Advice/Help Being nervous whilst roleplaying

[Erase]

Ight so whenever I rp with someone else and it get's really heated like the two characters are in a verbal fight or smthn like that, I always get really nervous cuz I'm not the kind of person that'd go up to someone and insult them as a conversation starter and I was wondering if there was any way to not get nervous to the point where I ghost the other roleplayer and the rp is voided.

 

[nerdy tangents]

1. Your characters are not real people. So I think a good way to keep calm is to remind you that the roleplay isn’t real. The characters don’t exist so there is nothing to worry about.

2. If you just don’t know what to say in an argument you can ask your partner for tips. Or try reading more, it’s a great way to improve your dialogue and writing.

 

[Jannah]

1. Your characters are not real people. So I think a good way to keep calm is to remind you that the roleplay isn’t real. The characters don’t exist so there is nothing to worry about.

2. If you just don’t know what to say in an argument you can ask your partner for tips. Or try reading more, it’s a great way to improve your dialogue and writing.

Dialogue is easily one of the most difficult things to write, especially for characters with personality so drastically different from your own. At least for characters with similar personality I can think about lines of dialogue I could potentially picture myself saying in whatever the situation happens to be.

 

[nerdy tangents]

True which is why I said ask your partner for tips. As chances are they aren’t going to have the exact same personality as you.

Also things like TV shows or reading books will help. God knows there are any number of reality TV series that are about 80% fighting which would be great for dialogue tips for this scenario.

I can’t think of a book genre that has the same kind of drama /fighting premise though.

 

[Erase]

1. Your characters are not real people. So I think a good way to keep calm is to remind you that the roleplay isn’t real. The characters don’t exist so there is nothing to worry about.

2. If you just don’t know what to say in an argument you can ask your partner for tips. Or try reading more, it’s a great way to improve your dialogue and writing.

I feel like I'd come off as someone who can't hold an argument if I had to ask my partner for tips all the time and it might take the fun out of rping with them. Also I've read plenty of books when I was younger that had characters that opposed each other quite a lot. I don't think I'd have time to aquire dialogue tips through watching a show or reading cuz I'm rlly behind on some important things.

 

[nerdy tangents]

I feel like I'd come off as someone who can't hold an argument if I had to ask my partner for tips all the time and it might take the fun out of rping with them. Also I've read plenty of books when I was younger that had characters that opposed each other quite a lot. I don't think I'd have time to aquire dialogue tips through watching a show or reading cuz I'm rlly behind on some important things.

Really it’s mostly about tone, personal grievances, and the other persons insecurities.

So I feel like your biggest problem is just going to be getting out of your own head. Remember these aren’t real people and your partner isn’t judging you.

Most people LOVE talking about their characters so if you need help with dialogue tips and you phrase it like

“Hey I don’t really know what would make your character upset. Could you maybe tell me a bit more about them?”

As for your own character, what are things that annoy them? Thinking about that will also help you pick out your side in the argument.

 

[chuushi]

I feel like I'd come off as someone who can't hold an argument if I had to ask my partner for tips all the time and it might take the fun out of rping with them. Also I've read plenty of books when I was younger that had characters that opposed each other quite a lot. I don't think I'd have time to acquire dialogue tips through watching a show or reading cuz I'm rlly behind on some important things.

I wish I knew how to help, in the end, something that helped me the most because I used to get so nervous when rping, anxious over my replies, anxious over whenever a fight would happen, it got to the point where I was feeling guilt from MY CHARACTER I was playing in my own godforsaken DREAMS. Guilt that was misplaced on the character I was writing anyway, bc nothing was their fault!

I'd say the best thing you can do is to take a roleplaying break overall and put some distance between you and the character. If that doesn't work for you or you're looking for a more immediate solution, I'd go with what Nerdy Tangents said, and on top of that just keep continually reminding yourself that it isn't real. If it helps, write your points out before you write, like plotting what you're going to write, and then write it in another page or another document, or while listening to some music, or alternate between talking to a friend cheerfully and writing the argument. It could lessen the burden. I hope something is able to help you!! Wishing luck!

 

[Erase]

Really it’s mostly about tone, personal grievances, and the other persons insecurities.

So I feel like your biggest problem is just going to be getting out of your own head. Remember these aren’t real people and your partner isn’t judging you.

Most people LOVE talking about their characters so if you need help with dialogue tips and you phrase it like

“Hey I don’t really know what would make your character upset. Could you maybe tell me a bit more about them?”

As for your own character, what are things that annoy them? Thinking about that will also help you pick out your side in the argument.

oh I see so I need to explore my own character and know their boundaries before rping as them and picking a fight with someone else's character?

 

[nerdy tangents]

oh I see so I need to explore my own character and know their boundaries before rping as them and picking a fight with someone else's character?

Oh most definitely. I mean think of yourself, there are definitely things people do that piss you off. Even if you never actually say anything or bring it up out loud you have to have those moments when you grumble in your own head.

Arguments are just figuring out what makes your character grumble and then have them say it out loud rather than in their own head. (Or if you want to go passive aggressive have them grumble in their head and act like nothing is wrong outwardly).

 

[Erase]

Oh most definitely. I mean think of yourself, there are definitely things people do that piss you off. Even if you never actually say anything or bring it up out loud you have to have those moments when you grumble in your own head.

Arguments are just figuring out what makes your character grumble and then have them say it out loud rather than in their own head. (Or if you want to go passive aggressive have them grumble in their head and act like nothing is wrong outwardly).

ight, thanks. I'll try following your advice on reminding myself that my character isn't real

 

[Crayons]

Also, remember that the partner's character isn't real either. You won't be hurting anyone's feelings or offending anyone. The most you will do is hurt a fictional character's fictional feelings - and those are fair game. Go for it!

 

[Necessity4Fun]

It's pretty much what everyone else has said, none of the characters are real and they're fighting amongst themselves, so none of you should be upset with the outcome. It's okay to feel some level of guilt, as long as it doesn't start affecting your enjoyment of things. First time I did anything like that Kendrick was being a bit too harsh on Isabella and remember apologizing to her player because I felt bad for the poor cat-girl. Sometimes I still apologize for the turn things took, but I don't keep myself from doing them since it's exactly what the characters would do still.

Roleplaying is a bit like acting. It's acting with writing and descriptions, rather than tones, gestures and facial expressions. You might want to know a lot about the character before-hand to know exactly which role you're supposed to be playing, it's why I like CSs. CSs are great guidelines and a quick way of assigning important things to a concept that will keep my characterization grounded until I can finally really get on the spirit of the thing. I recommend filling out a CS layout even if it's just for yourself and nobody else.

But also, please don't feel ashamed for needing help, not everybody knows everything or has been doing this for long and that's okay. It's the same to everybody and any other hobby too, I mean if you decided you wanted to play guitar would have to study it up and practice constantly, right? It's the same to everything, definitely writing. I know that if I went to re-read some of my old stuff I would see how much just doing it has helped round it up nicely.

I'd like to make it a point though that, no matter how anxious and such you are, ghosting is the worst thing that you can do to your writing partner. They won't be able to help if you just go radio silent on them, and they won't have a reason as to why and maybe start to worry that they did something wrong... It's terrible for both parts. I know that it's hard, I often have the same problem, but I can't stress this enough, please just say your reasons to the other person. It doesn't matter how silly you think they are, more often than not they'll understand and heck, they might be feeling the same thing.

I don't like how common and casual of a thing it is becoming/has become, for people that overthink like me this is practically death. It's worse than if you just said you have a problem with me or something like that, honestly. Not that I haven't done it before, we all have times where we can barely function as people and this kind of stuff happens (I felt even worse, but couldn't be helped), but let's avoid ghosting people unless they're extreme cases, okay?

Sorry for the little change of topics, but I thought it was something that had to be said.
Anyway, enjoy your rp and I hope everything works out for you! o/

 

[spartona]

Dialogue is easily one of the most difficult things to write, especially for characters with personality so drastically different from your own. At least for characters with similar personality I can think about lines of dialogue I could potentially picture myself saying in whatever the situation happens to be.

A tip! I really enjoy writing dialogue and consider myself pretty good at it- the way that happened was I’d just...write pages of pure dialogue. No descriptions or anything. It sounds absurd, but if you write a convo between two characters without description you can get the point where you don’t need it. The way they speak sets them apart and in some cases you can even see what they’re doing and hear their tone just from what they say.

It’s also really fun : )

 

[spartona]

Ight so whenever I rp with someone else and it get's really heated like the two characters are in a verbal fight or smthn like that, I always get really nervous cuz I'm not the kind of person that'd go up to someone and insult them as a conversation starter and I was wondering if there was any way to not get nervous to the point where I ghost the other roleplayer and the rp is voided.

Everything everyone out here is very sound advice! The great thing about the role playing community is that almost every good partner you have will understand. The majority of people I roleplay with is so we can develop our characters.

Asking advice from your partner for arguments and/or telling them you’re not quite sure how to write it since you’re still developing your character, they’ll most likely understand! And I’m sure they’ll be patient and love to help/have some tips.

I wish you luck!