Other How much toxicity can you live with in a community?

[Rekai Leon]

Many of us would love to be in a perfect community where everyone is nice and kind. Unfortunately, such thing does not exist, and I doubt that it ever will. No matter where we are in, regardless of how nice it seems to be, there are poorly behaved people lurking around, waiting to ruin our day, or do something even worse. There are measures that we can take to minimize the chance that such incident occurs, or the negative impact if it happens, but the probability can never be zero. Bad things often happen at a moment, and in a way we least expect, and that is just a risk we have to deal with while being a member of any community.

What I would like to ask is: How much toxicity can you live with in a community? Here are my thoughts:

Livable: I rarely encounter toxic behavior (for example: once or at most twice a week). They are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, do not promote any toxic behavior and will take actions against it.

Borderline cases: I encounter toxic behavior very often (for example: almost everyday). Fortunately, they are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, responsive and trustworthy. There are just too many toxic members for them to deal with. For such communities, I will take actions on a case by case basis. If that community holds significant value to me, I will stay but I will minimize interactions with strangers whenever possible until the problems are mitigated. If possible, I will work with the staffs to resolve the issues that the community is having. If it is just a casual community, I will just move on.

Absolute deal-breaker: There are risks to one's safety and well-being and/ or staffs are unhelpful and untrustworthy and/ or toxic behavior is endorsed or promoted. This is the kind of community that I would stay away at all cost. If I need something from that community, I will seek alternatives whenever possible. If there are absolutely no alternatives whatsoever, I will take extreme measures to make sure that I am safe there. I will just come in, get whatever I need, and leave while drawing as little attention as possible. I am not going to try being a hero and saving that community from its downfall, because I do not have the bravery or what else it takes to do so. I know that there are people who do so. I really appreciate what they are trying to do, and they have my respect. It is just that I am not one of them.

 

[Kylesar1]

None. I gatekeep and gatekeep hard. This is why I try to create and cultivate my own spaces. I don't argue with these people. I just boot them out of my spaces and ignore external toxicity.

I don't let a toxic community influence my enjoyment of something. For example, I like MHA but the fandom is notoriously toxic, which is why I let them argue about their dogshit ships outside of my spaces. For the most part, it just means not looking for community on Twitter. Since the pornpocalypse on Tumblr, most of these porn-addicted toxic people moved to Twitter, ironically making Tumblr much less toxic but taking toxicity into the mainstream

I have passions that I don't want watered down for these people. If you can hang, please do. We're not lowering the standard though. If you want to argue that Celeste is liberal propaganda because there was a pride and trans flag in a cup at Madeline's computer desk in an end-level art of DLC, go argue about it somewhere else. If you want to argue that Redo of Healer shouldn't exist because rape culture and patriarchy and whatever else, go argue somewhere else. If you want to give death threats to people because they ship Deku with Ochako instead of Bakugo, go do it somewhere else. If you want to call people pedophiles because you can't fathom that a grown woman can be both short and have big breasts, go argue somewhere else. If you want to call people fat greasy losers because they enjoy dating sim games or vocaloids or hentai games or like certain types of entertainment, go do it somewhere else. If you want to call people incels because they like Redo of Healer (which ironically has a heavy female fanbase), go do it somewhere else. If you want to compare orcs to black people, take your racist ass somewhere else. If you want to argue that people should be allowed to use the hard R and that not liking it makes you an SJW, go spout slurs somewhere else. If you want to send people death threats because they didn't make your ship canon, or they played a character you didn't like, you're not doing it in my spaces. If you want to argue that people shouldn't be allowed to voice/play a character that isn't exactly like them, go argue somewhere else. If you want to argue that men shouldn't be able to enjoy whoever the fuck because they're a lesbian, go argue somewhere else. If you want to fight about "lesbian erasure" because someone shipped a fictional lesbian with a fictional dude, go fight somewhere else. If you want to call people homophobes and bigots because they didn't like how a straight character was suddenly turned gay, do it somewhere else. If you want to bitch about how YOU aren't represented in shit you didn't create, go bitch somewhere else. If you want to argue about who is an alpha male and who is a beta male, go be alpha males somewhere else.

There is no point in arguing with these people. They are unhinged, they can't be reasoned with. Boot them out and move on. Too many spaces put up with toxicity. If you bring this stuff to the attentions of mods and admins, and they do nothing, that space will collapse soon. Move on

The moment something goes mainstream is the moment all of the posers and fake fans infiltrate and try to change things and impose THEIR will on the space, and these spaces are so happy being popular that they allow toxicity because they don't want to not be popular anymore

 

[cocacola]

i'm someone who has dwelled in the darkest parts of the internet for many, many years.

hetalia. danganronpa. fnaf. vtubing. art drama youtube. homestuck.

those could send a shive up anyone's spines! but being as it may, i never really saw a lot of toxicity in those fandoms even though its very much known that they are.. less than amicable sometimes. honestly if you want my opinion, if youre seeing the toxic parts of your fandom a lot, thats on you. a lot of the times its pretty easy to avoid. just pay attention to yourself. there are times where they come to you, but often times youre going to them subconsciously. if a fandom is big, it's going to have a toxic fanbase. thats just how it goes most of the time. honestly its an internet rule, just like *34.

 

[Tahira]

Toxicity is a word that has been abused. Some have commandeered it to imply any disagreement=Toxicity. I would surmise that some are not used to the confrontations necessary to procure a healthy relationship and an understanding of one another. Now concerning how much is too much? When it becomes the driving force of activity for a period of time.

 

[GojiBean]

If we're talking about genuine toxicity and not just heated arguments where the word "toxic" is thrown around willy nilly, then I agree with Kylesar1 in that I don't tolerate any toxicity in the spaces I occupy.

I'm 32, irl, and I'm more than comfortable with putting down that behavior the moment it rears its ugly head. Toxic behaviors that I stamp out right away, whether I'm the GM or not, include the following:

* Manipulative Behavior - For example, asking others to change a few "tiny" details in their post because either you or "someone else" might want to reply a certain way to other things that happened. This kind of behavior may seem harmless on the surface. But it's not. They're trying to change the natural flow of the RP and the story of a character that's not their own to better suit their own personal narrative and gain personal satisfaction even if it comes at the detriment of the other player and their character. Life in and out of the RP is all about them. And this is toxic at its core.

* Constant Arguments With No Resolution - When you know you're in the right and have been arguing with someone who's obviously wrong but won't admit it, and you never get an apology or even a passing acknowledgement from the other person that they know they were in the wrong, that's toxicity. They can't admit they were wrong. They can't admit they stepped over the line. And really it's not that they can't. It's that they won't. When someone refuses to acknowledge their missteps and faults not because of an inability but an unwillingness to do so, they can only ever be labeled as toxic.

* Constant Attacks - Whether simply verbal, or if it ventures into the psychological, toxic people will always attack others and put them on the defensive. For example, if you've ever been in an RP with someone who randomly "jokes" about something you did in a post, but it's obviously an insult despite their insistence on it being a "joke," that's an attack. They're attacking your writing. They're attacking your character. They're attacking you. And when you speak up to defend your decisions and writing style they just laugh you off and pretend that the whole thing was "nothing," and just another "joke." Attacking others and playing it off as innocence in hopes of getting away with it. This is toxicity at its core as well.

There are other smaller behaviors that I look for and stamp out immediately as well if I see them pop up. But these are the big three. Any time I see someone doing any of the above, even if it's coming from them GM themselves, I call it out publicly and immediately because I won't let it slip through any cracks to either spread or get worse.

I know that a toxic-free community is impossible because toxic behaviors are part of the human condition. But just like Kylesar1 said I will go out of my way to gatekeep pretty hard and do my best to at least keep my little sections of the community where I communicate and role-play with others toxicity free.

Cheers!

~ GojiBean

 

[GOREPHIC]

Not very much, unfortunately

 

[Malphaestus]

I can handle any space which can handle me, and therefore the only one which I cannot manage is any which does not allow common understanding: open-mindedness.

 

[Jannah]

What exactly are we defining as toxicity here?

 

[Celestial Water]

Jannah That’s up to you to decide. A few people have listed in their posts what they consider toxic. You can only go off of your own definition of your experiences of toxicity of whatever past or current communities you’ve been in.

 

[Steve Jobs]

 

[Edric Blight]

 

[Celestial Water]

 

[Cassiopeia]

it depends on how involved i am with the community. if i'm super involved? not much. if i'm not-so-involved? i could not care less

 

[StarletDream]

I'm not sure how to word the amount: I know quite a few fandoms I've loved have turned toxic. Hetalia was one, but, I happened to lose interest in the anime over all when it did. The only real instance I have of it, is with Genshin Impact on Twitter at least. It was really sad to see to because when the game first came out that little corner of it was just wholesome, and, jokingly worshiping Xiao because of a leaked cutscene. Then out of nowhere (for me because I don't keep up with things lmao.) it turned into well, a Twitter community. The typical toxic one. It wasn't even a little bit at a time, but just a sudden flood of it (to me). And that was way too much, I've since stopped having much to do with Genshin on Twitter/Tiktok, but, I still like finding friends who aren't in the toxic bunch, and I play my game in peace.

 

[Murdergurl]

I can handle a lot of stupid shit, tbh. Alotta people nowadays are pretty thin-skinned, imo. But as to the amount of bullshit that I will trudge through depends on exactly what and how much I am getting from said community. If it isn't worth my time, my effort is better spent elsewhere.

 

[GrumpySwallow]

I can handle a lot of BS, and I'm pretty difficult to really offend. I don't see the point in getting my panties in a twist over what some stranger I'll likely never meet in person posts. I've mostly left communities due to thin-skinned people, and mods wanting to spare the feelings of thin-skinned people rather than tell them to nut up and use Block or Mute.

For example, on Discord I was talking about my trip to a Ren. Faire, and one person demanded that I stop talking about it because it was really upsetting to them. I ignored them because everyone else seemed interested, nothing I said was harmful, and if that one person doesn't like it they can do what any mature adult would do and use the Block feature. Mods told me to stop talking about the faire because they don't want this ONE PERSON to be upset or "triggered."

Yeah-no. I'm not going to hang around a place where I have to walk on eggshells because talking about something as innocent as a Renaissance Faire may possibly upset somebody. I go online to relax after taking care of adult responsibilities and I won't add that kind of stress to my life. I simply left the group; no "I Quit" post, no nothing. I am not fuming or seething. I just accepted that the community isn't a good fit for me, left, and moved on.

As for things like fandoms, I just enjoy what I enjoy and generally stay away from the communities. I'm not interested in shipping, and I don't give a crap about whether or not "this character" is whatever sexuality or "that character" has whatever mental issue. If there's a problem or controversy involved in a thing that I like, I'll usually still enjoy it. I've no obligation to stop enjoying what I do just so someone else can indulge in their sense of moral superiority. It does baffle me a bit how many people think they can tell strangers on the internet what they can and cannot do, and expect to be taken seriously.

My life is pretty happy because of this.

 

[Nokumi]

Many of us would love to be in a perfect community where everyone is nice and kind. Unfortunately, such thing does not exist, and I doubt that it ever will. No matter where we are in, regardless of how nice it seems to be, there are poorly behaved people lurking around, waiting to ruin our day, or do something even worse. There are measures that we can take to minimize the chance that such incident occurs, or the negative impact if it happens, but the probability can never be zero. Bad things often happen at a moment, and in a way we least expect, and that is just a risk we have to deal with while being a member of any community.

What I would like to ask is: How much toxicity can you live with in a community? Here are my thoughts:

Livable: I rarely encounter toxic behavior (for example: once or at most twice a week). They are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, do not promote any toxic behavior and will take actions against it.

Borderline cases: I encounter toxic behavior very often (for example: almost everyday). Fortunately, they are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, responsive and trustworthy. There are just too many toxic members for them to deal with. For such communities, I will take actions on a case by case basis. If that community holds significant value to me, I will stay but I will minimize interactions with strangers whenever possible until the problems are mitigated. If possible, I will work with the staffs to resolve the issues that the community is having. If it is just a casual community, I will just move on.

Absolute deal-breaker: There are risks to one's safety and well-being and/ or staffs are unhelpful and untrustworthy and/ or toxic behavior is endorsed or promoted. This is the kind of community that I would stay away at all cost. If I need something from that community, I will seek alternatives whenever possible. If there are absolutely no alternatives whatsoever, I will take extreme measures to make sure that I am safe there. I will just come in, get whatever I need, and leave while drawing as little attention as possible. I am not going to try being a hero and saving that community from its downfall, because I do not have the bravery or what else it takes to do so. I know that there are people who do so. I really appreciate what they are trying to do, and they have my respect. It is just that I am not one of them.

Absolutely ZERO what so ever. Sure my characters may have an attitude and tend to try and put on the bad boy tough guy big girl big boy attitude but deep down their softies and don't like hurting people's feelings

 

[Nokumi]

Absolutely ZERO what so ever. Sure my characters may have an attitude and tend to try and put on the bad boy tough guy big girl big boy attitude but deep down their softies and don't like hurting people's feelings

Me I'm just a socially awkward on the verge of breaking big ol softy

 

[Jannah]

I can handle a lot of stupid shit, tbh. Alotta people nowadays are pretty thin-skinned, imo. But as to the amount of bullshit that I will trudge through depends on exactly what and how much I am getting from said community. If it isn't worth my time, my effort is better spent elsewhere.

Literally this.

 

[Lorsh]

Enough to read/participate in arguments every now and then, but not be swamped in them

 

[LiquidLight]

I used to be able to tolerate a lot. I would even do so at the detriment of myself sometimes. But as I get older I realize I don't have any time for it. I would rather be around people who make me feel good, want to have fun, and have positive outlooks on life. I just can't do the negative Nancy's anymore. xD Ain't nobody got time for that!

 

[Squid Pro Quo]

Define toxic? I ask, because some think having rules for a universe and how it operates is toxic.

Now, if we're using toxic to mean assholery, it depends. Heads will butt, and personalities do clash. I'm thick skinned and numb to it. You can't expect to be in a community without the occasional acidic incident. However, if it's constant. I leave.

 

[Serenata]

None. I rather ignore and move on instead of entertaining it at all.

 

[Gowi]

Everybody is problematic to some extent.

I think acceptable toxicity comes down to such behaviors (such as downright reprehensible views) in a community comes down with commonality and how the community's moderators actively look to protect its userbase. There's no such thing as a "zero toxicity" in any community, no matter what people want to convince themselves of.

 

[DellaBurke]

Many of us would love to be in a perfect community where everyone is nice and kind. Unfortunately, such thing does not exist, and I doubt that it ever will. No matter where we are in, regardless of how nice it seems to be, there are poorly behaved people lurking around, waiting to ruin our day, or do something even worse. There are measures that we can take to minimize the chance that such incident occurs, or the negative impact if it happens, but the probability can never be zero. Bad things often happen at a moment, and in a way we least expect, and that is just a risk we have to deal with while being a member of any community.

What I would like to ask is: How much toxicity can you live with in a community? Here are my thoughts:

Livable: I rarely encounter toxic behavior (for example: once or at most twice a week). They are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, do not promote any toxic behavior and will take actions against it.

Borderline cases: I encounter toxic behavior very often (for example: almost everyday). Fortunately, they are just annoying and cause very little to no long-term negative impact. Staffs are helpful, responsive and trustworthy. There are just too many toxic members for them to deal with. For such communities, I will take actions on a case by case basis. If that community holds significant value to me, I will stay but I will minimize interactions with strangers whenever possible until the problems are mitigated. If possible, I will work with the staffs to resolve the issues that the community is having. If it is just a casual community, I will just move on.

Absolute deal-breaker: There are risks to one's safety and well-being and/ or staffs are unhelpful and untrustworthy and/ or toxic behavior is endorsed or promoted. This is the kind of community that I would stay away at all cost. If I need something from that community, I Chatbot AI Mod APK seek alternatives whenever possible. If there are absolutely no alternatives whatsoever, I will take extreme measures to make sure that I am safe there. I will just come in, get whatever I need, and leave while drawing as little attention as possible. I am not going to try being a hero and saving that community from its downfall, because I do not have the bravery or what else it takes to do so. I know that there are people who do so. I really appreciate what they are trying to do, and they have my respect. It is just that I am not one of them.

It's understandable to have different tolerance levels when it comes to toxicity in a community, and everyone's limit may vary. It's important to prioritize our safety and well-being in any community we belong to.

It's good that you have a clear understanding of the level of toxicity you can tolerate and how you would respond in different scenarios. Being aware of this can help you make better decisions about the communities you want to be a part of and the actions you would take if you encounter toxic behavior.
It is okay to prioritize one's own safety and well-being over trying to save a toxic community from its downfall. It takes courage to recognize and acknowledge one's own limitations, and it is important to respect and support those who choose to take a different approach. Ultimately, finding a community that aligns with one's values and provides a safe and healthy environment is essential for long-term well-being and happiness.