Journal Dear diary

[eyclore]

this is where I vent / talk abt my life !!
feel free to comment ig????​

 

[eyclore]

VENT 001

these days I feel that no one really cares about me. Why does my friends give me so much side eyes?
Why do people say mean things to me? Earlier this week, I was walking behind two people from my school,
then were talking about me and said bad things about me. Also, there was a girl who told me to be productive, when I
did most of the work for her. She’s constantly rude to me and tries to ruin my life. Then there’s a group of people
that i befriend and I care a lot for them, but it hurts when I see them, perhaps drawing them all except for me or remembering
memories when I was not there. I don’t blame that at all of course, but it makes me feel sad - does that sound shellfish?

then at school everybody thinks I’m weird and awkward. It’s only because I skipped a whole grade then moved to the country
and never knew how the school system there worked, which was so different. Then I became really socially anxious and i act
so awkward. I try to be positive with my irl friends all the time, even if I’m feeling down / moody etc, I still try to cheer them up or
be happy which is exhausting. My friends are drifting apart and I dom’t know what to do.
I’m going to a school next year where I’ll be going away from home for a long time and I’m scared and unprepared, I don’t know
what to do and I’m scared at how I’ll make friends, I don’t know what to do. Also my exam grades came back and I’m happy that
I got an a* for a subject, but got two F for two subjects, while my twin gets 3 A*s and no Fs. She always gets better grades than me
and I think that my mom prefers her to me, because she gets good grades.

please tell me if I’m just being shellfish / overreacting







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