ArchieTheFel
Born to ":3", forced to "Hi, welcome to the store"
So, this is basically... is going to be a fun little series where I make fun of shows, games, movies, books, etc. by just summarizing them, but in a silly, goofy way because I'm such a silly, goofy person. If you want to see anything else, feel free to request anything.
Olivia Uncommonlastname is a normal person who works a normal job. One day, she was just going about her usual business at her job and doing job stuff, when a goofy alien came into her work and slaughtered half of her coworkers. Suddenly, a conventionally attractive man jumps out from behind a pillar--it's the Doctor!
"I'm the Doctor!" he says, and flashes his sonic screwdriver at the alien. The alien falls to the floor crying and runs away, pathetically. Olivia, emotionally unphased by the death of her coworkers/friends, is instantly attracted to the Doctor.
"Doctor who?" she asks.
*cue title sequence*
The next day Olivia goes about her business again until the Doctor comes out of nowhere and starts getting into her business.
"What are you doing in my business?" Olivia asks, annoyed but also slightly flustered.
"Goofy, silly stuff." The Doctor responds. Suddenly, Olivia's boyfriend, Samuel McCuck, comes out of the living room with a fully cooked breakfast, love letters, emotional availability, and a small box in his hands.
"Olivia," Sam starts, "I love you and respect you so much. I would never look at another woman. You're literally the only person who brings any true meaning to my life. Will you do me the honor of marrying me?" Olivia punches Sam in the stomach and he falls to the floor. She turns back to the Doctor and flutters her eyelashes.
"Wow, you're so brilliant, Doctor!" She said, butt-kissing happily. Sam simply smiled and nods.
"That's okay, Olivia," he wheezes, still trying to get over the gut-punch. "You're worth waiting for." The Doctor and Olivia leave Sam on the floor and go into the TARDIS. Olivia's jaw drops all the way down to the floor. The Doctor bends down and picks her jaw back up, thoroughly disturbed.
"IT'S BIGGER ON THE INSIDE???" Olivia screams, smashing the TARDIS console in excitement. The Doctor rolls his eyes; he's very used to this response. He presses a random combination of buttons and then the pair lands in some random part of England, because aliens love visiting England. Also, it's in London. Aliens love London. The Doctor and Olivia step out of the TARDIS to see the aliens about to throw eggs and toilet paper on Buckingham Palace. The Queen is shaking her fist angrily at the aliens, but the guards are helpless as their lovely, fluffy hats have gotten covered in egg and acidic alien slime, causing them to die horrifically.
The Doctor walks in front of the aliens, attempting to reason with them.
"Don't throw eggs and toilet paper. You'll regret it in the future, just like I regret killing my entire planet. I have so much trauma, but I've learned to live with it. I may contradict myself a lot, but I'm so traumatized. Don't traumatize yourselves. Killing is bad. And also throwing eggs and toilet paper, just rude."
The aliens realize the Doctor is right, but they're also scared of him. They all leave screaming, but now they're a little more mature, thanks to the Doctor.
Olivia walks up to the Doctor and stands next to him. She stares up at him with big, glistening eyes.
"I didn't know you were so traumatized Doctor." She says, sadly. The Doctor shrugs.
"Eh, whatever. Let's go space-time travel!" Olivia and the Doctor go into the TARDIS, and more shenanigans ensue.
The End!
"I'm the Doctor!" he says, and flashes his sonic screwdriver at the alien. The alien falls to the floor crying and runs away, pathetically. Olivia, emotionally unphased by the death of her coworkers/friends, is instantly attracted to the Doctor.
"Doctor who?" she asks.
*cue title sequence*
The next day Olivia goes about her business again until the Doctor comes out of nowhere and starts getting into her business.
"What are you doing in my business?" Olivia asks, annoyed but also slightly flustered.
"Goofy, silly stuff." The Doctor responds. Suddenly, Olivia's boyfriend, Samuel McCuck, comes out of the living room with a fully cooked breakfast, love letters, emotional availability, and a small box in his hands.
"Olivia," Sam starts, "I love you and respect you so much. I would never look at another woman. You're literally the only person who brings any true meaning to my life. Will you do me the honor of marrying me?" Olivia punches Sam in the stomach and he falls to the floor. She turns back to the Doctor and flutters her eyelashes.
"Wow, you're so brilliant, Doctor!" She said, butt-kissing happily. Sam simply smiled and nods.
"That's okay, Olivia," he wheezes, still trying to get over the gut-punch. "You're worth waiting for." The Doctor and Olivia leave Sam on the floor and go into the TARDIS. Olivia's jaw drops all the way down to the floor. The Doctor bends down and picks her jaw back up, thoroughly disturbed.
"IT'S BIGGER ON THE INSIDE???" Olivia screams, smashing the TARDIS console in excitement. The Doctor rolls his eyes; he's very used to this response. He presses a random combination of buttons and then the pair lands in some random part of England, because aliens love visiting England. Also, it's in London. Aliens love London. The Doctor and Olivia step out of the TARDIS to see the aliens about to throw eggs and toilet paper on Buckingham Palace. The Queen is shaking her fist angrily at the aliens, but the guards are helpless as their lovely, fluffy hats have gotten covered in egg and acidic alien slime, causing them to die horrifically.
The Doctor walks in front of the aliens, attempting to reason with them.
"Don't throw eggs and toilet paper. You'll regret it in the future, just like I regret killing my entire planet. I have so much trauma, but I've learned to live with it. I may contradict myself a lot, but I'm so traumatized. Don't traumatize yourselves. Killing is bad. And also throwing eggs and toilet paper, just rude."
The aliens realize the Doctor is right, but they're also scared of him. They all leave screaming, but now they're a little more mature, thanks to the Doctor.
Olivia walks up to the Doctor and stands next to him. She stares up at him with big, glistening eyes.
"I didn't know you were so traumatized Doctor." She says, sadly. The Doctor shrugs.
"Eh, whatever. Let's go space-time travel!" Olivia and the Doctor go into the TARDIS, and more shenanigans ensue.
The End!
