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Knock on Wood, Pilot, Episode 0

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Hircus Hornbrow
The sun is just coming up across a field of corn that wilts in the summer heat. The humidity hangs in whispy patches like white apparitions above the corn's tassels. A white and green Winnebago tears down a dirt access road swaying back and forth as it veers left and right avoiding the puddles left after last night's thunderstorm. The RV responds violently to the transition from dirt road to macadam. The driver eyes a single streetlight in the distance and what might be the glow of a neo sign.

A few minutes later the home on wheels is rolling slowly into a gravel parking lot and comes to a stop across three of the six parking spots. Lolli slumps back in her plush velour captain's chair. After a good minute, she leans forward and runs her hands across the genuine woodgrain dashboard of her vehicle. "Winnie? What say we don't cut it that close again, okay?" Then she raps her knuckles three times on the dash.

The RV door swings open and Lolli steps slowly down from the behemoth leaning heavily on her cane and the safety bar mounted on the door frame. Lolli is a short stout woman in her seventies. She is wearing pink polyester pants and a garish flowered top with way too many plastic beaded necklaces. Her permed hair is white, with a hint of blue and it hangs limp in the humid morning air. She has an "everyone's gramma" look to her face and a huge purse slung over her shoulder.

A few minutes later she is sitting in one of the diner's red glittered vinyl seats and stirring a pack of Sweet'n Low in her black coffee. The menu cover in front of her shows a black cauldron and a rainbow below the words, "The End of the Rainbow Diner, open 24hrs"

"Have you made a decision ma'am?" Asks the young waitress wearing a pink uniform. She's chewing gum and hovering her pen just above her green and white ticket pad.

"Honey, I have made a lot of decisions in my life, and not all of them worked out in my favor. I'm going to let you make this one. Just give me the special or whatever the cook makes best." Lolli puts her spoon down on the table and makes eye contact with the waitress who seems to have frozen mid-chew with her mouth hanging half open. With a quirk of her penciled in eyebrow, Lolli asks, "Honey? You all right?"

"How'd you know my name? I just started here." stutters the waitress. Lolli pinches her face and looks confused then notices the girl's name tag reads "Honeydew" in black embossed letters.

"Just a lucky guess I suppose." Lolli shakes her head and starts unfolding a newspaper she pulls from her giant purse.

The waitress walks over to the kitchen window and a greasy arm reaches through and taps the name tag on Honey's chest. "Oh, duh. Right."

Lolli has a red and black marker and she's circling random articles and pictures. Crossing some things out and drawing lines between others. This occupies her time until a bell rings at the kitchen window and Honey grabs a plate of eggs, bacon and hashbrowns and heads toward Lolli's table. Lolli folds up her paper and mutters something to herself like she is trying to form a word she hasn't said before.

"Here you go! Two eggs over the rainbow and a side of golden potatoes." Honey slides the plate across the table and leans into Lolli and whispers, "God, I hate sayin' that." Then she giggles and walks into the back, but before she can get through the door it swings open and the cook and a young man walk through together. The young man is drying his hands on a towel and the cook is counting out a few singles one at a time.

"I will have Honey bring out your breakfast. You've earned it. Thanks for giving me a hand last night. You just happened to walk in at the exact moment I was firing our last dishwasher." The cook hands the kid the small stack of bills and shakes his hand. "Too bad you won't be sticking around. I could use a good worker like you around here." Honey cracks her gum and squeezes between the men and into the kitchen. The cook nods and then heads back into the kitchen.

The dishwasher takes a few seconds to fold up the bills and stuff them in his pocket then looks around the diner for an open booth. They are all open, but one where Lolli sits eating her breakfast. He decides on the booth closest to the door then heads past Lolli's table to take a seat. As he passes her booth her hand reaches out and grabs him by the arm. "Marrok? Today is your lucky day! Please, have a seat and chat with me for a while. I have an offer for you dear."
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The bell rings above the door as a young man quietly enters The End of the Rainbow Diner. He smirked and shook his head as he looked up at the neon sign in the window. There were a pair of drunks slumped over their coffees sitting at the bar. One was clearly only being held up by the counter itself. Marrok looked around to try to find someone who looked like they might work here.

Marrok was in his early twenties, though he looked older, mostly because of his unshaven face and the sun damage from long days working outside. He was a large man, well over six feet tall and fairly muscular. He wore an old pair of jeans, steel toed boots, a white t-shirt, and a black jacket. Everything he had on him appears worn down or ripped. He stays where he can keep the door in his periphery, and looks into the kitchen window. He meets eyes with a teenage kid who looks completely terrified.

"Jason, you moron!" shouts a very angry man in the kitchen, "how dare you try to steal from me. Empty your pockets and get out of here, you're fired!" The teenager's head drops as his eyes begin to fill with tears. He rifles through his pockets for a moment, slapping a wad on money down into a large hand being held out in front of him before pulling the apron over his head and tossing it in the same direction. The door Marrok was standing next to swung open, nearly hitting him in the arm, as Jason ran out, cursing under his breath.

Marrok turns to the door, and pushes it open slowly. He sees the guy who had recently been yelling putting the cash into a safe. This older guy was balding and sweating through his own white t-shirt. Marrok smiled at him kindly and stepped through the threshold into the kitchen.

"Hey, staff only," the man said, though there was no urgency to his words.

"I heard what just happened, and I was wondering if you needed any help for the night?" Marrok motioned toward the kid who had just rushed out the front door. "I don't need a job, I'll work tonight for breakfast in the morning."

The man looked heartbroken, he was taking being betrayed by a kid pretty hard. "You know what, we were already pretty backed up back here, and we usually get a few truckers stopping' by in a couple hours, so sure, you've got yourself a job. What was your name, again?"

"Oh, I'm Patrick, nice to meet you." Marrok said, grasping the man's hand for a handshake and grabbing the apron. He's done dishwashing and cleaning jobs enough times that he didn't even need to be told what need to be done. He spent the night busing and mopping, cleaning things that looked like they hadn't ever been cleaned until they shone. One thing you learn going from odd job to odd job, if you do better than the people they hire, they are happy to pay you more.

When the morning came and Marrok had feigned reluctance at accepting money for his work, he was ready to sit down to his food. He needed enough energy to get close enough to the bunker in the next few days, or he was in trouble. Suddenly, as he was walking to the booth by the door, he felt a hand grasp his arm. He jumped as the old lady spoke to him.

"Shhh," he whispered as he lowered himself into the seat across from the lady, "keep it quiet, and how did you know my name?" He snapped as he slowly sat with his legs to the side. He didn't know if this old lady was a cop ready to take him in or some kind of stalker, but he didn't like either of those options. He stared at her with one eyebrow raised.


Hircus Hornbrow
Lolli pulls the newspaper from her giant purse and slaps it on the table. "It was in the paper kid. Isn't that where you get your information about the Universe?" She sips her coffee and pushes her half-eaten breakfast aside. "Look, I realize I am freaking you out right now, but I need you to understand that I am just as surprised by this as you are. I let my luck guide me where it wants me to go." She throws a thumb over her shoulder. "That beauty out there. That's my home and my castle. Winnie takes me where I need to go when I need to be there. I just have to be quick enough to get inside before she pulls away without me." Lolli pulls out a pack of candy cigarettes and offers one to Marrok. "In your case, Winnie brought me here to help you out. I know where you were going and I know why you were going there." She taps a red marker on the paper and snaps a piece of chalky candy off with her teeth. "You know what's black, white and red all over? A skunk in a blender. That joke stinks. I'm sorry" Lolli chuckles and pops the rest of the candy in her mouth and puts the box away. "I mean to recruit you son. You have the kind of skills I need in my travels. Don't deny it. The paper doesn't lie. You are a walking weapon and the first person I am crossing off in my personals column. Luck has brought us together. When you are ready to go we will grab your things and head out on the road. Sound good?"
Marrok stared at Lolli in disbelief for a few moments before snatching up the newspaper and opening it up. As he skimmed through, trying to find any mention of his name, he listened to the woman’s heart beat and smelled for any sweat that might indicate that she was lying to him. She seemed to be calm and honest, to his surprise. Marrok felt relieved, she was being truthful, or at least she thought she was.

He continued to read the paper, finding that it appeared to be a bunch of different papers from different times stuck together, when his food arrived. He didn’t stop to look down, he just shoveled what was on the plate into his mouth. He looked like he hadn’t eaten in days, which was probably because he hadn’t. He didn’t respond to the odd lady until after his plate was cleared.

“Well, you know what, ma’am, I truly don’t have anything better to do than spend a day or two trying to figure out what you’re on about.” He didn’t want to believe what he was saying, but he knew it was true. “It seems important to you that I join you to do something, and I guess I’ve been following my ‘luck’ for a while as well, so maybe we should see where luck takes us.” He felt odd, he didn’t like staying in one place for too long, and he felt like this diner was becoming less and less safe as the morning went on. “Give me a minute, and I will meet you by, ‘Winnie” was it?”

Marrok stepped outside the front door and went around to the back of the diner. He reached behind the large dumpster and pulled out a canvas backpack that he had to struggle to lift over his shoulders. He reached into his pockets to feel the wad of cash and a heavy-duty padlock in the left front pocket, along with the brass knuckles and the sturdy metal key in the right. He began to walk back to the parking lot. The bag rattled with every step, but it is hard to keep a bag filled with heavy chains from making a lot of noise.
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Junior Member
Erik wakes to the sound of someone knocking at the door to his van, a 1978 Dodge Tradesman with a kickass mural painted along the side. Grabbing a shirt, he opens the door to an angry store manager and a resigned-looking cop. With a wide grin, Erik cuts them off before they can start in on him. "Mornin', fellas, grocery open yet?" he asks as he climbs out of the vehicle.

"See, just another early bird customer. Nothing to be worried about, Sal." the cop says, and the manager leaves in a huff to go continue opening the store for the day. "Sal's a bit jumpy, is all," he says to Erik, "came in this morning for coffee and donuts as usual and got an earful about the 'sketchy van that's been lurking for hours.'"

"Sorry mister, uh, officer..." Erik glances down at the man's name plate "Mertz. Didn't mean to cause trouble, was just passing through town overnight and needed to sleep. Empty parking lot seemed appropriate, thought I'd grab some breakfast here before getting back on the road. On my way to Wyoming."

"What's in Wyoming?" Mertz asks.

"Yellowstone is. From there I'll head to Colorado, Utah, then Arizona. I'm going around, trying to visit all national parks. Already been to four of 'em!" he beams.

"Sounds like a good trip," Mertz says, "alright, I gotta get back to work now. Stay outta trouble, and don't pay Sal no mind. He won't hurt ya any." He gets back in the patrol car and drives off.


Hircus Hornbrow

"I promise to give you more information, but it can wait until we pick up the rest." Lolli pauses to pull another paper from her purse and the continues, "Erik is next on my list. He's already got himself out of a pickle this morning. I think he is going to be an asset to our little adventure. Now run along and grab your things. I will make my way to WInnie." After MArrok leaves Lolli takes one last bite of her breakfast and a sip of her coffee. She stands and makes her way across the restaurant toward the cash register by the door.

"How was everything?" Says Honey as she stabs the order slip onto a large nail with last nights slips. Honey pauses and her eyes go wide as a large man dressed in overalls and no shirt shoulders through the door and shoves a knife in the face of the frightened waitress.

"Pop the drawer and give me the cash girl!" Says the dirty man with a knife. "I'm not fucking around here! Pop the cash drawer."

Across the diner the kitchen door swings open and the cook stops dead in his tracks with his arms outstretched in a calming gesture. "Don't do anything you'll regret mister. We'll give you the money. You don't need to hurt anyone. You'll get what you want."

None of the other occupants of the restaurant pay any mind to the feeble old lady pulling a snub-nose revolver from her purse until she clicks the hammer into place and says, "Get your sweaty, stinky ass out of this restaurant you chicken livered gollumpus. I'm going to watch you running all the way down that road. If you so much as think about turning around before you are out of sight you're gonna get a hot lead injection up your cornhole." The man backed up toward the door wide-eyed and breathing heavy. Lolli advanced toward the man and he turned and ran through the door which clanged the bell and brought the onlookers back into the moment.

"Mam?" croaked Honey.

"Oh, right! The check." responded Lolli.

The cook moved quickly toward the door and watched as the bibbed man ran clumsily down the road. He ran his hand through his hair and turned back around toward the old woman. "Mam, uh, you don't owe us nothing for breakfast. I, uh... Thanks."

"Aren't you a dear!" says Lolli. She puts her purse back over her shoulder, grabs her cane from the counter and nods a goodbye to both of the stunned diner employees.

Outside, Lolli sees Marrok has retrieved a bag from behind the dumpster and is heading toward the Winnebago. In the distance, a man can still be seen running wildly south down the long straight road. The two pile into the RV and head north toward Paradise, Kansas and a grocery store parking lot.
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Marrok stumbled around to the front of the diner. He could see an odd man with no shirt running down the street. He could smell the fear on him from here, and he caught himself before letting out a growl. Something about this guy rubbed him the wrong way. Maybe he was the reason why Marrok had been feeling nervous while he was inside. Was he watching me?

He stepped over to the strangely parked RV and waited for a few moments before Lolli came through the front door of the diner. “Everything all set?” he asked, with the fake smile he reserved for when he was talking to a crazy person. “You know, I learned your vehicle’s name, but never picked up yours, ma’am.” He looked at her from across the front seat as he pulled himself up into the passengers side. He slammed the heavy bag down on the floor beside his seat and leaned out to offer the old lady his assistance getting into the vehicle.

He thought to himself how crazy this situation was, but he knew it wasn’t quite the weirdest he had experienced. He thought back to the trucker who had tried to drug him after he picked him up. That didn’t turned out well for that guy, he chuckles to himself softly. At the very least, he knew that if this lady was going to try to hurt him, he had a few tricks up his sleeve. And if worse came to worse, the chains might be left in their bag.


brrnn. brrnn. brrnn. brrnn.
She didn't need the alarm clock to wake up this morning. She'd already been up for 1 hour, 53 minutes, and 21... 22... 23... 24 seconds. That's expected though, she wasn't very tired Selene only just managed to get to Paradise, Kansas at dusk, a few minutes before nightfall. In her arrival, though, she managed to spot a grocery store and a police station nestled among the 25-odd homes. Then the powder blue pickup truck she hitchhiked in on pulled into the small motel, made up of only an office and the 4 rooms attached to it. The driver, a friendly cowboy type named Rory with light gray hair and a face with plenty of folds and creases, was travelling across the state from Indianola, Nebraska to visit his mother in Lincoln, Kansas, she'd recently had a heart attack. She was fine, but the scare, at her age was enough to shock him into setting aside his grudges with his brothers to make the drive from to see her in . His night blindness was a big problem for night travel and his truck would shut itself off when the high beams came on, so his only choice was to stop just short of Selene's next planned location, Russell. But Paradise had a place to sleep and a place to buy food, so it was good enough for her.

Rory took off his hat and scratched the back of his head, his baritone voice sounding like what you'd expect this time of the evening to sound like, if it had a voice, "looks like this is where we part ways, little missy. Seein' as our ways seem t'fork no more than an hour outta here, I'm thinkin' this is g'bye. Russell's got its air'o'port, if that's what'cher lookin' t'pay for, an' if not, bus station's right there too. I'd be willin' t'buy ya a sandwich or somethin' for the road, but dunno if ya'd be up s'early as me."
Selene giggled at the idea of Rory gawking at her, after watching her assemble a sandwich that's just a slice of cheese, some lettuce and spinach on bread. "I uh... figure maybe y'forgot right 'bout... half yer sandwich there, missy."
"No thank you, Rory." The sharp contrast of their accents would have been shocking to anyone listening. His accent was thick and about as American as the corn fields they'd been driving by for hours. Hers was refined, a product of all the years her mother spent as a child in Ilford, learning how English is spoken properly; definitely foreign, "British," with the slightest Americanisms slipping in here and there thanks to her father, a musician who was in the right city at the right time when the great cultural shifts of the 60's started happening. "I value a few hours more of sleep than I do a good meal. But I'm grateful for the offer. Although, if we run into each other again, I'll definitely follow up on said offer."
"I'll take m'payment in a copy'a yer book, once y'get it all wrote up, y'know where t'send it. Don't keep me waitn' too long, only got so much more time on God's green Earth."
"It's still all just in my head, but I'll send you a first edition as soon as I'm done getting it printed."
"Take care 'a yerself, S'lene. Not everyone's friendly like me."
"Thank you, Rory."
She smiled. They shook hands, head into the office, paid for each of their rooms, and each went to bed. And now it was morning, 6AM cold sun streaming through her open windows while she washed her clothes in the sink becoming the 8AM morning sun, the one she knew so well from all the years of public schooling. Alarm buzzing six minutes before the end of her combination morning stretches and mindfulness meditation, her usual morning routine. Didn't cash in those extra hours of sleep after all.
"Looks like it's time to head to the grocery store to pick up some food, then off on the open road again."

She marveled and had a chuckle at the very out-of-place van with a rather visually loud painting along the side of it in the parking lot of the grocery store. Walking in, she went straight for the produce, grabbing some celery, broccoli and carrots, with a red bell pepper for variety, then on her way past the bagged breads and assorted preserves, a jar of Peter Pan, for the protein. Unexpectedly expensive, that jar of peanut butter, but it makes sense, it might have been one of the only 5 the town might get that year. It didn't matter, her savings were still relatively untouched. So taking big bites straight out of that bell pepper, she went to return her key, and left, her big white umbrella strapped to her wrist, ready to walk all the way to Russell.
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Junior Member
Walking out of Sal's grocery with a cup of coffee and a small bag of groceries, Erik sees a familiar face walking by his van.

"Hey, Pepper!" he calls out to get her attention, then walks over.

"Last I saw you were bumming around Kentucky. How's the book going?"


She spins around after a second or two of chewing, after realizing he was talking to her.
Mouth half full of bell pepper, a muffled "Oh." swallow
"I remember you, but I don't remember your name... Derek? Did you buy a new van? I don't... Hmm. Now that I think about it, it was late into the night, wasn't it? The book, ah, still as in my head as ever. I've got about ten pages written, but I don't know where they go, exactly. Funny we meet up again out here. I went up to Michigan for a while and somehow we still managed to cross paths here. Which way you headed? I was planning on heading to Russell, but if you're headed to another big city, I'd greatly appreciate a lift."


Hircus Hornbrow
Lolli accepts Marrok's help into her RV with a smile. "Thank you, son. These bones are creaking a lot more than they used to. She drops her mammoth purse between the front seats on the floor and reaches out to turn the ignition and Winnie wakes up with a roar. "Sorry about the introductions. I am starting to run out of time. My name is Lolli and we need to get our asses in gear."

A quick side mirror adjustment, a button press on the 8 track selector and she puts the vehicle in gear while stomping on the gas kicking stones up on the edge of the road. Lolli doesn't offer much in the way of conversation. Her hands are white on the wheel and her face is showing a little less confidence than displayed back at the diner. The weather seems to be taking a turn for the worse outside the passenger side window. A person with less fortitude that her current passenger may have been unconsciously reaching up above the window for the "oh shit" handle. Stevie Wonder blasts from the dash-mounted speakers.

Very superstitious, writings on the wall
Very superstitious, ladders bout' to fall...

We see a grocery store parking lot from the sky. The blacktop lot is a large rectangle surrounded by cornfields on two long and one short side and a highway on the fourth side. The square Acme market is smack dab in the center of the lot. It's still morning and there are very few cars parked in front of the store. Behind the store, there are trailer trucks unloading their goods at the dock.

Shifting to the view from the front of the store anyone there would start to see a shadow filling the sky to the west and they might even hear a low hum. A white Winnebago barrels down the road and the tires shriek as the monstrous vehicle turns sharply into the Acme parking lot and makes a beeline for a van and two people talking nearby. The Winnebago comes to a groaning stop and Lolli hangs her head out of the window. "Selene and Erik, you don't know me. I'm Lolli and I am here to save your asses." Then she looks to the sky and frowns at the cloud of insects that is getting too close for her to keep up the pleasantries. "Get your asses in the van and follow me." She points to the sky. "Unless you want to get eaten alive. Something cricket this way comes!" She rolls up her window with the crank and stomps on the gas pedal.

There is no time to take the road. Lolli cuts a hard right and plows directly through the tall cornfield. Fortunately, Winnie's captain's chair provides an excellent, slightly higher than the corn tassels vantage point. A few seconds later and the RV bounces violently off the macadam lot and into the tall corn. The sound of the long corn leaves slapping the flat fronted vehicle makes it very difficult to hear anything else.
"What kind of game are you playing, Lolli!" Marrok almost raises from his seat before the bumping of the RV knocks him back down on his ass. "I don't know how much you know about me, but it seems to be enough to assemble the A-Team of people I've fucked up in front of!"

He thought back to that horrible night in New Mexico when he followed that girl home after nearly gutting her would be attacker. He thought of the night he nearly ripped a robber's face clean from his skull in front of that kid. He slumped down in his seat. Memories of things he had done, and some more disturbing memories that slipped through from his other side, began flowing through his mind.

He was too distracted by the crazy driving and seeing those people from his past to notice the shadow hovering overhead.


Junior Member
Erik looks over at Selene, confused by what just happened. "Do you know that lady?" he asks.

He climbs in the driver's seat and taps the dashboard. "Alright. You wanna head to Russell or you wanna go on an adventure?" His eyes glimmer with excitement.


"Never seen her before in my life. She seems interesting...? Adventures sound fun. Mind if I jump in the passenger seat?" At his invitation to climb on in, she takes another chomp of her bell pepper, then opens the sliding doors, puts down her belongings, then opens the passenger door and takes her seat, buckling up, and closing the door behind her.
"She seems to be a tad... rushed? Especially driving about 80 miles per hour through that field. You don't happen to know her either, do you?"
The buzzing haze, surely growing louder and darker, stays undetected by her.


Hircus Hornbrow
"It's a game alright Marrok. A game of chance." Lolli struggles to hold onto the massive steering wheel of the Winnebago. Her age is showing as her old frame bounces in her seat. She leans to her left to look into the side mirror. "What are they doing!? Don't they see the damn bugs bearing down on them?"

Looking to her right she sees the confusion and worry on Marrok's face. "This isn't how I would have planned it to happen Marrok. You got to just pull it together and trust me."

The RV explodes from the field and bounces back onto the road. Corn shocks hang from the mirrors and grill. The dark cloud in the sky grows closer and it's clear that they will not outrun it.


Junior Member
Suddenly caught in the storm of locusts, Erik slams the brakes, confused as to what to do. After a quick conversation with Selene, they come up with a plan and he starts driving carefully forward again. The windshield wipers are running full speed in a futile attempt to maintain visibility, and Erik constantly honks the horn to alert any other vehicles or pedestrians he can't see.

They eventually arrive back in the grocery store parking lot.
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Junior Member
Erik looks across the seat. "Selene, I an coming to you for advice. I have absolutely no idea what to do in this situation except try to drive out of the storm and hopefully not run anybody over. Please tell me you have some idea we could try."


Locusts doing this isn't normal, they usually don't swam like this, not on inorganic objects. Something's wrong.
"Let's get out of here, flip on the wipers and lights, and make sure you honk the horn, especially if you want those other two to know where we are. I'll give you directions."
And even with Selene guiding their path, they end up in deeper trouble than they were.

"Um, okay. So we're in a bind, potentially life or death, with no clear answers, so time to do some risky solutions. How about smoke and fire? Bugs hate that. We could pull gas out of the tank, but then we're limiting our escape. How about the grocery store? They've got to have some kind of fuel in there. It might not be the best thing, but it might be our best chance."
"Lolli, if you want your little recruits to be alive enough to help you, we might want to turn around and help 'em," Marrok would shout as he stares out the back, rifling around for a can of hair spray. Once he grabs one, he pulls out his lighter and sits back in the passengers seat, hand on the crank ready to open the window.


Hircus Hornbrow
Without notice, Lolli slams on the brakes and pulls the Winnebago off to the side of the road. "Marrok, I can't go back. Winnie won't make it through that mess. You are going to have to go back without me if you want to help them." Lolli turns the ignition off and pulls the keys out tossing them into the center console. "I didn't see this coming, which is saying a lot. I will wait here for you if you go. I think the bug storm has stopped advancing. That could only mean it has reached its destination. I wish I could go with you, but..." and she lifts her cane to illustrate her point.
Marrok rolls his eyes and lets out a more animalistic growl than he had intended. "I'll do what I can, can't let your 'team' die, can I?" He steps out of the R.V. and crouches down behind it. He knows that Lolli knows a lot, but doesn't want to show off if she hadn't learned about this. He concentrates for a moment as he begins to grow claws and fangs, extra hair grows from most of the relatively hairless areas on his body, and a tail grows out from under his jacket. He feels the power flow through his body as he shifts to his wolf-man form. He stores the lighter and the hair spray inside the zippered pockets of his jacket and takes off on all fours in the direction that he last saw the van covered in bugs. Fuck, why do I keep getting myself into this kind of shit.


Junior Member
Erik carefully maneuvers his van around back of the grocery store, backing into the loading dock. Moving quickly, he jumps out the back door of the van and opens the door to the store's storage facility.


Hircus Hornbrow
Lolli looks into the rearview mirror and smiles. She reaches down into her enormous purse and digs blindly until she finds a paperback book. Leaning back she opens the book and begins to read. Just then, the side mirror cracks and she shakes her head. "Good luck kids." she murmurs.


Junior Member
Looking around the storage room of the grocery store, Erik notices a box shivering unnaturally. Carelessly investigating, Erik shoves the box aside to reveal a trembling Sal. Upon being discovered the man unleashes two large cans of Raid, causing them both to break into a massive coughing fit.

"Ugh, what the hell!" Erik stumbles back, waving his hand to clear the air.

"Sorry, sorry!" Sal exclaims, "what are you even doing back here?"

Erik wipes his eyes. "Pepper there had an idea to drive off the bugs. We need cooking oil, and a lot of of it. We're gonna start a few fires and hopefully the smoke will drive them away."
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