Poetry Late Night Writings

Just a place for me to dump the poems I write every now and then. Feel free to comment or something, if you wish. Word of warning, don't bother reading if you don't like dark, depressing poetry. Yes, I'm that poet. Occasionally, I might write something happy-ish. Also it's all in freestyle form. Final Disclaimer: It's shitty poetry.
Disappear
Slowly,
My body ebbs away,
Turning to dust in the wind.
It's too easy to disappear
If I don't make a sound,
For you will never just
Look.
I want to leave not a memory,
But a sigh.
You won't call my name,
Won't wonder where,
Won't look for my shadow.
It pains me to know,
I was never more than
A blurry face.

Half A Man
Do you pity me?
Don't.
Asking me how I am
When you already know,
How silly.
"The same as usual."
The same depressive low,
Right where you left me.
I don't care for these feelings,
Wishing them away.
I'm just half a man,
Broken from the start.

Sick Of You
Burning up,
You started a fire within me,
And now,
The blaze is eating me alive.
Ashes to dust.
Stress and anxiety leave me
Dizzy,
Gasping for breath.
'Keep calm,
It'll be okay,'
I remind myself.
Once upon a time,
I was drunk on your love.
But now,
I can't help drinking
To try and find the warmth
I once had.

Goodnight
Every time before I sleep,
I'm struggling to keep
Tears from seeping out
From this empty shell.
I yearn to dream the days away,
Craving the dark from
Dawn til dusk.
Sedate me with
Mournful lullabies,
The only thing that can touch
Lost souls like mine.

Pathetic
Watching you dance
Beyond my palms
Hurts the most.
Yet I laugh along,
Playing a game
I hate.
All for you,
All for you.
It's all for you.
I've let you break what I hold dear,
Taking a simple apology as compensation.
Forgiven you for the price of
One tear.
Anguished myself
So you can content yourself with
Friendship.
I ruin myself
For you.

Break My Heart Again
I'd do it all again,
Just to hold your hand.
Foolish for loving you,
Yet there is no regret.
The pain stings worse than
The finest rum,
But the taste lingers far longer.
You don't know this feeling,
This bitter taste.
I'm lovelorn,
Lonely without
Your touch.
I love too deeply,
You move on too easily.
 
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Close The Book
Perhaps it's time
To let go
Of your memory
Which I held so tight
That the edges tore,
That my hands bled,
That my life began to fall apart.
The end was so long ago,
Yet I was a reader stuck on
The last page,
Unwilling to close the book.
Awoken from unachievable fantasy
By the sun's rays upon my face,
I think
Perhaps it's time
To let go.
 
False Word
You called me "friend,"
And I believed it.
Yet I find myself
Forgotten,
Alone tonight.
Am I overthinking if
I doubt?
I am,
I know I am.
Still,
I am pained,
Left behind by the one
Who called me "friend."
The word feels
Empty.
You return,
Apology in hand.
How do you think you look?
A clown.
"I'm sorry,
My friend."
If I truly was,
How could you forget?
"It's fine."
I regret
Believing.
 
Oof, the line 'sedate me with morning lullabies' and your poem close the book gave me the feels! Love your writing <3
 
Farce
Don't need you
To hold me
Close,
Just let me love you.
Pitiful heart,
Can't breathe without
Your smile.
I won't ask for anything
In return for my
Devotion,
Just don't push me
Away.
I know you know,
See the look in my
Eyes.
Don't utter a sound;
I fear falling apart
If you deny me
This small joy.
Let's keep this farce alive,
You don't know
I love you.
 
Using You
Turn off the lights,
Let me believe
You're who
I want you
To be.
You're kind to let me
Pretend,
But I hear your heart breaking.
I'm sorry
I don't love you,
Using you to fill a void.
Yet you're happy,
Just to hold my hand
In the dark.
Our hearts are so close,
Yet too far to touch.
Love me,
Love me not.
 
Slog On
Everyday,
I'm dragging my feet
From the bed
To the door.
A little bit of distance
Feels like miles.
Stony-faced,
I greet the day.
It's raining outside,
How I feel inside.
But I'll put on a smile for
The sun hiding behind
The clouds.
Today's tomorrow,
The day I'll search
For something more,
Something to live for.
 
Hate To Be Human
Told myself
I hate you,
Wondered how
You could've been
Such a fool.
But now,
I find myself
Facing the mirror,
Scared to look
Between my fingers.
Striking is our
Resemblance.
No,
I don't want to be you.
Yet I'm changing,
Where did I go wrong?
Making all the same mistakes
As you,
I realize we're all just
Human.
I hate you,
And I hate myself too.
 
One Reason
Give me a reason,
One is all I need.
To forgive and
Forget.
It's so easy,
With my heart
In your hands.
I know it's a matter
Of time,
Til I pay for my
Foolishness.
But I can break
So many times
For you,
Just give me a reason.
 
Reaper
There's so much
Swirling
Behind your ashen gray eyes.
Your lips never part,
Never spare me a word.
Your touch is
Ice cold,
Hands as pale as
Snow.
I feel your blade
Resting upon my neck.
Calm,
Like you had done this
Thousands of time,
But this was my first;
My breath quickened,
Hands clutching the sheets.
I didn't beg,
It was below me,
And it wouldn't have moved
Your missing heart.
The clock struck twelve,
Ushering in an aura of
Finality.
Darkness fell,
Closing my eyes
Evermore.
 
High On Love
High on your love,
Can't see the cracks
In the pavement.
Mind's somewhere beyond the stars,
Don't feel my body
Tumbling down.
Suddenly so aware,
Staring up at the stars.
Will we be forever?
Reaching up to touch
Your hand,
Instead I catch the moon.
Darling,
I'll give it to you,
All for the price of
Your heart.
 
Crossed Signals
I mouth the words,
Unspoken sounds.
You see
Letters falling in a jumble.
But do you understand?
A message lies unread,
Just look into my eyes to know.
But you don't
Care to pick up hints.
Trying so hard to
Convey emotions,
From my heart to
Yours.
The phone rings,
Rings,
And rings...
Soundproofed transparent walls,
I pound away,
Shouting at deaf ears.
Collapsing at your feet,
I'm on my knees,
Separated by an inch of
Glass.
Why can't you understand?
 
Requiem For The Dogs
Forgive me.
Born to be free,
Now you are shackled to me.
I have given you
Sincere love,
But it's such a twisted thing.

Kept by my side,
You no longer remember the outside.
Bound for so long,
You don't feel the weight.
Loved you for so long,
I can't bear for you to leave.
May only death part us.

I lie and say,
You are happy.
But the only happiness you've known
Was one I forced upon you.
You never had a choice.
I chose you,
But you had never chose me.
I made myself your world,
You know not how to be without me.
Even if I let you go,
You'd return,
I'm all you know.

Forgive me,
I took your freedom
And gave you my twisted love.
Forgive me,
Even though I've taken away the world from you,
You've given me
Companionship,
Loyalty,
Happiness.
I am undeserving of your
Innocent love.
 
Thinking Of You
Piano music flows
From my fingertips,
Cascading down
Like a waterfall.
I look beyond the plain white
Ceiling
To see the stars.
Memories of us play
On rewind.
I can still feel your touch,
Lingering on my skin.
Desiring to sing
For the moon,
I open my mouth,
But the words are
Trapped butterflies
In a jar.
Choking,
The melody halts
As I fall to the floor,
Struggling to embrace
Your ghost.
 
Judgemental
So quick to judge,
A mask as
Truth.
But I can't bother to correct
Your delusions.
Think me a villain,
I think you a fool.
Hypocrite by nature,
Blind to your own
Flaws.
I pity you,
For all you never
See.
 
Enough
I won't ask you to say
You love me.
I'll give you the
World
At the drop of a hat.
You don't have to do
Anything,
Just don't leave me.
I'll treat you
Right,
Give you my
Heart,
But only if
You grace me with a
Passing glance.
Just that is
Enough
To keep the hearth
Burning.
 
It's Never Enough
I always disappoint,
I can see it in
Your eyes.
Wanting more
Than I can give.
Apologies aren't
Enough.
I'm not perfect,
But all you want is the
Idea of me.
Love isn't
Unconditional.

Father,
Have I tried enough yet?
I'm staring up at the ceiling,
Vision blurring,
Losing sight of
Dreams
That were never mine.
Mother,
Have I bled enough yet?
I'm on the kitchen floor,
Breathless,
Knife through
A tired heart.

Finally.
I am free,
Of your burdensome
"Love."
Please forgive your
Unfilial child.
 
Times Change
You're no longer
What you once were.
The warmth in my chest,
A simple joy,
A laugh.
How I miss those things,
Greeted by the
Lonely night.
Now you're just
A bottle of sleeping pills,
A memory to cry over,
A deleted photo.
You're no longer
What you once were.
 
Suicidal Happiness
Made up my mind,
To give it up
For you,
For me.
Felt like a burden,
Now I feel like
I'm free.
It's a blue moon;
I'm happy.
You don't know,
I won't tell.
Forget the goodbyes,
Let me smile
One last time.
 
The Monster Within
Caged by lies,
Hiding from the truth.
Never look in the mirror,
Never take off the mask.
Ugly inside,
Dark thoughts,
Negative feelings.
Keep the night away,
It's beckoning
The monster within.
Haunted by the present,
Scared of the future;
Don't let them see
The shadows of
The soul.
 

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