Realistic or Modern 「In Death's Kiss」Character Sheets

[Cychotic]

interest check
MAIN RP​

DR. ANTON

BASIC
Title: Doctor
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Sexuality: ?
Date of Birth: ?

MISC
Likes:
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?
5. ?
Dislikes:
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?
5. ?

HABIT
Clicking his pen repeatedly.

PERSONALITY

---WRITE YOUR PERSONALITY HERE / at least one paragraph < 3---

Dr. Anton is a pretty smart guy who cares very deeply for his patients. He acts somewhat like a counselor, ensuring both mental and physical health. Not much is known about him, save for his kind nature and placid facade

LIFE

---WRITE ABOUT YOUR LIFE BEFORE SAN LO'S AND LIFE IN SAN LO'S HERE / at least two paragraphs < 3---

CLASSIFIED.

RELATIONS

--WRITE ABOUT YOUR PREMADE RELATIONS HERE / at least 2 sentences per relation < 3---

He pretty much is acquaintances with everyone, but knows all their medical records and physical info. He's closer to some patients more than others.

coding by cychotic

Spoiler: CODE

[centerblock=70][bg=transparent; padding: 3px; border: 1px solid grey;][div=background:transparent; border: 1px dotted grey; padding: 10px;][row][column=span3][bg=transparent; text-shadow: 1px 1px 0px grey; font-size: 24px; color:black; pointer-events: none; text-align: center;][font=Oswald]---NAME HERE---[/font]
[img]----UR IMAGE HERE---[/img]
[bg=transparent; text-shadow: none; font-size: 11px; text-align: left;][font=Cousine][b]BASIC[/b]
[b]Title:[/b] text
Age: text
Gender: text
Sexuality: text
Date of Birth: text

[b]MISC[/b]
Likes:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Dislikes:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

[b]HABIT[/b]
text (just any ol' habit your chara has)
[/font][/bg][/bg][/column]
[column=span5][bg=transparent; padding: 5px;][font=Cousine][b]PERSONALITY[/b]
[size=11px][border=1px dashed grey;][scroll=150px;]---WRITE YOUR PERSONALITY HERE / at least one paragraph < 3---[/scroll][/border][/size][/font][/bg]

[bg=transparent; padding: 5px;][font=Cousine][b]LIFE[/b]
[size=11px][border=1px dashed grey;][scroll=150px;]---WRITE ABOUT YOUR LIFE BEFORE SAN LO'S AND LIFE IN SAN LO'S HERE / at least two paragraphs < 3---[/scroll][/border][/size][/font][/bg]

[bg=transparent; padding: 5px;][font=Cousine][b]RELATIONS[/b]
[size=11px][border=1px dashed grey;][scroll=200px;]---PREMADE RELATIONSHIP DESCRIPTIONS HERE / at least two sentences per relation < 3---[/scroll][/border][/size][/font][/bg][/column][/row][/div][/bg]
[size=1]coding by cychotic[/size][/centerblock]

 

[Cychotic]

JEAN LOUISE GREY

BASIC
Title: The Daredevil
Age: 18
Gender: Female
Sexuality: Bisexual
Date of Birth: June 3rd

MISC
Likes:
1. Trying new things
2. Adventure
3. Open spaces
4. Photography
5. Flashy effects
Dislikes:
1. Being kept in one place
2. San Lo's
3. Small spaces
4. Stuck up personalities
5. Spicy foods

HABIT
Tends to rub/fiddle with a stray strand of hair when she feels any strong emotions.

PERSONALITY

"Spitfire."
Jean Louis Grey here, the one and only. Adventure and thrill seeking extraordinaire! Well, not really. You see, there's only so many hiding spots you can find within San Lo's. We're kept here like lab rats.

"Headstrong."
Anyways, I'm not your nice, sweet, 'I'm going to die but live my life helping others' type of girl. I'm pretty damn strong, I take things the way I want them, and I hate being trapped in white corridors and blank sheets.

"No filter."
You can expect me to tell you off on your 'bs', you can expect me to run wild when I can, and you can expect me never to back down from a challenge.

"Wild."
You can even say that, I, Jean Louise Grey, have no idea what consequences are. And truth be told, I don't. I have a short enough life as it is. I'm not about to spend it worrying over right or wrong, or consequences. No can do.

So if you're hanging with me in Hawaii, expect adventure, new experiences, and a crap load of living life to the fullest.​

LIFE

"Memories."
I had a life before all this. Before I found out I was destined for the morgue. (Too morbid?) Anyways, little Jean lived with a single father. My mother didn't leave us, I mean she did, but not of her own choice. Mom sacrificed her life for mine.

Crap load of bullshit that was, considering my life is so short. She should have lived a full life instead of giving me this short one. Whatever. But Dad was really nice. Taught me how to fight, taught me how to stand up for myself.

We lived in a little city apartment in New York, where Dad worked as a pretty successful programmer. Although, I didn't have the 'coding' gift he did. He said I would rather shriek in amusement parks or anywhere that was new and thrilling.

I was pretty bad in school, got terrible grades and found myself in a lot of trouble. I was always sneaking out of school and running about. It caused a lot of problems, but I loved it.

All that ended, though, when I got hospitalized when I was 10. The doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. Eventually, my father became desperate. So desperate, that he allowed San Lo's people to take me away.
He didn't know how much I would hate it here. He couldn't have.

So I don't blame him.

"Stale."
San Lo's is like a prison. Everyday, we're hauled off to take medication. Everyday, we meet in the same damn room for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I mean, during my earlier years, I explored the place. I found all of its cool nooks and crannies.

But it's not fun anymore. It's boring. It's suffocating. I want fresh air again. I want a life again. But I never really had one, did I?

I tried to steal the rose before. Ended up with a bad scrape and a big scolding. They won't let us touch it, only see it. I guess I can see why. If i could, I would destroy it. I don't want to see it every time I go eat.

It screams death the moment you lay your eyes on it. And I live my days defying doctors and wishing for freedom.
Dr. Anton is giving it to us. That stupid guy is finally doing something useful. And I'm excited.

The world better be ready for Jean Louise Grey, because she's coming at full speed.​

RELATIONS

The Innocent
Oh, you're talking about Angel, huh? Much as I hate to admit it, he's too sweet for this hospital. I mean, he looks like he fits, not gonna' lie, but he doesn't. He's all sweetness and cotton candy. And it doesn't seem very likely, but he's my closest friend.

Tames that wild side of me, well, as much as it can be tamed. Not exactly sure how he'll react to the trip, but hopefully it lets him do the things he's always been afraid to do. With me by his side, of course.

The Adventurous
My puppy, that's who he is. ReiRei follows me like a dog on a leash and I don't mind. He's willing to do anything I do so I always have someone to go to when Angel chickens out. He hates it here, too, which is a definite plus.

He's really clingy, though, and it gets irritating sometimes. A girl has to have some space every once in a while huh? Especially in a place like San Lo's.

The Overthinker
Marie Renee Bishop, that girl seriously needs to stop worrying so much. You could be talking about the smallest things and she'll make it seem as if we're all doomed to die.

I mean, we are, but she makes it worse. Kinda like the phrase making a mountain out of a mole hill. But under all that anxiety is pretty sweet girl. I don't think she hates me, so I'll make sure to help her take her mind off things in our last month. Can't die with worry wrinkles, after all.

The Mysterious
The guy, Riley, who hates Angel, right? He's okay, I guess. Very quiet and keeps to himself. He doesn't seem to like me, maybe because I'm really close with Angel.

He and Marie certainly do make a pair, though. Stoic and Anxious. Hilarious.​

coding by cychotic

 

[eunoia]

CHARLIE MAY ROSE

BASIC
Title: the Romantic
Age: 18
Gender: text
Sexuality: text
Date of Birth: text

MISC
Likes:
1. The Beach
2. Adventures
3. Sugary Substances
4. Clichés
5. Romance Novels
Dislikes:
1. Horror Movies
2. Know-It-Alls
3. San Los
4. Negativity
5. Tomatoes

HABIT
Drums her fingers when she's nervous. Hums when things get awkward.

PERSONALITY

"Optimist."
Charlie is always optimistic about the future, as well as situations in the present. She has a knack for finding the silver lining and ensures that everything is seen in a positive light.

"Compassionate."
Charlie cares deeply about others and their well-being. In San Lo's she wanted nothing more than to comfort her peers, to make sure that they were okay and to sit with them when they were lonely. The act of caring for others is how Charlie cares for herself. If someone is upset Charlie often feels guilty; as if she has failed in looking after them.

"Idealist."
Charlie not only sees the best in people, sometimes she sees what just isn't there. She sees the world as a near perfect place and can sometimes seem quite naive despite what she's gone through, however, she knows the world isn't a perfect place, she just prefers to think it is.

"Perfectionist."
Charlie is a complete and utter perfectionist. She'd rather not do something than do it wrong and the slightest little mistake can upset her. She endlessly works at things until she thinks they're perfect and often doesn't complete things because "something's missing"

"Outgoing."
Charlie wants to get to know everyone and isn't shy about it. She isn't afraid to approach strangers and compliment them and she is quick to make friends.
​

LIFE

Charlie's childhood was a happy one, both of her parents loved her, and she was taught that she could do anything that she wanted to. She spent much of her time doodling and making friends. She was the little girl you wished was your friend, always happy and full of energy and ideas of exciting new things to do. When Charlie was eight, her father passed away, little did she know that that would be the first of many days spent in the hospital. She was heartbroken, and swore away from going to hospitals for over a year. However, when Charlie was ten she had no choice in the matter, rushed in to A&E suffering from seizures, hallucinations and a ridiculously high fever, Charlie never returned home. She stayed in that hospital for almost six months, with no-one being able to diagnose her, until one day, she was transferred to a hospital called San Lo's and she hasn't left since.
Charlie hates San Lo's and though she would never admit it she wished every day that she was there that she could leave, even if that meant joining her father. So when the doctor's announced that they only had one month left to live, she was a little relieved, and when they said that they'd be free for that month? Well, Charlie was overjoyed.​

RELATIONS

---PREMADE RELATIONSHIP DESCRIPTIONS HERE / at least two sentences per relation < 3---

coding by cychotic

 

[spookie]

---ANGEL
♡
ASHFORD---

BASIC
Title: The Innocent
Age: 17
Gender: Male
Sexuality: Aro/Ace
Date of Birth: February 14th

MISC
Likes:
1. Music
2. Sweets
3. Cats
4. Nighttime
5. Palm trees
Dislikes:
1. Rudeness
2. Partying/alcohol
3. Pop music
4. Spicy food
5. Anything medical/involving needles (ESPECIALLY San Lo)

HABIT
♡ Writes lyrics on his hands/wrists so he doesn't forget them

♡ Always has candy. Always.

♡ Hides behind his floofy white hair when stressed/sad/embarrassed

PERSONALITY

Oh, hi... I'm Angel. You might've seen me around before... I've been told that I stand out from a crowd, even though I don't see how that's possible when my hair perfectly matches the hospital walls.

It's not like I want to stand out, either. I'm honestly a bit afraid of being noticed too much, and I try to avoid conflict whenever I can. Honestly, I just want everyone to like me... fighting makes my heart hurt.

Some people say i'm too naive, but maybe I don't want to see the ugliness in a world I'll be leaving so soon. It's not like knowing all the bad stuff is going to matter, at least not in my case. After all, I won't be here long enough to make a difference.

While I may be a bit oblivious to some things, I'm certainly not an optimist. In fact, I can be quite pessimistic and even a bit morbid sometimes. I try to keep it to myself as others find it upsetting, but I have a hard time not focusing on the darker aspects of our condition. I mean, living like a lab rat in a maze of white sheets and empty hallways could make anyone depressed. Did I mention how much I hate this hospital?

That's not to say I'm all doom and gloom, though. I've got plenty of sarcasm to go around, so feel free to get in line. Okay, okay, yes, I was trying to change the subject... Let's get back to the mushy emotional stuff. I care about my friends so much, I'll do anything to make their time here better. Sometimes it's difficult for me to stay cheerful, but I'll never drag someone down with me if I can help it.

It pains me more to see them hurting than it does to be hurt myself... not that I'm stoic or anything. I try not to let it show, but sometimes the pain is too much and I just get so scared...

I like to say that I'm not afraid to die, and that's partially true.. not that I'm looking forward to it or anything, obviously. If I'm being completely honest, what really scares me is living... or at least, living life to the fullest. It's not that I don't want to or anything, I've always wished for a big adventure of some sort. I guess I'm just used to hiding away and the guarded solitude that only terminal illness can bring. I hate everything about this hospital, but at least it's a familiar misery.

Honestly, I never expected I'd get a chance to do anything reckless, but... I guess there's a first time for everything, right?

LIFE

So you'd like to hear the story of a child who was born to die? Morbid, but who am I to judge?

Really, having your kid on Valentine's day and naming them Angel should be considered a death sentence... at least of the social variety. I was either going to end up a tragedy or a sleazy reality TV star, and I went with the first option. I guess that's what I get for having a starry-eyed and very single 18 year old for a mother.

Unlike a lot of kids at San Lo's, little baby Angel wasn't even healthy to begin with. They almost lost me when I was only a few days old, and truthfully I kind of wish they had. At least then I wouldn't have known what was coming, wouldn't have felt so guilty, and wouldn't have spent my entire youth crying whenever I saw a rose.

The early years weren't so bad, really. I was a sweet child with a penchant for making people smile, and my mom did what she could to take care of us, so I didn't mind going without when things got tough. Even though we lived in a low-rent city apartment, younger Angel was always outside in the sunlight. I learned a lot about animals, and even dreamed of becoming a vet one day so I could help make them feel all better. To this day, I still like animals more than people... especially cats.

School was beyond boring, but it wasn't the worst thing in the world, aside from all the bullying of course. I made a few friends, and for a month or two I actually felt like I fit in. Then I got sick. Passing out, seizures, erratic heartbeat, throwing up blood... the whole bit. I was only 8, and the world as I knew it had ended.

I spent the next few years enduring thousands of tests and being shuffled from hospital to hospital, leaving a crowd of confused doctors in my wake. Even though I was the sick one, I always felt worse for them. It couldn't have been easy to look a crying mother in the eye and tell her that you had no idea what was wrong, but that she was going to outlive her son, and the medical science you'd held so highly was completely useless to stop it. I guess I was a weird kid.

Finally, at the age of 11, I made my final transfer (not counting my upcoming one to the morgue, of course), into San Lo's. A world of hopelessness and hurt hidden behind sterile white.

I think they kept us behind closed doors for a reason, even though it was a horrible mistake on their part. I suppose, in their defense, the world was ugly. I'd seen enough hurt to last a full lifetime, and I couldn't even have one of those. No point focusing on the bad stuff.

Music was what kept me alive in San Lo's. I learned how to write songs, sing and play guitar... things that took the place of a social life. Not to say that I spent my existence in a corner or anything, though. I do have a few friends, and they mean the entire world and more to me.

You might not have guessed it, but I have a habit of wandering off and getting lost in the few secret hiding spots San Lo's had to offer. You can blame it on my social anxiety or my daredevil friend... take your pick.

I've never admitted this to anyone, but once, back when I was 15, I touched the rose. It was so cold on my skin, kind of like my hamster when I'd found him on the bottom of the cage all those years ago. I guess what I'm trying to say is... it felt like death. Don't tell anyone, though. I really don't want to get in trouble for the one of the only rebellious things I've ever done.

Everything is about to change, though. For the first time in almost a decade, I'll be able to see the outside world again. Not gonna lie, I'm a little scared... but then again, even if I screw up, it's not like I'll lose more than a month. That's optimism, right?

RELATIONS

---PREMADE RELATIONSHIP DESCRIPTIONS HERE / at least two sentences per relation < 3---

coding by cychotic

 

[classAteam]

Riley O'Peters

BASIC
Title: The Mysterious
Age: 18
Gender: Male
Sexuality: Aro/Ace
Date of Birth: April 14

MISC
Likes:
1. Reading
2. Music
3. Piano
4. Animals
5. Rain

Dislikes:
1. Loud Noises
2. Parties
3. Medicine
4. Snow
5. Tea

HABIT
~ Nail Biting
~ Stumbling over his words
~ Rubbing his neck

PERSONALITY

-- From Riley's perspective, not much can be said about his personality. He think's he's a boring guy with a boring mind. Nothing special about him, nothing special to tell. Although that's only true on some levels, there is a deeper side to him. Not many people have, but if you really get to know Riley, you'll learn the few things that make him smile. Like his unnatural obsession with all animals, or his favorite kind of coffee. However, Riley has taught himself not to open up to anyone except people he knows he can trust. Because of this, he doesn't talk as much as the normal teenager, limiting him to only a few words in every conversation. He doesn't have many friends, in fact, most people dislike him because he seems weird, so its not like he can talk to anyone anyways. Many people who first meet him, describe Riley as 'mysterious', because he's known for sitting back and observing people as they interact, and he rarely talks. --

LIFE

---"I don't really know what to say. I guess I'll start from the beginning. I was born on April 14, 1999, my mom's name is Abigail and my dad's name is Nathan. As a child, I had a lot of friends. I don't know what changed in my life that made me such a loner, even before I was admitted. I think one day everything shifted and suddenly I didn't have any friends. Anyways, my parents were pretty well off, with enough money to ensure that I'd be set when they died, and then some. I don't know why they thought it was a good idea, but apparently one child wasn't enough. That's where my sister, Grace, came in.

Elementary school was easy for me. Although I was alone most of the time, because I had no friends, I was pretty smart and the work was fun. I was the quiet kid who sat in the back of the room, and that was alright with me. I learned everything I needed to know without anyone bothering me. Growing up was really easy, except all the kids I knew were expected to be more mature. The only problem was that the kids in my school were starting to get more interested in relationships, yet I wasn't interested in any of that. At first, I thought it was only because I hadn't found the right girl, but as the years went by I realized that I experienced no romantic or sexual emotions. It didn't matter to me too much, because it wasn't like I was getting a girlfriend any time in the future, girls aren't attracted to guys like me (and I'm going to die soon, so I don't really need a girlfriend).

I remember being 8 years old when I passed out the first time. I went to the doctor, but he couldn't find anything wrong with me, so he let me go. The second time I passed out, it was different. My parents were so scared, they thought I was going to die or something (funny how that worked out). They took me to a better doctor, who costed a lot more money. The doctor was able to recognize a problem in me, but he couldn't diagnose me. After months of treatment with no results, I was sent to San Lo. The hospital isn't as bad as it seems. I mean, a year into my stay, I met a friend there, who was actually really nice to me. It's weird, I'm used to not having friends, but she just gets me. Anyways, we all have to stick to this routine, and we don't get a lot of time outside but it seriously isn't that bad. The only thing I'm worried about is our month long trip to Hawaii. What am I supposed to do there? Socialize? Have fun? How am I supposed to do that when I've grown so accustomed to my very boring life? Anyways, it's not like I really have a choice. And besides, I guess getting out of this hospital before I die will be pretty fun. Hopefully things work out."---

RELATIONS

Marie Renee Bishop
One of the people the Riley can proudly call his friend. He doesn't really know how it happened, but one day they became buds, and now they're practically inseparable.
Angel Ashford
Riley doesn't really know what it is about Angel, but he annoys the hell out of him. Seriously, he doesn't see them ever being friends.
Jean Louise Grey
Another person who just irks him for some reason. Maybe it's the fact that she's so close to Angel that he thinks she might act like him too. You can probably tell now why Riley didn't have many friends.

coding by cychotic​

 

[pasta]

Wip
"You know I'd have like a girlfriend or boyfriend if I wasn't dying."

"Look on the bright side! Now we won't have to see the troubles of adulthood."

Owen Kim •Cis gender male •Eighteen •Bisexual •Biromantic •South Korean American •Feb. 12, 1999 •The Optimistic/Jokester

Owen Kim

♡​

Distinguishing features; His eyes and smile. He looks like a bunny when he smiles.
Height; 5'10
Weight; 143 lbs
Hair color; Dark brown
Eye color; Dark brown

♡

Likes;
Pastries
Coffee
Video games
Friends
Korean dishes
Soft/slow music
Pretty things
Animals
Cool bugs like beetles
Cooking

Dislikes;
Boring things
Awkward tension
Science class
Any other type of bugs
The fact that he only has a month to live

Habits;
Playing with his earrings
His ears turn red when he's embarrassed

Personality;
Owen had always been an extremely upbeat type of person. He always made friends easier, and it was like the art of making friends came easily to him. You could even say he was relatively popular kid in school. Even after finding out he had this illness, he continued to stay optimistic. He didn't fall apart at all... Maybe that was because he didn't realize potential death was in his path. Though now that he knows, he still hasn't shown too much sadness. He always tries to lighten the mood with jokes, and he usually succeeds. The positive influences on him like his parents taught him to always look on the bright side and make light of thing. Well in appropriate situations of course.

His jokes are always a bit childish. He finds things that twelve year old boys were find funny hilarious. Though he still finds more adult jokes that require knowledge funny. But most of his jokes are stupid "gross" jokes.

♡

Relationships;

 

[Noivian]

RAYMOND "REIREI" KIMURA

BASIC
Title: The Adventurous
Age: 18
Gender: Male
Sexuality: Pansexual Demiromantic
Date of Birth: August 15th

MISC
Likes:
1. Sweets and spicy food
2. Sports and games
3. Exploring new places and trying new things
4. Traveling with friends
5. Music and social activities
Dislikes:
1. Bitter or bland food
2. Being stuck in one place for long periods of time
3. Doing the same thing over and over
4. Being told what to do
5. Being forgotten or ignored

HABIT
- Puts too much sugar in his coffee and tea
- Follows others more than he leads
- Latches onto one person and drags them every/is dragged everywhere

PERSONALITY

"Obnoxious"
Lots of people say that. I'm probably just a bit too much for them to handle sometimes. I can sometimes be a little overbearing or perhaps a tad clingy but really it's just how I show my love. I wouldn't bother with you if I didn't like you.

"Puppy"
Do NOT call me puppy! I really, really hate being referred to as a dog. It's not that I have anything against the animals, it's just kind of rude to call other people animals or act like you own someone.

"Adventurous"
I like to say I'm not one to shy away from new things, like, ever. It's the thrill of getting there that makes everything worthwhile. It's both the journey and the destination that are the best. Sometimes simply being with friends is its own reward.​

LIFE

Raymon "Reirei" Kimura was born to Yukiko and Jiro Kimura, Japanese immigrants to the United States. Wanting to give their son an "American" name so he would fit in better with his peers, they named him Raymond. However, for the first five years of his life, his parents used the nickname Reirei, so much so that it felt more natural to be called Reirei rather than his given name of Raymond.

At school, Reirei excelled at many things, taking to different subjects and making many friends, none of which he was exceptionally close to. At age of five, Reirei got a younger sister, Hannah, or Hana as her name was in Japanese. He adored his baby sister and treated her like a flower, like she was named after. It was discovered at the age of ten that Reirei had a rare disease. Distressed, Reirei's parents kept him home. He got to know his younger sister. Upset, Reirei did his best to rebel against him, mostly leading him to not take medications. Eventually, Reirei's parents had no choice but to send him to San Lo's.

Reirei immediately disliked San Lo's. He was confined to rooms and halls, and wasn't allowed to do anything fun or new. He quickly grew bored, only finding joy in what they taught him. There was so much Reirei felt he was missing out on. He grew quite clingy of the new friends he made in San Lo's, fearing he'd loose them too, like he lost his little sister. But now there's the option of going out again, now that his life is almost over. Reirei sees it as a little morbid, but is excited to go out despite everything.​

RELATIONS

Jean
-
"Jean is one of my closest friends! She always knows the coolest places to go explore, and is never scared to do so. I always look up to her when I'm scared or unsure. She's like my big sister!"

Angel
-
"Angel is like... well, he's like a small fuzz ball. He reminds me of my sister, only I intend not to loose him, too. He's a bit darker than I remember my sister being, but it's been years since I saw her last..."​

coding by cychotic

 

[JustAlexandra]

Marie Renee Bishop

BASIC
Title: The Overthinker
Age: 17
Gender: Female
Sexuality: Straight
Date of Birth: September 4th

MISC
Likes:
1. Jelly filled donuts
2. Long walks outside
3. Pets (But dogs mostly)
4. The chocolate raspberry cake from the hospital kitchen
5. Mornings
6. Cuddling/Heavy weight on her (like weighted blankets)
Dislikes:
1. Seeing or hearing about the rose
2. Being in the hospital
3. IV's/Needles
4. Scary stories
5. Watching the news

HABIT(S)
- Picking her fingernails
- Cracking her knuckles

PERSONALITY

Marie is the definition of "paranoid". She always had anxiety, even before all of this started, but the cruel fact of her impending death has made her feel that the worst is coming, all the time. In a way, it sort of is. She is a nice girl most of the time, but she is prone to abrupt panic attacks that she cannot control. Usually these make her a bit rude and irrational, and she is unable to control her reactions well. Obviously, she doesn't mean to be this way and usually feels really bad about it afterward, but it doesn't stop it from having fairly often. Otherwise, she tends to blow things way out of proportion. When any little thing is happening she has all the thoughts of things that could happen running through her head, a thousand miles a minute. She has learned to keep most of these thoughts inside, but it doesn't stop her from being anxious about it. Outside of this worrying, she still has her own thoughts and opinions, crushes, and generally thinks like a normal teenager. Just, you know, with constant anxiety.

LIFE

Before the San Los Hospital, Marie was a normal, somewhat shy girl. Her parents were always concerned about her making friends, but she was never worried about it. Perhaps it was because she was too young to worry about something like that, but not having many friends was never a real problem for her. She liked her privacy and she enjoyed reading a lot. But, when she was around her friends, she tended to be very outgoing. It was almost like two different people altogether. Her parents worried for awhile that there was something wrong with her or she had multiple personalities from how harsh the change was, but in all honesty that was just how she was. She could enjoy being with her friends but also enjoy being alone.

A few months after her eighth birthday she went to a pediatrician for a normal check up. The doctor's office she was going to had started doing blood tests, after finding that several children in the area around her age were getting some strange illness that was unexplainable. At the time, Marie was upset she had to get a shot, and tried desperately to get out of it, but to no avail. She wonders now if she would have been better off never getting that blood test, never knowing what was happening inside her body. Of course, the blood test came back positive for this mysterious disease, and she was immediately admitted into the San Los Hospital. At first, her personality plummeted - as in she basically had none. At such a young age she was terrified and was too scared to talk to anyone or even to read like she used to love to do. The doctors took note of this and introduced her to Riley O'Peters, who had the same disease and was staying in the hospital. They became the best, closest friends. This brought her out of her shell and helped her be the person she used to be. She began reading again and talking to her family. Even though her anxiety was worse than ever, she was better than she had been in weeks. Since then, she has met more people her age with the same disease, which has only helped her in a situation that almost nothing could help.

RELATIONS

Riley O'Peters - He and Marie became friends at a young age, and he was the first friend she made after being diagnosed. Now, the are practically inseperable.

Jean Lousie Grey - Marie aspires to be everything that Jean is. She wishes she could take the chances Jean does and live life the way she does, but she can never bring herself to do this. Because of this, she can be found following Jean around like a puppy at times, particularly when she is not with Riley.

coding by cychotic

 

[kou]

WHERE IS MY MIND?

⌞ii. A DREAM⌝​

name
ren boutimer

age
17

pronouns
[ she / they ]

sexuality
pansexual​

date of birth
october 23rd

books
allen ginsberg's
"howl"

laurie halse anderson's
"winter girls"​

⌞ii. A DEATH⌝​

persona
If a book could be made into a person, it would be presented - preferably with red ribbon - as one Ren Boutimer.
Having a knack for melodramatics and the ghastly, you'd think that the dying girl wouldn't have an ounce of her left to be energetic but she does and it fits her like a glove. Or at least how one would expect such a thing to fit her. In fact, many tend to forget that she will soon meet her fate and often take to treating her like a normal person until they realize the IVs in her arm aren't subject to change and she never will again see the world as they do and the smiles begin to fade and turn into mellowness that Ren never quite liked. The pitiful staring and hollow eyes are not an aesthetic that the Boutimer child strives for and although her body is failing her, her mind is most certainly not. What once was a blossoming rose has now turned into a paler shade of black and with age comes wisdom that should have never been acquired but Ren possesses a knowledge that scares some and entertains others, she is constantly finding humor in death and she rarely ever laments on a situation unless a scenario calls for it and even then it is of the exaggerated kind. Her approach on life is one without fear, without pain, without sorrow, and she is soon to pay for that line of thinking or so she believes. While it is true that Ren is not one for seriousness, it is eerie when she does become solemn and it makes her skepticism all the more prevalent and unwanted from those who are near her. After all, no one wants to know when the comedian can no longer be funny or else it ruins the job, right?

On the contrary, there is a sadness in the young girl's eyes and it may swallow you whole if you look too long and too much. Ren hides behind big words and small lies that she tells herself, she finds comfort in things that can not possibly bear fruition and she utilizes her poetry as a shield from the life that has given her nothing but immense agony. At the end of it all, there's nothing but emptiness inside and Ren is too frightened to face that part of her, too scared of what she'll see if she looks behind flesh and bone and into her own brain. She is grasping at bits of her sanity in order to keep herself afloat and that is a dangerous game.

It will only be a matter of time before she completely loses it.

biography
Poetry is a lost art and with being said, having two parents who believed in more "realistic" professions whilst still remaining supportive was the least Ren could ask for. And she did not. Her mother, Akilah, was a rather shifty woman with a sharp tongue and even sharper knowledge, she was smart and aware of it and her confidence transferred to her daughter which was a trait that Ren often hated her for. After all, we all begin to become our parents after a while, do we not? Her father, Jacques, was a more soft-hearted man with his head somewhere in between the clouds and the muddied ground, unable to decide whether he wanted to free his innermost desires or allow the weight of reality to overtake him. With such an indecisive man, Ren did not often get the comfort she wanted for her aspirations from him as he was too afraid to admit he was just like his daughter: lost and in love with life. It was a funny thing, that. It made it hard for children to understand Ren and it made it easy for older people to find a friend in her, understanding her humor as it came to her and appreciating her ability to take comfort in a book. Although this may have seemed nice at the time, Ren had no interests in being intellectual.
Rather, all she wished to do was write and be left to her own devices but people made it harder so she decided that she would forego the nicer route and chose to socialize.

Right when everything seemed at its peak, it all came tumbling down. It was as if everything that had been so orderly and perfect had been crushed and Ren found herself hospitalized at the age of 12 due to mysterious circumstances, a fever spiking and a wave of nausea and exhaustion overcoming her while she had been preoccupied with a journal she had received on her birthday at home. From then on, Ren was never quite the same. Of course, the girl was still there..but the mind was not. It was somewhere else, it had drifted off after words like "permanent stay" and "sickly" had made themselves comfortable in her hospital bed and her parents came and went too. It was as if the Boutimer family had taken themselves out of the equation and placed it in the hands of some fool in a lab coat. It was as if they could no longer bear a burden that little Ren was left to hold.

It was as if she was going to die.

relations
tba.

theme song
where is my mind? - the pixies
exit music (for a film) - radiohead