Oc Criteria..?

[Pastry]

So I have started role - playing a long while ago, and it would be nice to have some sort of criticism for my Original Characters, I only have two, for now, and maybe I could get some feedback on how to... Do this thing? xD here they are:

Mars
-Vampire Werewolf Hybrid, he's has a confident personality, with red eyes that dull when he's hungry, usually he wears leather jackets, smokes, and bothers women with his, flirty ways, which is practically the only way he can talk to people.

Ayden
- Mystical Dark Witch, (I don't like the term "Wizard" so I just call him a witch) He has brown hair, green eyes, and wears polos, or Hawaiian shirts, he has a very uptight personality, keeping everything he does a secret, He covers his head with a hood, and his eyes change color based on his mood. When he uses his magic, his veins that are on the top of his skin bulge and turn to a black to grey colour. His eyes do the same too. He is very powerful, and he lives alone. He's mostly a solitary loner.

What do you think?

 

[Idea]

Do you mean "criticism"?

 

[Pastry]

Do you mean "criticism"?

Sorry, yeah Criticism.

 

[Idea]

Well, the characters seem pretty interesting, if a bit edgy. However, there isn't really enough information to really help you out in fact at this stage of development I wouldn't call them characters yet

 

[Pastry]

Well, the characters seem pretty interesting, if a bit edgy. However, there isn't really enough information to really help you out in fact at this stage of development I wouldn't call them characters yet

I see, thank you for telling me this, any suggestions to a way I could improve the development of these... Ideas?

 

[Idea]

I see, thank you for telling me this, any suggestions to a way I could improve the development of these... Ideas?

Well, in the simplest way there is: expand them. Flesh them out. If a character's personality can be summed up in one word, they are less than one dimensional, for example. Expanding on their history, personality, tastes, how their magic actually works and what it can or can't do, giving more detail about their appearance, where they live, how they see the world and so many many other things you can add to simply expand the characters

 

[ceolsige]

I love to talk about OCs. What type of criticism are you looking for, exactly?

We just have a very basic idea of the premise of these characters, so it's difficult to say what they're lacking or what needs to be changed.

That said, the only advice I have so far is to be cautious with "loner" characters. They're obviously fine to RP, but make sure you help other players by creating situations where characters must interact. Otherwise, it can be exhausting for them to try and interact with a character who really just wants to be left alone.

A good way to find out about your character's strengths and weaknesses is to take a personality test as them! 16personalities.com is a really good one (even if you don't care for Meyers-Briggs tests) because it explains areas where people shine and where they struggle based on the answers.

 

[Oneirois]

You seem to have the same problem that almost everyone on this forum does, you're characters aren't fleshed out. They are interesting, though.