Other How much toxicity can you live with in a community?

[LostHero]

lmao XD

Yeah I try to avoid it like a pitfall but like a hellfire anti tank missile it just hunts me down.. With the vengeance... And people out there wonder why some people like to drink

 

[LostHero]

Humanity has always been messed up towards me. Always.... But I just try and be the stronger person. No matter how many haters try and bring me down. No matter how garbage the people I try and role-play with are. No matter how alone I am. I'll still strive foe better ends

 

[Rwa96]

I do my best to interact at arm's length if there's any kind of nonsense taking place. I already deal with IRL stuff as it is, I don't wanna deal with online drama.

 

[Daisie]

Ditto to the above, lol. On the internet, it's important to remember that it's easier than ever to turn around and walk away. Far, far easier than it is in real life.

I think it's also important to remember that we tend to have difficulty imagining more than one person at a time. So when we talk about a "community", instead of talking about thousands of individuals, we like to try and mash every single member of that community into one big generalization. We create this weird, amorphous entity, that we can then blame for everything we come across. "Ugh, this COMMUNITY is just so toxic!"

But a community isn't a singular entity. A community is many, MANY smaller entities, all with their own traits and personalities. Unless the focus of the community is EXTREMELY specific, you're going to get an incredible diversity of personalities. Someone could be an active member of a community for years and happen to have very minimal contact with any individual who is considered toxic. To them, the community is fine. Most folks on RpN, for example, probably never participate in the discussion boards beyond a handful of posts - there's an entire side to the RpN community that they don't really know. And we don't know them, either.

This applies a little less with smaller communities, like clubs or groups with fewer numbers, but with sprawling online communities with thousands of members online at any given time, it approaches impossible for all (or even most) of them to be manipulative or toxic.

I feel like as long as you have the ability to avoid particular problematic members (which again, is easier than ever online), you can really make yourself at home in ANY large community, because there's really always bound to be SOME good people. Always some good experience to be had.

Pretentious thought-spewing over! Enjoy your community.

 

[LostHero]

I'm perfectly aware its easy to ignore some dickhead online but In my experience here so far. Sometimes you just got to take whatever second rate RP partner you can find... Been a joke trying to find worth while RP friends so far.

 

[AutumnLilac]

I have a pretty low toxicity threshold. For me—and this is just a personal line, obviously —if I'm in a community and they spend almost as much time complaining about the thing we're all fans of as they do anything else, it's just too much for me. I'm a massive Zelda fangirl, but I can only hang out on the subreddit for like six months after a game releases. At that point, it suddenly becomes "X is actually overrated" constantly until the next game comes out, then people look back on it fondly again.

I just wish I could enjoy things without people telling me "actually, that thing is bad" lmao

 

[StrawberryAvalanche]

I actually just left Tumblr due to the amount of infighting and how terrible it's become. I had over 5,000 people on there blocked for my own safety and peace of mind. But after getting hate messages daily just because, I said enough and left. I was on Tumblr since 2012 so it's a big deal for me to lose something like that. But fandom became too stressful, and fandom is meant to be fun and not a pain in the neck. So I packed up and left. My blog is still there in case I ever go back but for now I'm long gone.

 

[Hirquitickitty]

I actually just left Tumblr due to the amount of infighting and how terrible it's become. I had over 5,000 people on there blocked for my own safety and peace of mind. But after getting hate messages daily just because, I said enough and left. I was on Tumblr since 2012 so it's a big deal for me to lose something like that. But fandom became too stressful, and fandom is meant to be fun and not a pain in the neck. So I packed up and left. My blog is still there in case I ever go back but for now I'm long gone.

I've had an opposite experience actually, every other social media platform seems so ridiculously wrapped up in random drama and cancellations and etc etc that it's overwhelming to even stay on the platforms. I'm looking to twitter, instagram and discord (if it even counts here) specifically. Tumblr seems so distant from all of that. It's p chill. I just post my silly little drawings and chit chat w people occasionally. To be fair, I'm not in one specific fandom really because I don't like fandom culture but idk. Sorry it got ruined for you 3:

 

[TwistedEverAfter]

I have no tolerance for toxicity, and that's genuine toxicity where it's detrimental to my mental, emotional, and physical health. If something is genuinely toxic, then I'm out.

I was a part of the Hetalia fandom from, like, maybe 2008 for a good number of years. Well over a decade, I'd say. Many people say that the Hetalia fandom was toxic, and it really was, but I just stayed away from that side of it. Thankfully my OTP was one where I could just sit in my little bubble and chill, but even then, we had dramas and headaches that bled in. Especially on Tumblr. I just created a happy bubble, avoided drama, stayed positive, and it was okay for me. But yeah, there was some vicious things happening that is beyond just pairing wars, at least on Tumblr. It got nasty and I had to block certain pairings so that I didn't see any of that nonsense reblogged by somebody I was following.

I'm online to RP and write fanfics to escape offline world chaos and stresses and the mundane and what not. The only chaos I want is when I control it in my writing and it's 100% fake. If it's real drama, nah, it's not worth it. I'll always find another RP or space to enjoy my fandoms. Not sure how Tumblr is behaving now, as it's been a hot minute since I've been on there due to a mental health issue (unrelated to the website), but I'm almost worried to return. Curious, of course, but my fandoms have also changed and grown, so I'm not sure what it would even be like there now. Especially after all the changes I heard happened.

 

[Gryphon3707]

A healthy amount

 

[SureFire]

Almost none, I avoid it even if that means leaving.

 

[Paper Darling]

None.

I have grown to become someone who does not allow any unacceptable behaviour, in a situation that can be controlled but isn't being controlled. I want to be able to enjoy myself as much as I can, and if someone invades that level of enjoyment with toxicity, I shut them down or I leave.

It has however left me extremely cautious about joining any community, rp related or not. Because there is always something bound to happen, and there may not always be an authoritative figure to take care of it appropriately.

 

[autumnredemptions]

if it gets to twitter levels of toxic I'm normally dipping by then

 

[Hearts]

If it's "serious" toxicity that's mentally wearing me out, I'm done. Not even going to think twice. lol.

 

[Nokumi]

wrong chat

 

[StuartAnderson]

very little.
I can't be bothered. I work full-time, study, have other responsibilities. I don't want more drama (I work in mental health, I have enough in the day, thank you!)

and my threshold gets lower with every passing year, because i'm more self-confident (and busier) so i;m more protective of my time and energy. I shouldn't have to put up with toxic behaviour because I want to write with others. If people can't be civil, i'll go and find people who are. roleplaying is my hobby, it's fun, it's relaxing. i'm not going to lose it because of toxicity.

 

[StuartAnderson]

A big one for me is when it ooc drama leaks into the roleplay or vice versa.
when someone who doesn't like someone ooc and it affects the roleplay or someone does something they don't like in the rp so have a go at them ooc.
big nope for me

 

[RedArmyShogun]

Depends how you define "toxic" there are more than a few things in modern culture and some users on this site that I don't like at all, but I roll with the punches when need be and make it pretty clear where I stand in regard to them. I don't consider arguing to be toxic, viewpoints *will* clash, but I've been online since some 22 years ago. Been in communities and still in a few of them that that would just horrify some users, I'm sure. Be it the likes of the Chans, Steam Comments, etc. I even at times play PVP games and those, every single last one of them are what I would define as toxic, invoking of rage and disappointment, or a community who's views and standards are too far removed from your own. In which case you are better off leaving than trying to subvert and take it over.

However, just as you disagree with me doesn't mean I'll throw you off the bus. In fact there are a couple of people I RP with that I have heated disagreements with in ooc's every single time, that I invite to the next RP because they are good rp'ers. There will always be differences in others, what matters is how far you are willing to take live and let live, or how far out of your bubble you will go.

Way too many people take stuff personally and cannot separate ooc from IC, those people, I make a point to not RP with them, and people that flake or constantly do low effort rp's, that turns me away more often, unless the culture of the group is one I don't care to be part of. So yeah, I got thick skin, and I'll let you know mighty quick like what I think about something, more so if its something I don't like.

 

[Len Auphydas]

I find pretty much all places too toxic for me. It becomes a bit of a balancing act between "I literally have to talk to someone at some point, complete isolation is rather mind numbing", but also I find most places of discourse to be disturbing or revolting. Really, my tolerance might be too much, because I have a bad habit of reading things that I know are more than likely to just aggravate me (like youtube comments). So with me its kind of a constant effort to find wherever is the least objectionable place I can spend my time and interact.

I do however make an active effort to avoid people talking about the things I'm most passionate and care most about. I really don't want my views or thoughts to be poisoned by others cynicism and perversity. So ironically, I tend to primarily engage in communities about things I dont care about nearly as much, because its safer that way.

Other peoples words can kinda mess me up and ruin my day and it happens pretty frequently, so, I gotta be as cautious as I can.

Of course, finding a community where I just... like everyone and get along just dandy is nice and all in theory, but I'm a bit too niche in interests and views for that, and communities that are super super against any disagreements tend to give me the boot because, well, as much restraint as I'm capable of showing its a little hard to hide all of my feelings while still interacting with people. Especially when behavior I consider offensive or reprehensible is often just viewed as the norm or even encouraged.

 

[Benadryl Plankton]

I like to think I have a pretty high tolerance for all manners of toxic bullshit, so I am willing to weather an uncomfortable amount just for the sake of taking part in something that I enjoy. Still, I can definitely see the wisdom in getting the fuck outta dodge early.

 

[Manchae]

I love banter and can respect healthy discourse but, when you hate just to hate and relish in the reactions, I'm outta there. Don't need that negativity in my life!