Fantasy I Was Fine Until You

[British. Intelligence.]

For a moment Lance thought that she was going to answer the door, that she’d decided this was stupid, no actually, downright ridiculous and pathetic. Maybe she was laughing at him? After all, she hated him, why would she agree to go on a date with him, it was probably some plan to hu- oh wait, she’d opened the door. He did notice her face was red but he found it endearing and encouraging. She was looking pretty, but she always was so he guessed that wasn’t saying much but he was glad she wasn’t dressed too fancy, people would probably question them and he didn’t exactly have anything that extravagant planned. No, this more simple dress meant it was easier to focus on her rather than what she was wearing and the image she tried to project.

He smiled at her, glad the first words out of her mouth weren’t an attempt to turn him away. It’s not that he was doubting himself it was just they were both aware that this was probably a bad idea. Funny how both of them had agreed to it though. “I’ve asked you on a date, not your makeup” Lance told her, she was beautiful without, that was certainly true, but even had she looked a bit plain without makeup, it’s not like he cared, he wasn’t that shallow as much as he appreciated a beautiful lady. “But if you want to, I don’t mind waiting” he said, he was aware that some people were self conscious without it.

”I would’ve loved to take you to town but obviously that’s off the table” Lance murmured, although the it would’ve been nice to get away from all the people here and go to a restaurant or whatever was happening there, maybe a dance or festival. “But I thought you might still like to get out of these walls” he said. “I know a little spot outside, I got something fancy from the kitchen and I figured we could sit out there and eat. Some fresh air will be good, and I know it doesn’t sound like much but I promise it’ll be nice” It was simple but there was only so much they could do. And it was probably best that they weren’t spotted, it would cause some issues but Lance was fairly confident that no one would find them, not many people visited that spot and not at this hour. Fingers crossed she didn’t try to kill him then if they weren’t viewable.

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin for a moment considered fleeing back into her room. Shutting the door behind her. This wasn't a good idea. He was the enemy. But she could not bring herself to do that. Glancing away from Lance and humming. "Well, I suppose it is fine without. " She said. Attempting to regain some composure and rid herself of the horrid blush on her face. Stepping out, She closed the door behind her and glanced about. They were alone. But even had someone walked past, They'd know better then to question Lance. The king also was likely distracted so Gavin doubted he'd come looking for her. She then found herself grinning at Lance when he started talking. "A picnic? Its... Been a while since I've gone on one. I.. Yeah, That sounds lovely. " It had not been a uncommon thing for Gawain to take them on such things when she was small. But after getting married, Those times had stopped. Shame, Picnics were always nice.

Gavin then gestured for Lance to lead the way. Walking beside him. Biting her lip as she walked. She couldn't help but feel awkward and tense. Did Lance feel the same? Gavin supposed this was more his area of expertise. But eventually she found herself saying. "You know, I'm surprised your not married. " She said without thinking. But her words were true. It was odd... As much as Lance seemed to get around. She would have figured he'd have married someone by now. "Its... Odd, You're a famed knight, And your certainly handsom-" She faltered a bit at her words but soon shook her head. Continuing. "Anyway, Surely you get plenty of offers? " Surely plenty would want to have a marriage arranged with him.

Though, Maybe Lance had refused them? He did seem like a wildcard. Gavin also wasn't sure Antonio would try and arrange something. But, Even without accepting a arranged marriage. Lance had dated many women, Had none caught his eye? Gavin supposed she could not judge his lack of marriage too much. She didn't intend to remarry anytime soon. Though she might not be given much choice in the matter. Gavin figured she would not need to worry about being forced to marry someone for atleast a few years.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Lance’s smile brightened as she agreed to his picnic. He had wondered if maybe she’d find it too undignified or disappointing but they didn’t have too many options. Lance led her down the corridors which were luckily quite empty. They might not be stopped should they be spotted but they might be talked about and it was best that there weren’t any storied about them floating about just in case Alexander heard or something, especially If he mentioned that he hadn’t requested Gavin’s presence like Lance had told thst knight.

He glanced at her in surprise as she brought up marriage. He guessed maybe it was odd, he dated a lot of women, Gavin was probably wondering what was wrong with him. He smiled again as she called him handsome but he wasn’t going to leave her question hanging. “Some” he admitted. “But I’m not interested in arranged marriages to women I’ve never met” he told her. “I want to be in love before I get married. And there’s been a few women who I thought might be the one but it’s never worked out” he admitted. “And now that Galahad is in the mix? Finding a wife might be even more difficult” he said.

”As much as I’d love to get married, I’m not desperate for it” he explained. “I’m still young, despite what others might have you believe“ like Caleb. “And I’ve got Galahad to look after. There’s no need for me to rush into a marriage, it’ll come when it comes” he said, pushing open a door to take them outside, holding it open for her before he carried on past the courtyard and training grounds, towards the lake just beyond them. He led Gavin to a big willow tree, the hanging branches And leaves like a curtain which he parted for her to reveal a blanket on the ground, a few cushions and a picnic basket. The tree kept them out of sight of anyone who might walk by really with its branches, except the side facing the lake was sparser and could be seen through more easily, giving them a nice view of the water. Lance would asked about her marriage except he figured it was probably a touchy subject seeing as her husband had just died and she was already on a date, might make her regret it or turn around and leave. “I would like to get married someday” he insisted, “to have someone I could come home to and spend my days with, but I’ve yet to find the right lady. I would worry About Galahad thinking I’m replacing his mother though” he confessed. “Not thst he even seems to recognise me as his father” he didn’t even seem to recognise Lance at all which was upsetting but Gavin didn’t need to hear about that. Still, she might have some advise since she too was a parent, although more experienced no doubt.

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin listened to him curiously as they walked. Lance seemed hopeful to marry one day. But such was not in the cards anytime soon Gavin supposed. Her head tilted to the side. Only pulling her gaze away when she noticed the distance they had walked away from the castle. It wasn't to far, But briefly she did worry about being so far. Lance could very well be planning to murder her and ditch her body! But when she saw the little picnic prepared. Any worries soon melted away. She just had a feeling she was safe. Hopefully the two would remain undisturbed. Walking forward, She couldn't help but murmur softly. "This is sweet. " She mused. Before looking back to him as he continued talking. Now his focus seemed to be on his son.

Gavin could understand his worries. Some sounded almost familiar to her. She thus focused on Lance for a moment before saying. "You should find him a tutor. He... Needs to learn how to communicate. It'll make your own life a lot easier. " He'd be able to actually talk to Lance. Be able to explain when something was wrong or her was upset. Lance would be able to talk to him about things. Gavin might have made some suggestions of where to look for one. But she wasn't sure how much Lance would trust her over such things. Finally she then walked over to Lance. Carefully sitting down, Gaze moving to the lake. It truly was a lovely view.

Gavin then confessed to Lance. "I... Gabriel doesn't really understand why her dads not around anymore. She knows he's passed. But I don't think she really knows what that means. She keeps asking for him, And I just don't know what to say to her anymore. " Perhaps it was a dim thing to start there date with. But Lance was... Well, Easy to be honest with. Gavin though did decide to go to a bit lighter of a subject. "I heard that Galahad just sort of showed up at your doorstep. I'm surprised you didn't have a heart attack. " She teased. Actually, She was more surprised he had even taken Galahad in. Sure he was his son... But Gavin wanted Lance to be bad. To prove to her that he was awful. It was more difficult to hate him when she didn't think he was a horrible person.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

He was glad she seemed to like his little set up for the date, even if it was a little simple. “Wait for the fireflies to come out” he said, then it was something magical. He would admit that she wasn’t the first person he’d brought here but she maybe wasn’t expecting to be anyway. Still, Lance quite liked to come here on his own as well just to relax. And oddly, he did feel a bit relaxed in her company. They weren’t talking about the horrible recent history between their families, no they were talking about their children and it was nice, put him at ease.

”I’ve been trying to teach him myself when I get the chance, and my father was teaching him whilst I was away” When he wasn’t locked up but Lance decided not to linger there, they didn’t need to sour the mood. “I will have a look though, they’ll probably know far better than me what they’re doing and I’ve still got a job to do, I can’t let Galahad fall behind just because I’m busy“ no, he needed someone who had time to teach him and although Lance was able to be with him for the time being, he knew that might change and there were people more qualified than him on teaching him things like communication and maths. When and if Galahad wanted to learn how to fight, Then he could teach him.

Lance got comfy on the blanket, watching her as she talked about Gabriel. “That must be difficult” he commiserated, to have your child want someone that would never come back, to have to be reminded often that your husband had passed and to not know how to comfort your daughter. He didn’t really know what to suggest, he wasn’t sure there was anything but persevering snd maybe explaining it to Gabriel again if she could bear it, might be upsetting for both of them though. Talk of Galahad was a little lighter though and he smiled at her. “Me too to be honest” he said. “When the maid fetched me saying there was something for me outside the castle, I wasn’t expecting A kid. It was a shock snd I was way out of my depth, still am, but from the moment I laid eyes on him, I knew he was mine snd that I loved him” maybe he’d been unsure about how to be a father and what to do, but he’d never doubted that he loved his kid.

”He came with a note, originally his mother said she’d only drop him off for a few weeks, she Wasn’t even there with him” he explained. “But that wasn’t to be the case, Elaine’s….troubled and I have her to look after as well. She has her better days but I’m glad she’s safe now. And I’m glad that I get to keep Galahad in my life, I would’ve hated for him to be taken away from me” He’d already missed out on so much of his little boy’s life, he didn’t want to miss any more. “But I was so clueless when I first got him, I asked Caleb for help but she wasn’t any wiser, and I didn't even know he was deaf Then. But whilst I was away I actually met someone who was deaf, they communicated to their husband with this sort of…sign language. I got them to give me some sheets with it on snd I’m trying to teach that to Galahad” he explained. “Hopefully he’ll manage to pick it up, I’d love to be able to have a proper conversation with him, right now it’s just ‘hungry’ or ‘sleepy’ or he’s giggling or he’s crying. I know he’s still young But I’m sure there’s things in his little brain he wants to get out” it had to be isolating snd frustrating not to be able to communicate your thoughts to someone else so easily.

”and most of all I want him to know there’s people that love him, that I’ll do my best to look after him. I couldn’t imagine my life without him now to be honest and I love him like nothing I’ve ever loved before, it’s strange, I’ve not even known him that long but I’d do almost anything for him,“ he confessed. He figured he was rambling on a bit though. “I’m sure you understand though with Gabriel, she seems like a nice girl, I bet she’s smart too with you as her mother” he mused, he knew the king took advice from Gavin and she was clearly a schemer and she’d gotten away with all those crimes for so long, yeah she was smart, if a bit conniving. “I bet she’s going to be a nightmare when she’s old enough to sneak out” Lance said with a grin, especially if she was like Gwen as Gavin had suggested. “Did you do much sneaking out when you were younger? Or are you too prim and proper for that?” He teased gently, maybe she was just a bit meek, or Gawain and Agravain too scary and watchful.

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin listened to Lance fondly as he spoke about Galahad. It was obvious he already loved his son dearly. It was sweet. Lance also spoke fondly of Elaine. Gavin had seen the women a few times in the castle. Her eyes constantly seeming lost. It was odd and Gavin considered asking more about the women. But figured for the moment it best to leave the subject alone. Gavin then mused gently. "I'm sure he'll get the hang of your sign language. Kids are smart, And well, I think we all have a need to communicate. " It might take time, But Gavin figured Galahad would learn the basics soon enough. It would no doubt be a relief for Lance.

Gavin then smiled softly at the mention of Gabriel. Though soon she found her cheeks heating up at Lance's question. Waving her hand. "Sneaking out was more Gwen's thing. I've no clue where she went when she was gone. " Gavin said in amusement. Perhaps she was visiting some neighborhood boy. Or getting into mischief with Gaheris? Gavin didn't know. Though everytime Gwen went missing poor Gawain was in a panic.

She then looked towards Lance, Raising her eyebrow as she mused. "Do I even need to ask if you snuck out a lot? " Knowing Lance? The answer was probable a yes. She'd heard the stories about him and his antics. She had a feeling he might have been even worse as a teenager! Antonio must have had a lot of patience to deal with him! Gavin then found her gaze flickering towards the lake. Admiring the view. It was nice. She then confessed to Lance. "I didn't like dirt when I was little. " Amusement clear on her face. Yeah, Lance's guess of prim and proper might have been right. Gavin then told him. "I liked pretty things. I wanted to be like one of those princesses in old stories. " She could recall many times sitting up in her room looking at the pretty drawings in fairytale stories. Sometimes Gawain would come to read to her. Such were nice memories.

Gavin then said. "You know, I once managed to get Agravain to let me put makeup on him? " A mischievous grin forming on her face. It hadn't been a easy task. But eventually she'd managed it! Though Agravain might prefer to forget the memory. It had been fun to practice. Sure, Gavin had from time to time practiced on Gwen and Gareth. But they always squirmed! It was far nicer when she managed to convince Agravain or Gawain into allowing her to do such.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Lance hoped Gavin was right but he did believe that Galahad would be able to pick it up, I mean Lance was good at languages, why wouldn’t His son be? He just had to keep trying with him and he imagined it’d help once Galahad actually started liking him again, if he ever did. He guessed once he got him a tutor he could get them to help teach Galahad the sign language and lip reading too like that lady had known. It’d almost be like his first words once he learnt It, Lance was excited for that.

Lance smiled softly as she talked about her sister, from what he’d heard it wasn’t surprising that she’d be one to sneak out. Gavin however didn‘t seem to have done the same. Lance’s smile widened into a cheeky grin as she speculated about him. “Maybe once or twice” he said in a voice which suggested it was a lot more. What? He’d had things to do, people to see snd trouble to get into. And growing up they’d been travelling, there was always somewhere new to see. And okay, maybe he’d snuck off with a few girls but not always, him and Galehaut used to sneak off once they’d become friends and really anyone else he’d managed to befriend. Yeah poor Antonio, like it wasn’t stressful enough to raise and teach his child on his own whilst travelling.

He listened to story before pointing out: “Gavin you practically are a princess“ she was the king’s niece, it didn’t really get much closer than that. But he guessed it wasn’t the same if you weren’t living in a castle with pearls and princes to visit. “Oh, I bet he was beautiful” Lance laughed, he could imagine Agravain all dolled up but with a face like thunder. “I don’t have any siblings but it might’ve been nice to have a brother” he mused. “Maybe would’ve made it easier to get away with things if all my father’s attention wasn’t just on me. But I’ll admit I did like the attention quite a lot at times, I’m sure you can guess” Was it any surprise that Lance liked for eyes to be on him? “Except when he decided I was getting a bit big for my boots, he’d knock me on my arse in training just to remind me that I still had a lot to learn” Lance would probably be even more sufferable if Antonio had tried to humble him a bit. “He wasn’t the happiest when I got good enough that it didn’t work anymore” obviously Antonio was happy That Lance was a good fighter and could take care of himself but well, he worried Lance’s ego would consume him. So far it hadn’t, he was still willing to learn, even if his confidence was annoying, but Antonio didn’t want him getting too big a head, might be a bit late for that though.

(I’m going on holiday for a week today so don’t know what the signal is going to be like, should be back next Friday if I can’t post in the meantime )

 

[Officer Newt]

(Have a fun holiday! )

Gavin couldn't help but grin at Lance's comment. He was right, She certainly was close to being a princess. Perhaps if she played her cards right she might end up marrying a prince? Except no, Those had been fantasies from her childhood. Now, She thought she'd much rather a more quiet life. Lance seemed to enjoy the talk of poor Agravain being forced to have a makeover. His words causing a soft laugh to come from her. "Well, He certainly was something. Maybe beautiful isn't the right word. " Gavin had been fairly young then. So she hadn't exactly been the best at such things. But hey! It had certainly been fun.

Gavin then listened to him talk and it was certainly a odd idea. Not having siblings. Growing up Gavin and her siblings had been so close. They'd needed eachother. Gavin didn't know how they would have survived without eachother. Gavin then told Lance. "It seems lonely. Not having siblings around. " Gavin then awkwardly smiled. And told Lance. "When I first moved in with my husband. It was so strange. Because it was always so quiet in that house. Atleast until Gabriel came along. " She then looked to Lance. Saying. "No little kids screaming and causing mischief to wake you up. No, Gawain frantically trying to get us to all sit down for breakfast. Or Agravain having to be the stern parent. " It had been odd, Eventually Gavin had gotten used to being away from them. But it had been a difficult adjustment.

Gavin then found herself asking Lance. "Do you... Think you'll end up having more kids? " Perhaps that was to far in the future to think about. Lance had Galahad to think about. But he might like another little one. Gavin then confessed. "I think I wouldn't mind another one day. I miss the frantic ruckus I grew up in. " She didn't plan to have as many children as her mother had. But, It would be nice for Gabriel to have a little sibling.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

(thanks)

Gavin couldn't imagine life without siblings whereas Lance could barely imagine life with them. Theyd clearly had very different childhoods. He supposed it might have been lonely had he not been so outgoing but Lance had made plenty of friends who had kept him company. Besides, when he wasn't with them he'd been too busy to be lonely. Plus he got along with his father, he did not have the same parental situation as Gavin did so he'd hardly felt isolated. Honestly that many siblings sounded hectic anyway.

Gavin's question caught him off guard. It wasn't very often that on the first date he was asked if he wanted children, or in this case more children. He had thought about it actually, talked about it with Caleb briefly the other day. "Probably" he admitted. "I'm not sure I'd want a household as full as yours was growing up but I think I would like another child one day" he admitted. "Preferably in wedlock next time otherwise my father will kill me" he said with a small smile. "But...things don't always work out the way you want them to" he said with s shrug. "Like Galahad but I wouldn't trade him for the world. It'd be nice for him to have s sibling though, someone he can spend time with when I'm not about" incase he was on say a long quest.

He looked at Gavin curiously. "Would you give your child another G name or was Gabriel just s coincidence?" He asked in slight amusement. "Maybe I should start my own G dynasty, I've already got Galahad" he joked. Yeah he wasnt sure there was enough names to do that without stepping on their toes in the naming department. Lance opened the picnic basket, setting up the food for them. It was bird and berries with some accompaniments. He hoped she liked it but it's not like he'd cooked it, just swiped it from the kitchen. Lance then pulled out a bottle of wine although he wasn't sure Gavin drank so he had also brought some fruit drink. He poured himself a glass. "Would you like some or would you prefer something non-alcoholic?," He asked her. Maybe she wanted to keep her wits about her although Lance hardly planned on getting smashed, she could still be s threat after all and this would make a good opportunity for her to attack but he seemed fairly confident that either she wouldn't or that if she did, he could fend her off. On the other hand she might worry Lance had poisoned the other bottle or something but Lance wasn't like that and he hoped she knew that. "Can I just say that I'm glad you agreed to this" Lance told her. "I mean I don't really understand why you did" since she wasn't meant to like him at all and he'd seemed to upset her earlier on the horse. " But I like being in your company" he admitted. " And even when you're not around it's hard to get you out of my head," maybe he shouldn't be admitting that, although some of it was worry over what her plan was. "You know, in my younger days you could've probably gotten me to do anything with your looks and that brain, I would've been in over my head" maybe he still was.

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin didn't think she was much surprised by Lance's answer. He'd probable love to have a child with whoever he ended up with eventually. Though he seemed not to be up for as rowdy a household as Gavin had had when she was growing up. Lance though was soon questioning her naming choices and Gavin grinned. "I'm sorry, But the G's are taken. " She announced jokingly. He couldn't just steal there thing! But Gavin then shook her head. Telling him. "Gawain actually picked Gabriel's name. " It had made her wonder if Gawain might have been behind atleast a few of there siblings names! Gavin though did think further on the question though. "But, I doubt I'd stick with the theme. I think Agravain will carry on that tradition though. " She spoke with a roll of the eyes. She had a feeling he had a G name planned for this new child of his.

She then watched Lance pull out the bottle of wine. That made her hesitate briefly. Drinking might not be the best course of action here. This wasn't exactly a safe place. But after observing Lance for a moment she nodded. "I'll take a glass. " One drink wouldn't hurt, Hopefully. Reaching forward and taking her glass. Lance was soon continuing talk and his words, Once more caused a small blush to form on her face. Averting her gaze away from him.

Gavin then confessed to Lance. "I'm not sure why I agreed myself. " It was strange, Gavin could not deny the draw she had to him. Even if such was annoying. She then found herself smiling and musing. "You talk like your a old man. " His 'younger days' had not been so long ago Gavin thought. She then found herself focusing out over the water. Debating her words before she murmured. "I wish you were cruel, It... Would make things far less.. Confusing. " It was easier to hate someone that was horrible. But Lance wasn't. Perhaps it was a act, If it was. It was a mighty good one. Gavin then murmured. "I'm sorry about Antonio, Whatever my feelings about you. Kidnapping him had been crossing a line. Its not a excuse, But I just... I wanted you to feel the same thing we were feeling. And I wanted some sort of power in the situation. " Gavin shook her head. Murmuring. "I hate feeling powerless. " It was a feeling that had been heavy for aa long time. Gareth had been hurt, She was powerless to help him. She hadn't been there or able to help Gwen. Nor could she go and help rescue Gaheris. Maybe she hadn't been able to help them. But she had been able to make those she blamed hurt.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Lance smiled back. He was actually surprised to hear that Gawain had picked Gabriel's name, he'd expected it to be Gavin's choice or if not her husband's. He didn't see why Gawain would get a say although he did seem to be a mother hen. He could commiserate with the rolled eyes about Agravian, his naming choice was causing a bit of a stir which Lance did think was understandable but he wasn't sure it was possible to change his mind. Maybe Caleb would have a boy instead though, that'd help solve things.

She was agreeing to a glass of wine which was encouraging, made him feel like there was a little bit of trust in the air and that Gavin was letting herself relax slightly. Seemed they were both confused by their pull to each other, maybe if they spent more time together they could figure it out. His smile was soft as she said he talked like an old man. He felt like he'd grown quite a bit from his teenage years but maybe others, namely his father, would disagree.

His smile dimmed slightly as she started talking about the elephant in the room. He wasn't sure this was s good idea but well, it was hard to avoid. "I understand why you did it" Lance said. "But not my father was innocent, in fact he tends to disagree with a lot of what I do." It's not like Antonio was some sort of co-conspirator of his, no his father often thought him too prideful and not very responsible and sometimes just downright stupid. "But you took him away from my son and I get you're sorry now, and you can't change the past, but I still wish you'd left my father alone." He looked at her with soft and sad eyes. "I don't like to feel powerless either" he said. "But sometimes it can't be help. Some things are just out of our control" Like a horse carriage hurtling towards you. He reached forward to press a gentle hand against her arm, not sure how shed react but hoping it'd be comforting and going slow so she could stop him if she'd like. "Some events are unstoppable and so are some feelings, I certainly know that. It helps to talk to someone though, to get these things off your chest and your feelings and thoughts out into the open. It really makes it easier to carry" he insisted. He talked to Caleb or his father, Gavin seemed not to want to discuss things with her family though, not with the rift between them.

 

[Officer Newt]

The moment had become tense. No surprise really, But perhaps it was necessary. It was a subject that the two would probable need to confront eventually. Gavin found herself averting her gaze. She listened to him talk. Took in his words and thought quietly. Tensing slightly at his touch but soon enough relaxing. before she told him. "My families never been much for sharing our problems. " She mused, Gawain had often kept his problems secret. So did she. Perhaps it was this desire to spare their siblings from such troubles? Gavin wasn't sure, But recently it seemed as though much of there problems had begun surfacing.

Gavin then found herself confessing to Lance. "I was going to kill him. " Maybe that wasn't the right thing to say. But he probable could have guessed her plan. "I had decided when I captured him, That I'd kill him if Gareth died. I was stupid. He was innocent in all of that mess. And after I had him, When I was less angry. I realized that I couldn't release him. " There was no way she'd be able to free him without getting caught. She was going to kill a innocent man. That was a reality she had to face.
She'd only confessed when she knew she'd be caught. But... Even then she had come close to killing him. It would be easy to have her family leave then light the house on fire. Gavin doubted anything would have been left besides charred remains. Perhaps Gavin shouldn't repeat such ideas.

Gavin then shook her head. Mumbling. "I... Hurt people before. But only because they deserved it. No one was doing something about them. So I did. I don't feel guilty about them at all. Antonio's my only regret in all of that business. " She had little concern about confessing such to Lance. What was he going to do? Tell on her? Gavin was no so convinced anyone would believe him. And even if they did some doubt would likely lace there thoughts. Besides, If one dug enough there were no doubt rumors of what she had been up to. Lance probable had even heard a few of them. Gavin then found her gaze flickering down to her wine glass.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

"you don't say" Lance murmured. He could guess that the hadn't been sharing their problems by the tension between her and Agravain, by the way he'd felt how thin Gawain was but not heard talk about his health, by the way they were all so anxious to avoid showing any sort of weakness. They needed to stop keeping everything bottled up and instead trust in each other to help but he didn't think that was really likely to happen.

Lance adopted a grim grown as she started talking about killing his father but he didn't pull his hand away. He hadn't expected her to confess such a thing even if he'd suspected it. She was bringing the mood down a little but it would be hard to properly enjoy their date if they had too much on their chests. She could've released Antonio, she just hadn't wanted to face the consequences and she'd wanted to be free for when Lance for back so she could hurt him properly. Maybe she'd do that still though, by breaking his heart. Gavin overall didn't seem very apologetic though, she'd done terrible things but didn't regret them, believed in her own brand of justice and maybe it was grim but at least she was being truthful with him."I wish I had your conviction. It must be easier not to regret things but the people I've hurt and killed sometimes ways heavy on me" he told her.

Lance had helped his father on their travels and they had even been involved in a war but Lance couldn't necessarily see the justification for cutting down other men just because their kings we're having a tiff, he had been younger so eager to prove himself and ready to jump into battle but he wonders if it was really right to have fought for someone he hadn't truly believed in. "Killing someone is traumatising" Lance murmured. "Sometimes it's necessary but it does take its toll" left you wondering if there had been a better way or just weighed in your mind, how easy it was to actually leave this world. "Not giving it the respect it deserves can chip away at you if you're not careful, change who you are." He warned. "No one ever told me what those men had done which made you kill them. Was your justice true and did they deserve it?" He didn't know, just knew about the bodies and the cannibalism. And oh....would she have eaten Antonio? He hoped not, his father deserved more respect than that but it was a peculiar question to ask.

 

[Officer Newt]

Perhaps Lance was right, The deaths she caused should have perhaps weighed heavier on her. But it didn't, No. It gave her a sense of control. There was a thrill to it. Perhaps her murders had already changed who she was? Gavin knew she was not the same as before all this. She was not as weak. He then questioned her, And Gavin kept her eyes off him. Telling him. "Yes. They took advantage of others. Hurt people. They got away with it because they had rank or money. " Gavin had such too, Perhaps she could have openly accused them. It would have forced some sort of action to be taken. But Gavin wasn't sure how serious it would be taken. Maybe that was the excuse she told herself.

Gavin then told Lance. "The first time... I don't remember much of it. It was a house party. He was drunk, I walked in on him attempt to force himself on my servant. Its all a blur after that. But my husband helped me deal with the body after. " She then carefully pulled her legs close to her chest. Wrapping her arms around them. That first death had perhaps not been intentional. But the rest? They had been very much planned.

Gavin then told him. "I took my time with the others. Talked with my servants. I didn't just kill everyone there was a vague rumor about. I looked into it myself. Then I'd bait them into showing there colors. " Gavin had wanted proof. It was almost like a hunt. Searching for a trail. Gavin then said. "It was easy enough. Someone plays the part of a drunk pretty girl. If they tried anything. I'd have them red handed. " Gavin shrugged a little. As if the matter was simple. Many had not attempted anything. In such cases, Gavin simply had to let the trail go. But if they did? Well, They got to enjoy time in her cellar. Gavin then murmured. "I've killed seven men total. " Lance might have been expecting a higher number. But seven was still a lot. She'd have certainly have killed more if allowed her freedom.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Gavin didn’t regret what she’d done to those men and she was explaining to Lance why. He thought it might be…enlightening to hear it from her perspective and he’d not heard the full rendition anyway.These man had seemingly been predators, using their titles and wealth to prey on those without a position to protest and be heard. He could understand Gavin’s anger at that, the need to protect the innocent, especially those she felt she had a responsibility for. But…she didn’t seem to remember it a lot, that it was a blur, off considering she’d killed a man. He would’ve thought it’d be stark in her mind but emotions had clearly clouded Her recollection. He would be angry, but angry enough to see only red and not remember what you’d done properly? There was something else there, some trauma or story that he wasn’t privy to. And the way she pulled her legs to her chest? The first real discomfort she’d shown at the talk of her crimes.

She wasn’t just killing Willy nilly either, she did her research. This was planned out, thorough, premeditated murder. It couldn’t be healthy to obsess over such a thing. Seven? He had expected a higher number, especially if her husband had been involved but he guessed it did help explain his this had flown under rhe radar for so long. “No number of deaths is little” he told her gently. What did you really say to a murderer who had no repentance for their crimes? “They sounded like bad men” he agreed. “But it’s dangerous to become judge, jury and executioner“ he warned, “it’s too much power, too big a decision to really be shared by one person” even a king, but at least a sensible king listened fo his court.

”I wish I could say I’ve only killed seven men but my blade has seen more than that” he admitted. ”Sometimes it’s you or them, especially in war, and some were very bad men, but I didn’t enjoy killing them. I also know they won’t be the last people I kill. My job is violent by nature but it’s to protect the people. I understand you tried to do the same But it’s easy to lose perspective when you’re not being kept in check” he told her. “I’m glad you were caught, before these murders fully consumed you” he admitted. “I can tell you already think heavily about them, to put that planning in? To eat them? they're in your mind whether you like it or not. It’s good that they won’t take over any more of your life. It’s not healthy or wise. Focus on your daughter, your brothers and friends, hopefully this house arrest will end up helping you”

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin was not surprised to hear Lance talk of having killed. But he didn't seem to have the same thrill as her, The same bloodlust. Gavin supposed she should expect that. Because in the end, Gavin knew there was something wrong with her. Something wrong with all the siblings. Gavin then found herself confessing. "Truthfully, It...Wasn't to protect others. It was for me. " She could lie to herself, Say she was protecting others. perhaps that was a bit of it. But Gavin didn't just want that. She wanted the control it gave her. She wanted them to hurt. But in the end, They still weren't the men she wanted to hurt the most. No, Gavin had never sought those men out. It was a fear that kept her feet rooted in place. Kept her quiet.

Perhaps Lance was right, The murders likely had eaten at her for years. But they had given her a focus. Now she could do little but to think about herself and realize how hollow things felt. Her relationship with her brothers seemed to be in tattered. Her husband gone. All she had left was her daughter. But that was only with supervision. She had no one to blame for that but herself. Gavin then sighed. "I fear the house arrest has done little but to drive me stir crazy. " Suddenly leaning back so she was laying. Staring up at the stars. "Being out here with you certainly makes me feel like I've gone mad. " She didn't understand it. She didn't get the pull she had towards him. How he could leave her a blushing mess.

Gavin then found a certain bitter amusement crossing her face Musing. "But, I suppose you either have gone mad too, Or this is some well crafted ruse. " Because of course Lance had to realize the oddity of all this. This... Wasn't right. They should be yelling at eachother. Hate eachother. But all Gavin could muster were feelings that just left her even more confused. Finally Gavin drew her gaze towards him, Studying him. No, He had no deceit in his eyes. And while she could not trust him or find a way to forgive him. She did not hate him. It felt like such a betrayal to think that. It was wrong. She was sure all her siblings would agree with such. Likely if they knew about this little date she figured they'd never speak with her again. Agravain hated her already. So perhaps she was already burning those bridges. Swallowing. "I think we're both lonely. " Perhaps that wasn't all of what was between them. But it played a part. She had a feeling Lance was feeling such things. And to be honest? She had felt alone for a long time. Such feelings only worsened with the loss of her husband and her falling out with Agravain.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Gavin was heartbreakingly truthful and whilst maybe it was a bit alarming of disturbing, Lance did have to commend her honesty. Lots of people lied to themselves but it seemed Gavin wasn’t going to do that. Maybe best not to linger on it though. There was certainly another story there but Lance chose not to ask, knew they weren’t exactly close and didn’t want to upset her like he had earlier. No instead they were talking about the affect her arrest had had on her and he couldn’t blame her for being sick of locked up, even if she deserved it, he knew it must be difficult to cope without that sort of freedom to go and do what you wanted without permission. Still, she was far better off than most people would be if they’d committed her crimes.

He watched her lean back, tilting his head slightly as she spoke. Maybe they were both mad to be out here together but they seemed to share a curiosity about each other. So far things had been pleasant, hopefully they could stay that way. He smiled sadly at her as she talked about loneliness. He was lonely, even if he had Galahad and his father and his friends, he missed Caroline and he felt isolated as a father, with Elaine‘s mental state and Galahad’s current attitude towards him, most of his close friends were also off with Arthur, he’d had an argumenr either Galehaut before they’d split and obviously Gawain now hated him. He wasn’t exactly feeling surrounded by love even if he didn’t project it to the world. “We can be lonely together” Lance told her.

He sighed and laid down next to her, resting his head on his hand, elbow on the floor as he laid on his side, watching her. “I know it’s weird. I think you’re right that we might be slightly mad but I don’t think I can stop either. I….enjoy your company” he admitted. “Something I can’t explain draws me to you and its not healthy or smart or sane but I like when you agree to spend time with me, when you want me to spend time with you,“ he told her. “My father would say im just wanting what I can have, maybe he’s right, but that doesn’t make my feelings stop or make them any less valid” He watched her for a moment. She really was beautiful in the gentle light of the early night. The moon shone like it was just for them and he was feeling ridiculously bold again. “I’d like to kiss you” he told her. “If that’s alright with you? You tell me no and I’ll stop” he said, leaning closer. He realised he’d never asked her when he’d kissed her that time in the hallway but it had been heat of the moment and she’d seemed to enjoy it. This was gentler though, out here alone and after earlier, he wanted To put her at ease. Hopefully she’d say she’d like to be kissed but he certainly wasn’t going to force himself on her. The night was lovely with bright stars, a gentle lake and even lazy fireflies now out lighting up their little refuge under the tree, but Lance only had eyes for her. The moon and the stars might be great, but he looked at her liked she’d hung them there. What was the sky to a goddess? Something about the way she looked soft there, less sharp edges than in the castle, more unarmed openness, he was enjoying it and would like to bask in it. God he hoped she let him kiss her.

 

[Officer Newt]

Lonely together, It was a strange thought. Enticing in a way. The two were certainly a strange pair! Lance was soon laying back beside her. His words feeling very much like a echo of her own feelings. That draw. She understood that. Thus, She was soon rolling onto her side as to face him as he talked. This close, Things felt far more intimate and soon enough Lance's words were causing a blush to form on her face. He seemed to do that a lot. Make her flustered. Such was a feat few men were capable of but Lance seemed to find it easy. But she decided to answer his question without words. Closing the small distance between them and gently kissing him. This was.. Softer then before. Sweeter. No tears or anger lingered in the air.

Gavin soon realized she liked the closeness. It was comfortable. Perhaps she should have been on higher alert. Lance was dangerous afterall. But Gavin didn't think she needed to fear him in the moment. He would have attacked her far sooner had such been his intentions. No, He wasn't going to hurt her. Not tonight. So she enjoyed the kiss. Eventually breaking the kiss though she did not move far from him. Looking up at him and suddenly Gavin wondered if they had spoken before the incident with Gareth. Would that draw still be there? Sure, Gavin had seen Lance before. He trained often enough with her brothers. But she had never approached him nor took much notice. Her brothers trained with plenty of famous knights afterall.

Gavin then found herself murmuring. " I think... Whatever this is. I'd like it to continue." She confessed. Though to be honest she didn't know what this was. Them dating was perhaps a bit too strong of a word. There was too much distance between them for that. But this was technically a date. Gavin suddenly found herself feeling a bit embarrassed at the thought. She felt like she needed to say more. The proper words were hard for her to find though. "This is nice. " Was all she could manage.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

The blush was an encouraging sign and soon his question was being answered with actions rather than words. The kiss was soft and delicious and he made sure to keep it that way as he returned it. The slow tenderness of it had been a change but it had been a nice change, gave them more time to enjoy it and really feel the draw between them, that it was something over than lust or confused anger. Lance was tempted to rest a hand on her hip, eager to touch her but refrained, again unsure of which movements might set her off. He didn't think want to ruin their wonderful night.

Maybe they would've been this attracted to each other had they spoken before hand, Gavin was certainly beautiful so would've caught his attention to say the least but Gavin was also Gawain's sister, it was likely that he would've been warned to stay away. Doesn't mean that would've stopped him but would have at least made him hesitate. He wouldn't have wanted to betray his friend. He didn't really have to worry about that any more seeing as Gawain hated him now.

He smiled softly as she said she'd like this to continue. He reached out a gentle hand, slow again so she could stop him and brushed her cheek. He just couldn't help but want to touch her. There was too much distance between them even though they were close together. He wanted to wrap her up in arms, her head on his chest and watch the stars, listen to the lake and forget about their troubles for a while. "I'd like that too" he agreed. He leaned in again for another kiss, not able to resist her for long but this kiss was kept a bit shorter. "Would you like to go horse riding tomorrow?" He asked. "I can say we're going to see your brothers again" he suggested although maybe it was stupid to not let anyone know where she was whilst giving her a horse she could use to escape. But they could always ride together although again that hadn't turned out great this morning but Lance knew at least one thing to avoid now. "Id love to take you dancing" he admitted. "But the town is always crawling with knights" and it'd be hard to dance with her if he also had to make the music. He wasn't exactly scared of embarrassed to be seen with her but he knew they'd be questioned and their moments ruined. Maybe they could go further out to another town? Two dates in two days might be too much for her though, Lance was just eager, he enjoyed her company God forgive him and he knew he'd be thinking about her anyway.

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin couldn't help the flustered feeling that washed over her as she felt Lance's touch. Half wanting to hide her face, But she couldn't bring herself to do such. To busy admiring Lance and well, It was strange the way he looked at her. The affection was clear, Were such emotions obvious on her own face? He... Wanted this, Whatever this was. And then his lips were back on hers and she enjoyed the moment. Amusement crossing her face as Lance seemed to propose another date. Horse riding, It was a nice thought. Time away from the castle would certainly be nice. But it was dangerous, If the king realized she was gone and wasn't with her brothers? Well, Things could get ugly real fast.

She soon grinned at the mention of dancing. She'd be lying if she said she didn't find the idea enticing. Seeming to consider things for a moment. Before saying. "I hardly think it would be that difficult to keep my identity hidden. " Gavin had snuck around plenty before. All she'd really need to do would be dress down. Maybe a hood if she was feeling really mysterious. Besides, Who'd expect Lance to be dancing with Gavin? They'd certainly think they saw wrong if they did take notice! But, Gavin wasn't certain she was willing to take the risk. Though the idea was thrilling. Perhaps the danger added to the enticing nature of it?

Gavin then said. "But... If you're willing. I have a idea of where we could go. Its not too far from my family home. " Was anyone even living in that old house anymore? Gavin doubted it, Maybe a few servants lingered but that was likely all. Perhaps a good thing. Dark memories lingered in those halls, But, Also plenty of good ones. It was certainly a mixture of emotions! Gavin though preferred the places a bit further out. In the woods, There memories are nothing but ones of play. She need not think of the horror her parents would inflict on them. Gavin then further explained. "Theres a spot there I used to like when I was little. Besides, I'll be sure to tell you plenty of embarrassing stories about my brothers while we're there. " She snickered. She knew plenty of course, Though she was sure her brothers would not appreciate her telling such things!

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Lance didn’t plan on the king finding it. Of course it was possible, but the man had just had a baby born, he might not care for such trivial matters and many wouldn’t want to disturb him to check things. Also, the siblings stuck together, maybe not anymore or at least not as much but if the king should hear about it then he might figure that Agravain would cover for Gavin anyway and there was no point asking. Anyway, it probably wouldn’t come to that, but the more they snuck out then the more likely they were to be caught by someone. They’d need to think up something, or maybe Gavin should ask the king for one day a week ro visit her brothers or something and Lance could spend time with her then.

Maybe Gavin wouldn’t be recognised but she was rather beautiful, he imagined she might catch a lot of men’s attention if she wasn‘t well disguised. In the future then he figured they could go dancing, although how much of a future did they have? He didn’t really know but best to be optimistic about such things. He smiled gently as she talked about the spot and stories of her brothers; that would be nice but it was possible it could end badly if they lingered on Gareth too long. “That sounds nice” he agreed, “and I’d love to hear stories about you and your brothers” he admitted. He’d heard stories from Gawain but it‘s not like Gawain was going to say too many embarrassing things about himself. He’d also never seen their family home, despite being Gawain’s friend, he just knew there had been trouble there for them in the childhood snd not much more Although Some things had become a bit clearer over time.

”I’ll pick you up just before lunch” he told her, gave Him time to get Galahad settled with someone and before all the knights were milling About for food, instead most of them should be too busy training or doing jobs. “I imagine there’s enough horses for us to have one each, unless you’d like to share again.“ he offered with a disarming smile. Maybe it’d go better this time. “and I’ll take you dancing another time” he promised. “Maybe at the next town over. It’s a Little bit further away but they do the best honey mead and the music is good” He may not go on quests but he didn’t spend all his time at the castle, he liked to explore the area. He sat up slightly, resting on his elbows and looking at the lake. “You know on really hot days, sometimes we give up training and go swimming in the lake” he said, some of which was skinny dipping, depended on the situation. “Gawain never joined us though” he mused. “I reckon he would’ve gotten pushed in if he hadn’t stayed so far away either, and if people didn’t want to risk annoying both Gawain and Agravain. I take it out of the two of them, Agravain would’ve taught you to swim?” Although maybe she didn’t know but surely she must, right?

 

[Officer Newt]

Well, It seemed the two had another date planned. Gavin would certainly have a list of all the embarrassing things her brothers got up to ready! He then was talking about them riding a horse together and Gavin couldn't help but feel a bit embarrassed. She knew very her actions must have seemed rather extreme. It was a lack of control Gavin had not liked, No, Best she ride on her own horse this time. Lance seemed not to worry to much about such things. Talking about further dates in the future and Gavin couldn't help but snicker a little. "My, Things certainly are moving fast. Two dates already planned?" She teased. Watching him as he sat up and she followed his gaze. Her expression turning a bit more thoughtful at his words.

Gavin then told Lance. "I'm not surprised, Gawain's afraid of water. " She had heard rumors from the staff of why. Had taken notice of the fear over the years. But it was never something she had directly asked Gawain about. Though Gavin figured if she had he'd have simply brushed her off. She then smiled slightly. "Mm, Yeah. A little. Though we never went swimming that much. So I'm afraid my swimming skills are not that great. " She could swim! Just not that well. Growing up and considering Gawain's fear of water. Going to a pond or lake wasn't really in the question. Occasionally though when he was gone away they'd go out with Agravain.

Gavin's expression was fond as she thought back to such times. Musing. "God, You should have seen it when it was only Agravain watching us. He did his best, But it was a mess. " Agravain didn't exactly have eyes in the back of his head afterall! And some of them had been rather mischievous. "Last time I remember when we all went to a pond... I think I would have been about ten. " So, A good while back. Gavin was then grinning. "Me and Gwen were arguing on the beach, Because Gwen had gotten the bright idea to play knights, Pick up a stick. Walk over, Then whack me with. While all this was happening. Little Gareth had tripped while playing in the water, And I guess got water up his nose or something because he was wailing." Gareth had often cried when he was small. So that was hardly odd. "Poor Agravain was struggling to calm him down while keeping me and Gwyn from murdering eachother. " Such probable hadn't been the easiest of tasks.

The thought made a certain tension build in her chest. Sitting up. She found very much she missed those times. Missed relying on Agravain. But it also made her remember. Agravain and Gawain had been children themselves. Back then, Agravain had seemed so much older and more mature then them. His huge size only added to that belief. But he would have only been a teenager. Did he resent them for that? He couldn't have had much of a childhood taking care of them. Maybe they were something he'd rather forget. Could Gavin really blame him for that? Gavin was a grown woman. She didn't need his support.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

They did had two dates planned but Gavin was hardly discouraging him so he took her words good-naturedly. Perhaps it was a lot to plan so quickly but Lance knew he’d be going crazy thinking about when he’d next see her and also worrying she might change her mind and ….well not chicken out but decide to let things drift into nothingness if they had nothing solid planned. No, best to ensure she knew he wanted to spend time with her and schedule in some dates whilst he still could.

Lance wasnt overly surprised by Gawain’s fear of water, it actually made a lot of sense when he looked back at all they had and hadn’t done, but he was surprised he hadn’t known that. Some friend he was! Sorry, ex-friend. And that still stung, maybe part of the reason he enjoyed Gavin’s company So much, he was used to their family. Not all of them though and they truly did sound like a nightmare. To try and look after that many kids? And when you were a kid yourself? He wasn’t sure he’d be able to do it. He might not like Agravain but he did have to commend his parenting skills somewhat. If she was only ten at the time then it had been quite a while since she’d seemingly gone swimming. “Don’t worry, I can help refresh your skills” he offered, although maybe skinny dipping was a bit much for at the moment but they didn't Have to be naked to swim.

Agravain himself couldn’t have been that old at the time, maybe thirteen or fourteen, really still a kid himself whereas the absent Gawain would've been a more reasonable age at about sixteen or seventeen. Even so, they didn’t seem old enough to be wrangling that many children let alone basically completely raising them. “Looking at Agravain, you wouldn’t think he was that hands on” he mused. “Was he good at looking after you all? I figure it must have been tough, I find it hard enough with just Galahad but he had, what? Four of you? And he was only a child himself” yeah, Agravain hadn’t had much time for a childhood, not that it was really his siblings’ faults, but he did find it annoying that Gavin now has the audacity to think he did nothing for her. But resent them? No, Agravain loved his siblings, it was their parents he blamed and rightfully so.

“did you have a lot of fun days out?” He asked. “I imagine it must have been difficult once Gawain and Agravain started training to be knights, but at least They got to keep Gaheris under their wing” although it hadn’t seemed to do the boy much good. He paused, he didn’t really want to sour the mood but he felt he had to talk to her about it, Gaheris didn’t seem like he’d listen to Agravain. “I’m worried about Gaheris” he told her. “I’ll be honest that I’ve never found him the most pleasant but I’ve always mainly put that down to the fact he’s a teenager with an attitude. But this trip….after your sister…. He’s not okay” he said. “He’s going to get himself hurt. And he’s a danger to Ruth, I don’t know if you met her, but also Caleb, he hated her enough before, but now she’s married to Agravain and pregnant? He’s not taking it well. And Agravain is.…well Agravain, he’s not exactly soft with his words and even if we’re not friends, I trust him to protect Caleb, I just don’t want to know what Gaheris might try.“ he explained. “I know it’s not something you want to hear and i Wish I didn’t have to tell you but you might be the only one that can get Through to him. He seems to be all bitterness and anger as of late and he’s been….forceful with Ruth. I’ve stood in the way as much as I can, and Caleb has promised to do the same, but that’s treating the symptoms, not the disease. Someone needs to explain to him that’s it’s not okay to act that way and he’s certainly not going to listen to me”

 

[Officer Newt]

Gavin looked to Lance at the question. Considering it for a moment before musing. "He was. It helped that we all normally listened to him. Well, Everyone besides Gwen. She hated getting told what to do. " Agravain had always been more the stern parent. Could be certainly intimidating when he wanted to be! Things were best though when Gawain and Agravain were together. Sadly there were times when one was busy training or questing. But Gawain seemed good at arranging times so someone would always be there for the others. No doubt fearing what might happen should they leave them all alone. Gavin then mused. "Yes, Gawain didn't much like staying at home. Always complained it was too stuffy inside. So we often went out on little adventures. " Now, Gavin figured the reason was because Gawain wanted to avoid there parents. Gavin didn't blame him. But he'd never let the kids know that when they were small.

Gavin went quiet though when Gaheris was brought up. But she didn't interrupt. Simply listened. Before she looked forward towards the pond. She didn't get angry though. Instead murmuring. "Of course he's not okay. He lost practically his twin. He feels like Agravain has moved on without us and who knows what all those slavers did to him! " Gavin though shook her head. While she wasn't completely sure how serious to take Lance's claim. Some of his words did line up close to what Gaheris had already said. Thus it did not come that much as a shock to her. Soon musing. "He already told me he... Hasn't treated Ruth the best. I talked with him, And he... Seemed willing to try to be better. " It was more progress then anyone else probable had made with him in the last few months.

Gavin then told Lance. "What he needs, Is to get out of that house. Things with Agravain are.. Tense with all of us. But Agravain's temper isn't going to help Gaheris. Not to mention Agravain's focus is going to be on Caleb for sometime. " Even ignore Gavin's feelings regarding Agravain. Assuming he still cared for them. She did not think Agravain would be much help for Gaheris. The two men were just too confrontational. Gavin then murmured. "But truthfully, I... Don't know how else to help him. Gawain's better at this then any of us. But even he can't heal those kinds of scars. " Gawain was still facing his own demons. Gavin had hers too that she'd been unable to heal. While she thought she could help Gaheris. She did not think she'd be able to cure him.

 

[British. Intelligence.]

Agravain was not the sort of person you wanted to disobey, he was bark and bite and he figured for a bunch of children he could’ve been quite scary. Luckily Gawain had been there a lot of the time to balance him out, he seemed more forgiving and gentle with his siblings. And it was nice that the two brothers managed to get their family away from their parents for a lot of the time, although it hadn’t stopped them causing damage but had likely helped minimise it.

He watched her as she talked about Gaheris, he had heard she’d been close to Gwen but it seemed he’d been the closest to her. It must’ve been very hard, certainly traumatising, to have her die and in those horrible circumstances? He didn’t expect the boy to be doing alright but it didn’t give him an excuse to treat others horribly. Gavin seemed to think he might get A bit better towards Ruth though, Lance was dubious, he didn’t trust Gaheris like that, but he didn’t say anything, just nodded. Hopefully it was the truth though and Gaheris would become more tolerable and less vicious towards everyone, but especially Ruth.

Maybe she was right about him and Agravain, he could see how the two might clash but Gaheris did not need to be on his own right now. Gaheris did seem jealous though of the attention Caleb was getting from his brother, probably wanted all his focus, especially seeing as he had just been kidnapped and away for ages. Agravain could probably spend some more time with Gaheris, he could talk to Caleb about that but he didn’t really want to stress her out too much at this stage or put too much on her plate, she had quite a lot to deal with already.

”that’s A lot of pressure to put on Gawain” he commented, he knew that Gawain loved his siblings but he was just one man, not a magical mystery cure. “From what I’ve heard, Gaheris seems to be under the impression that no one loves him any more. Maybe you could talk to:the king about visiting him every week or something? I think it might help if he had someone reaching out to be with him, consistently, to know that people do want to spend time with him and he’s not immediately been forgotten now that he’s back” Lance didn't have all the answers but he might be able to help a little bit. “I personally don’t think it’s wise for him to move out, to live isolated, but it might be good for him to have some outings, rather than be cooped up all day. He doesn’t really have any friends though, the other knights and squires always found him a bit…sour and obnoxious, he had an attitude before all this, I don’t know if anyone will really hang out with him” he admitted.