A Fantasy Concept that I am yet to name

[AAndroidD]

Whilst I am still fleshing out ideas, I was thinking to get a sense of what others think of what I'm making!


Intro:


Children, come closer and listen for you are about to hear a very important story. The story of when you were all born.


From your mothers whom carried you nine months, you emerged, bawling and crying out to the world. The joy of life embraced you: and your response was to scream in awe. And yet, that is not all there is to tell. From the moment your eyes first opened to see light, or your ears first dared to listen from beyond the amniotic that nurtured you, a second life was born into this world as well. A guardian spirit. Each of you has one, guiding you towards your destiny. Each time a voice whispers at the back of your head, planting the seed of action: that is your spirit guiding you. Every time luck seemed to go your way, where an arrow grazed your body or you slipped and fell landing you inches from the edge of a cliff, that is your spirit protecting you.


Do not search for your spirits, children, merely accept their existence, for seeking to take more of their power is the work of fools. I was once young, and did not listen. I meditated, I learned to speak back. I believed that I was powerful enough to control it. I was not powerful enough to keep it from leaving, nay I had no influence as it abandoned me for my transgressions. Now I have no guidance, I shall never reach my destiny. Shall you reach yours?


A juvenile voice called out from the young, attentive crowd, "Sir,"


The storytelling elder glanced to see a girl, no older than 6, raising one hand and pointing vaguely within the audience with the other, "What about the kids who can see their spirit and talk to them?"


Gritting his teeth, the old man replied, "They lie for attention, to see your spirit is nonsense."


Gravely looking away, he called out without eye contact with the group whatsoever, "Go to your homes, I have business to do."


He had hoped that this year, this generation, no new seers would emerge, but alas, his hopes were in vain. It was his duty now to reveal to the council that new seers had arisen, and had to be removed.


Proper Details:


As the intro may have made apparent, the premise of this Fantasy is that each person has a spirit assigned to them who quietly assists in their life, who is not visible to humans and are, generally, shrouded in mystery.


The roleplay will begin with players taking the roles of either the grown versions of these "seers", those that can see their spirits (and by extension, other spirits) and thus communicate and harness their abilities further than simple luck tricks.


Other details I will keep secret for now.


About the spirits:


The spirits are extremely varied in appearance and outright abilities. The only consistent details are that they independently can only subtly influence the world, but through the aid of a human can unleash far stronger powers. In other words, when you go to character creation, you design first of all, your player, a human, but also their spirit. Realistically, it can take any appearance you want (is this too free? im thinking perhaps i should implement greater restrictions on this aspect of creation, or at least more direction...)


Story:


The story of this RP would revolve around the seers being persecuted from the world of those who cannot harness their spirits naturally. Generally, there will be a genocidal hatred by the general populace of the "seers" who have those capabilities. Struggling against this will be the primary focus of the story. In order to facilitate the cahracters' existence without having knives to their throats or them burned to the stake immediately, There will be a hidden settlement that is made up of seers, both rightfully and wrongfully accused, forced to flee home to avoid death.


I really feel like I've got a ways to go before I get this into a state I'm happy with, but at the very least im satisfied enough to put it up for the world to evaluate and give me tips on!


To do list:


-Create a more clear idea of what a spirit and a seer's capabilities are. Beyond "general magic" that is different for each spirit, I haven't gotten far


-Further world building. I need a better idea of the geography and the government, as well as the precise time period (I intend to do somewhat historic setting, most likely a variant on a medieval style world, but the exact details of things such as levels of technology remain unsure)


-Set limitations around how spirits can be influenced. They are a separate being entirely but their powers must be shared somehow. I also believe it would be beneficial for spirits to be able to be influenced by those other than their patron human that they were born with.

 

[Idea]

Hmmm...This seems like a very interesting idea, and if you play your cards right, a very fleshed-out and overall awesome world and plot.


Now, just a tip here, this concept isn´t exactly new. And before I pass as a troll for saying that, I just want to state the implications of it: This very much relies on execution. The success or failure of the concept is unlikely to really have much credit from the concept itself, but rather the way it is presented. The conflict is the same thing, although in that case, I would recommend changing it. It´s clicheish and with the concept you have the possibility to work with, it´s also pretty bland and unnecessary. I´m talking about the "hunted kind" type of plot. You have a concept that, for all we know, has the potential to deal with matters of the mind or more attached to who people are such, rather than some nonsensical hatred.


As such, my recommendations:


1. There should be no limit to forms/shapes, but the interaction with the actual world should be pretty limited. Have these beings only be able to interact with the world under given conditions or in a set medium, or have them only be able to interact with the world in very small degrees. You should also have them only be able to produce a given kind of effect.


2.You should better flesh-out what these beings are exactly, they´re origin and characteristics as a species. If they are assigned by some malevolent force, they would most likely have traits to corrupt or destroy. If they are based of one´s soul or something, they should take traits that would allow them to be representative of such. If they are based of how one views the world or something, they would most likely change over time, and all start the same. Etc...


3.Remove that plot you currently have and replace it with something that better fits the previous points, in particular, # 2


Now I will provide an example, and note this is just an example and does not need to be anything you have to follow:


Everyone has heard of those poor children who died without having a chance to even be born. They were innocent, deserved more than this awful fate. It was once asked "some people deserved life. Can you give it to them?"


What if someone could? What if someone were to twist the strings of fate, to grant these people´s lives?


Yet, as a string twists, it twists for more than a mere point.


These children lived, and gained the ability to see their spirit. The spriit instills upon them to avoid what would have caused it. And something else: The world has come to recognize X, an organization made from the people who were assigned these spirits, as they are tasked to fix the consequences of their own lives. The consequences of a twisting fate.


The spirits themselves must be summoned through rituals, only being able to appear in fate-twisted areas. It is the task of every member of X to fix the fate in this areas, thus eliminating the, using the powers of their spirits.