As a writer, even I don't have the words to describe how badly I want some asparagus. If I saw someone with some, I would absolutely beat ass for it. Every fiber of my being is yearning for fucking asparagus. Last week I devoured an entire package in one sitting without blinking an eye. I am seriously debating spending 30 dollars to uber to the store, buy the shit, and come back. Worse of all is I don't even want it seasoned. I just want it steamed and down my throat as fast as fucking possible.