oxblood
Lurker
lol hi i'm really new to this site, um so if some1 wants to talk me through it and whatnot, i'd be eternally grateful. i'm from quotev and our roleplay rules, i feel, are a bit different than here? yeah, um, idk. thanks :^)
:^) help me :^)
- Thread starter oxblood
- Start date
Status: Undead
Lord of the Frogs! RIBBIT!
Hmm, it's too tedious to type on my phone and explain things to you, so I'll have to respectfully decline your request and retaliate with a counter-offer.
My request to one 'oxblood', is for you to be my friend. It's a rather wonderful idea. There are a few terms and conditions though.
1. You must always be happy around one 'Status: Undead'. Henceforth referred to as "the contract holder".
2. To show your happiness to the contract holder, you must smile at all times, even when the contract holder is not around, since you never know if the contract holder might see you before you see the contract holder, thus letting the contract holder see you smile-less, and therefore, not happy.
3. You must, if you haven't already, move AND permanently live in the contract holder's city, wherever the contract holder may live. This is to allow the ability to follow later items in this legally binding contract.
4. You must deliver fresh baked bread to the contract holder. The delivery will be made daily, hand delivered, though not necessarily hand made, to the contract holder's home, before noon.
5. You must catch EVERY, SINGLE, frog/toad that the contract holder notices, even if it's noticed in an ad, online, on the television, etc. Location and rarity of frogs/toads will not be an applicable excuse, neither is telling the contract holder you've been in the middle of the African jungles for two years now, or any other possible outcome that doesn't involve the exact frog/toad the contract holder noticed being delivered to the contract holder.
Noticing the contract holder noticing frogs/toads is the responsibility of one 'oxblood', who shall henceforth be referred to as 'friend'.
6. The contract holder's 'friend' shall not have any other friends besides the contract holder. Friends includes friends and family, coworkers, students and teachers, peers, or any other living human being, unless necessary, such as for grocery shopping by the 'friend' for the contract holder.
7. The 'friend' shall not bother the contract holder while the contract holder is hanging out with the contract holder's friends.*
8. 'Friend' must never look the contract holder in the eyes.**
9. 'Friend' must read the contract holder a bed time story every night, and sing the contract holder a lullaby before bed, every day. No exceptions.
10. 'Friend' must like frogs. ***
11. The contract holder will immediately inherit all that the 'friend' owns. This includes money, material objects, friends and family, since those are forbidden, as detailed in number 6. The contract holder also inherits all immaterial objects, such as 'friend' 's thoughts and ideas, their emotions and their dreams. This does exclude uncomfortable body aches, or diseases, or any malus.
12. The contract holder must be placed above any God/s or deity/is in the' friends' life. This includes all beings and things.****
13. 'Friend' must learn a new recipe every week and demonstrate 'friend' 's mastery of said recipe. If mastery of the recipe isn't shown, as decided by the contract holder, then the 'friend' must make the meal again next week. This does mean that the 'friend' could potentially make several meals a week if 'friend' lacks the mastery needed.
14. 'Friend' must give the contract holder a hug at every possible moment. *****
*friend or friends is NOT the same as 'friend' or 'friends'.
**The 'friend' looking in the eyes of the contract holder is wrong for several reasons;
It undermines the contract holder in an aggressive act to subvert the contract holder and distract the contract holder from finding frogs.
It may also be seen as an attempt to get the contract holder to fall in love with the 'friend', which is a breach of this contract.
***Liking frogs has been proven, scientifically*+*, to grant immortality.
*+*Evidence is shown in the contract holder's "claimed" fifteen-thousand years alive. Claimed has to be in quotes according to the scientific community, along with this disclaimer.
****This simply means that if the 'friend' were to make a list of the most important/influential/motivational/etc. people, places, things, ideas, or anything else, that the contract holder must be #1
***** This does not include moments when the contract holder is busy, such as in a conversation with someone, playing games, watching videos, etc. This does include, however, when the contract holder changes direction hard enough to warrant a brief pause in movement, when the contract holder just wakes up in the morning and stands up, stretching before starting the day, or any other number of occasions.
I bet this sounds like a super idea, doesn't it
oxblood
?******
******If anyone else likes this idea, I can substitute all instances of "'oxblood'" from the contract with your name instead!
My request to one 'oxblood', is for you to be my friend. It's a rather wonderful idea. There are a few terms and conditions though.
1. You must always be happy around one 'Status: Undead'. Henceforth referred to as "the contract holder".
2. To show your happiness to the contract holder, you must smile at all times, even when the contract holder is not around, since you never know if the contract holder might see you before you see the contract holder, thus letting the contract holder see you smile-less, and therefore, not happy.
3. You must, if you haven't already, move AND permanently live in the contract holder's city, wherever the contract holder may live. This is to allow the ability to follow later items in this legally binding contract.
4. You must deliver fresh baked bread to the contract holder. The delivery will be made daily, hand delivered, though not necessarily hand made, to the contract holder's home, before noon.
5. You must catch EVERY, SINGLE, frog/toad that the contract holder notices, even if it's noticed in an ad, online, on the television, etc. Location and rarity of frogs/toads will not be an applicable excuse, neither is telling the contract holder you've been in the middle of the African jungles for two years now, or any other possible outcome that doesn't involve the exact frog/toad the contract holder noticed being delivered to the contract holder.
Noticing the contract holder noticing frogs/toads is the responsibility of one 'oxblood', who shall henceforth be referred to as 'friend'.
6. The contract holder's 'friend' shall not have any other friends besides the contract holder. Friends includes friends and family, coworkers, students and teachers, peers, or any other living human being, unless necessary, such as for grocery shopping by the 'friend' for the contract holder.
7. The 'friend' shall not bother the contract holder while the contract holder is hanging out with the contract holder's friends.*
8. 'Friend' must never look the contract holder in the eyes.**
9. 'Friend' must read the contract holder a bed time story every night, and sing the contract holder a lullaby before bed, every day. No exceptions.
10. 'Friend' must like frogs. ***
11. The contract holder will immediately inherit all that the 'friend' owns. This includes money, material objects, friends and family, since those are forbidden, as detailed in number 6. The contract holder also inherits all immaterial objects, such as 'friend' 's thoughts and ideas, their emotions and their dreams. This does exclude uncomfortable body aches, or diseases, or any malus.
12. The contract holder must be placed above any God/s or deity/is in the' friends' life. This includes all beings and things.****
13. 'Friend' must learn a new recipe every week and demonstrate 'friend' 's mastery of said recipe. If mastery of the recipe isn't shown, as decided by the contract holder, then the 'friend' must make the meal again next week. This does mean that the 'friend' could potentially make several meals a week if 'friend' lacks the mastery needed.
14. 'Friend' must give the contract holder a hug at every possible moment. *****
*friend or friends is NOT the same as 'friend' or 'friends'.
**The 'friend' looking in the eyes of the contract holder is wrong for several reasons;
It undermines the contract holder in an aggressive act to subvert the contract holder and distract the contract holder from finding frogs.
It may also be seen as an attempt to get the contract holder to fall in love with the 'friend', which is a breach of this contract.
***Liking frogs has been proven, scientifically*+*, to grant immortality.
*+*Evidence is shown in the contract holder's "claimed" fifteen-thousand years alive. Claimed has to be in quotes according to the scientific community, along with this disclaimer.
****This simply means that if the 'friend' were to make a list of the most important/influential/motivational/etc. people, places, things, ideas, or anything else, that the contract holder must be #1
***** This does not include moments when the contract holder is busy, such as in a conversation with someone, playing games, watching videos, etc. This does include, however, when the contract holder changes direction hard enough to warrant a brief pause in movement, when the contract holder just wakes up in the morning and stands up, stretching before starting the day, or any other number of occasions.
I bet this sounds like a super idea, doesn't it
oxblood
?************If anyone else likes this idea, I can substitute all instances of "'oxblood'" from the contract with your name instead!