Voider
Professional of Nonsensical Tangents
Greetings! Myself being a Professional of Nonsensical Tangents, I found it prudent to organize my works, made with only the finest expertise. Thus, this is where I shall be cataloguing all of the Nonsensical Tangents that I have accumulatively written in #forumgames.
Written from boredom and random inspiration, reading them may make you laugh, cringe, or... uh... yeah, that's about it. I'm posting this anyway though, because I've written far too many to turn back now.
Anything in [brackets] is a note added after the fact, specifically for this thread, and is not a part of the original tangent.
Considering that it says "you're", it is implied that the person who reads the signature is the subject of the sentence. However, because many people have & will read that signature, this would imply that everyone who reads that signature is worth smiling for. Of course, the user with the signature could not possibly know who has & hasn't read their signature, meaning that it's literal meaning cannot be accomplished. Thus, the only conclusion is that the signature "YOU'RE THE ONLY THING WORTH SMILING FOR — ⋆✦°" is meant as a compliment or happy comment for anyone who sees it, rather than a literal & factual statement.
War is defined as "A state of open, armed, often prolonged conflict carried on between nations, states, or parties."; however, many people use the term "war" to describe conflicts on a more personal or individual scale. According to the definition of the word, this usage of it is incorrect. Or is it?
For example, if it is said that someone is "warring with themselves over a decision", this is obviously incorrect compared to the literal definition of "war"; based on what we know of such things. However, are we sure that the conflict of emotions & thoughts isn't truly an armed military conflict? Think about it; if you're torn over a decision & getting a headache, who's to say that the headache isn't being caused by munitions being exploded on a battlefield in your brain? If this is the case though, then what kinds of weapons would emotions or thoughts use? Would they all use the same weaponry, or would they all have differing designs like nations do? Who or what would act as the soldiers or commanders? Do wars inside minds end with a treaty being signed? Why am I writing this? Is there currently an armed military conflict being conducted within my mind to determine whether or not this actually gets posted because it's so utterly stupid?
The signature above says "the spoon stand that never was"; this implies that there is a spoon stand that does not exist. However, it is impossible to imply about an object that has never existed in the first place. If it never existed, it could not be known, nor could it be implied. However, if it has existed, that would allow the signature to be possible; in that case though, the signature is a falsity.
This is what's known as a paradox; if it has never existed in any way shape or form, then the signature cannot exist due to no knowledge of this supposed "spoon stand" existing, but if it does exist, then that makes the signature false.
Einstein said that the 4th dimension is time, however, this begs the question; if the 4th dimension is time, then are we living in a dimension where time doesn't exist? Is time simply a lie or delusion that humanity has created, because true time isn't in our 3 dimensional universe? Or perhaps the truth is that we are in the 4th dimension! Think about it; this makes so many anomalies make sense! Such as why I'm writing this nonsensical tangent based on absolutely no evidence!
Wait...
A cat tooth; why, you ask? Let me tell you.
From the limited context of the person-above-me's avatar, it can be concluded that it is a cat attempting to chew a spoon. It is also likely that it has, is, & continues to do so consistently & excessively. After a long period of time of this repeated process, it is most likely that one of the cat's teeth would break & fall out of it's mouth; metal is more durable than calcium after all. Loosing such a tooth might also cause major bloodloss, resulting in the cat's death in a similar timeframe to it's tooth dropping onto the floor.
Thus; I conclude that the "character above me" would drop a cat tooth upon death.
Cat; now I know this may seem like a confusing choice, but let me explain.
The avatar above me is obviously art of a creature using a watergun; the key to figuring out why I chose "cat" becomes apparent when we really look at the details. It has pointed ears, similar to those of a cat. It also has 4 lines, 2 on each side; these most likely represent whiskers. Of course, multiple creatures have both pointed ears & whiskers, so how does that narrow it down to a cat? This is because cats are the most iconic creature when humans think of pointed ears & whiskers; thus, I define the avatar above me with the word "cat".
Bonfire; why? I shall explain (in great & unnecessary detail).
A candle is an object made to sustain a flame; it is also one of the smallest objects designed to sustain a flame. The reason "bonfire" is the word I associate it with, is because of two reasons:
The signature above me states "Burning through dreams, one by one.". Of course, this is not physically possible, yet it does make sense. Let me explain...
Dreams cannot burn in the traditional sense; due to the fact that they do not exist physically, they cannot be harmed by a physical fire. The only possible conclusion is that the user above me means so in a metaphorical sense, not a literal one. The "burning" most likely refers to the destruction, or dissolution, of those dreams. Thus, while not physically possible, it is metaphorically possible for dreams to burn.
Theft of property, & destruction of property. Why that is, I shall now explain... please help me.
The avatar shows a cat chewing on a spoon. Now, this is most likely not the cat's spoon, as cats do not have any kind of civilization, let alone silverware. The most likely situation is that this cat has stolen a human's spoon; thus "theft of property". That explains the first charge, now onto the second. Due to the chewing, it can be concluded that the cat's teeth are most likely damaging the spoon, possibly to a point where it's either unusable or in bad condition. Thus, the charge for "destruction of property" can be garnered from the available evidence. I rest my case.
According to the name of this thread, I will be the victor once I post this. However, there seems to be a glaring flaw in the design of this game; it doesn't end. This has many consequences, namely that no one is truly the victor; this is because as soon as someone posts after you, your status as a victor is removed. I would suggest adding some kind of end condition or goal, since otherwise this thread is completely & utterly useless, as any attempt at victory will be met with inevitable failure. Regardless, I claim victory as of writing this, due to the -albeit flawed- rules of the game.
According to the thread owner's first post (henceforth referred to by "Firelie"), it can be surmised that Firelie does not want anyone to post in this thread. However, the thread is named "CLICK ON THIS THREAD!!!!"; the problem here lies in the fact that the more people click on this thread, the more likely it is for someone to post here. One hypothesis is that Firelie intended to use that name as reverse psychology; it would make sense, as a post named "Do not click on this thread" would likely attract more people than a post essentially saying "Do click on this thread". Of course, whatever name is used, it will always remain a fact that people will click on this thread.
Regardless; the only possible solution would be to have never posted it in the first place, but it can no longer be reversed. Even if Firelie were to delete the thread, there have already been multiple people who have posted, thus the request to not post has already been broken, & will always remain so.
"I'm having a good day" Why is this my conclusion? Allow me to explain...
The avatar above me is a cup, with a smiling face; unusual, but that's besides the point. The smile would indicate happiness, if we're still using the same standards as if this was a human face. Why is this cup happy? Well, seeing as it's a cup, normal parameters most likely do not apply. Perhaps someone drank all of the liquid, or perhaps it is currently full; unfortunately there is no context, so a more definite conclusion cannot be reached.
Nevertheless, it appears to be happy, thus, I designate the avatar above me with "I'm having a good day". Now, you may be asking, why did I specifically choose this, instead of simply "I'm happy"? This is because "I'm happy" sounds very plain, and would not be as interesting a conclusion; similar to how I wrote this entire thing, rather than just leaving a single, uninteresting sentence. If you're currently reading this, whoever you may be, then I assume that you agree, yes? Of course, because if you did not find this interesting or intriguing, you would not have read this far in the first place. Perhaps you enjoyed reading this, or perhaps you thought it was utterly stupid (because it is); but whatever the case, you have already read it, so I win.
From the title of this thread, it can be assumed that the creator of it (referred to as "owner" from henceforth) does not want you to click on it. There are also two spoilers titled "Don't click on this"; from this information, it can be assumed that the owner of those does not wish for anyone to click. However, as evidenced by the length and endings of each spoiler chain, the owner has put effort into making this. From this information, we can gleam that the owner created this for a specific purpose, that is, for someone to click on it. This may seem contradictory, however, as the name explicitly says not to. I believe, from the information that can be garnered, that "don't clik on this u human" is a joke, and that they do actually wish for people to click on it.
While it may seem odd, there are many people who make random things just for fun, and not for any practical reason. Quite similar to what you are reading right now, which is a nonsensical, utterly stupid, and worthless tangent born of boredom; that for some reason, you've just read. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to leave and attempt to disremember the image from the bad ending.
[Note: A helpful post soon after this, made by "Anakisuto", pointed out that it should be "glean", not "gleam". I still cannot fathom how I failed at such a basic piece of grammar, especially in one of these precisely made tangents; yet for cataloguing purposes, the mistake must unfortunately be left in.]
I am devastated that such a tragic loss has occurred today at 3:38PM (EST), when the streak of 1589 was broken. Though this is a heartbreaking moment, that I am sure many are saddened by, we must not give up hope for the thread. Perhaps the future will have us surpass what has been achieved, or perhaps not, but if we were to stop because of one obstacle, would not all of the effort put into this so far have been in vain? No, if we want this thread to count, these numbers to count, then we must continue onward!
[Note: The streak was not actually broken, as the ones who attempted to do so were not RPN moderators.]
By analyzing the image that is provided*, I believe that a solid conclusion can be made: metal poisoning. (*That is, the avatar above this post.)
The image shows a cat licking a spoon, which is odd, though considering it's a cat, not too surprising. If this cat were to lick the spoon so much and for so long, that the acid in the saliva were to disintegrate the spoon's molecules, then metal could possibly enter the cat's body. Of course, this could take literal years, but that insignificant factor is besides the point. After this has occurred for long enough, and a certain level of metal has entered the cat's body, it may then experience metal poisoning. This, in turn, would lead to death. There could be others hypotheses regarding how this cat has died, but I am confident that this is the most accurate and realistic of them all.
This invasion seems like quite the undertaking, but in it's conception, I do believe you have forgotten a crucial matter: foreign relations. It is possible that other nations, especially those bordering Denmark, could intervene against this effort. In such a case, the invasion would be put on the backfoot, or perhaps even repelled. When conducting operations against one nation, you must consider how that will affect all nations, and the diplomatic consequences of it. If you are not careful, then this invasion could rapidly escalate, which would not be in your favor. There is also the fact that your practices may appear... distasteful in the eyes of others, which will not be particularly beneficial in any diplomatic exchanges.
What you need, my friends, is an ambassador!
While the invasion is underway, the ambassador's job would be to keep any other powers from meddling in the affairs of the operation. Perhaps, if you are fortunate, they could even garner foreign support for your cause! Regardless, acquiring an ambassador would certainly be a wise decision, in order to stabilize any shaky relations and prevent a diplomatic catastrophe.
With my piece on the matter said, I shall now take my leave. I wish you a good day, and do hope that you take my advice into consideration.
Here, we can see people posting in their natural habitat, a thread named "LAST person to post is the winner!!!".
An acute observer will notice that recent posts bear no relation to claiming victory. This may confuse some of you listening, as it contradicts the purpose of this thread, but I assure you, there is a perfectly logical reason for this. Allow me to explain.
This thread, at my time of writing, has 2199 pages, and began in the year 2018; it has progressed quite a lot since then, and that, my friends, is the cause. "How", you ask? Simple. As time progresses, many things begin to deviate from their original purpose, whether for better or for worse. Using this thread as an example, we can deduce that as time progressed, the topic of conversation shifted in a different direction, leading to what we see now; it has shifted so drastically, that some may even find it incomprehensible.
Of course, there are always those who wish to keep the old way, so you will still occasionally see posts reflecting the thread's title. However, the thread as a whole has changed, leading to new ideas and advancements in the world of communication and understanding, as can be seen here.
I do hope that my analysis of this fascinating phenomenon, and these creatures in their wonderful habitat was enlightening. Do tune in next time for more of my nonsensical tangents!
Coming soon... maybe... perhaps... possibly... mayhap... perchance... conceivably...
Written from boredom and random inspiration, reading them may make you laugh, cringe, or... uh... yeah, that's about it. I'm posting this anyway though, because I've written far too many to turn back now.
Anything in [brackets] is a note added after the fact, specifically for this thread, and is not a part of the original tangent.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #1
Considering that it says "you're", it is implied that the person who reads the signature is the subject of the sentence. However, because many people have & will read that signature, this would imply that everyone who reads that signature is worth smiling for. Of course, the user with the signature could not possibly know who has & hasn't read their signature, meaning that it's literal meaning cannot be accomplished. Thus, the only conclusion is that the signature "YOU'RE THE ONLY THING WORTH SMILING FOR — ⋆✦°" is meant as a compliment or happy comment for anyone who sees it, rather than a literal & factual statement.Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #2
War is defined as "A state of open, armed, often prolonged conflict carried on between nations, states, or parties."; however, many people use the term "war" to describe conflicts on a more personal or individual scale. According to the definition of the word, this usage of it is incorrect. Or is it?For example, if it is said that someone is "warring with themselves over a decision", this is obviously incorrect compared to the literal definition of "war"; based on what we know of such things. However, are we sure that the conflict of emotions & thoughts isn't truly an armed military conflict? Think about it; if you're torn over a decision & getting a headache, who's to say that the headache isn't being caused by munitions being exploded on a battlefield in your brain? If this is the case though, then what kinds of weapons would emotions or thoughts use? Would they all use the same weaponry, or would they all have differing designs like nations do? Who or what would act as the soldiers or commanders? Do wars inside minds end with a treaty being signed? Why am I writing this? Is there currently an armed military conflict being conducted within my mind to determine whether or not this actually gets posted because it's so utterly stupid?
The Treaty of Posting Something Stupid
1. All armed conflict within the region known as "Voider's Brain" is to cease immediately.
2. All words above this will be posted in their absolute entirety for the world to cringe at.
3. The faction known as "Why are you writing this please stop" is to pay war reparations to the faction known as "This is a great idea shut up".
4. The faction known as "Why are you writing this please stop" is to be demilitarized to a fraction of 10% brainpower from 50% brainpower for approximately 1 minute.
Signed by:
Why are you writing this please stop.
This is a great idea shut up.
1. All armed conflict within the region known as "Voider's Brain" is to cease immediately.
2. All words above this will be posted in their absolute entirety for the world to cringe at.
3. The faction known as "Why are you writing this please stop" is to pay war reparations to the faction known as "This is a great idea shut up".
4. The faction known as "Why are you writing this please stop" is to be demilitarized to a fraction of 10% brainpower from 50% brainpower for approximately 1 minute.
Signed by:
Why are you writing this please stop.
This is a great idea shut up.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #3
The signature above says "the spoon stand that never was"; this implies that there is a spoon stand that does not exist. However, it is impossible to imply about an object that has never existed in the first place. If it never existed, it could not be known, nor could it be implied. However, if it has existed, that would allow the signature to be possible; in that case though, the signature is a falsity.This is what's known as a paradox; if it has never existed in any way shape or form, then the signature cannot exist due to no knowledge of this supposed "spoon stand" existing, but if it does exist, then that makes the signature false.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #4
Einstein said that the 4th dimension is time, however, this begs the question; if the 4th dimension is time, then are we living in a dimension where time doesn't exist? Is time simply a lie or delusion that humanity has created, because true time isn't in our 3 dimensional universe? Or perhaps the truth is that we are in the 4th dimension! Think about it; this makes so many anomalies make sense! Such as why I'm writing this nonsensical tangent based on absolutely no evidence!Wait...
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #5
A cat tooth; why, you ask? Let me tell you.From the limited context of the person-above-me's avatar, it can be concluded that it is a cat attempting to chew a spoon. It is also likely that it has, is, & continues to do so consistently & excessively. After a long period of time of this repeated process, it is most likely that one of the cat's teeth would break & fall out of it's mouth; metal is more durable than calcium after all. Loosing such a tooth might also cause major bloodloss, resulting in the cat's death in a similar timeframe to it's tooth dropping onto the floor.
Thus; I conclude that the "character above me" would drop a cat tooth upon death.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #6
Cat; now I know this may seem like a confusing choice, but let me explain.The avatar above me is obviously art of a creature using a watergun; the key to figuring out why I chose "cat" becomes apparent when we really look at the details. It has pointed ears, similar to those of a cat. It also has 4 lines, 2 on each side; these most likely represent whiskers. Of course, multiple creatures have both pointed ears & whiskers, so how does that narrow it down to a cat? This is because cats are the most iconic creature when humans think of pointed ears & whiskers; thus, I define the avatar above me with the word "cat".
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #7
Bonfire; why? I shall explain (in great & unnecessary detail).A candle is an object made to sustain a flame; it is also one of the smallest objects designed to sustain a flame. The reason "bonfire" is the word I associate it with, is because of two reasons:
- A bonfire is also an object designed to sustain a flame for a significant period of time.
- While a bonfire could be classified as the same as a candle in it's function, in a way it is the complete opposite. While a candle is a small object meant to sustain a small flame, a bonfire in a large object meant to sustain a significantly larger flame than that of a candle.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #8
The signature above me states "Burning through dreams, one by one.". Of course, this is not physically possible, yet it does make sense. Let me explain...Dreams cannot burn in the traditional sense; due to the fact that they do not exist physically, they cannot be harmed by a physical fire. The only possible conclusion is that the user above me means so in a metaphorical sense, not a literal one. The "burning" most likely refers to the destruction, or dissolution, of those dreams. Thus, while not physically possible, it is metaphorically possible for dreams to burn.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #9
Theft of property, & destruction of property. Why that is, I shall now explain... The avatar shows a cat chewing on a spoon. Now, this is most likely not the cat's spoon, as cats do not have any kind of civilization, let alone silverware. The most likely situation is that this cat has stolen a human's spoon; thus "theft of property". That explains the first charge, now onto the second. Due to the chewing, it can be concluded that the cat's teeth are most likely damaging the spoon, possibly to a point where it's either unusable or in bad condition. Thus, the charge for "destruction of property" can be garnered from the available evidence. I rest my case.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #10
According to the name of this thread, I will be the victor once I post this. However, there seems to be a glaring flaw in the design of this game; it doesn't end. This has many consequences, namely that no one is truly the victor; this is because as soon as someone posts after you, your status as a victor is removed. I would suggest adding some kind of end condition or goal, since otherwise this thread is completely & utterly useless, as any attempt at victory will be met with inevitable failure. Regardless, I claim victory as of writing this, due to the -albeit flawed- rules of the game.Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #11
According to the thread owner's first post (henceforth referred to by "Firelie"), it can be surmised that Firelie does not want anyone to post in this thread. However, the thread is named "CLICK ON THIS THREAD!!!!"; the problem here lies in the fact that the more people click on this thread, the more likely it is for someone to post here. One hypothesis is that Firelie intended to use that name as reverse psychology; it would make sense, as a post named "Do not click on this thread" would likely attract more people than a post essentially saying "Do click on this thread". Of course, whatever name is used, it will always remain a fact that people will click on this thread.Regardless; the only possible solution would be to have never posted it in the first place, but it can no longer be reversed. Even if Firelie were to delete the thread, there have already been multiple people who have posted, thus the request to not post has already been broken, & will always remain so.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #12
"I'm having a good day" Why is this my conclusion? Allow me to explain...The avatar above me is a cup, with a smiling face; unusual, but that's besides the point. The smile would indicate happiness, if we're still using the same standards as if this was a human face. Why is this cup happy? Well, seeing as it's a cup, normal parameters most likely do not apply. Perhaps someone drank all of the liquid, or perhaps it is currently full; unfortunately there is no context, so a more definite conclusion cannot be reached.
Nevertheless, it appears to be happy, thus, I designate the avatar above me with "I'm having a good day". Now, you may be asking, why did I specifically choose this, instead of simply "I'm happy"? This is because "I'm happy" sounds very plain, and would not be as interesting a conclusion; similar to how I wrote this entire thing, rather than just leaving a single, uninteresting sentence. If you're currently reading this, whoever you may be, then I assume that you agree, yes? Of course, because if you did not find this interesting or intriguing, you would not have read this far in the first place. Perhaps you enjoyed reading this, or perhaps you thought it was utterly stupid (because it is); but whatever the case, you have already read it, so I win.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #13
From the title of this thread, it can be assumed that the creator of it (referred to as "owner" from henceforth) does not want you to click on it. There are also two spoilers titled "Don't click on this"; from this information, it can be assumed that the owner of those does not wish for anyone to click. However, as evidenced by the length and endings of each spoiler chain, the owner has put effort into making this. From this information, we can gleam that the owner created this for a specific purpose, that is, for someone to click on it. This may seem contradictory, however, as the name explicitly says not to. I believe, from the information that can be garnered, that "don't clik on this u human" is a joke, and that they do actually wish for people to click on it.While it may seem odd, there are many people who make random things just for fun, and not for any practical reason. Quite similar to what you are reading right now, which is a nonsensical, utterly stupid, and worthless tangent born of boredom; that for some reason, you've just read. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to leave and attempt to disremember the image from the bad ending.
[Note: A helpful post soon after this, made by "Anakisuto", pointed out that it should be "glean", not "gleam". I still cannot fathom how I failed at such a basic piece of grammar, especially in one of these precisely made tangents; yet for cataloguing purposes, the mistake must unfortunately be left in.]
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #14
I am devastated that such a tragic loss has occurred today at 3:38PM (EST), when the streak of 1589 was broken. Though this is a heartbreaking moment, that I am sure many are saddened by, we must not give up hope for the thread. Perhaps the future will have us surpass what has been achieved, or perhaps not, but if we were to stop because of one obstacle, would not all of the effort put into this so far have been in vain? No, if we want this thread to count, these numbers to count, then we must continue onward![Note: The streak was not actually broken, as the ones who attempted to do so were not RPN moderators.]
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #15
By analyzing the image that is provided*, I believe that a solid conclusion can be made: metal poisoning. (*That is, the avatar above this post.)The image shows a cat licking a spoon, which is odd, though considering it's a cat, not too surprising. If this cat were to lick the spoon so much and for so long, that the acid in the saliva were to disintegrate the spoon's molecules, then metal could possibly enter the cat's body. Of course, this could take literal years, but that insignificant factor is besides the point. After this has occurred for long enough, and a certain level of metal has entered the cat's body, it may then experience metal poisoning. This, in turn, would lead to death. There could be others hypotheses regarding how this cat has died, but I am confident that this is the most accurate and realistic of them all.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #16
This invasion seems like quite the undertaking, but in it's conception, I do believe you have forgotten a crucial matter: foreign relations. It is possible that other nations, especially those bordering Denmark, could intervene against this effort. In such a case, the invasion would be put on the backfoot, or perhaps even repelled. When conducting operations against one nation, you must consider how that will affect all nations, and the diplomatic consequences of it. If you are not careful, then this invasion could rapidly escalate, which would not be in your favor. There is also the fact that your practices may appear... distasteful in the eyes of others, which will not be particularly beneficial in any diplomatic exchanges.What you need, my friends, is an ambassador!
While the invasion is underway, the ambassador's job would be to keep any other powers from meddling in the affairs of the operation. Perhaps, if you are fortunate, they could even garner foreign support for your cause! Regardless, acquiring an ambassador would certainly be a wise decision, in order to stabilize any shaky relations and prevent a diplomatic catastrophe.
With my piece on the matter said, I shall now take my leave. I wish you a good day, and do hope that you take my advice into consideration.
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #17
Here, we can see people posting in their natural habitat, a thread named "LAST person to post is the winner!!!".An acute observer will notice that recent posts bear no relation to claiming victory. This may confuse some of you listening, as it contradicts the purpose of this thread, but I assure you, there is a perfectly logical reason for this. Allow me to explain.
This thread, at my time of writing, has 2199 pages, and began in the year 2018; it has progressed quite a lot since then, and that, my friends, is the cause. "How", you ask? Simple. As time progresses, many things begin to deviate from their original purpose, whether for better or for worse. Using this thread as an example, we can deduce that as time progressed, the topic of conversation shifted in a different direction, leading to what we see now; it has shifted so drastically, that some may even find it incomprehensible.
Of course, there are always those who wish to keep the old way, so you will still occasionally see posts reflecting the thread's title. However, the thread as a whole has changed, leading to new ideas and advancements in the world of communication and understanding, as can be seen here.
I do hope that my analysis of this fascinating phenomenon, and these creatures in their wonderful habitat was enlightening. Do tune in next time for more of my nonsensical tangents!
Voider's Nonsensical Tangent #18
Coming soon... maybe... perhaps... possibly... mayhap... perchance... conceivably...
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