Fandom Pandora: A Borderlands Story

[ToryD]

"BAM!!! Did you see that, Bandit?! Look it, there's some over there.. and there.. and there!"


The smoking barrel of a Maliwan sniper rifle was the indication it had just been fired. The result? Bandit guts. Everywhere. The owner of the gun was a hunter named Jax. He was young, relatively speaking. He'd done and seen more than most his age. Then again, people often died before they made it to his age, so it didn't matter. Jax stood up, surveying the grizzly scene with a grin.


Beside him, happily bouncing up and down, was a skag he endearingly named Bandit. Bandit was a pup, and Jax's best friend. Jax had adopted him after his mother was killed in an unfortunate accident involving two motorists and some expensive rocket launchers. Jax had avenged Bandit's mother, however, and let his little pup eat their remains. Similar to what he was doing now.


"Alright, boy, there's your lunch. Go get 'em!"


Bandit sprinted off, beginning to head from spot to spot, chunk to chunk, his slimy tongue licking the dirt clean. What was left of the bandit was soon being dissolved in a skag's digestive tract. Feeling satisfied, Bandit ran back to Jax, sitting beside him. Jax pat his head and took a seat next to him, polishing his gun.


As they sat quietly together, Jax's ear started buzzing, a message coming through.


"This is an open invitation to all would-be vault hunters. My name is Mordecai. Recently, we discovered knowledge that several vaults are here on Pandora. If you're seeking a little adventure and think you got what it takes, head to Sanctuary. We'll pick the best among you to seek out these vaults and all the sweet rewards that wait inside. See you soon."


Jax looked down at Bandit, a fire in his eyes that the skag knew it meant he was excited. "Bandit... we're going to Sanctuary." Jax got up, holstering his gun and starting his sprint towards the nearest catch-a-ride station, Bandit happily skipping behind him.

 

[Gobbo]

From a distance, the sound that resonated off the canyon walls could almost be mistaken for thunder. Of course, thunder doesn't really scream or anything, and echoing cries of 'OH GOD MY LEGS' doesn't usually follow them.


Drifting up through the cacophony of noise was what could only be described as a lunatic's laughter, and amid the smoke and dust a thin man could be seen running round a ramshackle town. The satisfying 'fwoomp' of a grenade launcher proceeded the explosions and screams, and by the time the dust settled everything was quiet. Except, of course, the high pitched whining in the man's ears.


The ringing was almost enough for him to miss the static crackling in his ear, giving him enough time to throw his weapon at one last bandit that was trying to crawl away. Another gun digistructed itself into his hands as the other exploded, the bandit detonating with it into little red chunks.


"Vaults, huh?" he mused quietly, slinging his weapon onto his back.


"Eh, could be fun." He moved over to a nearby catch-a-ride and hopped into a technical, putting pedal to the floor towards Sanctuary.

 

[ToryD]

After a couple hours driving through The Dust, Jax had finally reached a fast-travel outpost. These outposts allowed anyone to quickly teleport to other areas and avoid having to make unneccesarily long treks, which Jax wasn't completely opposed to, but Sanctuary was a flying city and as much as Jax would like to strap a bunch of explosives to a light runner and see if it'll make it, the idea would get him killed and still be a ways off.


Jax hopped out and activated the terminal and within a flash, he and Bandit appeared at the gates of Sanctuary. The cool breeze from the elevation sent chills down Jax's body, his senses acclimated to the heat. He pulled his hood up for some protection from the elements and started in the direction of the town's center. The closer he got, the louder things seemed to be. Before he knew it, he was lost in a sea of bodies.


"I guess this open call garnered some attention," he mused as Bandit pulled closer to his leg.

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson tore across the desert, running over anything stupid enough to get in his way. It didn't take long for him to find a fast travel station, though before he got out he noticed it was out of order. He cursed quietly and drove off, slowing down a little when he saw a hand written sign that said "To Sanctuary", complete with backwards letters.


Following the arrows lead him to a boarded up building, the only entrance being a dark hole in the side of the building. He thought about it for a moment, deciding 'fuck it'. He turned his technical inside and gunned it, his stomach dropping as the ground suddenly vanished from under the wheels. He fell a good five seconds before landing on a steep down grade, the only sign of light in the tunnel being a bright neon sign saying "BOOST".


He hit the gas and activated the booster just as the ground moved sharply upward. The speed he gathered was immense, and by the time he exited the tunnel he found himself airborne.


"HOLY SHIII-"


The sound of a roaring engine could be heard getting nearer to Sanctuary, followed closely by the sound of someone screaming. With a loud bang the technical landed on the floating city, pulverizing a few vault hunters as it slid into an out of control skid, slamming hard into the city's walls.


"It. Holy shit. I WANNA DO IT AGAIN!"

 

[ToryD]

The crowd turned towards the sky when what sounded like an engine was closing in above them, Jax included. As the technical came crashing down, smashing several hunter hopefuls and unceremoniously slamming into a wall, Jax started laughing to himself.


"Looks like you can get up here by driving."


Jax motioned for Bandit to follow as he headed further into the crowd, eventually emerging through the front, giving him a view of what was going on. Nothing. People were just standing.. because. Jax turned to someone beside him, looking confused. "Uhh.. is there, like, supposed to be something happening? Or are we-." The man cut him off and screamed, "MY EYES ARE READY FOR THE MEAT PARADE!" Jax raised an eyebrow, looking down at Bandit. "Right."

 

[Gobbo]

As Tyson climbed out of the smoking wreckage of the technical, it took all he could muster to keep from dancing around like an idiot. Once he finally calmed himself down, he moved into the crowd, picking his way through until he couldn't get any closer.


As the crowd talked and wondered what was going on, the telltale sound of Jack's voice sounded over the intercom.


"Hello there, losers. I mean, Vault Hunters. Whatever. So nice of you to all gather in one place for me, it'll save me the trouble of having to track each of your worthless asses down. As I speak, there's... There's a...." the voice said, trailing off to a snickering laugh. The voice suddenly changed to an ear-grating electronic one, a pitch higher than what's comfortable to listen to and WAY too enthusiastic in tone.


"HA! I'm just joshin' ya!"


A little yellow speck of a robot pulled itself onto the fountain in the middle of town with a loud grunt, dusting himself off as he looked out at the crowd.


"I am CL4P-TP! You can call me Claptrap! Marcus may have called you all here, but from here on out, you answer to me! You will all be my minions!" he exclaimed, laughing a very uncomfortably sinister laugh.


"Seriously though, there's a lot of new vaults we just learned about. It's my job to assemble a crack team of Vault Hunters to find these new vaults! Not a job I take lightly, mind you. Not like that time I was asked to watch my buddy's goldfish when he went off on vacation, but I forgot, and it died. But I digress!"


Tyson rubbed his temples, groaning to himself.


"I will lay out a series of tasks for each of you! The first five to complete them will not only win the right to look for said vaults, but will also win the pleasure of my companionship! That's right, I'm trying my hand at being a Vault Hunter!"


Tyson could hear several people in the audience groan their disapproval of that.


"So, you'll find the tasks uploaded to your ECHO devices! Not listed are the special tasks that, if completed, will earn you a chance to listen to my new dubstep EP coming out before everyone else! Task one, you must carry me on your shoulders while you complete task two! Task two... Uh... You have to..." Claptrap paused. "I completely forgot what task two was! Anyways, pair up and go do your tasks! All the ladies can pair up with me. No uggos need apply."


With that he jumped down, humming an irritatingly out of tune song to himself.

 

[ToryD]

Jax was taken back a bit by how things had turned out and judging from Bandit's cocked head, he was too. Scratching the back of his head, Jax let out a sigh. "Well, if we gotta pair up, I guess we should head somewhere where we can hear something other than that annoying little robot. C'mon, boy." He headed off, Bandit close behind.


Just up the way, a bar's bright neon sign caught Jax's eye. He gave in to temptation and set out for a drink. Upon entering, he was greeted by loud music and equally loud patrons, though even that was less invasive than Claptrap. Behind the counter was a busty vixen who Jax recognized right away as Mad Moxxi, Pandora's premier bandit babe. Her reputation as a promiscuous woman was known far and wide, so Jax did what any self-respecting man would do...


"What can I get ya, sugar?" Moxxi asked as Jax sat at the bar.


"Somethin' wet for me. And a bone for my friend here," Jax replied, a sly grin on his face.


Moxxi chuckled, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were coming onto me, hun."


Jax set a few bills on the bar. "Skag pups don't eat bones," he flashed her a wink.

 

[Gobbo]

Claptrap grooved through the crowd, his song turning into his dubstep track that he loved to beatbox. He stopped for a moment in front of a well-endowed female hunter, holding his arms out to his sides. "Hug?" he asked, only to get a kick in response. He sobbed quietly and wheeled away, vanishing into the crowd.


Tyson sighed deeply and headed towards Moxxi's, at least he knew he'd be free from Claptrap's idiocy there.


Once inside he sighed deeply, heading straight to the bar. He overheard the kid's words and just chuckled to himself.


"Smooth. You know, you won't be the first guy to throw her a half-assed comment and turn up empty handed, right?" he said with a smirk, tossing some money on the bar. He nearly tripped on the skag pup as he sat down, staring at it for a few moments.


"That... is a very interesting choice for a pet. Name's Tyson, I blow shit up." he said, offering his hand for a shake.

 

[ToryD]

Moxxi seemed to all but ignore Jax's advances and proceeded to get him a beer. Not completely interested anyway, Jax let it go and went about drinking his beer until another patron interrupted him.


"Can't win 'em all," he replied. When the man offered his hand, Jax shook it, giving him a nod. "Name's Jax. My interesting pet is Bandit. We, too, blow shit up. Like skulls. They just go pop.. like watermelons." Bandit started to get excited, jumping beside Jax's chair.

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson looked at the man for a moment, smirking slightly as he noticed his weapon of choice. "So I see. Maliwan?" he asked as he looked over the rifle. "I'm a Torgue guy myself. No other manufacturer can create quite the right 'boom' for me." he explained, tugging out his monster of a grenade launcher with a grin. When the skag pup started bouncing excitedly he looked a bit concerned.


"He's not gonna... bite me or anything, is he? Spit on me? Hump my leg?" he asked with a little smirk. The pup looked tame enough, though Tyson's knee-jerk reaction was to blow up anything with a face that opened up horizontally.


"Anyways... That irritating bucket of bolts said we all needed to pair up. Got a partner yet?"

 

[ToryD]

"I like the elemental effects. Pretty colors, and all." Jax looked over at his grenade launcher and chuckled. "So you're not a man of accuracy? I suppose that's fair. Don't need to be accurate if you've blown up the battlefield." He had to let out another chuckle when Bandit's excitement unnerved Tyson. "Nah, he's a good pup. Most he'll do is lick ya." Right on que, Bandit's long, disgustingly moist tongue planted a firm swipe across Tyson's arm. Bandit looked thrilled, awaiting acknowledgement.


"He likes you. If you're good enough for him, you're good enough for me. Anyways, I do have a partner. I'm lookin' at him." Jax turned to face Tyson, smiling all the while.

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson jumped a bit at the feeling of the skag's tongue on his arm, wiping the slobber off with a small frown. "Oh, I'm plenty accurate. If by 'accuracy' you mean 'blow up anything that moves.'" he said with a smirk. He looked back down at the pup and couldn't help himself, reaching down to scratch its head lightly.


"This has gotta be a first. Normally I just blow them up, never thought I'd be petting one." he chuckled lightly, looking back at Jax.


"So... I'm just gonna ignore any other tasks Claptrap wants us to do." he said as he checked his ECHO. "Alright, so... We have to get Gutripper's head, collect ten bandit hands... This is all just basic, generic shit. I'm not really sure how this is supposed to gauge our ability to go looking for these Vaults."

 

[ToryD]

"I'm pretty sure that robot doesn't have any say over anything. He's probably just there to clear out anyone stupid enough to embark on his tasks," Jax said, patting Bandit's head as the skag bounced happily. "Betcha that Mordecai guy knows what's up. He's the one who sent out that mass recording."


Jax skimmed through his ECHO device now, ignoring the continuously updating mission issued by Claptrap. "No, I will not be "seeking the lost treasure of Cowlick Cove." Is there even a place called Cowlick Cove?!"

 

[Gobbo]

"Good idea." he said, thinking. "Let's track him down and see what's really going on." Tyson chuckled a bit, shaking his head.


"That robot wouldn't know his ass from a hole in the ground. Cowlick Cove isn't a real place." he sighed quietly. "How much you wanna bet that if we actually talk to Mordecai, we can avoid this whole 'collect weird shit' thing, huh?"


He stood and finished downing his drink, letting out a long sigh. "Just so you know... Being partners with me means you'll probably end up with vastly diminished hearing at best. At worst, you'll be in a lot of tiny pieces. Unless you piss me off, none of it will be intentional. You cool with that?"

 

[ToryD]

Jax chugged the last of his beer and stood up, Bandit doing a little circle in anticipation beside him. "On the off chance you do blow me to bits, Bandit here will get a good lunch. Let's get goin'." Jax left a tip for Moxxi and headed out, making a straight shot for the town center again. There was still a large crowd of people around making it difficult to see past a few feet in front. Jax turned to Tyson, "Any idea where to start?"

 

[Gobbo]

"I can't be held personally responsible for what my ammo blows up." Tyson replied with a smirk, following him out. He thought for a few moments, scratching under his headband.


"Well... I know Mordecai likes to keep away from the big cities. I think our best bet is to grab a car and head towards the boonies. Maybe listen for sniper fire." he said with a shrug. "We could also just try talking to him on our ECHOs. Either way, we'll figure out a way to get in contact with him."

 

[ToryD]

"That.. is a good idea. We have these stupid ECHO devices, why not use them? Talk about being a convenient plot point!" Jax joked. He pulled up the ECHO and started into it. "Hey, Mordecai guy. We don't wanna listen to that dumb robot and since you called everyone here, clearly you gotta know what we really need to do to be chosen. So.. yeah.. what do?"

 

[Gobbo]

As they waited for Mordecai's reply, Claptrap wheeled over to them, looking about as dejected as a robot with no face could.


"Hey! You're being bad minions! Why don't you want to do my super-awesome-radical missions?" he asked, poking at Tyson's stomach with his hand.


"Well, uh... No offense to you or anything, but we kinda wanted to talk to Mordecai about them. You know, doing investigative work? We'll need to do that if we hope to find any of the vaults. We're just putting our skills to the test." Tyson bullshitted.


Claptrap stared at him for a few moments. "Wow, that's... That's a great idea!" he chimed. "Keep it up, friends! Work like that and you're sure to win this competition!" he nearly yelled in his grating voice. He happily wheeled off, the two of them all but forgotten.

 

[ToryD]

Jax just watched quietly at the interaction, nearly forgetting he'd messaged Mordecai until his voice popped up on the ECHO. "Hey, vault hunter in training. You did good bypassing Claptrap. Go talk to the town mechanic, Scooter. He'll fill you in on the first real task." Jax looked over at Tyson, "Well, there it is. Let's go meet Scooter. Lead the way!"

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson smirked a bit. "See? Claptrap's usually full of shit." he said with a small laugh, heading towards the garage. He walked in through the wide open door and knocked on the wall, looking around.


"Scooter? You in here?" he asked, not seeing much but car parts and shelves. He knew the redneck was in here somewhere, and he started looking through the garage to see if he could find him.

 

[ToryD]

"Awwww, crap, I wasn't ready for visitors." A voice echoed out from behind a large tool rack. Walking around it, Scooter greeted the two wearing nothing. Well, nothing except for a magazine he was using to cover up his manly bits. "I was just, uh, workin' on my new car model."


Jax raised an eyebrow, "Umm.. Scooter.. " The mechanic glanced over at Jax. "Yeah?" Jax shuddered, "Your, uh.. umm.. your magazine.. it, uhh.. it's.. chesty.. umm, parts.. are.. visible." Scooter looked alarmed, "Oh, don't mind that. I didn't even see which one the newspaper guy brung me, heh. I told him I needed that other one, y'know, with the, uhh, cars."

 

[pridedzoey]

Amy sat in moxxies bar for most of the time she was here....poking and proding patrons to drunk to care...or put up a decent enough fight, overall actually quite bored and annoyed at the little steward bot...or claptrap as was a common theme around here as it filled up "quests" and "reminders" on her echo HUD. "Note to self... Find robot.... Place dialog chip Inside integration port.... Have a nice day" she said... As she got up from a table and left the bar. Sanctuary was crowded... Blatantly shoved her way through to the center of town, where a few people just came out of the fast travel port. She stood still....and mumbled to herself " uhhh..what was it we had to do.....do do do....PARTNER! " she suddenly shouted.

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson sighed deeply, shaking his head. "Really Scooter? For fuck's sake, go get dressed. We're here about Mordecai's tasks, and I'd really rather talk about it without the risk of you exposing yourself." he said with a growl. The worst part was that this wasn't the first time that he'd walked in on Scooter checking his oil.


"Really Jax? Scooter's standing here with nothing but some paper covering his junk, and you're worried about a nudie mag?"


(I should make up a second character so she has a partner.)

 

[ToryD]

(Go for it!)


Scooter's eyes widened, "Oooohhhh, so that's why you's here. Well, let me get some clothes on." Scooter rushed off behind the tool rack again. As he did, Jax turned to Tyson, shaking his head. "I dunno.. it was just.. there!" Bandit laid down, covering his head with a paw. "He was totally.. you know.. " Bandit whimpered. "I know, boy.. I know."


Scooter emerged from the rack again, this time fully dressed. "Alright, so you two need some work. Y'know my sister Ellie out in The Dust has had some problems with a clan of bandits called the Hodunks. Maybe you guys could get out there and kill a few of 'em for her. You can't miss her. She's the bigger gal. I mean BIIIIIIIG!"

 

[Gobbo]

Tyson just laughed and shook his head. "You got a lot to learn about the world, kid." he said with a little smirk. By the time Scooter came back out he nodded, thinking for a few moments.


"Yeah, I know about her. Last time I was down in the Dust she wouldn't stop calling me on the ECHO." he said, shuddering slightly. Ellie seemed to have a thing for him, and the thought of her snapping him in half didn't really appeal to him.


---


Cole let out a long sigh, scratching his head. He had just arrived on this planet, and he was already annoyed. There were too many people here, that robot was annoying as all hell, and now some girl was screaming in his ear about a partner.


"Ow, shit..." he mumbled, rubbing his ear as he looked over at her.


"I'm gonna assume by the sudden shouting that you haven't found one yet." he said, turning to face her.