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Fandom Homestuck - [ALTERATA]

==>

He is dirty. Wolfram is almost as bad about leaving holes in the front and backyard as you are. SO much so that when you were smaller the two of you bonded over your hole digging, leading to some adorable photos of you and your beloved Wolf covered in grime as you excavated holes together.

You walk outside.
 
==>

For the record, perhaps praying to gods of death wasn't the right type of god to pray to. Seems you'll be on a scavenger hunt for now. You captchalogue the EMPTY ENVELOPE, to combine with your CLIENT DISC later when you find it.

==>Remi: Search the house.

That'd take too long. You're just going to check the most common places for missing mail to go. One of them being the kitchen counter, the other being your Tio's room. The kitchen is connected to the dining room, separated from the living room by only a thin counter and bar space.
 
Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

Here you find something that is, in fact, a hole.
Whatever he was digging for, you can't see it.
You can't even clean up, as you lack a SHOVELKIND specibus like your Nan.

Noivian Noivian

You enter the KITCHEN.

What do you do, here in the kitchen?
 
==>

That is one hole if you've ever seen one. You kick around the dirt for a little while before wondering what he could be doing at the behest of your Nan. Despite her roguishly aggressive charm, you grandmother is a shrewd old woman who fancies puzzles whenever given the opportunity. But she also likes to test your raw physical capability on occasion as well. THis could go either way.

You begin to circle around the perimeter of your house.
 
==>Remi: Pose dramatically with a butcher knife.

You take a butcher knife, or the largest blade you can find in this kitchen, and do a pose like you've seen on all the cool kids' phones in school. Something along the lines of being covered in blood, licking the blade. Mm. Iron-y. You bet it would taste better with ketchup.

But that's not why you're here.

==>Remi: Screech like a monkey and throw up in the sink.

Ew, no! That's a disgusting thing to do, considering that you need to wash food and plates in that sink. Talk about a waste of bleach!

But this sink... the steel is so... shiny...

==>Remi: Captchalogue the knife.

Good point. You might need it for a spell or something. Cut open a pod of vanilla beans or whatever. You captchalogue the KITCHEN KNIFE.

...

You forgot why you're here.

...

The game! Right!

==>Remi: To Tio's room!
 
Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

You enter the BACKYARD.

Back here is the SHED/DOGHOUSE, as a normal doghouse would be too small for dear, sweet, precious Wolfram.
Seems the poor boy was shut out when someone foolishly CLOSED THE DOOR.

-

Noivian Noivian

You pass through the bead curtain that is the door to your Tio's room.

Inside is various SUPERSTITIOUS MUMBO-JUMBO. Dream catchers, warding candles, and the like.
God, he's so weird.

You hear a noise from the FRONT DOOR, better hurry!
 
==>

You note the closed shed door with amounting suspicion as you raise your axe up. You carefully open up the latch, only to kick the door forward, bracing yourself for the moment of impact as you axe remains held high. At this point in the game, she's unpredictable. SHe does like to keep you on your toes after all.

 
==>Remi: DISCS. NOW!!

Crap, he's home. He's home! Get in, get out, no muss, no fuss.

Gods, if only your Tio weren't so weird with his room, you could probably find these things fast. You pull open all the drawers and riffle through them. You toss a few unhanged dream catchers aside and search piles on nightstands, praying once again, this time to whatever luck gods you knew (which were surprisingly few) that you'd find your discs without causing a confrontation.
 
Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

Nobody's there.

Wolfram takes his place on the cozy floor of the shed.
There... appears to be a note on the shed counter.

yo chump
attic
NOW

The vile woman.

-

Noivian Noivian

You got the secreted away SBURB CLIENT, hiding in one of the many DREAM CATCHER PILES. You tuck it away nicely in the envelope.
A figure stands before you, blocking the curtain door.

Didn't you know?
It's is impossible to get mail without a round or three of familial strife.


-

Squad141 Squad141

Yeah... he ain't even in here.
You said it yourself, he's TAKING A NAP, most likely in his own room.
 
==> Remi: See it coming

There's no way you could have possibly saw this coming.

Unable to locate the server disc, you whirl on the form blocking your escape route. Brandishing your weapon of choice, you initiate a STRIFE!
 
ADAM: GET PISSED AND STORM INTO HIS ROOM!!

Why would you do that? He's taking a nap after all, so you quietly leave the Training Room, and head back through the living room. After one more peek at Akuma Menyu, you get back in the elevator, a little peeved, yes, but wiser. After all, your UNCLE is a great agile Samurai from the early ages (of the 1900s). He knew you would get overzealous and go downstairs, find his bust go to the Training Room. And now hes awaiting you in his bedroom, probably meditating your arrival.

You hear a clunk as the elevator reaches the top floor almost-silently, and you step out, KENDO SWORD in hand. Before you go, you stop and rest for a second in front of the Clock. Your Uncle bought this really expensive japanese/classical grandfather clock form a shady lady on craigslist, and he is still a bit worried about, but you find it soothing. The color scheme is that of four color: Orange, Green, Red, and Purple. The Orange is the most prominent, for some reason, though you aren't complaining. You find the clock peaceful, and meditate in front of it. The reason? You have an internal tempo, one that helps you make great music and songs. This clock always seems to be on beat with it, and helps you calm down.

But now, its time to face your mentor. Karate Kid did it, and so can you (he did do this right?).
You open the door to your UNCLES room, organized with busts and origami cranes all over the walls.

Eidolon Astronaut Eidolon Astronaut
 
==>

You grunt in slight dismay. You toss the note back onto the counter and walk over to one side of the shed, quickly captchaloguing a pair of GARDENING SHEARS to your sylladex and giving Wolfram a final pat on the head before leaving. YOu make your gradual ascent back up to the second floor of your house. This isn't surprising to you in the slightest, after all, everyone knows that you can't get the mail without a round or three of strife. You pass by your Nan's 'suitors' once again and look upon them with eye-rolling disatisfaction.


She even has a roaring fire in here amidst the packed house of ghouls and golems that line the walls. It's springtime! What the hell Nan? Before you just adjacent to the kitchenette stands a large, looming grandfather clock, schemed strangely enough with four colors, purple, red, orange and green. It looks old and worn, at least a century or two old. Though the red seems to adorn it the most. You've grown up with the thing, but have no clue where it originated. Though the strangest detail of all would be its tempo. It's stuck on a time and has been for all your life, its silence a mystery.

You come between the two doors to each of your bedrooms and look up to see the attic entrance. You hold a hand up gently, and ever so nimbly catch the chord between your fingers and pull it down.
 
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Noivian Noivian

STRIFE!

You then proceed to have a short but still tough strife with your Tio.
He's letting you off easy this time. Who are you kidding, he's kind of a big pushover, he couldn't hurt you if he tried.

-

Squad141 Squad141

There he is, but he ain't sleeping.

It sounds like gunfire, but you know he's just tapping away at BIG BERTHA, the only thing here more ancient than him. Damn stupid typewriter, why's he got to be so weird?

But, you guess this was inevitable.

-

Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

You ASCEND into the attic.

It's empty.

Or rather, it seems empty.
 
He looks up at you, and smiles.
He looks like hes not been expecting you, though you know that's false. He set all these unfortunate events up, just to make you come to him.
To prove your suspicions, he gets up from BIG BERTHA, and immediately hs his samurai sword in hand.

The Time has come, as you raise your sword.

Eidolon Astronaut Eidolon Astronaut
 
==>

You take a precarious step forward, keeping your stance low as you prepare to reach for anything at the last second while your dominant hand remains poised, raising your axe in preparation for whatever deft maneuver you'll have to pull off to fend off your guardian.

 
==>Remi: ABSCOND

He's weak. Wimpy. You need a thesaurus to properly describe how utterly useless and strange your Tio is.

You've decided you don't like him much.

You like Adam's guardian much better.

But regardless, you've got your discs. Well, one of them, anyways. You suppose you'll need to do a second round to get the server disc.

==>Remi: Pester chums.

Time to see who else is ready to go!
Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

TT: ruby
TT: ruby
TT: rubyrubyribryirbyribrurbrikjdoasn;ogariuawef'ksdfklj
TT: i got my client disc
TT: whats new with you
TT: ready to go?
TT: is adam online?
 
Squad141 Squad141

You then proceed to have your own strife, involving some innocuous double of a sword and a feather, but that's not really all that relevant.

The aethers of the great DIPLOMANCIES decide that after your through beating, you would be left with the SBURB CLIENT and SERVER, before you are promptly kicked the fuck out of Sir's room.

-

Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures

Nan jumps through the attic door to face you, she was never in here to begin with, it was a trap!

Time to do this, you guess.

-

Noivian Noivian

Seems Ruby's a bit busy, she's about to have her ass handed to her like a dame on butler island.
 
==> Ruby: strife!

You begin to engage in strife with your nan. You wield your Hatchet at the ready as you begin to fight her. You then engage in a more taxing strife which involves the extensive recycling of your stack modus pelting your guardian with planks of wood and gardening tools. However, you come out defeated after being bested physically and strategically yet again. Knocked flat on your ass after falling down the attic stairs for what surely could've been a great opportunity for a reference.
 
Adam: Pester chums and play the game

After that equal battle of wit and wager, of mind and matter, you once again lost. Sadly, this is the process that you must go through to become as good a Samurai as your guardian. But now is not the time for this silly banter, as YOU HAVE THE GAMES! You abscond back to your room to pester some chumps about your recent experiences, and the game you've FINALLY acquired, and that today can finally become somewhat productive, though of course your patient enough to wait for anything interesting to happen.

-- aikidoTempomaster [AT] started pestering timestampThanatos [TT] at 6:07 --
AT: Remi, are you there?
AT: I've acquired my copies of the game, both SERVER and CLIENT
AT: Do you have yours? And are Ruby or AA ready?


Noivian Noivian Elision of Ecritures Elision of Ecritures Eidolon Astronaut Eidolon Astronaut
 
==>Remi: Get a head start and install the client

You plug in a disc drive into your laptop (because what reasonable laptop has a built-in disc drive these days?) and begin the installation.

Seems like Adam's online now.
TT: yup im here
TT: lucky
TT: i only have my client
TT: so i think we're supposed to connect client to server?
TT: can you be my server until i get mine?
TT: ruby seems busy
TT: idk about dani


Squad141 Squad141
 
==> oh god

You begin falling down another flight of stairs to the ground level of the house as the second round begins to commence. Oh fuck. You begin your second round by employing a different strategy, you then begin dueling your Nan on top of the family dining table. Your swipes feel soft as they slice through the air. How can she move so fast?

After a solid side swipe with her shin, you're sent sprawling across the floor. You dodge her blows, each piercing blow of her shovel stabbing for you as you bob and weave through the number of statues lined up in your living room. You roll forward, managing to position yourself behind her as you employ your other equipped weapon in your strife deck!

You begin to spray TOXIC AMOUNTS of AXE BODY SPRAY everywhere.
 
==> it keeps
You continue your strife for a third round. This time you have resorted to solely melee and martial prowess, your swipes often connect with hers as the hilts of your weapons collide and clash.Her pure strength is overwhelming, and her speed makes her defensive maneuvers nigh impenetrable. She refuses to hold back as she flicks her shovel handle and flings your hatchet into the ceiling. She grabs you by the forearm and slams you into the dining table, cracking it and what feels like your spine in half in the process.


She stabs her shovel into the ground, managing to pierce through the wooden foundation of your cottage home. She cracks both of her knuckles as she puts her fists up. Oh jesus. Her mangrit is way too high for her to be throwing actual punches around lest you bear witness to the curvature of the earth from how hard you'll be flying.

She rears back as she suddenly vanishes, and reappears next to you with a flashstep. The might of her punch goes sailing forward as your hair is blown back from the wind it generated, but she stops herself mid way, and punctuates the lack of impact by flicking your nose instead. Nevertheless, you fall back, defeated, oto the rubble of the table behind you.

Eidolon Astronaut Eidolon Astronaut
 
==> Be Someone New
Untitled.png


==> Who's This Bastard?
enter name.png
==> Enter Name


|
High MidgetBafoon


High MidgetBafoon

No!!

==>Try Again

Dani Ecrosen

Dani Ecrosen!

==> Hello Dani

Your Name is Dani Ecrosen, also known as AeipathicAsylum [AA] on Pesterchum. And today happens to NOT be your birthday! Nor is it the birthday of any of your friends. At least there is no birthday that you can quite remember off the top of your head! Although today still happens to be a BIG DAY! Today is the day that you will receive a brand new game in the mail which you plan to play with your friends! You have a variety of interests which include Trying and FAILING to play the DRUMS, along with a variety of other instruments
, reading MEDICAL BOOKS, staring at COLORFUL objects, eating CANDY, and of course DYING ON THE INSIDE. Though that last part you can't really help. Though you do happen to like PLANTS quite a bit as well, though they usually end up dying due to you forgetting to water them, by playing GAMES instead. Though luckily one thing that hasn't dropped dead around you yet is your CAT, SWEET, though you sometimes call him Sweets, or Sweetie on occasion.

==> See what your friends are up too

Alright! sounds fun!!

AeipathicAsylum [AA] Is now online. ( Squad141 Squad141 )
AeipathingAsylum [AA] Has begun Pestering AikidoTempomaster [AT]--


AA: Hi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AA: I'm here now!!!
AA: What's new?
AA: How are you?
AA: Whats's happening? !!

AA: Hey Hey Hey!! : D
 

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