cut out to do any sort of tech support." Gadg8eer pointed out.

"Let's just say tech support is more like a third of what Glitch Techs actually do." Dave pointed out, and tapped something on his strange high-tech gauntlet.

At that moment, the H-shaped Hinobi logos on ZoeIRL's robot body and the backpack cross-straps fastener for Gadg8eer's plixel-tech avatar began to give a pulsating glow.

"Try tapping those icons and saying ReSet." Dave told them.

"You mean like in the iTV series Hinobi made in the 90s, BeeBoot?" Gadg8eer asked, and shrugged. He tapped the icon as instructed, and suddenly his biking gloves transformed into a pair of high-tech gloves similar to the one Dave was wearing. "Whoa. Cool!"

 

[Lord Moldoma]

At that moment, the H-shaped Hinobi logos on ZoeIRL's robot body and Gadg8eer's plixel-tech avatar began to give a pulsating glow.

“Gee. I guess Im lucky I didn’t get that removed like my mechanic/fixer Dee said I should’ve… Girl’s a genius, surprised she hadn’t figured out whatever this all is. Not that she’d probably try to do anything other than blackmail hinobi if she did or leak it on a Blitzkrieg forum for shits and giggles. You guys must have some serious resources dedicated to misinformation. You brought up new weird order, don’t they have a thing called amnestics? Are those… those aren’t real are they?”

"Try tapping those icons and saying ReSet."

“Eufh, I can only hope for a magical girl transformation sequence at this point.” She presses on the icon. Shouting “ReSet!”

 

[Gadg8eer]

“Gee. I guess Im lucky I didn’t get that removed like my mechanic/fixer Dee said I should’ve… Girl’s a genius, surprised she hadn’t figured out whatever this all is. Not that she’d probably try to do anything other than blackmail hinobi if she did or leak it on a Blitzkrieg forum for shits and giggles. You guys must have some serious resources dedicated to misinformation. You brought up new weird order, don’t they have a thing called amnestics? Are those… those aren’t real are they?”

“Eufh, I can only hope for a magical girl transformation sequence at this point.” She presses on the icon. Shouting “ReSet!”

Her robot self seized up the moment she tapped the Hinobi "H" logo placed on the upper left of its torso, and a small command line appeared on the TV-head's CRT screen...

Error: HinobiAntiRepair.exe could not be found. Plixel.exe requires unmodified hardware to function.

"What the FUCK?!" ZoeIRL complained, seeing the message on her end.

"Oh. I can get iQ to fix that. Follow me." Dave said, leading them to a young man who would've probably been a famous basketball player if he wasn't almost as white as a ghost and too thin to play sports. "Zeke, these are the two that Corporate made me hire."

"...hello." Zeke said, somehow even more nervous-looking than Gadg8eer. "I'm, ah, Zeke. You can call me iQ though... if that's okay with you."

"Zeke does the repairs on Beedrone phones, Smarthome devices and household robots. He can probably help you get whatever custom ROM you installed on this robot to work with the Hinobi toolkit." Dave explained.

"I, um..." Zeke iQ Daniels said, and looked closely at the robot, "Is this a BX-1 Streamcast TV Host robot? They haven't made these in 20 years, and that was only in Japan, but sometimes Glitch Tech equipment has better plug-n-play software and backwards compatibility..." he said, and tapped something on his own Glitch Tech gauntlet. He took a short, retractible B-Type charging cable out of his pocket protector and connected the ends to his gauntlet's charging/data port and the input port on the TV, causing the small command line re-appeared on the CRT-headed robot's face-screen. "Eh, here we go. You retrofitted everything with a Blueberry Phi running GraphiteOS, and never activated the developer options. Since it's not the official operating system, the Hinobi software couldn't do it for you."

"It threw up an error, too." Dave mentioned.

"Just the Hinobi AntiCheat being evil, I loaded the DumbiAntiCheat dummy program to shut it up." iQ explained, "Do you need anything else?" he asked ZoeIRL.

 

[Lord Moldoma]

Zoe took a moment to look around. Testing the fingers of the robot. "Yikes, domo. The reason my mechanic picked one from 20 years ago is because it's easier to modify that stuff. Newfangled tech like Nano-Bodies and Hardlight Avatars are either too expensive or too hard to hotwire without a dedicated Hinobi-Corp maintenance chip at your disposal." She explains to iQ seemingly respectful to him since he seems less like the managerial type and more like someone who actually works with tech. Probably out of habit, since that's how you treat your respective maintenance people or street docs (Afterall, you don't want the person that's operating you to have a grudge.) "Dee told me It's better to put your own custom chrome on an old frame while knowing fully how it works than to hose the job by working with the newest tech."

"That and it was what we could get ahold of. Hinobi and the progs been trying to crack down on the secondhand robotics trade for anything that's military grade. For obvious reasons. Serious heatwaving." Zoe says. "But technically this is all legal or homemade. So at the very most I'm in a gray area. Don't get any ideas." She says. "I'm not running some sort of combat bot workshop."

 

[Gadg8eer]

"Jeez, and they say I have a cybersecurity fixation." Gadg8eer grumbled, "I just use Gogglefox as a browser, and PopRock!_OS as firmware."

"Eh... You'd be surprised how much pull Hinobi has on the electronics manufacturing industry. You won't be working with something as simple as consumer hardware, it doesn't matter how old your hardware is or how open source you go software-wise, the equipment you're about to train for can and will be capable of interfacing with it. I know that revelation is a little concerning, but it is what it is." Dave explained.

 

[Lord Moldoma]

"I don't mind, I'm a sucker for backwards compatibility, I just wish they could do that with more of their consoles." Zoe states, holding a bit of reservation from the trouble she had with being unable to always stream the games requested by her viewer-base due to a lack of the appropriate paraphernalia. "Either way, I'm glad my modded setup won't be an issue, and your company won't be coming after me for using modified deprecated tech." She says, scratching the side of her head. "Trust me, you don't want my ugly ass here in person."

She was probably just joking, but Gadg8 would get the idea that, possibly, this cutesy TV-headed robot body was a shield, a mask to hide someone who was incredibly insecure of their appearance. Why else would she dress like she walked out of an anime the way she did? Well, aside from, you know, that was just how cyber-streetwear turned out a lot of the time. She may've been serious. Someone who was too lazy to show up wouldn't even bother sending their remote battle-body

 

[Gadg8eer]

"I don't mind, I'm a sucker for backwards compatibility, I just wish they could do that with more of their consoles." Zoe states, holding a bit of reservation from the trouble she had with being unable to always stream the games requested by her viewer-base due to a lack of the appropriate paraphernalia. "Either way, I'm glad my modded setup won't be an issue, and your company won't be coming after me for using modified deprecated tech." She says, scratching the side of her head. "Trust me, you don't want my ugly ass here in person."

She was probably just joking, but Gadg8 would get the idea that, possibly, this cutesy TV-headed robot body was a shield, a mask to hide someone who was incredibly insecure of their appearance. Why else would she dress like she walked out of an anime the way she did? Well, aside from, you know, that was just how cyber-streetwear turned out a lot of the time. She may've been serious. Someone who was too lazy to show up wouldn't even bother sending their remote battle-body

"Well, the thing about working for the company that can reset your system is... you suddenly become the one they expect to use the flashy thing, and no matter how well they pay you or your co-workers, there's no real guarantee that you won't end up spilling the beans. So they tend to try and keep their employees and affiliates happy," Dave explained as Zeke returned to repairing a nobiPhone H17+ Max Pro Ultra, "which is why you're here. The perks are nice but there is a real danger to this job and you do have to keep in mind Hinobi has hired teenagers for this position because most adults can't game worth crap."

"Wait, hold on. Are you saying kids have died because-" Gadg8eer began to say, concerned.

"Well, not died, fortunately. Mostly it's Corporate is getting sick of paying people's medical bills, and regional admins like me got tired of lying to the employee's family and friends - not to mention the Worker's Compensation Board of BC or, for my colleague who admins the Danville Glitch Techs just across the border in Washington State, your Health Insurance Provider - about how someone cracked their rib repairing a video game console. That's why tech like robot bodies and plixel avatars are becoming public knowledge all of a sudden, the job requires three skills..." Dave explained, "...tech skill, fighting or athletic skill, and gaming skill. You two know what plixels are from as a result of past experience, but have you ever asked yourself... if plixels exist, and they're like the holosuite in Star Probe: The Next Frontier, what really happens when a video game starts to glitch?"

"Oh. Um... You do mean when it glitches in a system that has plixel technology, right?" Gadg8eer asked.

"Maybe you'd better check out the tutorial first?" a voice said nearby.

The words were those of an asian girl with a surprisingly wide frame, a cheerful tomboyish face, and a T-Shirt over her uniform that featured an image of Helpy saying I see you're trying to do your job. Want some help with that? and a patch sewn onto it of the Hinobi "H" logo.

"Oh, hey, ZoeIRL! Big fan!" the young woman beamed with joy to the robot body.

"Ah, this is Tobi. She's one of our only technicians, and the only one who does house calls full time. Juan and 'riette alternate their full-time shifts weekly and, in case you haven't noticed, this town's finally starting to grow now that the old town council was run out of town on a railroad." Dave explained.

"Run out of town?" Zoe questioned. "You called me in from- well, from a long way away, that's damn sure. I don't have even the slightest clue what you think I should have noticed."

"There was a flood here a few years ago..." Gadg8eer pointed out, "...and then another one two years later, and then another 3 years after that, and finally the worst one so far happened just last year. They held an emergency election because the old mayor lives on the mountainside east of town, and basically didn't care because everything he owned was a long way above the water line, which meant half the town flooded and he didn't even flinch. Normally the only ones here that voted against the same 7 people that got elected over and over were homeless or working with people in poverty, but when that flood happened it destroyed most of the downtown area..."

"Yeah, t-l-d-r is that now they're literally replacing everything with new construction that uses Hinobi's new smartgrid tech. Installing all deez new modules is keeping everyone here busy and the town is growing a bit because those ashtrays who were in the city council skipped town when they realized they'd never be forgiven for wiping out the downtown area." Tobi explained. "We need more hands on decks if we're going to keep everything running."

"What do you mean?" Gadg8eer asked.

"Follow me." Dave motioned, and led them down a corridor to a door labelled Training Room. He held his gauntlet in front of the keypad, and it automatically opened. "Helpy? Load up Tutorial 2.0, and let me know when it's complete."

"Right away, Mr. Davenport!" a cheerful voice responded, and a hologram of the infamous Helpy the Helper from HinobiOffice 98 and the Portals XB operating system of the 00s. "Come on in!" A couple small red circles appeared on the floor. "Just stand on the marked circles, and the Tutorial will begin."

"In case you're wondering, you can back out after the tutorial's done at any time, but we'll have to wipe your memories if you do." Dave pointed out, "Have fun!"

"How long is the tutorial?" Gadg8eer asked, but realized the doors had closed behind Zoe and him already, preventing Dave from hearing the question. Shrugging, he walked over to one of the circles and stood over top of it, causing it to turn green. He glanced over at the other circle nine feet away, which remained red...

 

[Lord Moldoma]

Zoe let out a sigh from her machine body as she walked over to the circle, hands in her pockets and tv head tilted down. “As much as I like Asian girls — sue me — that Tobi girl is gonna be a huge inconvenience, I hope she can see me as just a coworker… I can’t talk to fans good when I’m not streaming.” Zoe says. “I can’t talk to anyone good outside of streams without being an asshole. And I don’t want to crush that girl’s dreams by not being the Zoe she knows who makes up words to express anger at shitty games.” She stands on the circle, and waits for it to activate.

“Dee tells me I need to go to therapy for that stuff. But I’ve never met a therapist who could help and I’ve been through 3…”

 

[Gadg8eer]

Zoe let out a sigh from her machine body as she walked over to the circle, hands in her pockets and tv head tilted down. “As much as I like Asian girls — sue me — that Tobi girl is gonna be a huge inconvenience, I hope she can see me as just a coworker… I can’t talk to fans good when I’m not streaming.” Zoe says. “I can’t talk to anyone good outside of streams without being an asshole. And I don’t want to crush that girl’s dreams by not being the Zoe she knows who makes up words to express anger at shitty games.” She stands on the circle, and waits for it to activate.

“Dee tells me I need to go to therapy for that stuff. But I’ve never met a therapist who could help and I’ve been through 3…”

"...I know we didn't hit it off good, but..." Gadg8eer started to say just before Zoe finished putting her second foot onto the floor within the circle.

"Detecting Hive user profiles... Confirmed. Connecting to Buzz network... Connected." a computer voice said. "Tutorial now active."

Suddenly everything went dark. Gadg8eer blinked twice to signal his goggles to go into flashlight mode; along with his parent's home, he was very good at understanding automation interfaces, and set up his goggles to toggle the LED rings around the lenses if he blinked twice in the dark, to activate sunshading if he blinked twice in well-lit conditions, and double-click (or equivalent) where he was looking if using Privacy Mode on his goggles' ApidWindows (another Plixel Tech innovation oddly inspired by ReSet/BeeBoot) regardless of light level.

Before he could look around, the big computer display on the far side of the Deck turned on, displaying one of those old things from films that counts down 3...2...1... with the radar-looking thing.

"Following the end of World War II, the United States of America and Japan entered a secret agreement known as the Maui Project. It was from this that modern technology, and by extension the Hinobi Technology corporation, was born!" said a very old recording of an announcer's voice that probably dated back to the 50s. Several historical photos appeared on-screen, explaining the origins of the company.

"What the world did not know is just how important the American military and Japanese Defense Force are to Hinobi's origins," stated what seemed to be a British documentary clip from the 1960s, "particularly exactly what technology Hinobi Technology produces..."

"Nyet. Plixar was smokescreen and propaganda. Americans paid them to make Plixel Tech public. Hinobi Technology poses biggest threat to motherland." said a 1970s Soviet leader over a TV news broadcast.

"The day Hinobi was privatized, I knew that the world was about to change." spoke a Japanese official in the 1980s.

"I guess that's the thing about weapons. You can only make a sword so single-edged before all you really have is a foam toy." an American general responded in a 1990s supreme court case about Hinobi going public.

"Hinobi fought long and hard to be privatized and then to go public. Plixel technology was invented by Allied scientists at Los Alamos in the early 1940s who were attempting to create the ultimate weapon, machine soldiers who could invade mainland Japan without the loss of American lives or robot troops to take back Europe from the Axis. For the first few decades of Hinobi's existence, these origins held back the advancement of Plixel technology, as government secrecy and political interests prevented Plixel Tech from becoming a civilian technology. Only problem is, Plixel Tech has very little safety features, making Plixel constructs potentially dangerous to use." stated Mark Sidney a few years before he died of brain cancer in 2001. "By partnering with Plixar, we hope to keep things Made in America!"

"Hinobi Technology has made headlines twice in one day, after being seemingly unaffected by the difficulties faced by other tech giants including MicroDyne and Quill Computers as we feel the effects of this real estate bubble, by buying the Federal Reserve Bank and making the cryptocurrency BeeCoin a form of legal tender and pegging the American dollar to the value of 100 BeeCoins." a news reporter stated in late 2008.

"Since 1945, Hinobi Technology has been advancing technology. Since 2000, we've been making what was once a weapon and a profit into something that benefits us all, is safer to use, and most importantly... is fun. Hinobi Technology. The Future is Fun!"

The screen then went dark again. "Well that's not suspicious at all." Gadg8eer pointed out.

Suddenly everything got bright, revealing that Zoe and Gadg8eer had somehow been transported to an empty white room. Standing beside an old TV, wearing a pair of oval kaybug sunglasses like the famous media franchise The System, was Helpy. Yes, Helpy the Annoying from AskHelpy, Portals XB and HinobiOffice 98. "Indeed. I imagine you're feeling a bit like Neon, tumbling out into a world that isn't what you thought it was?"

 

[Lord Moldoma]

Helpy. Yes, Helpy the Annoying from AskHelpy, Portals XB and HinobiOffice 98.

"Ah great we got the fuckin', diet coke PPonzi Buddyi ..." She says.

"Indeed. I imagine you're feeling a bit like Neon, tumbling out into a world that isn't what you thought it was?"

"No, all of this is pretty par for the course. It's like people who make up conspiracy theories to be made at a secretive new world order or something. You don't have to go through that effort, you can just be mad at the normal government." She says. "Honestly you guys are pretty much Iceberg Industries from Chewypaste Crisis. But ironically enough, I think anyone in the world who assumes there's not some sort of horrible conspiracy behind your guys work is pretty much fooling themselves."

"I'll take the black pill." She says.

"That's the biggest black pill of them all." She plays a clip from SleepyTooth.

 

[Gadg8eer]

"Alright, but remember, Zoe. All this tutorial is offering is the truth." said Helpy.

"Uh, Helpy? Can I call you Helpheus?" Gadg8eer asked.

"No."

"Please?"

"Fine."

"Helpius... What kind of dumbass thought this could POSSIBLY convince ANYONE to be a Hinobi employee after this?!"

"What if I told you... There's a very good reason few know the answer to the question you really want to ask..."

Suddenly, a plixel tech construct in the shape of a pair of basketball-sized robotic fists, which uncurled into relaxed hands, then tapped Gadg8eer's shoulder three times in one second to get his attention. The left hand passed a thick brown business envelope with the Hinobi logo on it to him.

"Huh?!" Gadg8eer said, confused, and then remembered that normal reality was no different than the Hiverse (or as the internet had dubbed it in memes, the Nobiverse, in reference to the crossover universe of Nobi Grossout Meleé, Brawl, 4 and Ultimate versions of the lost media video game Nobi Grossout). He shrugged and opened the letter like he typically did in VR.

Inside was a sheet of paper...

"Project Maui Test Results... June 1945... Sis really came through for us. The Pigma Machine, the world's first Plixel Engine, has finally been cracked. The Germans didn't suspect a thing even after they lost the war. July 1945. The artificial soldiers are ready. At the advice of Mr. Moore, we've implemented Asimov Strategic Edition, Mk I programming in Maui troops to minimize casualties. August 1945. Testing complete. I don't believe it. A 100% live capture rate every time. I hope this holds as well in the field as Asimov Civilian Edition, last time we made a fork it went psycho every time we tried to modify the code. September 1945. Field testing of Trinity, and deployment of Little Toy and Hat Man, has been completed. I don't believe it. Less than 2% injuries, no deaths, two cities captured. Japan has surrendered, the sheer number of Surgelings in our "rush" strategy apparently limitless. When their missions are complete, LT and HM units have around 24 hour half-lives during which they can be reactivated, otherwise the Plixels dispersed by the Trinity unit decay rapidly. With fine-tuning, I believe this number can be increased for peacetime applications such as locomotives or ocean liners that could go days or even weeks without needing to resupply or refuel, airships, maybe even... I can't read this part... It looks like random scrawlings. I think I see a 'Glitch Teh' in there but it's being corrupted by some... hex codes, or something... Wait, is this a virus email?! Like the kind that Make Rouxles Rich Again nutjobs and offshore call centers send you?"

"No. Unfortunately, no can be told what really happens when a video game starts to glitch... You have to see it for yourselves..." Helpheus responded. "Choose your character!"

A game appeared on the TV's screen, and a CPU selection chip materialized out of plixels was given to the two of them.

"No way... It can't be." Gadg8eer recognized that roster. "The Nobi Grossout 1991 Convention Prototype! *Nobody* has that source code!"

 

[Lord Moldoma]

a CPU selection chip materialized out of plixels was given to the two of them.

"What uh... What do I do with this?" She asks. Looking at the chip through the screen of her modified machine body. "Do I stick it in the port on my neck?" She asks. "Do I eat it?"

 

[Gadg8eer]

"What uh... What do I do with this?" She asks. Looking at the chip through the screen of her modified machine body. "Do I stick it in the port on my neck?" She asks. "Do I eat it?"

Gadg8eer picked up the other CPU chip. It looked like a gambling chip, but had the Nobi Grossout logo engraved into the material. He looked at the various characters and mentally chose one to place the icon on. "I know you play old fighting games, even if I don't really watch livestreams, but don't feel too bad. I kind of have a knack for understanding game menus." he said, and placed the icon on a small-looking, adorable fluffy creature resembling a cross between a dusty bunny, a house mouse, a racoon, and a squirrel known as Verminotr. The plixel chip remained stuck to the screen where Gadg8eer placed it. "Like that, right?" he pointed out, and a glow effect appeared around Verminotr's selection box.

 

[Lord Moldoma]

"It's lost media. The best I can do in that field is offer rewards for the safe location and retension of it." She says. "I 'play the shitty games that suck ass' not 'search for the games that everyone forgot about'." She taps her screen.

She moves her own chip and places it on Grenokunoichi, who she at least recalled having as a party member in one of the recent Flunky Quest games.

"This better not be conducive to a transformation. I like that stuff on my off time, but I'm not interested in doing it in front of someone who looks like a 10 year old kid."

 

[Gadg8eer]

"It's lost media. The best I can do in that field is offer rewards for the safe location and retension of it." She says. "I 'play the shitty games that suck ass' not 'search for the games that everyone forgot about'." She taps her screen.

She moves her own chip and places it on Grenokunoichi, who she at least recalled having as a party member in one of the recent Flunky Quest games.

"This better not be conducive to a transformation. I like that stuff on my off time, but I'm not interested in doing it in front of someone who looks like a 10 year old kid."

"Ready? Gross OU-OU-OU-OU-OU-OU-T!" the TV blared, as the graphics glitched up.

"Oh, crap... I think we just broke-" Gadg8eer started to say, when suddenly two bursts of Plixel energy fired out of the TV, slamming into the floor after arching a few feet away.

The first formulated into Verminotr, while the second became Grenokunoichi. Each turned and looked at the other, then at the new rookies who had just summoned them. Verminotr tilted it's head, flashed a mischevious smirk, and lunged at Zoe with its incisor teeth bared, while Grenokunoichi leaped at Gadg8eer before turning invisible in mid-air...

"Nothing personnel kid..." a poorly-translated voice mocked.

Gadg8eer shielded himself with his arms for impact by the invisible foe, only to be kicked forward onto the floor roughly. "Oof!"