King of the Hill

I summon Zeus, who has been watching this fight over the hill in amusement. Zeus eats the Flying Spaghetti Monster for lunch and turns Cthulhu into a mere fish, forever stripping him of his godly powers. Then, with several huge bolts of lightning, Zeus kills off everybody competing for the hill and sentences them to an eternity in the Underworld. Then, satisfied, he places me on top of the hill, satisfied with its ruler once and for all, and goes back to Olympus.


I am king of the hill.
 
As I was rotting in the Underworld, I summoned Waluigi. He tirelessly fought for the hill, using his majestic glory to bribe Zeus into giving him the hill.


Zeus didn't want to comply at first, but Waluigi threatened him with a really ugly dress. Since Zeus wanted no part in this, he accepted the bribe and gave me and Waluigi the hill. But then, I pushed him off the hill.


I am the Queen of the Hill
 
"I need backup right now! This is a hill robbery gone bad!" I yell into my woilkie toilkie. "Do you copy?"


"I copy, Officer Riuma. We're on the way." Officer @Anomaly says. "This is crazy. The RpNpD already has enough to deal with. Did you hear about the toilet robbery?"


"What?" I ask, confused.


"All the toilet seats at the police station were stolen! The thief is still at large. The police are having a time figuring it out, and they have nothing to go on." Officer Anomaly says.


"That sounds horrible." I say. "Be as fast as you can! This is turning really bad!"


Police all over Roleplay Nation are getting into their cars and flocking to the scene. What started out as a simple hill robbery has turned into a war that has even destroyed roleplays and pocket dimensions. It is time for the authorities to act.


Sirens wailing, angry people yelling and honking their horns could be heard on every street in the nation. Some people had to get off the road to make room for the cops speeding to the scene of the hill. Media reporting the news was on every TV channel in Roleplay Nation. This disastrous war over a lump of grass has taken over the nation.


The first wave of police officers arrive at the scene of the hill. They get out and point their guns and badges. "Stand down! RpNpD, we're here to take what is rightfully ours!"


Everyone puts up a big fight, until all the police arrive, and they are easily able to clear everyone out, arrest most people, and guard the hill as I walk on top of it.


"I am king of the hill!" I yell.
 
After escaping the Underworld with the help of Boris, the slav god, everything around the hill started changing, turning into The Zone (Chernobyl) as I emerge from the ground using a Stalker outfit. "They can't escape now." I say to myself as I walk towards the hill with my sniper rifle, picking the officers one by one until most of them were wounded, leaving them alive so they had a chance to flee. "This hill is mine!" I say as I peacefully follow the dirty road to the top, doing a spartan kick on the current king when I reached the top. "Ahh nuuu cheeki breeki iv damke."


I am the king of the hill.
 
I rub my adorable, fluffy back on the stone walls of my Underworld cell. I do this for about a week, then remember I need a hill to rest on else my existence is meaningless.


I activate my escape plan, and promptly explode into pinata confetti and blood. One of many clones connected to the collective consciousness is directed toward the mission goal. It becomes I. I inform the current king that I have no idea what is being referenced in their last conquest. I tie their shoe strings together as they explain, and push them to roll off the hill.


I am the king of the hill.
 
I enlist the aid of Homura Akemi and one thing leads to another. I set on the hill after the attack by walpurgisnacht and declare my wish to be "that I am king of the hill."
 
I erase anime from existance, rendering Homura Akemi's powers, and the wish, useless. But since I didn't erase video games, I can still have the help of Waluigi in my valiant quest for the hill.


Waluigi throws Nightlark out of the hill, and builds a private castle filled with trashy memes.


But then, I betray Waluigi, and throw him out of the castle too...


Karma is mean, but at least I'm the Queen of the Hill!
 
I sensually whisper into @Kayuta's ear "Wah"


my purple jumpsuit helps me blend in as I do so


I then use my final smash to launch her off the hill.


I am king of the hill
 
I bring Falchion skyward. Its ...tip... shimmers for but an instant.


"Minna, miteite kure!" I say with my best weeaboo accent and broken Cha-pa-nes.


I shield break Nightlark with one stabby stabby of my ultimate poke. While dazed, I taunt thrice more before punishing. I mess up my punish and end up getting 2 stocked. I unplug my controller while the winner is celebrating and go pout on the hill.


I am the (salty) king of the hill.
 
I grab the Yato and bring all my friends from Hoshido along. They raid the Hill, shouting, 'NOHRIAN SCUM' in unison.


They grab cokemonster and throw him all the way to King Garon, sitting on his throne in Nohr.


After a long and hard battle (and a giant chapter), the Hoshidans seized the hill...


Too bad I was on the Conquest path, and all the Hoshidans were captured.


I, and to an extent, King Garon, the ugly slime monster / evil king, are the kings and queens of the hill.


...Waaait... That means I'm married to him!


Y'know, I won't be mad if you throw Garon out. That would be nice.


Send help pls.
 
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Of course, the band had gone to the wrong mound. That mound was where trash character sheets and fanfictions go, so of course as unopposed in the conquering of such a mound. It wasn't even a proper hill


But one man decided to take the hill that truly mattered; the hill that was the right hill, he was sure of it. Climbing to its top, the only man who could seem to brave the hill and not be a God (to some he was) could only be one person:


Hank Hill.


"I am King of the Hill!" he bellowed loudly.
 
I heard the boom, as I was thrown out of the hill by JokerValentine.


Buuuut it wasn't from me, so I was disappointed.


Luckily, I landed right next to Waluigi.


"WAHHHH!" he screamed, running for cover He cleared anything in his way, throwing them and Radder from the hill...


He was going in the wrong direction, so I shot him with a tranquilizer dart.


I kidnapped Waluigi and trapped him on the hill.


He was my servant, and I was the Queen of the Hill.
 
I had been trying to find the hill for days. Finally, I found it. I was in an attack helicopter so all I did was destroy everything on sight.


Everyone should've been dead and I was King of the Hill. 
 
Hey, so, uh... I was also created in the universe. So I created everyone else. All of them were clad in Waluigi garb, so I used all of them as my slaves to dethrone LennyTheMemeGod.


I'm the Queen of the Hill... with a lot of slaves.
 
My eldritch horror maid Ozoi cleans your clock, so to speak, and eats all the Waluigi slaves to make new mansion keepsakes. I am king of the hill.
 
I ran out of the hill after the attack, when I heard they were selling the iphone 7 at the hill. I ran up, clearing everyone out of my way, only to realize that they didn't have any headphone jacks.


One rampage later, I was the queen of the hill.
 
Hank Hill. I need not say anything else. You lose, plain and simple.
 
I float over and push her off the hill. I am king of the hill
 
I create another hill. I am king of the hill.

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