D. Rex
Magic Eight Ball
...Her problems were supposed to be her own to deal with as a warrior. If she couldn't solve her own problems then she deserved to bear the burden of the weight they placed on her shoulders...
Sentimemts Fae too held onto firmly. Fae and Val were similar in many regards. Both were elite Saiyans of prestigious families. Both had been trained at a grueling pace by them. Both had learned that to be weak is to be inferior and a disgrace. Both kept their problems to themselves. And both Saiyans held personal pride in high regard. However, unlike Val, Fae had not been blessed with the great power that had allowed Val to feel that pride. And if Fae did, there was a good chance that Fae and Val could have passed as sisters of heart and spirit. If anyone was to understand what Valkyrie was feeling, it would be Faeora. Furthermore, if anyone understood self loathing and failure, it would also be Fae.
Fae had raised herself from her bed, sitting up. She turned to face Val, sliding her own legs off the side of the bed and rested her elbows on her knees as she listened. And for the most part, listening was about all she could do after being blindsided by her apology. Val never apologized.
Yet Fae could here it in Val's voice. The emotion behind it. The frustration. The trying to stay composed. The guilt. And could see the visible discomfort in her, as she began to reveal uncharacteristic vulnerability. It wasn't at that, that Fae clenched her fists. It was upon hearing the details of the commanders death recounted to her. Now, it was no secret that him and Fae didn't get along for the majority of the time they had known each other. But it still hurt to know he died. Especially as respect had only begun to develop before their parting. It really was a tragic loss.
Val apologized again, and again, before the visage of being composed broke down. Val began to do something that Fae had truly not expected. She began to cry amd let loose words of telling emotion. What she was really feeling. Where she was coming from.
"Do you want to be punished?" Fae asked, after several long moments of silence as Fae stared at the floor. "Would it make you feel better if I punished you for their deaths? If I were to blame you as the sole factor for the cause of all of that. If I were to hate you and ridicule you and condemn you for your failure to do something that was beyond your control." She began, her voice soft and grim. Still looking at the floor, she continued. "Because if I was in your position, that is what I would want. I would hate myself. I would someone to validate my feelings of hatred for myself. I would want them to turn my regret into guilt."
"I would want that, not because it is true. But just so I can blame something other than fate. Or Korvaiis... because it would be the only way that I alone could make sense of the that stabbing and unrelenting pain I would feel in my chest. I would want to lash out at the one to blame, which I would deem myself because it is so much easier than moving forward."
Faeora had trouble admitting this. But it was so easy to empathize with Val, because Fae knew how it would feel. "But I am outside looking in. Or am I? Because Era could just as easily be blamed as the cause. But you would not be able to put the blame on her because you know it wasn't her fault. I could also have been to blame, if only I was there, maybe I could have made a difference. And I honestly feel that. But you would tell me it wasn't my fault either. Then selfishly hog the blame to yourself as if you had any more control than us..." She said, her words harsher than she intended as she let herself give into emotions she shouldn't be feeling.
Faeora looked up at Valkyrie, and looked upon her with sad eyes, as it hurt even saying that, "But it wasn't your fault. It was was the Darkhoods. It was not failure, it was circumstance. It was beyond your control. Even if things had been done differently, either Korvaiis would have played you in a different manner, or you everyone including you would have died and his sacrifice would have meant nothing." She said, pausing to take a deep breath. Fae wasn't meaning to sound so harsh...but just telling Val the things what she wanted to hear would not have helped anything.
Faeora reached out, and cradled Valkyrie's face in both hand. Tilting her head so she would look Fae in the eyes. "You aren't a failure. You are the fruit of Korvaiis success. He was able to keep you alive against all odds when there would have been otherwise no hope, and in turn you were then able exact vengeance and go beyond your limits because of his victory. You are not a failure. You are anything but."
"You are not are failure." She repeated, using her thumbs there humble wipe the tears from Val's reddened cheeks. "I would give anything to have even a minutia of the successes that you have achieved. I'm not special. But you are. I am nothing. But you are something. I would not have been able to come this far if you didn't share blood. Making me a parasite feeding off YOUR successes. You. You are a beacon of hope for the future of our race..." her voice trailed off, a little shakey. Trying to reel herself in from spilling her own feelings into Val. This was surprisingly easy as with Val being emotionally in a weakened state, it was easier for Fae to be strong for her.
Faeora gave her a small and gentle smile and leaned in, kissing Valkyrie on the forehead and wrapped her arms around the read headed saiyan. Embracing her. "Compared to you, I may not be much. But I am not going to let you fall down. The future right now may seem hard. But we have a future. We may not be in control of everything it has to offer... but I know you. That isn't going to stop you from trying. And it isn't going to stop me from trying either. Era wouldn't let it stop her. And Pyro, goodness knows he would not let it stop him out of spite. And if things do happen outside of our control, we will grow stronger and spit in the face of every hurdle that tries to stop us."
"Valkyrie... you aren't alone here. And you are not feeling the pain alone either. It hit all of us really hard. Korvaiis, and every man we have lost, we will miss them. But because we are alive we keep on living for them, and honor them the best we can. Korvaiis had faith in the future, at the very least, because of that, we should too."
ChoShadow ChazGhost
Sentimemts Fae too held onto firmly. Fae and Val were similar in many regards. Both were elite Saiyans of prestigious families. Both had been trained at a grueling pace by them. Both had learned that to be weak is to be inferior and a disgrace. Both kept their problems to themselves. And both Saiyans held personal pride in high regard. However, unlike Val, Fae had not been blessed with the great power that had allowed Val to feel that pride. And if Fae did, there was a good chance that Fae and Val could have passed as sisters of heart and spirit. If anyone was to understand what Valkyrie was feeling, it would be Faeora. Furthermore, if anyone understood self loathing and failure, it would also be Fae.
Fae had raised herself from her bed, sitting up. She turned to face Val, sliding her own legs off the side of the bed and rested her elbows on her knees as she listened. And for the most part, listening was about all she could do after being blindsided by her apology. Val never apologized.
Yet Fae could here it in Val's voice. The emotion behind it. The frustration. The trying to stay composed. The guilt. And could see the visible discomfort in her, as she began to reveal uncharacteristic vulnerability. It wasn't at that, that Fae clenched her fists. It was upon hearing the details of the commanders death recounted to her. Now, it was no secret that him and Fae didn't get along for the majority of the time they had known each other. But it still hurt to know he died. Especially as respect had only begun to develop before their parting. It really was a tragic loss.
Val apologized again, and again, before the visage of being composed broke down. Val began to do something that Fae had truly not expected. She began to cry amd let loose words of telling emotion. What she was really feeling. Where she was coming from.
"Do you want to be punished?" Fae asked, after several long moments of silence as Fae stared at the floor. "Would it make you feel better if I punished you for their deaths? If I were to blame you as the sole factor for the cause of all of that. If I were to hate you and ridicule you and condemn you for your failure to do something that was beyond your control." She began, her voice soft and grim. Still looking at the floor, she continued. "Because if I was in your position, that is what I would want. I would hate myself. I would someone to validate my feelings of hatred for myself. I would want them to turn my regret into guilt."
"I would want that, not because it is true. But just so I can blame something other than fate. Or Korvaiis... because it would be the only way that I alone could make sense of the that stabbing and unrelenting pain I would feel in my chest. I would want to lash out at the one to blame, which I would deem myself because it is so much easier than moving forward."
Faeora had trouble admitting this. But it was so easy to empathize with Val, because Fae knew how it would feel. "But I am outside looking in. Or am I? Because Era could just as easily be blamed as the cause. But you would not be able to put the blame on her because you know it wasn't her fault. I could also have been to blame, if only I was there, maybe I could have made a difference. And I honestly feel that. But you would tell me it wasn't my fault either. Then selfishly hog the blame to yourself as if you had any more control than us..." She said, her words harsher than she intended as she let herself give into emotions she shouldn't be feeling.
Faeora looked up at Valkyrie, and looked upon her with sad eyes, as it hurt even saying that, "But it wasn't your fault. It was was the Darkhoods. It was not failure, it was circumstance. It was beyond your control. Even if things had been done differently, either Korvaiis would have played you in a different manner, or you everyone including you would have died and his sacrifice would have meant nothing." She said, pausing to take a deep breath. Fae wasn't meaning to sound so harsh...but just telling Val the things what she wanted to hear would not have helped anything.
Faeora reached out, and cradled Valkyrie's face in both hand. Tilting her head so she would look Fae in the eyes. "You aren't a failure. You are the fruit of Korvaiis success. He was able to keep you alive against all odds when there would have been otherwise no hope, and in turn you were then able exact vengeance and go beyond your limits because of his victory. You are not a failure. You are anything but."
"You are not are failure." She repeated, using her thumbs there humble wipe the tears from Val's reddened cheeks. "I would give anything to have even a minutia of the successes that you have achieved. I'm not special. But you are. I am nothing. But you are something. I would not have been able to come this far if you didn't share blood. Making me a parasite feeding off YOUR successes. You. You are a beacon of hope for the future of our race..." her voice trailed off, a little shakey. Trying to reel herself in from spilling her own feelings into Val. This was surprisingly easy as with Val being emotionally in a weakened state, it was easier for Fae to be strong for her.
Faeora gave her a small and gentle smile and leaned in, kissing Valkyrie on the forehead and wrapped her arms around the read headed saiyan. Embracing her. "Compared to you, I may not be much. But I am not going to let you fall down. The future right now may seem hard. But we have a future. We may not be in control of everything it has to offer... but I know you. That isn't going to stop you from trying. And it isn't going to stop me from trying either. Era wouldn't let it stop her. And Pyro, goodness knows he would not let it stop him out of spite. And if things do happen outside of our control, we will grow stronger and spit in the face of every hurdle that tries to stop us."
"Valkyrie... you aren't alone here. And you are not feeling the pain alone either. It hit all of us really hard. Korvaiis, and every man we have lost, we will miss them. But because we are alive we keep on living for them, and honor them the best we can. Korvaiis had faith in the future, at the very least, because of that, we should too."
ChoShadow ChazGhost
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