Malibu
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  • On today's episode of "My Shitty Office", I met the "cigarette fairy". I had heard rumors of the old woman who burrowed through our trash in search of discarded cigarettes before but didn't believe she existed until today. I went outside to take my break and since the dumpster is in the only shady spot on the lot, I was sitting by it. All of a sudden, this older lady, who certainly looks shabby but by no means homeless, walks up and just starts digging through the trash looking for cigarette butts (and since about 98% of my coworkers smoke, there's a lot). She then took out a lighter and tried to take a drag off of each cigarette butt she found. All while I stared open mouthed. Keeping it classy, Seattle....
    cokemonster
    cokemonster
    I hope I don't give a shit as much as the cigarette fairy one day.


    Maybe without the lung cancer though...
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Right? Grudging respect for this woman...
    On today's episode of "My Shitty Office", Misogydouchehole has found a new target after my other coworker was forced to quit yesterday (long story). This girl is a) a supervisor and b) also in a long term relationship. I had to watch them flirting hardcore and I think I lost all hope in humanity.


    Bonus episode: guess which shitty coworker was an hour and a half late for her shift?
    CoyoteGhost
    CoyoteGhost
    I hope you feel better!
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Ha! So basically "The Office" on steroids. I feel it (:


    I actually had a glass of wine instead and that cheered me up immediately. So I'm good to go now.
    Kodiak
    Kodiak
    Wine works too! 
    I think it says a lot about me that I have more wine glasses than regular glasses...
    norway
    norway
    basically that you have great taste and hate life lol 
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Or that I'm a budding alcoholic haha!
    Today was some much needed twin time. <3 <3 I hate that we live so far away from each other and I'm so sad that in a few months we'll be living even farther apart...
    Talk about a delayed reaction. Went to my friend's for dinner three nights ago, spent some time talking outdoors until the mosquitos chased us indoors. Where my friend's bites swelled up instantly, mine didn't swell up until last night... two days later...
    On today's "My Shitty Office", my coworker sits down next to me at lunch and says to me "So... we kissed." When I ask her who, she then tells me how she's been seeing this other guy from work, her "work boyfriend", who I always address as Douche (short for misogidouchehole). Now, let me tell you why this is a problem. A) my female coworker is in a long-term, fairly serious relationship. B) Misogidouchehole is already "seeing" another girl in the office WHO IS MARRIED. This asshole tried hitting on me a few months after I started at this job but quickly realized he wasn't getting anywhere with me. I have then had to watch him flit from one taken girl to the next and screw over their relationships. I pity the girls stupid enough to fall for this asshole's tricks...


    Bonus: Guess which shitty coworker didn't show up for work today and didn't give any notice AGAIN?
    Phadia
    Phadia
    OMG, I'm sorry! I shouldn't be laughing, but I can relate to this sooo much!


    I hate work pervs. -_-'
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Apparently he also went to high school with my cousin and he kept asking me about her and I literally told him "You aren't getting anywhere near my cousin, Douche!"


    He kind of hates me now. Or at least avoids me. Probably because I call him douche to his face.
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Also, I'm really glad that other people can relate to my office drama! It makes me feel much less alone in the world (:
    Looking forward to when it's cold enough for mosquitos to go back to hell where they belong....
    Two more days til the new Lindsey Stirling CD comes out and I CANNOT CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT! Planning on going to the Target on my lunch break to pick up my copy on Friday, wheee!
    It's three in the afternoon on my day off and I still haven't washed my hair. Life is good?
    I don't even know you, but I'm following you cuz your statuses are so funny.
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Well, hi! My name is Malea and I'm exactly the opposite of funny but I'm glad someone thinks I'm amusing! (:
    kokonimo
    kokonimo
    Oh, no. D: Now I feel bad! Your life caveats are relatable, though, so I guess that's why I find them amusing, lol. (Caveat might not be the right word, but my English isn't working.) Best of luck, though! And I'm Tiara, nice to meet you, Malea! :D
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Hey, I feel that! The average person grind is equally ridiculous as anything else, haha! It's nice to meet you, too, Tiara!
    Today on "My Shitty Office", my coworker who "went on a week vacation" last minute last Friday was back today. She got "bored". But she wasn't just late, oh no. She showed up at 1:30, just after lunch, for a 9:00 shift. And then proceeded to talk to the supervisor for the next hour... only 38 more working days at this shitty office... 
    Malibu
    Malibu
    And, she took a break at 3:30 with the rest of us even though by Washington State Labor Laws SHE WASN'T OWED A BREAK.
    Alushey
    Alushey
    At least you only  a little over a month left at that place.
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Nah, I'm there until December when I move. I just have 38 more work days (I work there three days a week now and it'll drop down to two when classes start up again in September).
    I found it mildly disappointing that the only Pokemon spawned by the ocean were Staryu and Shellder.... THERE WAS A DRAGONAIR IN THE PUGET SOUND JUST LAST WEEK, POKEMON GO, WHY NOT BY THE OCEAN.
    When the house you're dogsitting at doesn't have air conditioning and the temperature hit a high of 90 degrees....
    TFW your university offers you more than $2000 necessary for your final quarter of tuition in grants and scholarships. Excuse me while I go sob with relief!!
    AnimusLight
    AnimusLight
    Congrats 


    DeveX_s-200x150.gif
    On the slightly less frustrating side of things, I got a "just-because" present from my love today. It's a beautiful mystic quartz ring because "I know how much you like rainbows, Lea." MY HEART, HELP.
    The things that go on at my work... I really should make a blog titled "My Shitty Office" and just detail all of the ridiculous shit that goes on at my work, because, really, you can't make this stuff up. "Today on 'My Shitty Office'..."
    When your coworker informs you that he's really attracted to your feet.... ummmmm......
    Hunnyhelp
    Hunnyhelp
    Seems like HR needs a call.........
    Malibu
    Malibu
    Eh, I only have to work there a few more months before I move. Plus, I told him right away that it was a really inappropriate comment and he thankfully looked horrified and embarrassed and apologized profusely and insisted that he didn't mean for it to be taken that way. So I'll let it slide this time.
    Tempted to take two weeks off of work and just go camping in the mountains. But then I'd miss opening ceremonies...
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