Personal Collection - Comments/Suggestions Welcomed

[chiannehere]

<p>


<span style="font-size:12px;">Left this to gather dust in 2013, I'm picking this back up on 2016. </span> I've written some since then, but I'm no writer. The extent of my writing ability is found in little quips about my life, my journals, and RPing. As much as I want to change the title of the thread now, this is basically a collection of what I've written and what I want to share. It's almost funny to see how my writing has changed (or not) throughout the years. Stay and provide a comment or two. As embarrassing as my earlier works are, I like a good laugh. Constructive criticism is also highly appreciated as well. Thanks for taking the time to read through my work! Don't be afraid to send a message and whatnot, I'm pretty friendly online. --- <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Index</span> </p>


<ul><li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243081" rel="">She Threw a Shoe</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243085" rel="">Compatibot</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243087" rel="">Night, night</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243095" rel="">The Red Thread: First Act</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243100" rel="">The world is...</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/#post-1243104" rel="">Familiar faces</a></li>


<li><a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/page-2#post-1243105" rel="">No one was there to...</a></li>


<li>


<a href="<___base_url___>/threads/personal-collection-comments-suggestions-welcomed.36635/page-2#post-6072308" rel="">What keeps you up at night?</a><span style="font-size:10px;"><span style="color:#ff8000;"><strong>*NEW</strong></span></span>


</li>


</ul><p>


</p>

 

[chiannehere]

She Threw a Shoe

​

She threw a shoe at me


and proceeded to laugh with glee.


Her bulging, big eyes displayed laughter


as she expected me to follow after.


I didn't think it was funny.


No one would get a hurting tummy


at what she did to me.


'No one would,' I thought.


'Everyone would agree.'


I wanted to snap at her


but I couldn't.


I wanted to be a monster


but I wouldn't.


I asked, "What was that for?"


She laughs and smiles a little bit more.


"I threw a shoe, you see?"


"Come on, laugh with me!"


Placing a quick 'smile' on my face,


I wanted to get out of this place.


'As if!' I angrily thought.


I wanted her to get caught.


I went back to my book;


back at her, I didn't want to look.


But what she did made me want to explode.


I wanted to get rid of the load.


I couldn't cool down.


There was no clown


that would turn my frown


upside-down.


A throbbing headache wanted to throw my lid.


I wish she could just take back what she did.


I take offense to a lot of things,


from sharp claws to spaghetti strings.


If there was one thing you shouldn't do,


please don't throw a shoe.

 

[The Dark Wizard]

Will you be posting more ?

 

[chiannehere]

I will definitely be posting more!

 

[The Dark Wizard]

I will definitely be posting more!

Looking forward to it .

 

[chiannehere]

Compatibot

​

There was once a man


who made a fantastic invention


that would calculate how compatible he is


with any woman he sees.


He began to set out and use the machine.


He saw how he was 45% compatible with a redhead,


37% with a blonde,


and 29% with a brunette.


But his main goal was a 100%.


He thought that it was going to be a cinch.


As time went on, the man began to lose hope.


He was tempted to destroy the wretched thing


and said that the whole thing was just faux


as love calculators and horoscopes.


Then one day, he began to see


an astonishing reading on his dirtied machine.


As a perky woman with purple highlights passed by,


a 100% appeared on the screen.


He looked at the machine and then at the girl.


He looked at the girl and then the machine.


He couldn't believe his eyes


and began to go after her.


What he didn't realize was that


love isn't something to be taken lightly.


He had to woo her,


he had to buy her pretty gifts,


and he had to gain approval from her parents.


Pretty soon, he was flat broke.


The woman left him;


all his belongings were gone


and all he had left was his one and only invention.


With a sigh, he began to clean his most precious instrument.


He then turned it on, wondering what had went wrong.


But what he saw was 10.0%


instead of a 100%.


( It's not really a poem, but more like a narrative... )

 

[The Dark Wizard]

Looking forward to more of your poems .

 

[chiannehere]

Back from a LONG hiatus, guys! Here's another piece that truly represents what my friend and I are feeling at that exact moment.


Night, night


Sleep tight


Don't let the bedbugs bite.


Let sugarplums dance in your head,


As you tuck your little self into bed


With a warm glass of milk


And pajamas made of silk;


With a breeze on your hair


As the angels above watch you with care.


God smiles up your sleeping face,


Wishing 'Good night' to the human race


And they all fall asleep in one place


As their silent breathing ends the race (that is, our busy lives).


Their hearts beat slow to a calming pace,


As their features relax to a poker face


With all the mixed and different race.


The sandman comes, providing dreams


as the Humans rip at their seams.


Dreams that turn tears into a stream;


holding their breath in their dreams,


hoping that it would be as sweet as Neapolitan ice cream


But life was more bitter than it seems,


Seeing as why humans so desperately want to daydream


And escape the real hell in their life,


Where the world is only full of suffering and strife


And there is no such thing as real.


Everything has just lost their appeal.


Things are approved with a seal,


From complex ideas to a simple meal.


Secret things happen through a deal,


To the point where they have lost the ability to feel.


This is a little collaboration with me and my friend. We were both tired and about to go to sleep until I saw her text, which started as 'Night'. I answered back with a 'Night', and then it went on from there. Unfortunately, by the time I sent her the last line, she had slept and after a few minutes, I went to sleep myself. Thought it was pretty good, since I don't do well with collabs, but here you are! We might finish this one way or another.

 

[MDL]

The first is genius, the second one is nahh and the third one is really good!

 

[chiannehere]

"She Threw a Shoe" came up when one of my least favorite people actually threw a shoe at me... while I was reading! You don't just throw a shoe when someone is traversing the world of written words! xD Poured all my anger at that poem, I did. The point of "Compatibot" was that you don't just rely on things like horoscopes or any other things like that. While they may be fun to read, and I know cause I read those almost all the time, just go with life and, especially love. I guess I needed to work on that poem a little bit more.


And the last one, I loved it too! I just wish we had time to finish it. I decided to title it, "The product of Sleeplessness and Depression".

 

[MDL]

I will be subscribed to this thread. I love your stuff.

 

[chiannehere]

Thanks for subscribing! It really means a lot!

 

[MDL]

Thanks for inspiring me to write my first poem. At least I hope it's a poem!

 

[chiannehere]

A new poem coming up! For a little sneak peak, this was inspired by a few events that have happened in my young life.


"A story would suffice,"


she said, painfully reminiscing thrice.


"If only Fate didn't have to be


a complete asshole, you see."

 

[MDL]

I can't wait!

"A story would suffice,"
she said, painfully reminiscing thrice.


"If only Fate didn't have to be


a complete asshole, you see."

Epic.

 

[chiannehere]

The Red Thread: The First Act

​

"A story would suffice,"


she said, painfully reminiscing thrice.


"If only Fate didn't have to be


a complete asshole, you see."


"Once upon a time,


two couples entwine.


Both had a child


and at that moment, they smiled."


"But Fate decided to play a little game,


something that would put anyone to shame.


With one end of the witch's famous Red String,


she attached one end to her, who was only a little thing.


He had the other end, not knowing what it would bring."


"Yet, the String was attached to both of their hearts,


wreaking havoc and trouble on both their parts.


So, no matter how long the delay


they will cross paths, no matter how far away."


"After twelve fateful years,


and all the sighs and tears,


they finally met.


And thus, the trap is set."


"She came from the other side of the world


with caramel-colored skin and hair uncurled.


He had the same caramel-colored skin


yet his hair was curled."


"At first sight, she was attracted,


yet because of her troubled heart, she was distracted


by a profanity-mouthed bad boy.


But such a fling wouldn't destroy


the infamous red thread."

 

[MDL]

Very well done. I think the opening was amazing the end was decent. Great job, I enjoyed it.

 

[chiannehere]

Thanks. To be honest, I was rushing through the short story that I had made when I was texting a friend. There is going to be another part to this poem and, even though I think its kind of cliche, I hope that it would be as unique as I try to make it.

 

[MDL]

I'm looking forward to reading it.

 

[Ninva]

Is English your first language?

 

[chiannehere]

Yes, English is my first language.


A few words sprung from my own wellspring of wisdom:


The world is... a scary place

a beautiful face

a tedious

race

a

dangerous

mace

a fickle pace

worn-out

lace

And all we can do is live.

​

 

[MDL]

Yes, English is my first language.
A few words sprung from my own wellspring of wisdom:


The world is... a scary place

a beautiful face

a tedious

race

a

dangerous

mace

a fickle pace

worn-out

lace

And all we can do is live.

​

You are a bringer of truth.

 

[chiannehere]

Thanks! Although you might want to thank the boredom of finals for this one...

 

[MDL]

Bless the finals!

 

[chiannehere]

Familiar faces, familiar places:


A changed heart.


Unknown places, unknown faces:


A chained heart.