Honest Opinion?

TerrorKitty

TerrorKitty

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Supporter



Name- Caroline Withers


Nickname(s)- Karen


Gender- Female


Age- 17


Nationality- British/Irish


Role- Female Flirt


Likes- Coffee, Beaches, Winning, Helping others,


Dislikes- Sports, Being too cold, Being alone, The dark,


Talents- Sign language, Snowboarding/Surfing, Singing, Cooking


Personality-


Caroline is a sweet girl, yet attention oriented. She is most likely to be seen clutching onto someones arms in affection, although she flirts with guys a lot. At first glance Caroline seems like a stuck up, self centered bitch, but in truth, she just wants to be liked. Most importantly she's afraid to admit she is in fact a homosexual, a lesbian. Terrified of ridicule and judgement of her "Popular" friends.


Biography - Appearance - Description -





Caroline was born and raised in Ireland until her mother became pregnant with her soon to be sister when she was three years old, eventually the growing family moved to Dunsfold, Britain where Caroline's father grew up. Caroline's life in Britain came to an abrupt end after four years when her father died in the military, killed by a rouge domestic terrorist. Her mother took herself and her sister to America months later to get away from those cold memories. America was a big push for Caroline but she quickly adapted. It wasn't until middle school when she realized just how much people liked her, soon she was hanging with the "Popular" crowd. Caroline had many boyfriends in high school although the relationship never lasted long. She didn't date guys because she liked them, only because it made her seem even more popular or maybe to get revenge.


Height- 5"5


Weight- 128 lb


Measurements- 18-7-10


Hair length- 13 inches


Hair Color- Light chess-nut brown


Shoe size- Female size 6.5





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Short, simple, and she seems like an easy character to play. But why are her feet so tiny if she's 5'5" and 127 lbs?


 
*works in the shoe department at Kohl's*
 
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First things first—the character sheet threw me off a bit. Maybe it's my eyes, but I feel like the cursive font is a little hard on the eyes. Plus it all looks the same, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but you typically want your character sheet to reflect your character. I would maybe choose a different font and/or alternate between fonts, especially for the fields e.g. [name:, age:, etc.]. It helps accentuate things a little better, I think.


I would rather have the picture on top than on bottom. It's a lovely picture and it's always good to give your readers an immediate visual. Center it for easier readability and perhaps add a thin, black border to lend a solid feel to the entire ensemble. Here's an example of one of my own character sheets: Wilderness Survival for Idiots | RpNation.com - Best Roleplay Forum


Remember that you don't have to take anything I say to heart. I'm just giving you my honest opinion :)


Now, as to the character herself, I think this is a great start. I can see Caroline being an interesting addition to all kinds of roleplays. It reads like you're still getting a handle on who she is, which of course, is fine. Just don't be afraid to flesh her out and make her more 3D. Filling out questionnaires and "interviewing" her like a real person are great exercises for developing more depth to your characters.


I felt like the measurements and the shoe size information was kind of overkill. I was a little confused, honestly -- you were vague about her history and the details of her personality and then you gave her shoe size and hair length?? I'm not judging or anything but it was kinda odd, haha.


And .. I think that's all? Like I said, don't take me too seriously! Again, just my personal opinion. You're super creative and I love how you're not afraid to venture into the LGBTQ+ realm. That's where I spend a lot of my time, too :D
 
riahxoxo said:
First things first—the character sheet threw me off a bit. Maybe it's my eyes, but I feel like the cursive font is a little hard on the eyes. Plus it all looks the same, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but you typically want your character sheet to reflect your character. I would maybe choose a different font and/or alternate between fonts, especially for the fields e.g. [name:, age:, etc.]. It helps accentuate things a little better, I think.
I would rather have the picture on top than on bottom. It's a lovely picture and it's always good to give your readers an immediate visual. Center it for easier readability and perhaps add a thin, black border to lend a solid feel to the entire ensemble. Here's an example of one of my own character sheets: Wilderness Survival for Idiots | RpNation.com - Best Roleplay Forum


Remember that you don't have to take anything I say to heart. I'm just giving you my honest opinion :)


Now, as to the character herself, I think this is a great start. I can see Caroline being an interesting addition to all kinds of roleplays. It reads like you're still getting a handle on who she is, which of course, is fine. Just don't be afraid to flesh her out and make her more 3D. Filling out questionnaires and "interviewing" her like a real person are great exercises for developing more depth to your characters.


I felt like the measurements and the shoe size information was kind of overkill. I was a little confused, honestly -- you were vague about her history and the details of her personality and then you gave her shoe size and hair length?? I'm not judging or anything but it was kinda odd, haha.


And .. I think that's all? Like I said, don't take me too seriously! Again, just my personal opinion. You're super creative and I love how you're not afraid to venture into the LGBTQ+ realm. That's where I spend a lot of my time, too :D
Click to expand...
Thank you so much for the feedback!


Its ironic to say im in Wilderness Survival For Idiots too!


As for the font, I may bold some of the headers, but Im sticking with cursive.


LGBTQ+ Is my entire life really, I almost had a heart attack when Homosexual marriage was deemed legal.
 
You're welcome, lovely! And omg, really? :D So far, WSFI is okay, I guess. They post a little fast ..


And same.
 
I've decided to take up giving constructive criticism and this is my first, so please denote anything that doesn't make sense.





Onto your CS:


Aesthetics:


I'm going to assume this was for a Casual/Simple RP (no offense intended) as it's short, but sweet. Your color scheme is well laid out and I see no visibility issues. The font is gorgeous (I personally love anything cursive) and easy to read.


Information:


I'm might come off a bit blunt, but I'm only trying to better your writing ability. I think she's a bit of a sue. She doesn't really have any faults. (No, I won't consider her being Homosexual a fault.) Give her some spice! Does she have a short-temper? Is she impatient? Are their topics she gets sensitive about? She definitely could use some more depth. Right now, she's a closeted homosexual who likes to look cute. Eesh. I agree that the hair length and shoe size is a little odd, but to each their own!


Also, flesh out her likes and dislikes a bit more. They're kind of bland and stereotypical. I'm not saying she can't like those things, but add some zest to her.


Regarding her Biography (when you get around to it) explain her German/British heritage. It's always interesting and you can get into it, especially if you actual research. It makes it seem like your character is a real person. Also, if you make a family for your character that helps too.


Picture:


You can't really see her face, which kind of put me off. I know it's hard to find face claims, for female specifically, but seeing the face is kind of important, unless you give a really descriptive appearance description.


Other Notes:


I love when I see LGBTQ+ characters! Most of mine are among that genre. (I'm Omnisexual, so I rarely make Hetero characters)


It's a really good start and if you fleshed her out a bit more, she could be a great addition!


(On a note unrelated to you, @James Logan Homosexuals are everywhere and they are very cute. Your statement made it seem like they couldn't be such.)



​
 
Asylumnated said:
I've decided to take up giving constructive criticism and this is my first, so please denote anything that doesn't make sense.



Onto your CS:





Aesthetics:


I'm going to assume this was for a Casual/Simple RP (no offense intended) as it's short, but sweet. Your color scheme is well laid out and I see no visibility issues. The font is gorgeous (I personally love anything cursive) and easy to read.


Information:


I'm might come off a bit blunt, but I'm only trying to better your writing ability. I think she's a bit of a sue. She doesn't really have any faults. (No, I won't consider her being Homosexual a fault.) Give her some spice! Does she have a short-temper? Is she impatient? Are their topics she gets sensitive about? She definitely could use some more depth. Right now, she's a closeted homosexual who likes to look cute. Eesh. I agree that the hair length and shoe size is a little odd, but to each their own!


Also, flesh out her likes and dislikes a bit more. They're kind of bland and stereotypical. I'm not saying she can't like those things, but add some zest to her.


Regarding her Biography (when you get around to it) explain her German/British heritage. It's always interesting and you can get into it, especially if you actual research. It makes it seem like your character is a real person. Also, if you make a family for your character that helps too.


Picture:


You can't really see her face, which kind of put me off. I know it's hard to find face claims, for female specifically, but seeing the face is kind of important, unless you give a really descriptive appearance description.


Other Notes:


I love when I see LGBTQ+ characters! Most of mine are among that genre. (I'm Omnisexual, so I rarely make Hetero characters)


It's a really good start and if you fleshed her out a bit more, she could be a great addition!


(On a note unrelated to you, @James Logan Homosexuals are everywhere and they are very cute. Your statement made it seem like they couldn't be such.)



​
Click to expand...
I think I will add some more detail, which will help explain why her sexuality makes her an outcast
 
haha, i like the shoe size... to be honest, i find that character bio's don't have to be super long and full of juice, that is kinda boring if you already know everything. so all in all, i like it, short but certainly not vague.
 
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