Other The Dark Humor Thread

[Axel The Englishman]

What’s a good way to surprise bae in bed at night?

A pillow and some pressure.

 

[Winter_]

"I'm sorry," and "my bad!" mean the same thing.

Unless you're at a funeral...

 

[Sir Swigglesworth]

Dark humor is just like food in North Korea, not everyone gets it.

 

[The_Omega_Effect]

What's the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person? You have to drop the bomb twice for them to get the message.

 

[myfanwy]

after work, i volunteer to help blind children

verb, not adjective

 

[Winter_]

What's the difference between a trunk full of bowling balls and a trunk full of dead babies?

You can't unload bowling balls with a pitchfork.

 

[The Omen of Death]

The executioner asks a convicted murderer at the electric chair about to be put to death, "Do you have any last requests?”

"Yes," replies the murderer. "Can you please hold my hand?"

 

[adrian_]

It's a little known fact that OJ Simpson practiced boxing, he used his wife as a punching bag.

 

[LennyTheMemeGod]

It's a little known fact that OJ Simpson practiced boxing, he used his wife as a punching bag.

Jesus

 

[adrian_]

Jesus

Quite literally, for her.

 

[LennyTheMemeGod]

Quite literally, for her.

Holy fuck

 

[adrian_]

Holy fuck

Holy indeed.

 

[The Hero]

They say all brain dead people are vegeatarians because hey, you are what you eat.

 

[Sir Swigglesworth]

The sound of a baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds in the world, unless you're home alone and don't have a child.

 

[Archdemon]

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he was hit by a bus.


Knock knock
Who's there?
Dave
Dave who?
Dave proceeded to break into tears as his grandma's Alzheimer's has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

 

[Winter_Wolf]

I just came back from a visit to the battered women's shelter, and it feels pretty good to have gone. My arms hurt now though.

(Heard that one awhile back--and disclaimer I'm not promoting such a thing obviously)

 

[Rock And Roll Boy]

Son, you want a lollipop with a little cream? Do one favour for dad.

Take this knife and kill Mum. You'll already find her... weakened and bruised.

*Son kills his Mum as Dad masturbated furiously*

The Son then gets his lollipop as he sucked his Dad off and gets blasted with fresh, warm cum all over his face.

 

[Axel The Englishman]

R Rock And Roll Boy

 

[Rock And Roll Boy]

R Rock And Roll Boy

View attachment 407261

What?!

 

[The Omen of Death]

What?!

I have to admit, and this is probably what Axel The Englishman thinks as well. That that most recent post you made was kinda tasteless, not to discourage your attempt though! It's just that it just didn't sit right even by black humor standards. It felt gratuitous. And in the end it kinda didn't feel like a joke.

Again don't let it discourage you from posting anything you come up with, just consider if it feels like too much.

 

[The Omen of Death]

The doctor gave me one year to live. So in the heat of the moment, I shot him. And the judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

 

[Rock And Roll Boy]

I have to admit, and this is probably what Axel The Englishman thinks as well. That that most recent post you made was kinda tasteless, not to discourage your attempt though! It's just that it just didn't sit right even by black humor standards. It felt gratuitous. And in the end it kinda didn't feel like a joke.

Again don't let it discourage you from posting anything you come up with, just consider if it feels like too much.

Well this is the Dark Humour thread. There is no line when it comes to dark humour.

 

[Axel The Englishman]

R Rock And Roll Boy

Yeah... but that wasn’t really a joke. There wasn’t really any humorous outcome.

 

[Blush]

what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat
-The wheelchair

What's green, fuzzy, and if you eat it you will probably die
-A moldy dead baby

 

[The Omen of Death]

Well this is the Dark Humour thread. There is no line when it comes to dark humour.

Yeah but you have to make sure it's something that can actually be laughed at, even black humor stops at a certain point because you tread such a thin line when you make them. Just take notes from others who have posted and then give it another shot.