Micheal Lee Keeton

[Kraftysloth]

Micheal Lee Keeton

Games the Character has been involved with

Rebel x behaved roleplay

Basics

Name: Micheal Lee Keeton


Age: 16


Ethnicity/Nationality: Caucasian


Gender: Male


Sexual Orientation: Female


Occupation: Attends Highschool

• Appearance
• Personality
• History
• Equipment
• Skills

• Appearance
  
  Height: 6 feet 4 inches
  
  
  Weight: 145 lbs
  
  
  Hair: longish black hair that extends to his eyebrows
  
  
  Eyes: Dark blue
  
  
  Body: Skinny
  
  
  Attire: Ripped jeans and a black sweatshirt
  
  
  Tall, Skinny, Long black hair, black sweatshirt, Jeans, pale skin
  
  
  
• Personality
  
  Loner, quiet, quick to anger, hateful, quick to violence
  
  
  
• History
  
  Micheal had a rough life, his father left him and his mother when he was 4 years old and his mother resorted to being a drunk and when this happened she shut Micheal out and he had to learn early on to do stuff himself. His mother occasionally went violent and tried to beat him causing him to leave home and skip school and be an all around delinquent.
  
  
  
• Equipment
  
  pocket knife, old phone, and his fathers watch
  
  
  
• Skills
  
  Fighting, stealing, and lying
  
  
  

 

[Circus]

Is your character a male who identifies as female or is a male that is heterosexual? Bit confusing.


At 6'4" and 145 lbs he is very, very skinny. Hard time believing he is also a good fighter.


"Loner" and "quiet" characters are a dime-a-dozen. Maybe he is "unsociable" instead. It is hard to RP with characters that don't enjoy interacting with others.

 

[Kraftysloth]

Thank you for the constructive criticism ill change my character a little and he is male and on the contrary i rp fine with loner type characters

 

[AnimeliaAnimalia]

@Iceblade227 Sorry, I really hope you're okay with how long and nitpicky this got. (' ) I agree with Circus about the weight and height/fighting thing, a bit hard to believe. :sweat: And yeah, the orientation thing is a bit confusing as well. Perhaps changing the "gender" section to "biologically male"?


About loner characters, I personally love them a lot, as in I like to watch them interact with other characters, buuuuut, well, that can be the problem a lot of the time. If your character is a loner, why is he/she/they interacting with people? Hopefully another character is REALLY pushy or for some inexplicable reason, REALLY likes the loner character(which honestly doesn't really happen in real life that much) enough to keep trying but if your character is SUPER antisocial, well, it can be hard, to say the least. The best solution I personally have found is to have some circumstance/s forcefully have them socialize and work together with others, and/or have a special skill/ability/thing/whatever that the other characters want/need. (^.^)


Anyways, aside from that, unfortunately, Michael feels, well, a little bit flat to be honest. Why is he a loner? It might seem obvious to you as the creator, but I don't really see anything in his history that would turn him into a loner. For example, it makes sense that he would run away from home and consequently leave school, but couldn't that mean that he joined a gang or was homeless on the street? Doesn't necessarily mean he turns into an antisocial loner...Also, where/when did he learn how to fight? Was it to defend himself against his mom? Something else? :question:


Also, well, it says that Michael is quick to fight and is primarily aggressive, which could be a result of the beating he took from his mother(but kind of counters his supposed antisocial personality, if he's quick to fight and aggressive wouldn't he seek out trouble instead of avoid it?) but is that all? This makes it seem more like he's some sort of monster or animal(which is totally fine if you were aiming for that), reacting to the abuse he took and nothing more. If you would like him to appear more human, a few simple things would greatly help. What does he like? What does he dislike? Does he have any fears? What are his goals? Does he even have any? Little things like that help a character feel more real and help the rest of us connect with him/her since we also have likes/dislikes/fears/goals. ( ) What I personally think will really move your character development, is Michael's feelings towards his parents. Is he bitter over his father's abandonment? Is he mad at his mother? Afraid? Sympathetic? Does he still want to feel connected to his Dad?(since he apparently keeps his watch with him)


Sorry, this got really long and probably boring (' :| ) All of these are just suggestions, of course. And it's not like I'm some sort of expert either so take it with a grain of salt. Best of luck with your character! :bigsmile: