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Fantasy Setting Summer Dawn - OOC

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..A lot of information there all at once, but I think I got it! Do I just sort of throw my character into the mix, or will something happen that will be my cue of sorts?
 
s u n s u n , thanks for the application, but I have a few concerns about how this character will fit into the world and the plot.
The story will move into Sumenna, and your character is very likely wanted for murder, especially if she killed someone in house Evereach. This will not work with the plot I have designed. I think having a character with such a limited emotional range and that/those backstory/goals is going to make it very difficult to find reasons for your character to mesh with/stay with our group. On those grounds I will have to refuse her.
 
hwayi hwayi Great character!

I'd like you to think up a little more for the personality as you write her. Its a bit short.
Otheriwse, the only thing I should mention is that slavery is not a thing in Cyndara, people aren't sold, but in Sumenna, that is an acceptable thing, so if you could tweak her backstory to match that bit of lore.

Otherwise, she's accepted.
 
I think that the concept of 'slavery' is just in her mind and she doesn't know what it actually was, but I'll gladly change those points! ^
 
I think that the concept of 'slavery' is just in her mind and she doesn't know what it actually was, but I'll gladly change those points! ^
I'll be posting the time skip and I'll detail the area really well and place my characters. The description of Delan is in the lore and I believe the update section is up to date XD If you have any questions after my next post just put them here.
 
Gotcha, thanks for the assistance! I updated my character and will be sure to ask...stuff? ^
 
Gotcha, thanks for the assistance! I updated my character and will be sure to ask...stuff? ^
One unique thing your character might be ablt to engage with in the future: She seems very devoted to praying, the god and goddess in this story are quite connected to their people, oftentimes, they answer.
 
LazyDaze LazyDaze So I've had a read through your CS, and I will need some changes.

Overall your character is over-powered, you need to pick either a mastery of magic or a mastery of physical combat.
You need to re-think your weaknesses, because in actual combat, they will not inhibit your character's ability to fight or function. This is what I really wanted when I asked for weaknesses, something that an opponent could exploit. I need at least one physical short-coming. Your character cannot be perfect.

The next thing that won't fit is your character's general personality. I cannot think of a reason why this character would want to follow a band of people around the world doing whatever. You character's goals don't align well and his personality won't make him readily accepted by the other characters. He's going to have to play at being nice, or have at least one redeeming personality trait that makes him likable at least a fraction of the time.

The personality section is also too short. I called for 3 paragraphs, yours is barely two. The other recent profiles have only been accepted because they will be adding to them.

Please make these changes and let me know when you finish, I'll review it again.
 
SilverFlight SilverFlight Okay, I made a lot of changes. Removed the light magic, and removed the whole god complex part of his bio. Admittedly that wouldn't fit with the party, was just going for somethin eccentric. Gave him more redeeming qualities, and added a few more weaknesses and non offensive skills. Overall I think he has turned out a lot more pleasant than his previous version. LOL. Also reduced age a bit (113 to 88), reduced height 2 inches.

When it comes to personality I added more to it but I'm pretty sure the character sheet states two paragraphs, and other bios seem to reach that limit. Unless it was changed. (I know the Biography portion calls for 3.) Either way, I think I made the 3 paragraph limit. Had to make edits on my phone since I'm out so I hope I didn't miss anything. (I might go back and bold the changes.)
 
SilverFlight SilverFlight Okay, I made a lot of changes. Removed the light magic, and removed the whole god complex part of his bio. Admittedly that wouldn't fit with the party, was just going for somethin eccentric. Gave him more redeeming qualities, and added a few more weaknesses and non offensive skills. Overall I think he has turned out a lot more pleasant than his previous version. LOL. Also reduced age a bit (113 to 88), reduced height 2 inches.

When it comes to personality I added more to it but I'm pretty sure the character sheet states two paragraphs, and other bios seem to reach that limit. Unless it was changed. (I know the Biography portion calls for 3.) Either way, I think I made the 3 paragraph limit. Had to make edits on my phone since I'm out so I hope I didn't miss anything. (I might go back and bold the changes.)
Thanks very much for being so accommodating, I haven't had time to look yet but I will as soon as I can. No need to bold the changes XD.
 
SilverFlight SilverFlight Okay, I made a lot of changes. Removed the light magic, and removed the whole god complex part of his bio. Admittedly that wouldn't fit with the party, was just going for somethin eccentric. Gave him more redeeming qualities, and added a few more weaknesses and non offensive skills. Overall I think he has turned out a lot more pleasant than his previous version. LOL. Also reduced age a bit (113 to 88), reduced height 2 inches.

When it comes to personality I added more to it but I'm pretty sure the character sheet states two paragraphs, and other bios seem to reach that limit. Unless it was changed. (I know the Biography portion calls for 3.) Either way, I think I made the 3 paragraph limit. Had to make edits on my phone since I'm out so I hope I didn't miss anything. (I might go back and bold the changes.)
Much Improved! Now this is a character who will really be able to grow! Accepted. Very well done. I'll get you the discord invite and help get you up to speed. There is an updates section and the second to last post I made is long but it summarizes everything that has happened so far. If I'm not around the rest of the crew will be more than happy to help.

Welcome to Summer Dawn.

Setting Summer Dawn
 
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Much Improved! Now this is a character who will really be able to grow! Accepted. Very well done. I'll get you the discord invite and help get you up to speed. There is an updates section and the second to last post I made is long but it summarizes everything that has happened so far. If I'm not around the rest of the crew will be more than happy to help.

Welcome to Summer Dawn.

Setting Summer Dawn
Thanks, I can tell you guys put a lot of effort into this. Just happy to be apart of it! ^^

LazyDaze LazyDaze Welcome welcome!!
Thanks for the warm welcome!
 
Update
Ok, just a quick note: You'll notice I've employed the threadmark system (finally) which puts larger tabs for all the pages at the top of everything.
I have also added an extra page for character interactions to happen at a slower/faster pace than the main thread. It's called 'Firelight Tales'. This allows for good devo for people who want to post more, or can't post as much as they'd like. Have a go at it, you can collab and put it up in one post, or you can back and forth banter, don't forget to use the special ID tag system I explain on the top of that page.
Yatasal Yatasal LazyDaze LazyDaze Mythee Mythee Nevina Nevina Flutterby Flutterby Zazz Zazz deer deer mothspit mothspit hwayi hwayi
 
Yatasal Yatasal LazyDaze LazyDaze Mythee Mythee Nevina Nevina Flutterby Flutterby Zazz Zazz deer deer mothspit mothspit hwayi hwayi

We haven't done a character challenge in a while!
For the new members, a character challenge is when I give you an exercise to help build and define your character.
This one's called Influence collage! You job is to gather together a bunch of images that either outline characters or things that have influenced the making of yours, or things that you would like to incorporate. There can be as many as you like, but I'd say a good number would be between 5 and 10.
Give a little bit of an explanation for each image, who/what it is and why its relevant to your character.
Ready? GO!
 

IOLAS ORIXALIM
#CHARACTER CHALLENGE
collage background 2.jpg

Image 1-Top Left (Guy with the blue suit)-Jade Curtis from Tales of the Abyss.
One of my favorite characters of all time. He was the oldest member in the party and often would be relied upon. Calm, intelligent, and very witty/sarcastic, it was always tough to tell what he was thinking. He was practical and sometimes cruel. I drew a lot from this character, Iolas is probably modeled after him the most. Great character from a great series if you have never heard of it.

Image 2-Far left (Quote)-Pretty obvious here. Iolas has yet to forgive himself and forget the past despite his inner self always telling him it is time to move on

Image 3-bottom left-Vash from Trigun
-Vash always acts pretty simplistic and even stupid at times, but he often does this to hide his true pain much like Iolas. One of the things I took directly from the character is his unwillingness to kill his enemies. He tries to keep everyone alive no matter how dire the situation. Sometimes it is very irrational, but I admired it nonetheless and added it as a part of Iolas's character.

Image 4 Bottom Middle-Gray Rainbow-I felt this displayed the inner turmoil within Iolas. He is troubled by his past despite the fact that his current self strives and hopes for peace. He is trying to hold on to a rainbow in the middle of an emotional storm. Waiting to see if the storm ends, leaving only the rainbow in a blue sky.

Image 5 Bottom Right-Cheshire Cat from Alice and Wonderland-The Chershire Cat can be a bonafide A-hole. I loved his round about way of talking, and how he seemed detached from any touble that was befalling those around him. His unpredictability was intriguing, so I did draw a bit from this character. You have to love him.

Image 6 Far right, the White Witch from Narnia-You're probably thinking, wtf. LOL, well when I was thinking of Iolas as a soldier a few people came to mind and she was one of them. When I thought about his fighting style, I remember the white witch fighting in the war. The way she handled her blades was graceful, yet powerful. I thought it was beautiful. You could say she is the embodiment of past Iolas. (Dual wield is badass)

Image 7 Top right, Legolas from Lord of the Rings-Come on now...who makes an elf and doesn't think about him. Most tropes and even the basic framework of Iolas derived from Legolas. His soft manner of speaking, his strength and bravery. Even their names are similar. Favorite Lord of the Rings character btw.

Image 8 Top middle, Split sky-This represents a few things. First the idea that Iolas has lived as two different people. A demonic monster, and now a self appointed guardian angel of the world. Second it is representative of how he walks the path in the middle worshipping light and darkness. Striving to fully understand both.

Image 9 Center-Heart in ice-I placed his heart in the center on purpose, but this displays his inner self without the saracasm, the smile, and armor. After tragedy befell and his eyes opened to a reality that he thought was a nightmare, he had hardened his heart. It is frozen, in the past. Unable to truly feel, unable to truly love. He is scared to embrace such warm emotions for fear that he will just destroy them as he had did in the past. It is a wonder if anyone will be able to melt the ice around his heart. His heart not broken, not gone, but frozen. It's still there waiting to beat again.
 

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