Advice/Help does anyone else get nervous about writing with new partners?

[kakueri]

i'm not super new to this whole roleplaying thing, so maybe it's just me but i've had instances in the past where i've talked to potential partners only for things to ultimately just...not go anywhere? it's odd but we'd get along great and come up with so many ideas but then they'd ghost on me after i send the starter. and because they never actually say why i'm not sure what to think? were our writing styles not compatible? is there something wrong with my writing? did something come up in their lives or did they just suddenly lose interest? so now almost every time i talk to someone new i have all of those possibilities floating around in my head and it makes me hesitate to really dive into new stories with people...if i know there's a problem then i'd want to fix it but if there's no communication (they leave without a word and i honestly don't want to bother them beyong that point?) then what else can i do to...better my 'writer self-esteem' i guess.

can anyone else relate?

also note that i only write this way for purely aesthetic reasons. i definitely know how to write properly.

 

[Onmyoji]

Ghosting happens and just need to accept it as an inevitable side of roleplaying hobby. There is no point inalways trying to find what you did wrong. In many cases you did nothing wrong. Maybe your partner just lost interest because real life took over and they just don't feel like roleplaying anymore. Maybe they got a shiny new rp that attracts all their interest at the moment. Maybe your writing styles or ideas are really incompatible, but they are too shy to tell you this... Sometimes it really just doesn't go anywhere because you and your partner had different ideas in mind when you started communication...

Sometimes asking them directly helps, sometimes it doesn't. All people are different.

There are millions of reasons why that can happen, and it happens to everyone, no matter how good writer / roleplayer / person you are.

It's always useful to analyse and improve your writing, but it isn't always the reason why your partners disappear from you.

 

[kakueri]

Ghosting happens and just need to accept it as an inevitable side of roleplaying hobby. There is no point inalways trying to find what you did wrong. In many cases you did nothing wrong. Maybe your partner just lost interest because real life took over and they just don't feel like roleplaying anymore. Maybe they got a shiny new rp that attracts all their interest at the moment. Maybe your writing styles or ideas are really incompatible, but they are too shy to tell you this... Sometimes it really just doesn't go anywhere because you and your partner had different ideas in mind when you started communication...

Sometimes asking them directly helps, sometimes it doesn't. All people are different.

There are millions of reasons why that can happen, and it happens to everyone, no matter how good writer / roleplayer / person you are.

It's always useful to analyse and improve your writing, but it isn't always the reason why your partners disappear from you.

all good points! i guess it's because i've mostly stuck to some of my long-term partners that a part of me felt like i forgot how to connect with new people o v o" having anxiety doesn't help either but having fun is most important! no use in fretting over something i can't control (i tell myself this every day and yet...xD)! thank you for taking time out of your day to reply to me!!

 

[Onmyoji]

having anxiety doesn't help either but having fun is most important! no use in fretting over something i can't control

yes, basically that XD Keep reminding that to yourself!

It's fine to feel a little nervous when talking to new people, especially when you're used to having same long-term partners for a while. But I hope those ghosting incidents won't affect you too much, it really happens to everyone and quite often.