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A small, dark story opening

ValkyrieRose

Endless Witch
For a while i've been struggling to come up with anything decent... not so much writiers block more like...storytellers block? I've been trying to think of character and story concepts for a while but i haven't been able to write anything relatively worth. Then today i just began writing and before i knew it something... i think halfway decent came through my fingers, and i wanted to share


I don't know if i'll actually GO anywhere with this, this its just an 'opening' per se. As a warning, it does get a bit dark. towards the end. I think i took some inspiritation from the noragami anime series on some parts of this, or i might just be over think things. Tell me what you like, if it was bad rushed im just looking for some general comments about it really, maybe some reassurance that my writing doesn't completely suck x.x... and if it's too cliche or not.


once again, it gets a bit dark. nothing uber gorery though. Just...grim


*proceeds to hide in a corner*


---


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]On the sandy road , among the wooden  houses around her, the goddess moved quickly.  There was nothing around that could stop her, nothing that could see her, for she  could not be seen by mortal men… unless she wished so. Sudh was a gift that all  of her kind possessed. In her hand was a cold  blade, shining black and red in the silver moonlight.  Her blonde hair shone, lighting up the area as she jumped  forward.  An explosion rang where she had been standing moments before.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]A battle raged on among the mortals, none of them suspecting anything was wrong. The goddess of misfortune  fought against a beast easily two or three times her size, a swinging mass of arms and legs. If she had to describe it, she would say the monster looked a lot like a buddha statue…. If buddha statues had 8 arms and could crush a building by grabbing it…. Well, not the actual building… more like the spiritual energy of it… details. Either way, this thing wanted her gone. The creature was the guardian deity of this town, an unseen hand of defense that stopped ill omens from coming upon the town, ensuring they live in peace.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]And to a guardian that stops ill omens, Akeldama was the final boss.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]It roared and  howled, throwing spiritual energy of objects and builds at him. Spiritual energy could be used in such manners..  The houses would feel cold, dark for a bit until the energy returned, but that was a small price to pay if it meant defending it from the monster that threatened to ruin everything.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Akeldama jumped forward, clearing  a height of a building easily, dodging the latest of onslaughts. She turned malchance to the side, parrying a series of quick jabs from the deity. Red flashed in her eyes, a cool and quiet demeanor filling her eyes. She briefly thought about what she was doing, and what killing this thing meant…[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Each blow came to her, each blow was pushed to the side, deflected by the blonde goddess. She was beginning to understand how this deity thought. Every guardian was different troublesome in their own special way. This one must have been one of combat before t swore to protect this town, however long ago that happened.  It’s movements were precise and deadly… someone with lesser reflexes would have been killed ages ago. It preferred throwing things as a distraction while it got close and personal… using its massive size and fists to tower above her and let speed and gravity aid him. It was an effective tactic.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]She took a breath, focusing. This thing had either arms. It punched at a hard to see rhythm… it was probably doing that on purpose, to stop heer from getting a timing on when to go in, and when she moved to attack he quickly blocked everything. All of this made for one VERY annoying pissed off buddha.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Akeldama, after analyzing all of this, let go of her hold on the ground, allowing each blow to send her back at a quick pace. The guardian saw its chance… no one would miss it, and pursued her as she flew into a building, punching her continuously, knocking her back further and further… and then it punched thin air and howled as a sudden pain flared up in its hand.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]It recalled, looking at its hand… she hadn’t done anything, so how…? He looked around. He was at the outskirts of the city, with only a few buildings behind him. Ah, he had reached the boundary. Once a guardian swears protection to a cirty he can’t leave it’s city limits, not without removing his protection. Was Akeldama’s plan to get him to do that? He laughed. He would protect this town,, and if he had to sit at the border like a damn junkyard dog, he’d do it![/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Speaking of which...where was she. He blinked… his second of thinking had caused him to lose sight of the blonde.  To the sides? No. Below him? He would have felt the tremors of the earth. That meant…[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]He looked up. A blonde woman in the air as  she partially blocked out the light of the full moon. He caught the sight of red… cold, red eyes… and for the first time speaking, he could her her talking.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“This is the land of forgotten hope, your blasphemy will not be allowed.” [/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px]She said. She tapped her fingers to her sword, which began to pulse.[/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px] “Here me! I am The Goddess Akeldama, and with the blade of  despair I sever ties with this  city and expel thy purification!”[/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px] She said, moving her  fingers along the blade it began to pulse with a black and red menacing light.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The deity knew what this was. The Rites of Salted Earth.. Used exclusively by the gods of despair it dould erase the existence of anything in their way if they managed to beat whatever was stopping them…. But it was...far, far more than that…. Far more dreadful than a simple exorcism…[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]It howled It couldn’t allow it. He couldn't allow this monster to win. At this point, he was willing to sacrifice his own life. The town… the town would come into ruin! IT roared, it’s eight arms glowing as it put all of its energy into this attack… all eight at once, creating an blockable massive haymaker![/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Akeldama fell… no, it was more accurate to say she descended, she turned midair, finding a way through...right in the middle, barely big enough for her to squeeze through. She rotated her body and her sword obeying, slicing through the arms… all eight of them, and the deity howled.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The sound of a woman hitting the floor… then eight quishes hitting dusty . She got up, and advancing towards the enemy. Chilled red eyes, a blade cloaked with black and red flame… powerless as it was, the deity watched as she took her blade with her second hand, rushing at her.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“I salt the earth you stand on! Shatter!” She finished, and with that, she cleaved the enemy in two. It gave a howl of pain… a squeal that the mortals could hear… their guardian deity meeting its end…. Though that was only the beginning.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]A pulse resounded throughout the city., the mortals couldn’t see it, but the spirits, the energy around them, had faded away, leaving a red, dome like area over the city., the direct result of Akeldama’s curse.  The area dropped a few degrees instantly, causing the few outside still to shiver… while the more spiritually aware humans opened their eyes, all of them sensing at once that something had come to judge them.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]She hopped up on a building overlooking the city, a calm, quiet demeanor around her.  If she looked up, the moon would appear to be a blood red due to the lack of spirits in the area… it painted quite the site. She had cursed this city...it would soon, somehow, meet it’s end, though she knew not how.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]She stood there, silently, overlooking the city. She was always interested in how those she caused ill fate actually received it. Even she could not fully predict, though she had gotten quite good at it. A plague perhaps? A sudden appearance of demons, attracted to chaos as they often were?[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Akelllll~” Came  the sound of  a girl,  a stream of dark hair as her waist was suddenly hugged. A gothic, lolita sort of girl, looking up at her. “You left me at camp you big bully. I felt the field all the way from ther… why didn’t you tell me you were going to have some fun. You were supposed to stay with me, you know!”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Oh...Lukafer.” Akel said quietly, looking at the girl.  She had dark purple eyes to match her gothic dress, and a grin on her face. Lukafer was, like her, one of the eight gods of despair. She reigned over war and battle… but she was young.  She had been slain a few years ago, and had been reborn a short while ago, thus her child like state. The other  gods of despair tended to look after one another when such events happened… Akel guessed it was her turn and she hadn’t realized it. “YOu came when you sensed the Rites of Salted Earth?”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Ya! I remembered a bit a bout them!  When you sue it to kill a good guardian a bunch  of bad stuff will happen, right?”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“That’s right.” AKeldama said with a smile, ruffling the girls hair “It’s  a curse i only use against cities i’m contracted to fuck with, or particularly annoying enemies… I was only going to ruin the family i was contracted to mess with, but it went and pushed me.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]S; what’s gonna happen what’ll- it-be~” The girl asked, singing her question. When akeldama shrugged, she clapped raising her hand. “Hey hey could i help?”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The blond looked at the girl. “Hm? This place is going to hell anyway. You want to speed it up?”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Ya! I heard exercising your power could help you remember a lot..right?”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“That’s true.. Alright, come here, you.” Akeldama sad with a slight motherly smile as she picked the giggling girl up. “You need to close your eyes and focus.  Feel the lack of energy around you, the death of the spirits brings about negative, chaotic energy, primal energy that we of despair can manipulate. Remember who you are, what you are. Let your essence mix in with the energy, and then just, release it, like you're hugging something then letting it go.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Like i’m….kay….” Lukafer acknowledged, closing her eyes. Akeldama could fel it, waves of negative energy. Even after dying, you could never forget how to be yourself… Lukafer was probably realizing that herself. A few seconds later, the wave of war shot out around her… it was weak compared to what the fully powered Goddess of War cold do, but it should have an effect of some sort… but what…[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]This town was mostly peaceful, had been for centuries, so what matter of chaos would cause this place to erupt into war… ah there we go a gun shop owner.  He usually remained in business mostly to provide hunting equipment, ammo for the men, and the shooting range… but tonight he was out with a hunting rifle seeing the first person, he aimed and fired, killing the walking civilian. Shrieks and cries rang out as another was shot[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Did i do that? Luka asked, looking down on the man.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“You sure did!” Akeldama said, patting her head with a smile. “When you’re at the full strength, you can cause civil war, fights between nations, you name it. I’m sure you’ll be strong quickly!” She says. “Now, let’s watch a bit more, things are sure to get interesting.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]It took about 2 minutes for the police arrived, rather quick for a lazy police station… then again it was pretty close by. An officer emerged from its vehicle, raising a gun and shooting… but nothing came out. The man lowered his gun to the side, checking for  a jam but not enough of an idiot to have it close to his face. Moving the chamber, the gun suddenly fired, hitting the gas tank of his car.  The resulting explosion caused the car to flip over onto one of the other squad cards, killing all involved with relative ease.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Oh, was that you, Akel?” The chibi goddess of war asked looking up at her.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Well, i didn’t do that directly, but that was probably a result of my Salted Earth, yes.” She says, looking down, a mischievous smile on her face. “Look at the other cars, they are completely stupefied by what’s happening… think you can exert your influence again? We might be able to cause a bit more fun.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]A short burst of power later, and the police got out, looking at the police survivor, the one who had shot the tank. “What  the fuck do you think you’re doing?! You just got like, 4 of our men killed!”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Hey shut the hell up i didn’t mean to!” The police officer said… he looked completely terrified. One of the other officers had his pistol trained on him, his hands shaking. “Theyh were my friends to you know! Put that thing down!”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The police officer lowered his gun but it fired mid way, an accidental firing caused from a jam in the gun, a very, very rare occurrence, but the damage was done, the officer shot in the leg. He blanched. “I… i didn’t do that! The gun! It was just-” Those were the last words spoken as he fell from a retaliation bullet.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Chaos grew from there as the police began fighting among themselves, all the while a very angry gn shop owner shot at civilians, the police to blinded by the fog of war buzzing around them… soon  the panic began to spread, and other civilians came out with guns of their own  to defend themselves… neighbor shot at a neighbor in a panic, guns began jamming, fights over girls long though buried.[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“Akelll what is that prayer that people sometime say to us?” Luka asked her voice echoing over the chaos that was soon engulfing the area. “I seem to remember bits and pieces of it.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“You mean the Psalm of Despair?” Akeldama asked, giving the lolita a warm, motherly smile as she picked her up, giving her a piggy back ride as she leapt off the building, landing on the ground. “[/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px]*We entreat thee, those of the negative realm for the universe is tainted with the pride of the holy.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]She continued walking, lolita in tow as everyone began to fire, the city engulfed in chaos. “[/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Descend upon the world, immortal beacons of balance for the stains of what is ‘right’ cannot be washed by faith alone.”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]They passed a couple fighting with another couple over a car… shots quickly rang out and the car exploded, engulfing both of them. “Oh oh, i rememebr!” Luka said, and hummed, almost like a song. “[/SIZE][SIZE=14.666666666666666px]We cry out to those, the 8  whose despair balances all. We worship the names of the true order, and cry out for the salvation of chaos, for blood and change must run it’s course~”[/SIZE]


[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]“That’s a good girl~” Akel said, petting her hair, leaving the city limits…  and as they left, None remained standing.[/SIZE]
 

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