Had a really hard time today. Thought about my friend's passing again and I miss him so much. Sometimes it truly feels like he was the only one to understand how hard it was to lose someone. I wondered why he decided to take his own life. I wonder why he didn't tell me. I wonder if I couldn't go with him. I wish we could have made it out of the beast called depression together. I wanted to celebrate life with my best friend. Most times I think I've moved past it but no words can really say it so I guess I'll just say: Fuck I'm lonely. I would do anything to have you again.
Maybe there's a galaxy with a planet that's just a little more tilted, with a sun that shines just a little bit darker, and that's where I'm supposed to be, where it somehow makes sense to feel this broken