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  1. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    Or maybe I think to much.
  2. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    I take that last sentence back. I think I need to establish him as a special, magical kind of fox. I mean, no brainer, right? But maybe I ought to find something for him to refer to his kind by, even just something colloquial.
  3. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    Still working on the second draft. Should be done in about three days. Btw, Grey is supposed to be a Kitsune from Japanese myth (or my interpretation of it, anyway) , but since most readers would expect a Kitsune to be a little more godly- or to at least take a human form- I sense it best to...
  4. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    Thank you ^_^ . I shall see that you get chance very soon this week, madam or monsieur.
  5. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    I wish I could like that more! Greycoat Is actually old favorite character of mine. Like literally, "old". I usually have him as a 923 year old, powerful, Gandalf the Grey sort of character (considerably younger right here) but I figured the audience wouldn't care about that for this scene...
  6. MrMopp

    Story Of Fate, Foxes and Foot Traps (critique welcome!)

    Greycoat was out hunting in the woods. He was hunkered down low in the ferns, ready to pounce on an unsuspecting squirrel, when something launched out of the nearby bushes and bounced around In the air like a rubber ball in a glass cup. With the squirrel scared off, Grey cursed his luck and...
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