A.I.S.H.A.
Artificial Integrated Social Human Algorithm
“To Whomever, from Wherever,
Let me begin this letter by telling you that you may or may not exist. I cannot confirm whether or not you do, but if I didn’t have my suspicions I wouldn’t be writing this. I won’t identify myself for reasons that pertain to my current circumstances but I suppose if you will be visiting us here in small town, nowhere, Oregon, USA it would be worth telling you that names are very valuable here especially if you’re going to be dealing with Otherworldlings. Who are these otherworldlings you ask? Husks, Hollows, Crowfolk, and Mooneaters. From Kindlings to Wisps, from Ley leeches to Seerlings. Just a few among the kinds of creatures that lurk deep in our neck of the woods. Some are creatures that’ll help you out of the nature of their good will, others who will do it for a price, and even a few who don’t play nice. But if we’re going to be honest, more often than not, they don’t play nice. They’ll come from Heaven, Hell, and neither are what you’re told they are and if you think those are the only realms you can travel to and from, you’d be sorely mistaken. Faerie land, the In Between, and the Mirror World all accompany your conventional yet... shall I say, narrow minded world view. Consider yourself enlightened. Each realm comes with its own charms and delights, and rules to follow if you hope to make it back to your lovely little Earth in one piece. As for the rest, you’ll have to figure out for yourself. Now I do have some matter to attend to, so I’ll bid you farewell, for now that is. If you do decide to visit, I hope you enjoy your stay and do stop by my estate. It gets rather lonely and it’s worth noting, I’m a bit meaner in person. I’m, shall I say, more delightfully expressive in my writing but when you’re in the company that I happen to live in, life demands a level of discernment. Until then, stay away from trouble. Heaven knows there’s a lot. They may even cause some of it.
Yours Truly,
~~ ••• ~~”
ATTENTION ALL PROSPECTIVE RECRUITS (BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY THEIR PARENTS):
Does your child run into trouble often? Whether it be with the police, school, or God knows whatever other vile acts of delinquency they’ve gotten mixed up in? CAMP PROPER was established for the express purpose of correcting these problems over one summer of discipline and instruction. My name is Sargent Marlowe and I have served our proud country for twenty years. As a former drill sargent, I know everything there is to know about getting unruly kids in line so they can be the upstanding citizens this country demands them to be. Together with my assistant, Eugene Stanley Finnings, you can guarantee your rebellious son or daughter will be over that phase by the time they return home in August.
CAMP PROPER is a seven week program that runs from June 22nd to August 10th. We have complete and fully functional utilities including housing, air conditioning, showers, bathrooms, electricity and hot water. Don’t be fooled in thinking such luxury will hinder their disciplinary learning. They will be busy from dawn to dusk with a 9 o clock curfew. They will eat three balanced meals a day and will learn values like teamwork, order, and righteousness. For $165, the full program will be at your disposal. Call 1-800-PROPER for more information.
HEY EVERYONE! This is just an idea I had that came with a spark of creativity. So that I’m sure your expectations aren’t disappointed, basically, you’ll be a camper at CAMP PROPER, in for one reason or another, whether it be because you got in trouble for all sorts of misdemeanors, or because your parents think you need to “get out more.” Any and all social outcasts welcome. There will be witches, cultists, vampires, and werewolves, all things you can become but you won’t be starting out as. You know, the conventional American mythological creatures, of course, with their own twist. And then of course, there’s the new stuff I added to the cannon, which you’ll discover for yourself. Needless to say, all is not as it seems in the forests of Littleton, Oregon. If you have any questions, feel free to ask! For now, though, I’ll add some of the art that inspired this story
Let me begin this letter by telling you that you may or may not exist. I cannot confirm whether or not you do, but if I didn’t have my suspicions I wouldn’t be writing this. I won’t identify myself for reasons that pertain to my current circumstances but I suppose if you will be visiting us here in small town, nowhere, Oregon, USA it would be worth telling you that names are very valuable here especially if you’re going to be dealing with Otherworldlings. Who are these otherworldlings you ask? Husks, Hollows, Crowfolk, and Mooneaters. From Kindlings to Wisps, from Ley leeches to Seerlings. Just a few among the kinds of creatures that lurk deep in our neck of the woods. Some are creatures that’ll help you out of the nature of their good will, others who will do it for a price, and even a few who don’t play nice. But if we’re going to be honest, more often than not, they don’t play nice. They’ll come from Heaven, Hell, and neither are what you’re told they are and if you think those are the only realms you can travel to and from, you’d be sorely mistaken. Faerie land, the In Between, and the Mirror World all accompany your conventional yet... shall I say, narrow minded world view. Consider yourself enlightened. Each realm comes with its own charms and delights, and rules to follow if you hope to make it back to your lovely little Earth in one piece. As for the rest, you’ll have to figure out for yourself. Now I do have some matter to attend to, so I’ll bid you farewell, for now that is. If you do decide to visit, I hope you enjoy your stay and do stop by my estate. It gets rather lonely and it’s worth noting, I’m a bit meaner in person. I’m, shall I say, more delightfully expressive in my writing but when you’re in the company that I happen to live in, life demands a level of discernment. Until then, stay away from trouble. Heaven knows there’s a lot. They may even cause some of it.
Yours Truly,
~~ ••• ~~”
ATTENTION ALL PROSPECTIVE RECRUITS (BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY THEIR PARENTS):
Does your child run into trouble often? Whether it be with the police, school, or God knows whatever other vile acts of delinquency they’ve gotten mixed up in? CAMP PROPER was established for the express purpose of correcting these problems over one summer of discipline and instruction. My name is Sargent Marlowe and I have served our proud country for twenty years. As a former drill sargent, I know everything there is to know about getting unruly kids in line so they can be the upstanding citizens this country demands them to be. Together with my assistant, Eugene Stanley Finnings, you can guarantee your rebellious son or daughter will be over that phase by the time they return home in August.
CAMP PROPER is a seven week program that runs from June 22nd to August 10th. We have complete and fully functional utilities including housing, air conditioning, showers, bathrooms, electricity and hot water. Don’t be fooled in thinking such luxury will hinder their disciplinary learning. They will be busy from dawn to dusk with a 9 o clock curfew. They will eat three balanced meals a day and will learn values like teamwork, order, and righteousness. For $165, the full program will be at your disposal. Call 1-800-PROPER for more information.
HEY EVERYONE! This is just an idea I had that came with a spark of creativity. So that I’m sure your expectations aren’t disappointed, basically, you’ll be a camper at CAMP PROPER, in for one reason or another, whether it be because you got in trouble for all sorts of misdemeanors, or because your parents think you need to “get out more.” Any and all social outcasts welcome. There will be witches, cultists, vampires, and werewolves, all things you can become but you won’t be starting out as. You know, the conventional American mythological creatures, of course, with their own twist. And then of course, there’s the new stuff I added to the cannon, which you’ll discover for yourself. Needless to say, all is not as it seems in the forests of Littleton, Oregon. If you have any questions, feel free to ask! For now, though, I’ll add some of the art that inspired this story
